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Help - freaking out - I did something awful
really long sorry - i'm freaking out.

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70 replies to this topic

#1 quietone90

Posted 31 January 2013 - 07:56 PM

Okay, i'm going anon under a fake un. I need some advice - police or legal if possible.

I was in a linen shop a few days ago and I was so distracted and emotional (my first DD starting school the next day) and I saw a the doona cover that I had wanted for ages on clearance I had another large country road bag and my DD was with me and showing me nice sheet sets - i'd put my bags down looking for a particular size and my DD was shoving sheet sets on top of my bag - I pushed the stuff to the side and asked the shop assistant for my size and picked up my bag. She only had king size. I was about to walk out of the shop and shoved my bag on my other shoulder and thought 'that feels heavy'. the lady was looking at me weirdly and I freaked out and walked out of the shop. I had taken a sheet set. So stupid. I hid it in the next shop I went to. Then I was acting so stupidly - in shock. I went back to the shop and laybyed the doona cover (in the larger size and thought i'll just get a new doona soon) - using all my correct details and paid the deposit on credit card. I wanted to see her reaction to see if she suspected me - and wanted to work out if I could get the sheet set back into the shop somehow. I was so scared. In the end I decided to go home and try and get it back in there the next day - which I did - and picked up my layby.

Now i don't know what to do - i keep thinking the police are going to turn up at my door any second. I can't sleep and feel sick.

I'm the kind of person that goes back to the supermarket to pay for something they forgot to charge me for - I freak out if i'm parked 10 minutes over the limit in the shopping centre carpark - I don't do this sort of thing!!

Do I go to the police and turn myself in??? I can't think straight

#2 Ferelsmegz

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:01 PM

Oh you silly!!! Take it back and explain!

My DS stole stuff all the time!! I took it all back and explained rather sheepishly. They were ok mostly. No one charged me!

#3 Ice Queen

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:03 PM

So you returned it right?  

Please don't be losing sleep over this.  The police are generally quite busy with break-ins, drunk drivers, hold ups, rapes, hoon driving, domestic violence.......they are not going to turn up.

Have a cup of tea and an early night.  biggrin.gif

#4 Escapin

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:04 PM

Just take it back. You'll be OK original.gif And as a PPer said, what else is going on that you're so distracted (and now so stressed)...

#5 Peppery

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:05 PM

I would take back and explain. I hung something on my nephews pram, wandered out of the shop, realised about 15 minutes later and rushed back to pay.

#6 jamdonut

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:06 PM

This is all a bit... bizarre.

You returned the doona cover to the shop, right? Stop worrying. The store would have to check the stock is missing before they could report it stolen to the police. If they check the stock on the floor against the stock listing in their computer system, they'll realise it hasn't been stolen.

Also, you have a receipt for the doona that you purchased. So there's no problems there.

Edited by jamdonut, 31 January 2013 - 08:07 PM.

#7 twinboys

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:07 PM

Then I was acting so stupidly - in shock. I went back to the shop and laybyed the doona cover (in the larger size and thought i'll just get a new doona soon) - using all my correct details and paid the deposit on credit card. I wanted to see her reaction to see if she suspected me - and wanted to work out if I could get the sheet set back into the shop somehow. I was so scared. In the end I decided to go home and try and get it back in there the next day - which I did - and picked up my layby.

You have returned the sheets so you have not stolen any thing.
You maybe remembered as that slightly odd woman but you will not be known as that shoplifting woman  wink.gif

#8 Peppery

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:08 PM

Sorry misread - if you have already returned it i would forget about it completely. No need to work yourself up over it.

#9 Swarley

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:12 PM

I hid it in the next shop I went to.

Do you mean you put the sheet set back in the next shop?

I think if that was a typo, and you returned them - you have nothing to worry about.

If you didn't, I still don't think the police would bother. And I assume the shop assistant would've said something on the spot because I don't think you can be charged unless you're in possession of the item?
Maybe. Not sure.

Either way... I'd try let it go.

#10 epl0822

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:12 PM

I've forgotten to pay for items underneath the pram quite a few times! Once I didn't realise until I got home. I simply returned the next day, apologised, and paid for it then. Every single time the staff are grateful for the honesty and they don't make an issue out of it. Another time I was holding a scarf thinking I would buy it. After walking around the shop a couple of times I decided not to get it, but absent mindedly walked out with it. I just walked back and told the assistant I was returning with an item I forgot to pay for. She just laughed at me (in a friendly way) and that was it.

#11 quietone90

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:13 PM

Sorry - yes - it is bizzarre... I have taken the item back - but they don't know I have taken it back - don't know for sure that they know I took it either...

I paid for a different doona cover in full at the same store...

As for being distracted and stressed - part of it is DD starting school - part of it is me worrying about a health issue - which I think is just me being silly, another part of me is worried deeply about a best friend who has shut herself away from the world. No excuse really - I'm just not myself.

I'm just worried that the shop assistant might have reported the theft - and since I gave all my details for the layby, and returned the stolen item without their knowledge they don't know it's back??

Wondering if it's better just to go to the police and tell them everything?

#12 luke's mummu

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:13 PM

I would return it (looks like you already have), or donate it to a charity shop if I was too embarrassed too. I am sure you're not the first or last person to do it.

#13 luke's mummu

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:15 PM

QUOTE (quietone90 @ 31/01/2013, 09:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I paid for a different doona cover in full at the same store...

Wondering if it's better just to go to the police and tell them everything?

No I think the police have better stuff to do with their time.

#14 Wonderlust

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:15 PM

You returned it Op, so I don't think the police will be hunting you down.

When dd was a newborn, I was out shopping with the pram in a childrens clothing store. In my sleep deprived and exhausted state, I didn't realise that a bodysuit that must have been on the floor caught on the wheels of the pram.

I didn't even see it until we were nearly out of the shopping centre and dd was crying, so I never went back. Took it home, washed it and dd wore it a few times. Still feel bad about it  ph34r.gif

#15 BadCat

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:16 PM

Wait, you returned the sheets?  Like you kind of smuggled them back into the shop?  Is that right?

If that's the case you'll be fine.  

If it's really freaking you out phone the store tomorrow and ask to speak to someone in charge.  Tell them what happened and that you returned the sheets.  Unless they are a complete tosser they will tell you not to worry about it.

In future if you accidentally take something just take it straight back and apologise.  It happens more often than you imagine and nobody is going to arrest you for honesty.

#16 quietone90

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:19 PM

yep - smuggled them back in would be the right way to describe it.... smuggled them back in and then picked up my layby. I don't ever want to go back to that store again... sad.gif

#17 i-love-my-son

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:21 PM

Agree with the PP's recommendations - if it's bugging you, go back to the shop and ask to talk to the manager, explain you went out of the shop with the sheets by accident, freaked, and returned them the next day.  I'm sure they can check it out on the security camera.

Everyone makes mistakes - I bought DS a pair of sandals once, he put them straight on, I put what I thought were the old sandals in the bag - only to find out once I got home that the shop assistant had already put the old sandals in the box in the bag, so I'd actually swiped two brand new shoes!

I rang up straight away, apologised profusely and returned them the next morning (couldn't do it same day, was late afternoon).

Best of luck.

#18 jessie123

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:27 PM

QUOTE (Ehill @ 31/01/2013, 08:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
So you returned it right?  

Please don't be losing sleep over this.  The police are generally quite busy with break-ins, drunk drivers, hold ups, rapes, hoon driving, domestic violence.......they are not going to turn up.

Have a cup of tea and an early night.  biggrin.gif

Exactly this.

Is there something else going on with you OP. Your reaction and worrying about this is really out of proportion to what has happened.

#19 nano-tyrannus

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:28 PM

QUOTE (quietone90 @ 31/01/2013, 08:56 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Okay, i'm going anon under a fake un. I need some advice - police or legal if possible.

I call troll... everyone knows you can't talk about a legal case/criminal matter on a public forum... such noobishness

Edited by nano-tyrannus, 31 January 2013 - 08:29 PM.

#20 quietone90

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:34 PM

okay - i honestly didn't know that nano-tyrannus

bowing out now - sorry don't want to get into any more trouble than I already could. No troll though.

#21 fairymagic

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:36 PM

Don't stress. If they had suspected you taking them in the first place they would have followed you out of the store and questioned you about what was in your bag. Because they didn't, they wouldn't not have realised the sheet set was in your bag.

Stores will not go back over security footage for an entire day looking for shoplifters. They would use it only to back up a suspicion of someone they caught already. They are not going to look at it, see you and report you to the police.

I, like others posting above, have had the same thing happen. One time it was some baby wraps my son had grabbed off the shelf near the checkout and had in the pram - took them back immediately. Another time, like you, I was so distracted that I forgot to pay for some milk under the pram - didn't realise that one till my two children were strapped into their car seats so I admit, I kept that one. Another time I had toilet rolls stored under the pram - paid for other stuff at the checkout then as I walked away, realised they were still there. Turned around and went back and paid for them.

Don't stress. They obviously did not see you take the sheets hence why you were not stopped leaving the store. You did the right thing taking them back - even though they didn't realise you took them back they didn't realise you took them in the first place either is my guess.

#22 QueenElsa

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:38 PM

Oh don't worry - I have walked out of shop a few times with items that a DD had added to pram / bag. Kmart, ikea, small bag shop, Coles.....I just go back with it, apologise, say it was the child and I've never been forced to pay for it.  We then have a laugh about kids and get on with our day.

The smuggling thing is a little odd....immediate, up-front honesty is the best policy OP.  what's the worst that will happen - that you pay for it!

The police won't care....that will not be chasing you.


#23 Zachary Quack

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:38 PM

If you'd just walked off and kept them, "it wouldn't really be noticed until stocktake and then it would be written off" unless they had caught you at the door. This is according to my sister who manages a retail store. Chill, OP, you did the right thing and no one will be the least interested in chasing you!

#24 EBeditor

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:42 PM

No-one can give you legal advice on the forums, but be assured that many of us with toddlers have had them accidentally steal something  - mine have! Where possible I have taken the item back but occasionaly things have been found days later, in any case the Police have never showed up at my door.

#25 namie

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:42 PM

I'd forget about it now.

You've returned the sheet set so there's no harm done. If they ever care to check the footage and notice you walk out with it, they'll also see the footage of you taking it back.

I walked out of Target with 2 breastfeeding tops when DS1 was a baby. I'd tried them on (both black cotton tops), then draped them across the hood of the pram (also black) while I wandered around looking for some things for DS1. He woke up so I pushed the hood back so he could see me and proceeded to hunt down a swim set.

I got confused by the lack of matching items, but managed to find a top I liked but with no bottoms. I took a single pair of bottoms to the counter and asked if I could take both, and what the price of the top would be given part of the set was missing. After she sorted it all and charged me, I think something like $8, I paid and walked out.

It wasn't until I'd loaded bags and a by-then cranky DS1 into the car and went to fold up the pram that I realised I hadn't remembered to pay for the tops. DS1 started crying so I loaded the pram in the car and went home.

An honest mistake, I went back the next day with the tops and told the lady there what had happened and paid for them. No one followed me home, no one reported me to the police (that I know of).

Simple mistake. Fixed it. Moved on. Don't worry about this anymore, divert all your attention to your DD, your health and your friend.

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