Jump to content

Guide for New EB users *Fluff*


  • Please log in to reply
151 replies to this topic

#1 TKS

Posted 31 January 2013 - 05:32 PM

*fluff*
As someone who mostly lurks I've observed many poor posters make the same mistakes over and over only to get so bruised by the responses that they are probably scared for life. So just starting a thread on topics to for New EB users to avoid or at least put on the battle armour for (or topics for older members to get the popcorn out for  biggrin.gif ). My contribution is to avoid posts on:
  • Baby Bonus
  • Childcare
  • School Lunches (yoghurt, white bread)


There are many others - what else can people suggest?

#2 Jax12

Posted 31 January 2013 - 05:41 PM

Parking with Pram areas used by people without babies vent
Using disabled toilets to change nappies
Piercing ears in babies/young children
Circumcision
YAAB - Why is everyone so mean?

ETA
I heard the weirdest name today, Le-a/Abcde
How do I get pregnant with twins?
Help me write a wishing well poem


Edited by Jax12, 31 January 2013 - 05:50 PM.


#3 Feral Mozzie

Posted 31 January 2013 - 05:46 PM

Whether its ok for men to go in parents rooms.
Leaving your children home alone.
WDYT of the name Naeveh?

#4 Copacetic

Posted 31 January 2013 - 05:52 PM

DO NOT mention special needs unless the thread is specifically about special needs.

If you take a pregnancy test, you must take a photograph of the wee stick and make it as blurry as possible, then post it.

Marshmallow is lovely in a salad.

#5 Cranky Old Woman

Posted 31 January 2013 - 05:53 PM

Sometimes you will be surprised at how a seemingly innocuous question or remark causes all hell to break loose. biggrin.gif

#6 Guest_Dinah_Harris_*

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:00 PM

Using soup packet mixes in recipes
Expecting grandparents to be free child care
Breast feeding should be compulsory
Going to a footballer's room is 'asking for it'
Why I let my toddler scream in soprano for three hours at the cafe

#7 Nobody Cool

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:02 PM

Do not go into the Pet forum asking people to recommend the best oodle-crosses. In fact, it's probably best not to go into the Pet section at all.

#8 HRH Countrymel

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:02 PM

Do not under any circumstances wander unsolicited into the Assisted Conception section and suggest that people need to "relax and have a positive attitude" as that's all you need to get pregnant.



This will not you may be surprised to learn cause people to 'relax' not will it turn their attitude into 'positive'.....

It will however cause them to turn arctic with fury and possibly make them follow you into other threads and point out your shortcomings...

*hangs head in shame for mornings little outburst*

*realises she isn't actually sorry and still thinks poster is an idiot*

#9 (feral)epg

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:04 PM

QUOTE (Shady Lane @ 31/01/2013, 04:02 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Do not go into the Pet forum asking people to recommend the best oodle-crosses. In fact, it's probably best not to go into the Pet section at all.


Only go there if you are a registered breeder and your cat is 100% indoors.


#10 monochrome

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:12 PM

Don't comment about any parenting style in a negative way
Don't tell anyone that you are formula feeding
Don't comment about how people dress their children
Don't tell anyone that you may enjoy being away from your child(ren)

#11 9ferals

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:12 PM

Any kind of parking question is best avoided I think - not only pram parking but accessible (wheelchair/disabled) parking, waiting for parking, not waiting for parking, parking by the door, parking far away, you get the idea.

And any post involving the words "discreet" or "modest" may also be unwise unless you are sure about what you are starting.

#12 *cough*

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:17 PM

Use good grammar, spell check and use paragraphs.

#13 Funwith3

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:18 PM

Tizzie Hall....or anything to do with controlled crying

#14 The Old Feral

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:21 PM

The beauty of EB is that ANY subject or comment, even the most innocuous one you can think  of,  has the potential to become a fiery train wreck.

#15 Boombox

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:25 PM

This was posted many years ago- but, as is EB's way, it is still very relevant and helpful for all new comers.

QUOTE
QUOTE
1. Thou shalt not enclose thy baby's bottom in the clothes of the Devil (i.e disposable nappies)

2. Thou shalt feed the fruit of thy loins naught but the fruit of the land and other wholegrain items (not including Roll-Ups or muesli bars)

3. Thou shalt breastfeed thy child through the dark nights and long days upon us, through mastitis and chewed off nipples

4. Thou shall learn the wonder of self soothing, and post multiple times your great joy in order to make others among you less worthy

5. Thou shalt understand the terms "scragging" and "bogan"and use them righteously

6. Thou shalt judge the parenting of others and convey this by starting thy posts with "I'm not judging but...."

7. Thou shalt not admit defeat at the training of the potty even though the rivers of pee run freely

8 Thou shalt post and check for replies every ten seconds, for this is the way of the EBers

9 Thou shalt simmer with fury when a sister responds negatively to thine own post and secretly cheer when the sister posts a problem with her own brethren

10 Thou shalt not complete the laundry/dinner/fancy dress costume/cleaning of the oven as thou shalt become engrossed in the word of the many upon the forum

Verily, ladies, I have spoken


#16 Lady Excentrique

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:25 PM

I've made so many mistakes over the years I can't even think of them all!

-don't express your opinion.
-never say anything unless your prepared to stand my your statement and defend it unto the death.
-never start a topic on a whim or because you are bored. Spend at least 2hrs contemplating the consequences of starting your thread.



#17 Squeekums Da Feral

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:26 PM

QUOTE (Copacetic @ 31/01/2013, 05:22 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Marshmallow is lovely in a salad.



sick.gif    blink.gif   ffear.gif   nno.gif

I feel ill now
Someone cant have really said that. Right?


#18 elizabethany

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:27 PM

Any sort of opinion that goes against the mob mentailty

That there are reasons to not breastfeed until child is (insert age here)

Calling something (anything) bogan

regretting children/wanting to have done things differently.

Any government payments, especially the baby bonus.

#19 Lady Excentrique

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:29 PM

If you do end up in an argument the best way to win is to yell:

Your obviously a lazy cow and a terrible mother! Get off the computer and go spend some time with your poor neglected children! You spend way to much time on EB!!! I don't, I'm leaving, I'm the bestest mother ever, YOUSE ARE ALL b**chES.

#20 Copacetic

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:30 PM

QUOTE (squeekums @ 31/01/2013, 07:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
sick.gif    blink.gif   ffear.gif   nno.gif

I feel ill now
Someone cant have really said that. Right?



Yes indeed.

#21 ComradeBob

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:31 PM

Squeekums, numerous people over the years have declared this s tasty morsel indeed  blink.gif

Remember, raisins are verily the work of the devil.

It is generally not a good idea to decry gay marriage on obscure, badly interpreted sections of the Bible.


And when you flounce, drawing attention to your hawt size 10 bod and black sports car will only earn you roars of laughter from us chunky chumps,and a place in EB history forevermore.

Edited by WingBob, 31 January 2013 - 06:33 PM.


#22 Feral-Lausii

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:34 PM

Religion.  wink.gif

#23 Lifesgood

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:47 PM

Might it be easier to start a thread about what it IS safe to discuss? Would be a much shorter thread.

Ah bugger it newbies, post what you like, it's entertaining.

#24 Angelina Ballerina

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:49 PM

Don't ask "do you think I might be pregnant blah blah". You may as well ask the magic 8 ball.
Spend a few dollars and pee on a freakin' stick!

Don't ever mention alcohol and pregnancy, baby showers, kids parties.

Edited by Angelina Ballerina, 31 January 2013 - 06:50 PM.


#25 ComradeBob

Posted 31 January 2013 - 06:54 PM

You forgot the smiley Quill. It should be

HTH  original.gif




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Ada Nicodemou: 'I can never be completely happy again'

Home and Away actress Ada Nicodemou has opened up about the loss of her stillborn baby.

10 things to consider when you're thinking about trying for a baby

Before you start tracking your menstrual cycle and reading up on the best positions to get pregnant, there are a few other things you may want to consider.

Baby Gammy's dad tries to claim charity money

The biological father of baby Gammy has reportedly tried to access charity money raised for the little boy's medical costs.

How special surgery and IVF can create a post-vasectomy baby

Cricket legend Glenn McGrath and his second wife Sara are expecting their first child together, thanks to IVF and a delicate surgical sperm retrieval process that helped the couple to conceive.

Belle Gibson's mother 'disgusted and embarrassed'

The mother of disgraced wellness blogger Belle Gibson has accused her daughter of lying about her childhood in an attempt to garner public sympathy.

Life On Mars

It's men who need 'retraining', not women

We are all responsible for our own behaviour. Telling victims to harden up is wrong.

Doctor's mobile phone 'left inside c-section mum'

A new mum claims a doctor left his mobile phone inside her after delivering her baby via caesarean section.

I'm a mum and I'm following my dreams

I want my kids to know that no matter what happens in life, you can still be who it is that you've always wanted to be.

Those first daycare days

I had this innate 'mum' moment the other day.

'If one person had listened, my life would have been so different'

Katherine's father will die in prison for the horrifying sexual abuse of his daughter. Yet she is the one with the true life sentence.

Couple to celebrate terminally ill baby's birthday in unique way

Baby Jai Bishop has lived at Starship Hospital for the past seven months, with his parents flying back and forth from Hokitika, 1100km away, to be by his side.

This new plan undermines breastfeeding and baby health at everyone's expense

Mothers, babies, the health system and the wider society are going to pay the price of this new budget.

Trying to understand why your baby is upset

Working out what?s underlying your baby's fussiness can be a case of trial and error. Here are a few common causes and how you can remedy each one.

When those you love judge your parenting

In today's society, never has it been harder to parent without judgment. But what about when judgment is coming from closer to home?

Don't play the victim blame game with family violence

It's not a woman's job to teach violent men how to behave.

11 truths about having two under two

When I told my mothers? group that my husband and I had started trying for our second baby they told me I was crazy. Now I can see why.

'How do you say goodbye to someone you've only just started to get to know?'

New mum Sarah Sutton was faced with a shattering scenario no person should have to endure.

It's a ... boy! Couple welcomes son number 13

"It's a boy!" That's the phrase Kateri Schwandt has heard in labour delivery ward for the 13th time in her life.

Six reasons to go for a walk

Can't find time to get to the gym? It could be just as beneficial to put your baby in the stroller and go for a walk.

Seven questions you should be asking about your health cover

If the last time you assessed your health cover was five years ago, there?s a chance it may no longer suit your needs. To ensure it?s still right for your family, click here for seven questions to ask.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

How to use gas effectively in labour

Many women in labour don't use gas effectively and suffer more side effects than benefits. Here's how to get the most out of this pain relief option.

'He has gastro but that's okay, right?': sick kid etiquette

We cannot place all children who are sick in a bubble till they recover, but we can give other parents a choice about exposing their kids to them.

Ada Nicodemou: 'I can never be completely happy again'

Home and Away actress Ada Nicodemou has opened up about the loss of her stillborn baby.

10 things to consider when you're thinking about trying for a baby

Before you start tracking your menstrual cycle and reading up on the best positions to get pregnant, there are a few other things you may want to consider.

How special surgery and IVF can create a post-vasectomy baby

Cricket legend Glenn McGrath and his second wife Sara are expecting their first child together, thanks to IVF and a delicate surgical sperm retrieval process that helped the couple to conceive.

Belle Gibson's mother 'disgusted and embarrassed'

The mother of disgraced wellness blogger Belle Gibson has accused her daughter of lying about her childhood in an attempt to garner public sympathy.

Doctor's mobile phone 'left inside c-section mum'

A new mum claims a doctor left his mobile phone inside her after delivering her baby via caesarean section.

I'm a mum and I'm following my dreams

I want my kids to know that no matter what happens in life, you can still be who it is that you've always wanted to be.

Those first daycare days

I had this innate 'mum' moment the other day.

'If one person had listened, my life would have been so different'

Katherine's father will die in prison for the horrifying sexual abuse of his daughter. Yet she is the one with the true life sentence.

This new plan undermines breastfeeding and baby health at everyone's expense

Mothers, babies, the health system and the wider society are going to pay the price of this new budget.

Couple to celebrate terminally ill baby's birthday in unique way

Baby Jai Bishop has lived at Starship Hospital for the past seven months, with his parents flying back and forth from Hokitika, 1100km away, to be by his side.

Life On Mars

It's men who need 'retraining', not women

We are all responsible for our own behaviour. Telling victims to harden up is wrong.

Baby Gammy's dad tries to claim charity money

The biological father of baby Gammy has reportedly tried to access charity money raised for the little boy's medical costs.

Where are the childcare places?

It?s all very well to encourage women to work if they choose to, but how can the measures lead to increased workforce participation when women are once again left holding the baby?

The pain of not having babies and not knowing why

After seven years of wishing, hoping, crying, punching pillows and shouting "why me?!", the end result is more than I ever thought possible.

Getting your family finances in order

Whether you're after a new car for a growing family, a bigger house, or are just fixing up your finances, here are the basics on borrowing.

Mum shares graphic selfie to warn against tanning

A mum has shared a graphic photo of her skin cancer treatment as a warning to others.

Does parenthood make us happier?

We can certainly gain higher levels of happiness when we become parents, but the trick is to not get overwhelmed by the pressures of raising our kids.

No, having a dog is not like having a human child

It's obvious these people dote on their pets, but they're barking up the wrong tree.

 

Top baby names

Baby Names

The numbers are in and we can now bring you the 2014 top baby name list for Australia.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.