Jump to content

Asking someone else to assist in TT your child?

  • Please log in to reply
20 replies to this topic

#1 EssentialBludger

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:44 PM

Need some advice on what to do here.

My boss rang me up and asked me to do 2 full days work tomorrow and Friday. She knew I wouldn't have a babysitter so organised her 17yo DD to look after my kids in exchange for me signing off on her community service hours. They have stayed with we before and all was fine.

However this time we are in the early days of TT. He's going OK, but still needs to be told (not asked) to go to the toilet, and still has a fair few accidents.

Is it reasonable to expect this of a 17yo? Especially as I'm not paying her? I don't really want to put him back in nappies and confuse him, but TT is gross when it's your own child, let alone someone elses!

Any advice appreciated!!

#2 Feral*Spikey*

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:46 PM

Ask her. Some people will mind, some won't give a patootie.

If she agrees, set out a plan for her to follow, and have lots of spares plus baggies for dealing with any potential mistakes.

#3 luke's mummu

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:47 PM

Does eh have any experience at all with kids ? If she doesn't  then No I probably wouldn't. I would put hi in nappies and have written instructions of how often his nappy has to be changed.

#4 erindiv

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:50 PM

At 17 I wouldn't have minded. I'd as her just to be sure. Then if she did do it I'd give her a little something nice at the end of the day - a bit of money, or some chocolates or something.

#5 mibi

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:52 PM

It would depend on how far along you are with the TT. I would probably put him in pull-ups with instructions on how often to ask or take to toilet. I think it would be wise to ask if the girl was comfortable with it also.

#6 mini mac

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:53 PM

Depends on the person. Just ask and you will get your answer.

If she said yes, a little present to say thanks, no matter how successful your child is, wouldn't go astray

#7 EssentialBludger

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:55 PM

I will ask her, but from experience she is very shy and polite and will tell me something is OK even if it's not. That's why I wanted some general opinions on if it would be horrible off not.

#8 **Xena**

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:57 PM

I'd ask and as a PP said, buy her a little something as an extra thanks.

#9 ekbaby

Posted 30 January 2013 - 03:01 PM

Is there likely to be a poo accident? Wee accidents I think most ppl can handle, poo is just for some special people. A friend offered to take DS for a kid-only play date when he was TT but I didn't feel right about the possibility of her having to clean him up- also just that I knew DSs signals/rhythms better, and I didn't want him to feel embarrassed or have a negative experience that might affect TT. My friend was lovely and said it wouldn't bother her at all. It was only during that first week that I was like that- when we were mostly staying close to home, thinking about all outings etc- he trained pretty quick. But during that first week I tried to focus on it and have a pretty regular boring week. Daycare staff I think are different be Suse they are used to doing it and are part of the child's usual circle of carers.

#10 erindiv

Posted 30 January 2013 - 03:06 PM

If she's the shy type then pull ups might be a good idea.

Even I hated the poo accidents sick.gif

#11 laridae

Posted 30 January 2013 - 03:06 PM

I don't think toilet training is any worse than changing nappies.  If you are worried put him in pullups or padded undies.

#12 Riotproof

Posted 30 January 2013 - 03:16 PM

QUOTE (laridae @ 30/01/2013, 04:06 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I don't think toilet training is any worse than changing nappies.

I think just give her the toilet times, and how to react to an accident. Even poo accidents undies are easier than nappies. And yes buy Her a pressie.

#13 Greatmum

Posted 30 January 2013 - 07:39 PM

I am sure no 17 yr old would want to TT a child not their own.  Nappies would be waaaay easier.  How is TT easier it is lovely scraping the poo off the undies or picking the poo up off the floor.

#14 Feral-as-Meggs

Posted 30 January 2013 - 08:07 PM

I have a different opinion - she's essentially nannying for you - 2 full days is more than babysitting.   I'd only not go ahead if you think it might upset your child.

#15 EssentialBludger

Posted 30 January 2013 - 08:53 PM

I find nappies much easier than TT, so I assumed most people did lol.

I just think putting him back in nappies for two full days would be so confusing to him, and we have worked so hard to get this far. He's 3.5, and up until 2 weeks ago, wouldn't go anywhere near the toilet.

Probably should have just said no to working.

#16 laridae

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:50 PM

QUOTE (Greatmum @ 30/01/2013, 08:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I am sure no 17 yr old would want to TT a child not their own.  Nappies would be waaaay easier.  How is TT easier it is lovely scraping the poo off the undies or picking the poo up off the floor.

I wiped one poo off the floor in the whole time I TT DD, and that was only half a poo, she didn't quite get to the potty on time, but finished off on it.  She took herself to the potty ok after that.  We had a few streaks on the undies - mainly from pulling up without wiping, and one or 2 in the undies.  Not really any different from poos in nappies (cloth nappies...)

Nappies however, I often cleaned up poo running down the leg.

TT was way easier...

#17 Holidayromp

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:22 PM

At the end of the day you have been called in at work your son needs to stay on the right track with toilet training especially if it is going well.  The last thing you would do is put him back into nappies and undo all the hard work.

The 17yo is doing you a favour and you are doing the 17yo a favour and you are working at short notice so you are just going to have to explain straight up that you are in the process of toilet training and this is what needs to be done.

If you were not happy about it or worried you should have mentioned to your boss that your son is in the process of being toilet trained and there maybe accidents would her daughter be okay with that?  If not then you have no other option to stay at home given the fact you have been given very short notice to work.

Staying on track with toilet training is far more important than any job otherwise you are going to undo all the good things your son has done and your work getting him to that point not to mention confuse the hell out of the kid if he has to regress back to nappies due to no fault of his own.

#18 Escapin

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:30 PM

I'd be more worried about the 17yo not cleaning up very well. I'd be leaving very clear instructions re floor/clothes/kid/couch in case of poo. TBH, she'll probably ask him every 5 minutes to avoid having to deal with any accidents.

#19 iwanttosleepin

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:27 PM

i sent my DS1 with my sister's boyfriend (now husband) for a day not long after he was toilet trained.  I was kinda in a rush when I left him too and may have forgot the nitty gritty details of dealing with a just 2 year old in undies.

They handled it just fine.  only one accident all day! I had packed heaps of spare clothes and stuff.

My DS was very very verbal and would have been able to explain the situation very well though....

#20 umop-apisdn

Posted 31 January 2013 - 11:15 PM

Ask your boss to check how their daughter would feel about dealing with toilet training.

If she is comfortable with it, provide gloves, plenty of wipes and bags for wet/soiled clothes. Any dirty clothing can be bagged up for you to deal with.

#21 EssentialBludger

Posted 31 January 2013 - 11:22 PM

all was good, he didn't have a single accident. biggrin.gif

1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users


Newborn baby found in a nativity scene

Police are trying to trace a woman who abandoned a baby boy in the manger of a church nativity scene.

Life would be harder without my kids

The Humans of New York Facebook page is well known for sharing touching, real stories from one of the world's biggest cities – and it's just hit the heart of parents everywhere.

Mum dresses as Wonder Woman for last day of chemo

A Brisbane mum dressed up as a superhero to celebrate the end of her chemotherapy and created a moment her family will remember forever.

How a raisin can predict a toddler's IQ

All you need to assess a child's future intelligence is a plastic cup and a raisin, according to new research.

Former Hi-5 member's cannabis hope

Former Hi-5 star Tim Harding hopes a cannabis-derived drug will help control his daughter's epilepsy, which sees the four-year-old suffering between 50 and 100 seizures a day.

The top 5 reasons your toddler throws a tantrum

Whilst to the outside world little people may appear to have it easy, it's actually not always the case – just ask any toddler who's had their toast cut up the wrong way.

Glenn McGrath thought he'd lost his wife and baby

Australian cricket ledged Glen McGrath has spoken about the moment he thought he might lose his wife, Sara and their baby daughter, Madison.


Inside my Centrelink nightmare

Mother Bec Smith has been trying for months to access Centrelink payments. A "serious error" is preventing her.

Warnings over push for hourly childcare billing

Australia's peak childcare body has called for caution around the Turnbull government's push for childcare centres to charge parents by the hour, not by the day.

Cate Blanchett thought about adopting for years

Cate Blanchett says her recent adoption of a baby girl had nothing to do with wanting a daughter after having three sons.

Kate Walsh: 'I can't have kids'

Grey's Anatomy star Kate Walsh has revealed she is unable to have children because she has experienced early menopause.

The parasite that could boost fertility

The Tsimane women of Bolivia are often revered as among the most fertile in the world - on average having 10 children in their lifetimes -- but some are even more fertile than others.

Family may sue cousin over genetics

A Melbourne couple is suing the Royal Children's Hospital for failing to diagnose a genetic disorder in their first child - an error they allege caused them to have another child with severe disabilities.

Strange things mums have done in labour

While most women in labour focus on the upcoming birth of their baby, some women do more interesting things.

Michael Clarke reveals baby's name

When Michael Clarke said he was wrapped around the finger of his little princess, he wasn't joking.

The logistics of breastfeeding twins

Our life is more or less divided into neat four hour parcels of time and it's hard to get much of anything done in the time between feeds.

How to stop people ruining Christmas

We can make a conscious effort about how we react to those curly Christmas day scenarios that can send us up the wall, or should we say chimney.

Lots of formula offers for desperate mum

The mum who was down to her last three tins of baby formula said she had received hundreds of calls and offers to send her formula.

Surviving breast cancer while pregnant

It was last thing Rebecca O'Donnell expected at 30 weeks' pregnant. One morning, while putting on her bra, she felt a pea-sized lump in her right breast.

Cot sheet brands for the nursery

With so many awesome cot sheet options these days, we thought we'd put together a list of go-to brands for you to seek out for your baby's bed.


What's hot on EB

How I survived breast cancer while pregnant

It was last thing Rebecca O'Donnell expected at 30 weeks' pregnant. One morning, while putting on her bra, she felt a pea-sized lump in her right breast.

Grieving father's letter to Bataclan terrorists: "...this little boy will threaten you by being happy and free"

A grieving father whose wife was killed in the attacks on the Bataclan Theatre last weekend has written an open letter to her killers.

5 challenges of motherhood - and how to see them differently

Despite the smiles, the sloppy kisses and the pure magic children bring to our lives, it's hard to deny that motherhood can be tough.

4 challenges of being a new dad - and how to face them

Becoming a parent is challenging – and that applies to both mums and dads.

My battle against antenatal and postnatal depression

I was five months pregnant when I realised I needed help.

Children swapped at birth will not be returned to biological parents

A boy and girl accidentally swapped on the day they were born will stay with the families who have raised them, a South African court has ruled.

A quarter of men believe they get 'man periods'

A British study has revealed one in four men believe they have a monthly cycle.

Baby deposit

How much do you need to save for a 'baby deposit'?

It's fairly straightforward to calculate a house deposit, but how much money do you need to save up for a baby?

Dad's beautiful note to his wife, a nurse

To anyone else it might just look like a picture of a mum having a nap with her toddler.

'I was a complete schmuck': Mike Baird opens up about his wife's postnatal depression

When his wife Kerryn was not well following the birth of their daughter, NSW Premier Mike Baird buried himself in his work.

Mum's desperate plea as whooping cough alert issued

A desperate mother has shared a heart-breaking video of her baby struggling to cope with a coughing fit caused by pertussis.

Coffee could help you live longer

New US research found people who report drinking three to five cups of coffee a day are less likely to die prematurely from heart disease, suicide, diabetes or Parkinson's disease.

The joy and dread of playdates

To live vicariously through your child is to rediscover anxieties you thought dead and buried.

Sick baby could die without scarce special formula, mum says

Lizzie Cann is down to her last three tins of a special formula in short supply.

Adorable toddler's strop foiled by squeaky shoes

We're probably all familiar with the pouty bottom lip and tightly crossed arms of a tot mid-strop.

More sex during World Cup created more baby boys

More sex during South Africa's World Cup meant a disproportionately high number of boys were born nine months later, a new study has found.

Win one of two ABC Shop prize packs in time for Christmas

What a boon it would be to have your toddler's Christmas gifts covered this year. We have two awesome ABC Shop prize packs to give away to two lucky winners.

Do fitness challenges really work?

Fitness challenges aren't new. There's Michelle Bridges 12WBT and a bunch of other programs if you really want to lose weight.

What are pregnant women Googling?

Pregnancy is a huge change for any woman, so it's natural we'll have questions - and turn to Google to ask them.



Can't decide?

Check out the Essential Baby Names section for some inspiration

Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.