Jump to content

Do you think kids react to pregnancy?


  • Please log in to reply
5 replies to this topic

#1 madammuck

Posted 27 January 2013 - 09:12 PM

Hi all,

I'm so sorry if there's a better place to post this, I just thought a few of you might be in the same boat at the moment.

DS has just turned 2, and I am 34 weeks pregnant. We've been talking to DS about the baby and reading There's a House in Mummy's Tummy every now and then. He shows interest in and talks about the baby sometimes. We do take it easy with the talk about baby though so that he doesn't get overwhelmed, and by that I mean we don't talk about the baby during every convo with DS.

Over the last few weeks DS has become really clingy, this last week has been awful. I have to do everything for him (to the point where if he drops his drink bottle, I have to pick it up, he won't even pick it up himself). He's not hating DH, but he'd much prefer to be with me (on top of me, being held by me, all over me). He's beautiful and I am being very careful not to take this time for granted, but I'm getting a bit scared of what's to come... how on earth will I cope with DS like this and a new baby who has even more needs?!!

My questions are this:
Is this normal?
Is his clinginess likely because he senses something's happening soon?
How can we make this easier on DS?
Is there anything I absolutely shouldn't do (are there things that can just make the situation worse?)

I guess my hormones are making my mother's guilt much, much worse. I want to do the right thing by him, but at the same time I don't want to get to the point where I feel suffocated.

TIA

#2 Natttmumm

Posted 28 January 2013 - 06:38 AM

My DD 1 was just about 2 when DD2 was born. She did get clingy towards the end but i think that was because I was home from work and she did have more time with just me.
I just did everything for her and tried to enjoy the one on one time. Maybe just let him get that attention for now if you can.
When the baby arrived she had 2 hard days. She wanted everything the baby had and we just let her. E.g bottle, wrap, sit the in the capsule, swing etc. after the two days she got over it and her behaviour went to normal again and she was fine.
Don't stress too much he is still young and will adapt more quickly than older kids. I think it's the advantage of a closer age gap.
My DD2 is 3 now and we are expecting number 3 in a few weeks. I can see the changes in her are more obvious.  She's asking for her cot back which she hasn't been in for a yr, she wants the babies clothes etc. we might be in for an interesting time


#3 Kay1

Posted 28 January 2013 - 07:11 AM

I honestly think at that age they have no idea what is about to happen, not really. They just can't really imagine it, its so far beyond their experience. He may however be picking up on your guilt/emotional/hormonal state (very normal!).

His behaviour could also be just typical twos (molars perhaps?) rather than a reaction to the baby arriving.

One thing I'd say is that if you have talked about you going to the hospital, make sure you explain that you will be coming home again after the baby is born. I realised with DS1 that no one had actually explained that bit to him and that's why he was getting upset at times when we talked about the baby. When I explained that I'd come home again with the baby he was relieved!.

As for what not to do - don't stress "you are the big boy now" type stuff. That might just make it worse. As PP said if he wants to act like a baby at times let him, but when he does big boy things comment on how fun it is that he can do x,y,z now that he is bigger.

The guilt is hard but you are giving him a beautiful gift of a sibling. He may not see it that way for a little while but he will!!

#4 fun_fairz

Posted 28 January 2013 - 07:19 AM

We had the exact same thing with my son. I don't think they can grasp what is happening but they do understand something is going to happen and it's a little scary. I was really worried but in the end he took it all in his stride. He had no problem going to my mums and I actually think he was relieved when he came to the hospital and saw the baby. Once baby was home he went back to his old self.

#5 Soontobegran

Posted 28 January 2013 - 08:36 AM

I think it probably has more to do with the age and the nature of the child than the impending arrival as I think they are really too young to understand the fact that their lives are going to change.
Kay1 I think is right when she says that he may be picking up your anxiety about this change.....which is all normal from you of course.

None of mine ever had a negative reaction following the birth of a sibling but they all went through stages of being clingy and not quite themselves.
I hope all goes well OP, I am sure he will just love his new baby brother or sister.

#6 madammuck

Posted 29 January 2013 - 09:27 AM

Thank you all so much for your replies, they're so helpful.

I absolutely think you're right, he's more than likely picking up on my guilt and anxiety, he does tend to reflect my moods a bit.

Thank you again!




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Win $1000 with Sea-Bands!

Three lucky fans can win a Sea-Band prize pack valued at over $1000 each, which includes two Sea-Bands plus a $1000 Eftpos gift card!

Misery loves Facebook

Facebook users are often criticised for only showing the positive, fun parts of their lives. But what about when it swings the other way, when someone uses it for the purposes of ranting about their children all the time, never posting anything positive?

Toddler's adorable impersonation of pregnant mum

Little Ellis has noticed his mum is walking differently lately, and his impersonation of her is hilarious.

'Forgotten baby syndrome' can happen to any one of us

When my third child was two months old, I strapped her into her car seat, then promptly forgot all about her. But she survived, unharmed, because it was winter, and I was lucky.

Join the Real Mums Test Drive Team

Five mums or mums-to-be will join the EB Test Drive Team and discover great items at an exclusive Big W event. (Sydney only.)

Ten things I've learned about motherhood

Never take a good night's sleep for granted. There is no logic like toddler logic. Standing on Lego hurts every time. These are the truths of parenthood.

Parenting past the toddler years: what's next?

Your baby has grown into a toddler, and now your toddler is fast approaching the preschooler stage. What can you expect as a parent?

Tips on what to pack in your hospital bag

Before giving birth I read countless lists, ended up overpacking just a little, and now know what I'll actually want to pack next time.

New app keeps tabs on your kids at childcare

Popular new technology lets parents know what their children are up to at childcare - but not everyone is a fan.

21 things I love about newborns

There?s an irresistible magic about newborns. Of course they're not all smiles and rainbows, but they are undeniably cute and remarkable in so, so many ways.

Kid-friendly hairdressers: who says haircuts can?t be fun?

I?ve found some salons who boast setups ideal for children ? you name it, they?ve thought of it. All are designed to make haircuts fun rather than stressful.

Labour pain relief may reduce risk of postnatal depression: study

Postnatal depression is a complex condition, but researchers say pain relief during labour may help some women.

Why we need better support for men after miscarriage

In a recent study, 85 per cent of men admitted feeling sadness after their partner miscarried, but almost half said they didn't share their feelings at all. What can be done to help them?

Mum in business: Kristy Chong

Kristy Chong is the managing director of Australian-made Modibodi underwear and a mum to Lucas, 6, Jason, 4, and Isaac, 6 months. She shares her advice for other mums thinking about starting their own businesses.

From toddler to preschooler: a developmental roadmap

So your toddler is growing up and will soon be entering the preschooler years. Here are a few ways to frame their development that will help you understand what?s going in those beautiful, funny, clever little heads of theirs.

Mum sacrifices an eye for her unborn baby

Motherhood is full of sacrifices, but this woman has made a life-altering one - and her baby hasn't even been born.

A grandparent by any other name

A growing number of grandparents are shunning tradition and going against conventional names - but a grandparent by any other name still gives the same awesome cuddles and kisses.

Photographer captures the beauty of adoption

The love of a family is usually tough to capture on camera. This is an exception.

When labour just doesn't happen

After three healthy kids, I can?t help feeling I?ve been a little ripped off. I missed out on something I had always wanted to experience, and now I?ll never get the chance.

Be careful what you say, your baby is listening

The importance of speaking to your baby even if they are not old enough to answer back has been highlighted by new research.

Share the little things that make you smile

We're giving away a Mountain Buggy nano, the ultimate travel stroller - and here are some of the great entries so far.

Win a Mountain Buggy nano

We?re giving away the new Mountain Buggy Nano - the lightweight travel buggy! So show us the little things that make you smile for your chance to win.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Win a Mountain Buggy nano

We?re giving away the new Mountain Buggy Nano - the lightweight travel buggy! So show us the little things that make you smile for your chance to win.

Be careful what you say, your baby is listening

The importance of speaking to your baby even if they are not old enough to answer back has been highlighted by new research.

Win $1000 with Sea-Bands!

Three lucky fans can win a Sea-Band prize pack valued at over $1000 each, which includes two Sea-Bands plus a $1000 Eftpos gift card!

The beautiful moment a baby was born at the side of a road

It's not where she expected to give birth, but mum Corrine Cinatl is delighted that her daughter's roadside arrival was captured in a series of beautiful photos.

Doctor sings first Happy Birthday to newborns

His job is to deliver babies, but this US obstetrician also has a unique way of celebrating the miracle of life.

Join the Real Mums Test Drive Team

Five mums or mums-to-be will join the EB Test Drive Team and discover great items at an exclusive Big W event. (Sydney only.)

The Nappy Collective starts new drive

It's that time of year when the dedicated volunteers at The Nappy Collective do their bit to help out mums and children in need - and they need your help.

Baby shower cake wrecks

From misshapen cake babies to questionable text, from odd colour choices to internal organ recreation, these are the baby shower cakes that taste forgot.

Photographer captures the beauty of adoption

The love of a family is usually tough to capture on camera. This is an exception.

Pregnancy progression photo ideas

Want to record your pregnancy as your belly grows? Here are some creative, fun ideas for photo shoots along the way.

The myths and facts about "normal" breastfeeding

When it comes to successful breastfeeding, there is a wide variety to what is "normal", according to new research.

Tin can craft and DIY ideas

Got a few old formula, Milo or coffee cans around the house? Use these fantastic upcycling ideas to create items for around the house and yard.

Dads meet their newborn for the first time

Emotional photos of two fathers meeting their newborn son have resonated with viewers worldwide, attracting thousands of Facebook likes and shares.

Skin safety isn't just a summer worry

Lax about the slip slop slap with your kids as weather turns cooler? Here's a reminder as to why we have to remain vigilant for our children?s future health.

Personalised baby gifts

We've scoured the internet to find gorgeous personalised keepsakes and nursery decor to record baby name and dates. They make great gifts for christenings, name days and birthdays! (All prices in AU.)

Creative sleeping baby photoshoots

See how some parents and photographers have captured sleeping babies in unusual positions and using different props.

DIY kitchen and food hacks

DIY your way to a better kitchen and make cooking easier with our clever hacks. (Some content reproduced with permission from mashable.com.)

Winter warmers for babies and toddlers

Your baby or toddler will be nice and snug in these beautiful and fun winter pieces. Most are hand-made or knitted, and they're all designed to keep your little one toastie - and adorable!

 

Mind, body, beauty, life

Making time for me

We look at your wellbeing, covering health, relationships, beauty and fashion, mind and body.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.