Jump to content

How different did you feel when TTC #2 (or more)


  • Please log in to reply
12 replies to this topic

#1 SplashingRainbows

Posted 27 January 2013 - 04:28 PM

We are thinking about TTC # 2 soon and I'm feeling so differently about the whole process this time around.

We know we want two children but the experience is definitely different - first time around I was so excited and blissfully unaware of the realities of life with a baby. Second time around has been delayed much longer than we ever thought until I could get my head around doing it all again (despite loving our son and wanting another, parenting has been much harder than I expected).

Did you find it harder to get excited about # 2 (or more)? Am I just a lonely pessimist?

Will it be more exciting when there is a BFP?

I hope this doesn't come out wrong - we definitely want a second child - the emotions and thought processes just seem so different this time around.

#2 erindiv

Posted 27 January 2013 - 04:33 PM

I was a lot more casual about it. I was surprised that I got my BFP less than 4 weeks after going off the OCP, but it wasn't the same excitement as my first. With my first I was shaking and crying and all that. With my second it was just a smile and a few phone calls. My doctor was surprised I didn't go in to see her until I was 8 weeks along because she said usually people are in there the day after their BFP wanting scans etc. I wasn't in a hurry because I knew there was nothing to do until my bloods at 10 weeks biggrin.gif

It would be different for everyone.

#3 Beancat

Posted 27 January 2013 - 04:37 PM

I think it depends on the circumstances surrounding the conception.

For me it was completely different.  Number 1 and number 3 were not planned, so there was no notion of even TTC.  Number 2 was completely planned and we were so excited to be planning for another baby, however it took us four goes (lost three) to get our beautiful daughter.  So we really only had one journey as such TTC between the three of them and it was long, emotional and finally exciting when we knew she was going to stay with us.

#4 SplashingRainbows

Posted 27 January 2013 - 04:42 PM

I can relate to that Erin.

Beancat that is a good point. I'm sorry to hear of your losses.

#5 The Awesome One

Posted 27 January 2013 - 08:41 PM

It was different with us as we needed help getting pregnant, I was worried the longer it took, with DS1 we fell pregnant on my first cycle of clomid, but when TTC #2 the clomid no longer worked, so I was starting to really worry about what our next step would be. Excitement wise I can't really remember, I think they were both about the same, I remember jumping up and down and shaking both times when I found out I was pregnant, DH was really sick and in hospital when I found out I was pg with DS2 and DD so we were really happy when it happened as it meant we didn't have to put the next cycle on hold while he recovered.

#6 Poussey

Posted 27 January 2013 - 08:47 PM

I am nearly 5 weeks pregnant with number 2 and am yet to be "excited"... I really want this baby but I feel much more disconnected than I did last time!

#7 Guest_Sunnycat_*

Posted 27 January 2013 - 08:57 PM

DS was a one hit wonder and I fell pregnant first month of trying. Wasn't tracking or trying very hard. Big shock when it happened straight away.

This one took 6 months and one early miscarriage to conceive, I was using opks and completely obssessed with falling pregnant. Now that I am pregnant I'm not particularly excited. I have days where I barely remember I'm pregnant at all.

I had an early gender scan a couple of days ago and am slightly more excited now that I know the gender as it feels more real.

#8 greenthumbs

Posted 27 January 2013 - 09:07 PM

We're looking at trying for a second later this year, and the idea kind of terrifies me. Same as you I think OP, just nervous thinking about all the hard work.

I loved having a newborn and found it easy, but toddlerhood is proving very difficult at times and the thought of a toddler and a newborn? nno.gif Scary stuff!

Good luck!

#9 Shadowess

Posted 27 January 2013 - 09:11 PM

All my pregnancies were planned, but the excitment wasn't the same with 2 and 3, as it was with the first. With my 2nd, which ended in a m/c, even though it was a planned and wanted baby, it just never felt right, from the start... I wonder whether somehow I knew that things weren't going to go well. With my third pregnancy, I was desperate to fall pregnant again, and was totally obsessed with charting, and having weekly acupunture and well timed bd'ing. In the end, it only took 2 cycles to fall pregnant, once I'd recovered from the m/c.

TBH, I was a bit ho hum about the whole pregnancy, but as soon as she was born, and I saw her, I was totally smitten with her. I bonded with her a lot more easily than I did with DD1, when I was a lot more excited by the pregnancy.



#10 Spa Gonk

Posted 27 January 2013 - 09:15 PM

Whilst I was very aware of the difficulties of a baby, I actually found being pregnant really exciting.  I probably did have the initial 'what have I done' type thoughts, but I probably had these with my first too.  Baby brain had me forgetting lots of what happened the first time  around anyway.  And it was actually easier to be relaxed and not worry.  I was quite surprised that I did find subsequent pregnancies just as exciting.

I have 3 and my youngest is a baby.  I am actually so in awe of the baby's milestones, it is like I have totally forgetten when and how my other children did them.

#11 nicknick

Posted 27 January 2013 - 09:18 PM

Both of my children are IVF bub's so the process/conception for me was much the same but I will say that I agree I had a different level of excitement with my 1st. I agree in think you are less knowing about the months ahead and reality of how crap sleepless nights are. But now having both of them I can't imagine not having my DD for a moment, particularly as she approaches 1 and is full of personality & curiosity about her little life.

Yes having her wasn't the same as having DS but actually knowing what I am doing this time around and enjoying her more has been so rewarding. I definitely feel like a better mum this time around.

Edited by nicknick, 27 January 2013 - 09:24 PM.


#12 lozoodle

Posted 28 January 2013 - 06:08 AM

I was nervous as i had some ridiculous idea in my head that it was mean to dd1 and spent a lot of time worrying about her when i need not have.

I soon realised after her birth how silly it was.

With number three ive been less enthused the whole time as the whole pregnancy thing is just tedious now, i feel like ive spent most of the last five years pregnant or ttc and am over it. I am so excited about my baby though!!!

#13 Pssst...

Posted 28 January 2013 - 06:42 AM

The first time I was excited about TTC because it was finally happening. And the second time I was just as excited because I loved being pregnant so much I couldn't wait to do it again (call me crazy, plenty of people do! biggrin.gif)

And both BFPs had me jumping up and down and squealing.

The only difference was I didn't do any charting/OPKs etc when TTC the first time but I did the second time. My cycles had gone from being perfectly predictable before DD1 to being all over the place so I needed some help with the planning.

DD2 is only 7 weeks but I'm already thinking ahead to when we can TTC#3. Just have to convince DH!




0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

The popular baby name from the Rio Olympics

"With a pair of athletes who are not only successful, but seen as great role models – combined with a softer sound – it is like hitting the jackpot."

Toy stuck in baby's throat for two weeks

When Jude Atiga's baby son Laith was struggling to breathe the worried mum called an ambulance.

Mum awarded $20 million over birth power struggle with nurses

As a mother of three, Caroline Malatesta thought she knew what she was letting herself in for when it came to the birth of her fourth baby.

Win a Baby Jogger City Premier for Father's Day

To celebrate Father's Day, one lucky EB fan will win one of their own! Enter Now!

'There's a giant picture of BOOBS but I can not feed my child'

A mum was ushered out of an US department store's underwear section after discreetly breastfeeding her baby.

Why fatherhood scares many dads-to-be

Travis Bull vividly remembers discovering his partner was pregnant for the first time.

Free ticket offer

Pinky Mckay joins us again at the Essential Baby & Toddler Show presented by Blackmores with her expert baby settling advice. Register now for your free ticket.

Warning for pregnant women as flu-related deaths triple

A more than three-fold increase in flu-related deaths has sparked a plea for those with the flu to stay away from vulnerable people.

I'm trying to keep my child-free friends in my life, but it's tough

I tried to prove to my single friends that I was the same I'd always been. But marriage did change me - and motherhood has, too

For the festival lover in all of us

Pre-book & Save 50%. Get your tickets now for Kidtopia Festival. 7-9 October 2016 Parramatta Park, Sydney.

Too many parents still putting babies in unsafe bedding: study

A study found that a whopping 91 per cent of four-week-old babies had been placed in cots with unsafe bedding.

Mum's shock as toddler fat-shamed by internet trolls

When a mother uploaded a cute photograph of her 14-month old child online, she did not expect a swarm of internet trolls to write that her toddler was fat.

How an Aldi staff member made one exhausted mum's day

It was a simple act of kindness, but one that made an exhausted mother's day.

The most awww-worthy celeb baby pics of the week

It's been a pretty cute week on Instagram in terms of celebs relishing their babies.

When 'Just Do It' just doesn't cut it

When even Michelle Bridges admits to struggling with her exercise regime, it's time to accept that having small children can be a legitimate reason for exercise not happening.

What life is really like when you have five kids

Life is cute with one, manageable with three, but at times completely impossible with five.

When no one can pronounce your baby's name

In Wales it's a common name, but over here, it's cause for some confusion.

Dad shares horror tale after Roomba's run-in with dog poop

It's the poop story that's been shared hundreds of thousands of times around the world.

How a homemade wheelchair is giving baby Evelyn freedom

Like all one-year-olds, Evelyn Moore is keen to get moving and explore the world around her. But a battle with aggressive cancer left the little girl paralysed from the waist down.

Single to double pram that folds with seat attached

A pram is a large purchase, and you only want to buy once.

Mum-to-be surprises husband with big news in joy-filled photoshoot

When Bri Dow learnt that she was expecting, she immediately knew she wanted to break the news to her husband Brandon in a special way.

Blake Lively: 'Post-pregnancy slim down pressure is so unfair'

Blake Lively has urged women not to feel pressured to lose weight after pregnancy.

 
Advertisement
 

Top 5 Articles

Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

For the festival lover in all of us

Pre-book & Save 50%. Get your tickets now for Kidtopia Festival. 7-9 October 2016 Parramatta Park, Sydney.

Why drinking water can be deadly for babies

H2O is one of the necessities of life, but for babies a seemingly harmless amount of water can be fatal.

5 ways having a baby is different when you have older children

So much parenting advice is geared towards having your first baby, but what's it like having a baby when you already have children?

You can now make your own plush Falkor

Fans of The NeverEnding Story – of which there are certainly plenty – went crazy for these plush Falkors when they first went on sale last year.

Baby steps

10 things that will actually happen after having a baby

I thought I had prepared myself for motherhood. Then my baby girl arrived and knocked everything flat.

Having a baby: expectations vs reality

People love to warn you about what to expect when having a baby, but they can be way off when it comes to the reality.

Are we having fun yet? Thinking positively as a parent

Motherhood is wonderful ... except when it sucks.

The adorable smile of a baby seeing his mum clearly for the first time

There is no doubt seeing their child smile for the first time is an unforgettable moment for parents everywhere.

When breastfeeding doesn't go with the flow

Breast is best, except when it's not. And in our case, it most definitely wasn't.

'If you don't vaccinate your kids you're a bloody idiot'

The photos are heartbreaking and almost too difficult to look at, but Kayley Burke is begging other parents to take notice.

Why pregnant women should eat chocolate

In news that will make expectant mums jump for joy - and reach for a block of Cadbury - scientists have revealed chocolate could provide health benefits during pregnancy.

The baby born with an incredible head of hair

If you're in any way challenged in the follicle department, prepare to feel a jolt of envy - at a two-month-old baby.

The push for Medicare to fund lactation consultants

While meeting with a lactation consultant can make an enormous difference to a new mother, it's not a service that is available through the public health system.

Parents, this is how to cut grapes to avoid choking

One mum has learnt a harrowing lesson about the best way to cut grapes to make it safe for toddlers and little kids to eat.

Three truths about C-section mums

Lately I've been thinking about the caesarean stories and the brave women who birth their children with strength and beauty.

Help! My baby will only sleep in my arms

It's stressful to be the one who is holding your baby most of the day, but it's even more stressful to wonder, 'am I doing something wrong? Or am I creating bad habits?'

 

ENTER NOW

Win one of two Father's Day Gift Packs

Sign up to receive our new Essential Kids announcements emails for a chance to win.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.