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Asking someone else to assist in TT your child?


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#1 EssentialBludger

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:44 PM

Need some advice on what to do here.

My boss rang me up and asked me to do 2 full days work tomorrow and Friday. She knew I wouldn't have a babysitter so organised her 17yo DD to look after my kids in exchange for me signing off on her community service hours. They have stayed with we before and all was fine.

However this time we are in the early days of TT. He's going OK, but still needs to be told (not asked) to go to the toilet, and still has a fair few accidents.

Is it reasonable to expect this of a 17yo? Especially as I'm not paying her? I don't really want to put him back in nappies and confuse him, but TT is gross when it's your own child, let alone someone elses!

Any advice appreciated!!

#2 Feral*Spikey*

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:46 PM

Ask her. Some people will mind, some won't give a patootie.

If she agrees, set out a plan for her to follow, and have lots of spares plus baggies for dealing with any potential mistakes.

#3 luke's mummu

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:47 PM

Does eh have any experience at all with kids ? If she doesn't  then No I probably wouldn't. I would put hi in nappies and have written instructions of how often his nappy has to be changed.

#4 erindiv

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:50 PM

At 17 I wouldn't have minded. I'd as her just to be sure. Then if she did do it I'd give her a little something nice at the end of the day - a bit of money, or some chocolates or something.

#5 mibi

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:52 PM

It would depend on how far along you are with the TT. I would probably put him in pull-ups with instructions on how often to ask or take to toilet. I think it would be wise to ask if the girl was comfortable with it also.

#6 mini mac

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:53 PM

Depends on the person. Just ask and you will get your answer.

If she said yes, a little present to say thanks, no matter how successful your child is, wouldn't go astray

#7 EssentialBludger

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:55 PM

I will ask her, but from experience she is very shy and polite and will tell me something is OK even if it's not. That's why I wanted some general opinions on if it would be horrible off not.

#8 **Xena**

Posted 30 January 2013 - 02:57 PM

I'd ask and as a PP said, buy her a little something as an extra thanks.

#9 ekbaby

Posted 30 January 2013 - 03:01 PM

Is there likely to be a poo accident? Wee accidents I think most ppl can handle, poo is just for some special people. A friend offered to take DS for a kid-only play date when he was TT but I didn't feel right about the possibility of her having to clean him up- also just that I knew DSs signals/rhythms better, and I didn't want him to feel embarrassed or have a negative experience that might affect TT. My friend was lovely and said it wouldn't bother her at all. It was only during that first week that I was like that- when we were mostly staying close to home, thinking about all outings etc- he trained pretty quick. But during that first week I tried to focus on it and have a pretty regular boring week. Daycare staff I think are different be Suse they are used to doing it and are part of the child's usual circle of carers.



#10 erindiv

Posted 30 January 2013 - 03:06 PM

If she's the shy type then pull ups might be a good idea.

Even I hated the poo accidents sick.gif

#11 laridae

Posted 30 January 2013 - 03:06 PM

I don't think toilet training is any worse than changing nappies.  If you are worried put him in pullups or padded undies.

#12 Riotproof

Posted 30 January 2013 - 03:16 PM

QUOTE (laridae @ 30/01/2013, 04:06 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I don't think toilet training is any worse than changing nappies.

I think just give her the toilet times, and how to react to an accident. Even poo accidents undies are easier than nappies. And yes buy Her a pressie.

#13 Greatmum

Posted 30 January 2013 - 07:39 PM

I am sure no 17 yr old would want to TT a child not their own.  Nappies would be waaaay easier.  How is TT easier it is lovely scraping the poo off the undies or picking the poo up off the floor.

#14 Feral-as-Meggs

Posted 30 January 2013 - 08:07 PM

I have a different opinion - she's essentially nannying for you - 2 full days is more than babysitting.   I'd only not go ahead if you think it might upset your child.

#15 EssentialBludger

Posted 30 January 2013 - 08:53 PM

I find nappies much easier than TT, so I assumed most people did lol.

I just think putting him back in nappies for two full days would be so confusing to him, and we have worked so hard to get this far. He's 3.5, and up until 2 weeks ago, wouldn't go anywhere near the toilet.

Probably should have just said no to working.

#16 laridae

Posted 31 January 2013 - 08:50 PM

QUOTE (Greatmum @ 30/01/2013, 08:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I am sure no 17 yr old would want to TT a child not their own.  Nappies would be waaaay easier.  How is TT easier it is lovely scraping the poo off the undies or picking the poo up off the floor.



I wiped one poo off the floor in the whole time I TT DD, and that was only half a poo, she didn't quite get to the potty on time, but finished off on it.  She took herself to the potty ok after that.  We had a few streaks on the undies - mainly from pulling up without wiping, and one or 2 in the undies.  Not really any different from poos in nappies (cloth nappies...)


Nappies however, I often cleaned up poo running down the leg.



TT was way easier...

#17 Holidayromp

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:22 PM

At the end of the day you have been called in at work your son needs to stay on the right track with toilet training especially if it is going well.  The last thing you would do is put him back into nappies and undo all the hard work.

The 17yo is doing you a favour and you are doing the 17yo a favour and you are working at short notice so you are just going to have to explain straight up that you are in the process of toilet training and this is what needs to be done.

If you were not happy about it or worried you should have mentioned to your boss that your son is in the process of being toilet trained and there maybe accidents would her daughter be okay with that?  If not then you have no other option to stay at home given the fact you have been given very short notice to work.

Staying on track with toilet training is far more important than any job otherwise you are going to undo all the good things your son has done and your work getting him to that point not to mention confuse the hell out of the kid if he has to regress back to nappies due to no fault of his own.

#18 Escapin

Posted 31 January 2013 - 09:30 PM

I'd be more worried about the 17yo not cleaning up very well. I'd be leaving very clear instructions re floor/clothes/kid/couch in case of poo. TBH, she'll probably ask him every 5 minutes to avoid having to deal with any accidents.

#19 iwanttosleepin

Posted 31 January 2013 - 10:27 PM

i sent my DS1 with my sister's boyfriend (now husband) for a day not long after he was toilet trained.  I was kinda in a rush when I left him too and may have forgot the nitty gritty details of dealing with a just 2 year old in undies.

They handled it just fine.  only one accident all day! I had packed heaps of spare clothes and stuff.

My DS was very very verbal and would have been able to explain the situation very well though....

#20 umop-apisdn

Posted 31 January 2013 - 11:15 PM

Ask your boss to check how their daughter would feel about dealing with toilet training.

If she is comfortable with it, provide gloves, plenty of wipes and bags for wet/soiled clothes. Any dirty clothing can be bagged up for you to deal with.

#21 EssentialBludger

Posted 31 January 2013 - 11:22 PM

all was good, he didn't have a single accident. biggrin.gif




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