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Who has had their child attend the birth of siblings?
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Posted 02 February 2013 - 11:16 AM
For those who had their child attend your labour with their siblings, how did they take it?
DS will be 21 months when our baby is due and so far I am planning to birth at the Birth Centre and am hopefully having DS and DH there. However, DS is currently 15 months old and doesn't deal well with me being sick or in pain. Eg, when I've been throwing up or had a coughing fit he cries, if I fall over or get a cramp, he gets upset. I'm not sure if this is just his age at the moment, but he is pretty sensitive kid, gets upset and cries when the cats fight.
So now I'm thinking maybe it's not a good idea to have him there which means DH will look after him and I'll have to birth alone (unless I go ahead with a student midwife that I don't know if I want)
So how old was your child when they attended the birth of their sibling?
How did they take it?
How did they go seeing you in pain and contractions etc?
Posted 02 February 2013 - 02:24 PM
My second was born at home, DD was almost 3 at the time. I was labouring overnight and DD woke around 3am to my screaming which unsettled her a bit but she knew all about what was happening. DH went back to bed with her (I didn't want him around anyway) and the midwife woke them both at about 7am just in time to see DD2 make her entrance. She talked for a few weeks about what she'd seen, the blood and guts and all that, but she wasn't disturbed by it. It was more of a matter of fact type thing!
Now whenever she and her little friends play babies she takes great pleasure in informing them how it really happens .....
I think having your child at the birth is a fine thing to plan for but I do think you need a backup plan in case he is unsettled or unhappy or just doesn't want to be there.....
There's a great book called Hello Baby about a child preparing for the homebirth of his new sibling, we loved reading it to DD and it really helped her get used to the idea.
Posted 02 February 2013 - 02:30 PM
I'd get your parents (they're pretty involved, aren't they?) to look after the toddler. In my experience, toddlers struggle to understand why their parents can't pay attention to them RIGHT NOW at the best of times and you don't want to be distracted while in labour.
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