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7 month old - I'm not coping UPDATED #59


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#1 Moo point

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:16 AM

I’m not sure where I’m going with this, so I apologise in advance for waffling.

I am really struggling. My DS is an adorable, energetic bundle of joy – to everyone else. I am feeling nothing but anxiety, resentment and frustration, and I don’t know why. I’ve never been the most patient person, and I did wonder how motherhood would affect me, but I can’t seem to find any joy when I was told that things get easier from 6 months. I actually found the constant baby attachment in the first few months easier (maybe because DS was less mobile, less grizzly and it was only for a short time).

DS sleeps through the night, has done from around 4 months – down by around 8.30pm, one wake up for a feed between 4 and 6am, and back to sleep until 7/8am. He is fully breastfed, plus started on some solids at 5.5 months. The thing is, he has never figured out how to drink from a bottle, and has only recently started being able to drink from a sippy cup, so he has been tied to me since birth. I was excited to be able to breastfeed, and would be quite happy to keep doing so, except that even at 7 months he is still feeding so frequently. Yesterday was insane – I spent half the day on the couch with him attached to me, he fed roughly every 1.5 hours, and refused solids the last couple of days (not that he eats more than a tablespoon twice a day anyway). He hasn’t put on any weight in a month, but has started commando crawling, has 3 teeth, is more vocal, is pulling himself to sit up, so I just assume his nutrition is going toward these and I am taking him to the GP next week to check.

But the resentment I am feeling at being tied to him is building. And when he won’t eat solids, or more rightly when he throws it on the floor, it makes me angry. I know it’s not his fault, but so many little things are getting to me. The food refusal (and it’s not what I’m making, he doesn’t even want to taste anything), the constant rolling over when trying to change him, the pinching/hitting/eye gouging when holding him, the distracted breastfeeding, the taking 2 hours to feed and go to bed of a night time, the 40 minute catnaps, the mess of vomit, milk, food and drool – I’m so over it. And when he is being cute, and playful, and learning new things, I feel so guilty for having felt bad in the first place. On more than one occasion I’ve been reduced to tears simply because he is grizzling, and commando crawling toward me demanding to be picked up. The instinctive need he has for me is overwhelming.

I am going back to work part time in March, working from home with either mum or the inlaws looking after him but I’ll be there to feed him. DH has expressed a desire to have him for a day on his own, more than once, but that has been impossible with DS not taking a bottle. Now that he’ll drink from a sippy cup that is one less issue. However, DH still wants him to have breastmilk and I have been expressing, but I hate it. It’s messy, it’s time consuming, and even if I go out and leave DS with DH, I’d need to come home to express for comfort (I’m not carrying a pump around the shops). I’ve suggested formula for daytimes and I’ll still breastfeed morning, night and overnight if required. But DH would prefer DS breastfeed in some form until he’s two sad.gif And frankly when DH told me this today I burst into hyperventilating tears – I feel so trapped. DH is certainly on my side, he knows how much I’ve been struggling and is a wonderful support, he’s just expressing his preference for DS to have breastmilk. We gave DS a little taste of formula the other day (I bought some in case of emergency) and he happily drank 20 ml.

I don’t know what to do. Is it possible to formula feed during the day and breastfeed morning and night, without my supply dropping off? I’ve always had oversupply, and can hand pump pretty easily, I’d just prefer not to. And how can I convince DH that it's ok?

Edited by ange_75, 05 February 2013 - 02:57 PM.


#2 Guest_divineM_*

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:25 AM

OP- you have my sympathies, I was diagnosed with PND when DD was 4 months old (she's nearly 2 now) and have had many struggles in my motherhood journey. Firstly, don't listent o people telling you "when it gets easier". I did and it got me into trouible feeling disappointed when things were not easy at "designated times". Secondly, looking after young children is very, very hard work and other people eg granparents find them joyful and delightful but  they are not there day and night the way you are and are not feeling the burden of responsibility you feel. Going back to work will help you - it did help me. Have you been assessed for PND? All the best.

#3 erindiv

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:28 AM

Your post screams PND to me and I'd know, I had it twice.

You need to see a GP and get yourself assessed. Trust me, it doesn't go away. It builds and builds and before you know it you can barely function.

#4 jdevine

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:35 AM

OP, I can relate with a lot of what you are saying!

I think it is absolutely vital that you get some time to yourself! I agree with divineM that perhaps PND is going on here. If it is just getting that acknowladged and treatment happening along with some time out will make the world of difference.

Regarding giving formula during the day, that has not been a problem for anyone that I know. I think it is probably quite common with mums keeping up that morning and/or night bf and replacing the others with formula. Your body will respond accordingly and will not make milk at the times you give the bottle but should still produce when he is feeding. Your DH really should support you on this as a happy mum is the most important thing.

A wise person once asked me if my baby was thriving. So long as they are thriving it doesnt matter how you get there. That has been a comfort for me many, many times.

Hang in there and good luck.


#5 CharliMarley

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:36 AM

I think you need to go and have a talk with your GP, as you could be on the cusp of depression. Your baby is probably drinking a lot from you, because it has been hot weather and the first part of breastmilk is a thirst quencher and he needs this. You could have a break by getting someone to look after your baby and he can have your breastmilk from a sippy cup and even newborns are able to take breastmilk from open cups or large syringes.

#6 Ice Queen

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:47 AM

Firstly, they are your breasts not your DH's.  Happy mum = happy baby and if that means a bottle of formula here and there so be it.  Both my bubs were having bottles of formula by that age and it didnt affect my supply.  My supply was affected once they took solids but they werent feeding as frequently so it was to be expected.  You can reduce your number of feeds but still have breastmilk for as long as you want.  You could feed only once a day for the last year and still have milk.

You sound like I was with my DS at this age.  I just persisted with solids and when he finally started eating 3 meals a day you could hear my hoops of joy for miles around.  Some mums can do the constant feeding on demand for up to 12mo but not me.  I am always impressed by the BLW mums on here who patiently persist until their bubs start getting the food in their mouths at around 9mo.  There is no way I could have lasted until then with demand feeding.  I got my bubs into a fairly set eating, feeding and napping routine around this stage and held firm at 4 breastfeeds per day.  That way I stayed sane.  With DS I would have changed to ff had I not done this.  He was so clingy and physical and it was all too much.

I found an eating, napping, feeding routine from......OMG......dare I say it on EB from TH's Save Your Sleep.  Dont worry I didnt follow anything else, I actually picked it up in a bookshop and memorised the routine and I worked with it loosely and found it great.  I didnt follow it to the minute and of course there are days it goes haywire but you can cope with a day here and there.

With regards to solids is your mum supportive and helpful? Your MIL? I suspect he isnt taking from you as he would prefer your lovely warm breasts!!  Can someone come for a few days and help you out.  You go for a walk and she tries?  Remove the breast factor.  Try giving him a small breastfeed then wait maybe 30mins and try?  Dont let him get too hungry as he will get a bit hysterical.  Put some finger food on the tray to distract while you do a few spoons.

Also when he constantly wants to be held what about a walk in the pram?  Then you are not physically holding him but he is distracted.  Go to the park and play on the grass.  You cant get anything done anyway.  Some of the clinginess might be boredom.  They turn into busy creatures very quickly.

Good luck.  My DS has been a challenge too!

#7 melodypond

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:55 AM

What sort of pump do you have - I see you say hand pump, do you mean you do it by hand or a manual pump?  

If your husband (and you!) would like your baby to have breastmilk till 2, you should probably look at investing in a good double electric pump.  I was undersupplied and used it to help build supply and also so I could have a break (mine were both looooong feeders, minimum around an hour - mostly longer though!).  While its of course messier than straight up breastfeeding I wouldn't consider it messy when compared to formula feeding.  It was also usually only 10 - 15 mins for me - if you have a great supply you will probably find it much quicker!!

I think you should look into the pump if feeding breastmilk is important to you.  However, I would like to say that there is nothing wrong with formula if you can't pump for whatever reason.  Both mine have done really well on it.  

I see others have mentioned PND and while you should definitely speak to your GP about it, I really dont think there is anything wrong with the way you feel at the moment given your circumstances - I do completely understand feeling tethered to my child because they fed so long and I did start to resent it.  He was also an incredibly poor sleeper and very early crawling and walking - so I just never stopped!   I think some babies are just much higher maintenance than others and that is always going to be overwhelming and I think you are just begging for some ME time!

Regarding your supply - I cant help there, I did think there was a point when your supply stabilises but I am not sure how dropping day feeds completely would affect that?  The ladies on the breastfeeding forum would be able to answer :-)

#8 Beancat

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:57 AM

OP, massive sympathy here for you.  Again as PP said your post absolutely screams PND to me. I have had it, it feels like every little think is going to drive you mad.  I love my babies but 6 months ago hated my situation.  Wtih medication and counselling and support fom DP, my MCHN and my fantastic GP I am now through the other side AND expecting my next baby.

You need an action plan and you need it now.  Make an appointment to see your GP immediately.  Try and get in today if you can.  If you are in vic you can also get access to an elevated level of MCHN that will visit  your home.  This is organised through your normal MCHN.

Some advice.  It is NOT normal to feel like this, but it can be managed......you will get through this.

It doesnt matter what DH thinks about the BFing - its not his issue.  Do what you need to do for you and your relationship with your baby.  

The constant feeding would drive me mad too.  For mental and physical health reasons I am not BFing no 3.  some women do not cope well with the attatchment (i am one of these women).  Do not feel guilty about this, but do something about it to improve your mental state, ie wean if you need to.  you made need the assistance of your MCHN and or a lactation consultant to get your baby to take a bottle.

Going to work is a good idea, but can you not do it from home?  It sounds like you need a proper line drawn between home and work and if you are at home you may feel guilty a about not spending time with your baby.

yes you can formula feed during the day and BF at night andmorning - a lactation consultant can help you with this.

PND is frightening and isolating.  You have taken the first step by reaching out on EB.  Now go and get some support asap.  You can also call PANDA and they can put you in contact with referal agencies.  Please PM me if you need to, you are not alone

Edited by Beancat, 31 January 2013 - 09:58 AM.


#9 lucky 2

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:58 AM

Sorry to hear you are having a hard time.
I was diagnosed with PND at 6 months, it isn't uncommon so as pp's say, I think you need to let your GP and ? CHN know ASAP. You need something extra for you.
The link below has lots of information about alternative ways of giving milk to a breast fed baby, including but not restricted to bottles.
http://kellymom.com/bf/pumpingmoms/feeding...native-feeding/
Lots of baby wont take a bottle, it's foreign to them and they know how to breast fed, they don't see the point! So it's not that he hasn't learned, he is rejecting it.
The link above also has tips to help get baby to take a bottle but since he is over 6 months it might be better to use other alternatives for water, ebm or formula, if you start on bottles it could interfere with extended bfing (that's if you do end up wanting to do this), even if it is twice a day and you would end up having to make up bottles, extra work if you can avoid it, having a baby/toddler who will drink from a cup is great!
I could imagine you'd think "shouldn't it be better now?", shouldn't I be able to get away from him for a bit of time?
You are really close even if it isn't now, every week he gets a bit older and able to take more "other food".
You will get there and so will he but if I could reassure you that it's understandable that it's not happening at 7.5months, but it will.
Some babies take longer to establish on solids than others.
I reckon talk to you chn about solids etc, do you have a good relationship with her?
That's all I can think of at the moment, there are a lot of issues raised in your post, maybe some of us will respond to some and hopefully all.
You are not alone, this is not uncommon and mums sometimes need to be mothered iykwim?
All the best.

#10 Ice Queen

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:12 AM

QUOTE (Beancat @ 31/01/2013, 07:57 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Some advice.  It is NOT normal to feel like this, but it can be managed......you will get through this..


Actually I disagree with this.  Why?  Because it is EXACTLY how I felt with DS at this stage.  Some of us are just not touchy, feelly, physical people and constant breastfeeding on demand for 7mo does your head in if you are like this.  I am also not an overly patient person so I can relate.  It is possible to feel like this and not have PND.  I didn't, not even close.  I had mild PND with DD (who was a dream baby, go figure...) so I know how it feels.  Some babies are just harder and you dont have to have PND to struggle.  As soon as I cut DS to 4 feeds a day and had him on a good routine, I was a changed person.

I am not disputing that the OP may have PND and I agree it is worth a GP visit.  But I also disagree with jumping to the conclusion that it always PND when a mum doesn't cope.  Sometimes a few changes to the baby's routine can make a world of difference.

Edited by Ehill, 31 January 2013 - 10:13 AM.


#11 password123

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:12 AM

Tell your DH to back off. It is you and only who decides how long to breastfeed if it is causing you mental anguish.
I agree with PP and recommend you see your gp.
I have days like you describe - my DD has become a nightmare over the last few weeks and all I want to do is leave her with her dad and have some time to myself! I'm hoping it is a temporary thing! I laughed at thru commado crawl to be picked up thing - that happens here too and I know i should be thinking "how cute", I'm thinking "argh! Get lost for five minutes!".


#12 Tesseract

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:13 AM

I've been doing 2-3 breastfeeds a day for nearly a year now (DD is nearly 2), so it certainly is possible! Your supply doesn't disappear, it just reduces because demand reduces.

I also felt so trapped when DD was feeding constantly, it is an awful feeling.

As the others have said, please speak to someone if you are feeling too overwhelmed. I'm not saying nothing else is going on, but to be honest with you, it sounds like you and your DS are bored. The monotony of feed, clean, settle, feed, clean, settle etc is nauseating.

When I was at home full time with the boobie monster I basically had to do something every day or I would be very unhappy by the time DH got home. I would either have a friend or mum around, or we'd go visit someone, or I'd just take DD to the park for a picnic (less cleaning up!). Other people and other places distracted and stimulated her, and gave me a break from the monotony.

I think working will help things. I have done the working from home with others caring for DD. It was good, but might I suggest that if possible you shut yourself up in the office, or even go to a cafe with a laptop - when DD knew I was there she was at me constantly.

Just on the food thing, if he's refusing being fed have you tried finger foods? A baby can quite happily play with finger foods for at least half an hour so it's a great distraction! Also some prefer it so they eat more. While it is messy as well, picking up a few pieces of toast off the floor is better than scrubbing pumpkin puree off the walls.

#13 password123

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:14 AM



QUOTE (Ehill @ 31/01/2013, 11:12 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Actually I disagree with this.  Why?  Because it is EXACTLY how I felt with DS at this stage.  Some of us are just not touchy, feelly, physical people and constant breastfeeding on demand for 7mo does your head in if you are like this.  i am also not an overly patient person so I can relate.  It is possible to feel like this and not have PND.  I didn't, not even close.  I had mild PND with DD (who was a dream baby, go figure...) so I know how it feels.  Some babies are just harder and you dont have to have PND to struggle.  As soon as I cut DS to 4 feeds a day and had him on a good routine, I was a changed person.

I am not disputing that the OP may have PND and I agree it is worth a GP visit.  But I also disagree with jumping to conclusion that it always PND when a mum doesn't cope.  Sometimes a few changes to the baby's routine can make a world of difference.


I also agree with this, but only saw it after posting.
Gp visit is a good idea to check if you meet other criteria for pnd.

Edited by Mrs_Snorks, 31 January 2013 - 10:16 AM.


#14 Beancat

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:22 AM

QUOTE (Ehill @ 31/01/2013, 11:12 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Actually I disagree with this.  Why?  Because it is EXACTLY how I felt with DS at this stage.  Some of us are just not touchy, feelly, physical people and constant breastfeeding on demand for 7mo does your head in if you are like this.  I am also not an overly patient person so I can relate.  It is possible to feel like this and not have PND.  I didn't, not even close.  I had mild PND with DD (who was a dream baby, go figure...) so I know how it feels.  Some babies are just harder and you dont have to have PND to struggle.  As soon as I cut DS to 4 feeds a day and had him on a good routine, I was a changed person.

I am not disputing that the OP may have PND and I agree it is worth a GP visit.  But I also disagree with jumping to the conclusion that it always PND when a mum doesn't cope.  Sometimes a few changes to the baby's routine can make a world of difference.


Ehill we may have to agree to disagree.  While it is normal to feel frustrated and struggle is it NOT normal to not cope.  The OP is crying out for help here.  Telling her that this is normal will only compound the problem.  She may not have PND, that is up to a profesisonal to diagnose, she she doesnt have to struggle through this period trying to me some sort of martyr for her baby.  Implying this feeling is normal is damn well dangerous.  We don't know what it has taken her to take this first step and reach out for help.  She needs professional help and support and it is out there to be had.

Edited by Beancat, 31 January 2013 - 10:27 AM.


#15 witchesforest

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:26 AM

don't worry, my daughter didn't want a bar of solids until 10 months. it can be draining but they get there in the end. and you're right, it sounds like your little one is just having huge developmental leaps and that's where all the energy is going.

agree to get yourself assessed with the GP for PND.

i went back to work at 10 months FT with my first and freaked out that i would have to pump all day. turned out that although she liked feeding, she didn't care either way about the substance. all my carefully expressed bottles were ignored in favour of mushy apple etc. she still fed fine in the mornings and evenings.

your boobs will adjust, although DO be careful of mastitis during the transition. you may need to express a bit at first just to avoid milk build up. i think i did this for about 2 weeks before my boobs got with the program - after that we BFed happily until 26 months with just a morning and evening feed.

#16 Tobias'smum

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:31 AM

As pp said see your dr re PND.


I stopped breast feeding at 6 months DS had started solids but was always hungry - i switched to formula and he loved it  i know the benifits of breast milk but if you are exhuasted all the time  and starting to resent it in any way  i think the cons out weigh the pros .

A week after i started formula we were all so much happier - DS was full and i felt like i was more than a feeding device. When i talk to my Dr about how much formula DS was drinking even with food he said said no wonder I was tired /exhuasted.

If we have another child I think i will try to breastfeed but if my mental health is at risk i will go to formula because it was right for me


So OP please see your GP and also know that you are not alone and it can get better

all the best



#17 More than a Mother

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:36 AM

I have nothing to add to the posts, but wanted to give you a  bbighug.gif. My son is now four, and reading your post brought back to me how horrible I found motherhood for the first year.  

I regret that I didn't get help, in whatever form I needed. Only now do I feel that I could manage another child, but it's too late.

Please get some help.

#18 erindiv

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:39 AM

QUOTE (Beancat @ 31/01/2013, 11:22 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Implying this feeling is normal is damn well dangerous.


THIS.

It is normal to feel overwhelmed, exhausted and run down.

It is NOT normal to feel like you can't cope, you can't take it anymore, you're going crazy, to spend every day feeling like you're in a black hole.

I struggled for two months after having DD with people telling me "It gets better, you'll feel better soon, it's just hormones, babies are hard work," and so on. I ended up having a complete breakdown which I have never completely recovered from. I firmly believe that if I had sought help sooner and not cared so much about looking like a 'sook', that could have been prevented.

Even if the OP does not have PND, she needs help of some kind. She at least needs to be assessed. Whether or not it's PND that is for a doctor to decide.

#19 Fright bat

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:42 AM

Oh, lets all stop trying to diagnose the poor woman.

I don't think how she feels should be written off as 'normal', nor do I think it 'screams PND'.

OP, 7 months is a crabby age. Your babies ability to nag and whine at this age drives many mothers mad.

You are up for big changes soon though. In the next few months, your baby will get HEAPS better at eating and HEAPS better at drinking from a sippy cup. Hold on there, give it six weeks... it will start to get easier in terms of feeding/being away.

Have a look at the "Wonder Weeks" app - it'll give you an idea of why your baby is likely behaving as they are... once he gets past this stage, it DOES get easier.

Yes, you can breastfeed morning and night and give other foods/milks during the day. Sure sure, before 1, foods for fun... my now 10 month old was intolerant of cows milk formula and wouldn't touch the soy formula (and who can blame him, vile stuff). So he had morning and night breast feeds with soy milk/almond milk/quinoa milk in the day, and is now fully weaned as I go back to work next week. He eats solids like a champ (it got heaps easier from about eight months) and is gaining weight and healthy. This decision was made in conjunction with a paed, for anyone who gets upset by it. He has really only gotten good with the sippy cup in the last month, but otherwise DH fed him solids when I was out (plain yogurt, or a banana, or stewed pears were always winners).

Go see your GP.... but don't get too worked up about whether or not you have a 'diagnosis'. Only a GP can work that out. In the meantime, try and have a break from him!

(and I agree that 6-12 months is hard!)

#20 feralisles

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:46 AM

Another one here who doesn't agree that there must be something wrong with you if you feel this way.  For those of us who like our own time and space, the incessant demands of small babies can be almost intolerable.  I can relate to everything you say OP!  It did get better, but for me not until mine reached the toddler stage...
Getting out helped a lot.  I used to put mine in the pram or backpack and walk, walk walk...   They liked checking out the world, and the exercise helped clear my head.  Sometimes I would have a walking buddy for companionship, sometimes it was just me and bub but either way it was better than being trapped inside all day.
I agree with the PP's that it is up to you, not your DH, as to how you manage breastfeeding.  You've done a great job getting this far, and now that your baby is older you don't have to be the sole source of nutrition.  If he can take formula from a sippy cup, that will allow your DH the one on one time he has been looking forward to, and will give you a well earned break.  Having some time out to look forward to makes it all more bearable!
And for what it is worth, I don't think your feelings make you a bad mum.  After all, what other job would expect you to be available 24/7, with no days off or sick leave, for months or years on end without ever feeling burnt out?

#21 Beancat

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:47 AM

Well said Erindiv, it never hurts to seek help, but it can hurt to not seek it.  Too many people in your ear saying this is all normal and it gets better does not help, it only makes you feel more useless as a mother because they are all coping and you are in the biggest darkest hole and you cannot find a way out.

Erindiv, I am sorry about your experience

#22 lucky 2

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:52 AM

QUOTE
For those of us who like our own time and space, the incessant demands of small babies can be almost intolerable.

Yes, I really think this is what did my head in.

As for the disagreements as to what is going on for the OP (sorry we are fighting over you ange), we all want to help and so many of us relate to what you are going through and we will have our own personal take on it.
But we are all posting because we feel for you and want to help. x

#23 Goggie

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:54 AM

DS is only 5 months so I don't have any advice for you, just lots of love and hugs. I can totally relate to your post. The relentlessness of this age, the clinginess where all they want all day is you you you...the constant battle of sleep, the distracted feeding and tugging at hair, nose, scratches etc... I understand where you are. I really hope it gets better very soon for you xoxoxo

#24 steppy

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:57 AM

I can't imagine my partner telling me he wanted our child breastfed for 2 years. I get where he is coming from and it is his child too, but seriously I'd just have to reply "Well, you can do that if you want. I am actually going to reduce breastfeeding now though."

Don't really see what he can do about it? Can you still hire a wet nurse?

#25 Ice Queen

Posted 31 January 2013 - 11:11 AM

QUOTE (lucky 2 @ 31/01/2013, 09:52 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
As for the disagreements as to what is going on for the OP (sorry we are fighting over you ange), we all want to help and so many of us relate to what you are going through and we will have our own personal take on it.
But we are all posting because we feel for you and want to help. x


Not 'fighting' just offering alternative points of view, I like to think!  I think it's good for the OP and any new mum to read through everyones experiences and struggles and apply it to her own situation.  Maybe the PND is relevant, maybe its not, at least the OP now has a starting point if that is the issue.  Maybe it is just the relentless feeding, again at least the OP has some practical advice on how to deal with it.  Maybe its a combo of both, again I hope the combo of all our experiences and advice can help.

We are all different in what we do and don't cope with and our babies are all little individuals. That is what is great about EB.  SOMEONE out there has felt exactly how you are feeling.  Sometimes that knowledge is enough to make us feel that little bit better.

Edited to add, I think we can all agree that we think you need to wear earplugs to what your DH is saying!  Thank god I didnt have to deal with that in the midst of it all.

Edited by Ehill, 31 January 2013 - 11:12 AM.





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Baby Jai Bishop has lived at Starship Hospital for the past seven months, with his parents flying back and forth from Hokitika, 1100km away, to be by his side.

This new plan undermines breastfeeding and baby health at everyone's expense

Mothers, babies, the health system and the wider society are going to pay the price of this new budget.

Trying to understand why your baby is upset

Working out what?s underlying your baby's fussiness can be a case of trial and error. Here are a few common causes and how you can remedy each one.

When those you love judge your parenting

In today's society, never has it been harder to parent without judgment. But what about when judgment is coming from closer to home?

Don't play the victim blame game with family violence

It's not a woman's job to teach violent men how to behave.

11 truths about having two under two

When I told my mothers? group that my husband and I had started trying for our second baby they told me I was crazy. Now I can see why.

'How do you say goodbye to someone you've only just started to get to know?'

New mum Sarah Sutton was faced with a shattering scenario no person should have to endure.

It's a ... boy! Couple welcomes son number 13

"It's a boy!" That's the phrase Kateri Schwandt has heard in labour delivery ward for the 13th time in her life.

Six reasons to go for a walk

Can't find time to get to the gym? It could be just as beneficial to put your baby in the stroller and go for a walk.

Seven questions you should be asking about your health cover

If the last time you assessed your health cover was five years ago, there?s a chance it may no longer suit your needs. To ensure it?s still right for your family, click here for seven questions to ask.

 
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What's hot on EB

Where are the childcare places?

It?s all very well to encourage women to work if they choose to, but how can the measures lead to increased workforce participation when women are once again left holding the baby?

The pain of not having babies and not knowing why

After seven years of wishing, hoping, crying, punching pillows and shouting "why me?!", the end result is more than I ever thought possible.

Getting your family finances in order

Whether you're after a new car for a growing family, a bigger house, or are just fixing up your finances, here are the basics on borrowing.

Mum shares graphic selfie to warn against tanning

A mum has shared a graphic photo of her skin cancer treatment as a warning to others.

Does parenthood make us happier?

We can certainly gain higher levels of happiness when we become parents, but the trick is to not get overwhelmed by the pressures of raising our kids.

No, having a dog is not like having a human child

It's obvious these people dote on their pets, but they're barking up the wrong tree.

Toddler styling

Seven things my toddler taught me about my home

My standards at home were never that high but having a two-year-old has taught me to be cool with chaos.

Australia's top baby names of 2014

The numbers have been crunched and it's official: Australian parents are having a bit of an 'O' moment.

How to set up the perfect nursery for your baby

You'll soon be meeting your baby, but you've got one big task to get done first: setting up a comfy, calming nursery you'll both be able to enjoy.

Childcare rebate: tougher rules for stay-at-home mums

A new form of activity testing will be introduced to ensure the highest subsidies go to parents who contribute the most to the workforce.

The women who desperately need more support in pregnancy

For women suffering from chronic morning sickness or hyperemesis gravidarum, pregnancy can be the roller coaster from hell.

When labour doesn't happen and you're induced

I never actually went into labour - so by 42 weeks I was booked in for induction.

Mum's grief for triplets inspires change

The death of Sophie Smith's triplet baby boys has motivated the half-marathon mother and her team to raise $1.25 million for charity.

The best advice for treating head lice

Just like a horror movie ... THEY'RE BAAAAAACK. So what works in treating and avoiding head lice and nits?

Overdue and over it

A watched womb never labours ... or at least mine didn't.

Parenting an early walker

Watching your child take their first wobbly steps is one of the best parenting highs you'll ever experience. But with that high comes a new reality.

Baby-led weaning worked for us

My baby wasn't interested in food - until we tried something new. Now she's eating it all, and it often comes from my plate.

'Paralysed bride' becomes a mum

Rachelle Friedman Chapman was preparing to marry the man of her dreams when tragedy struck four years ago.

 

Top baby names

Baby Names

The numbers are in and we can now bring you the 2014 top baby name list for Australia.

 
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