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I have absolutely not a single idea about toilet training


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#1 epl0822

Posted 27 January 2013 - 10:41 AM

DS is 2.5 - I want to him to get toilet trained for preschool by 3 years as they only take TT'd kids. I have no clue what I'm doing. Am I supposed to just let him run around in underwear? Can I use trainer pull ups? Or will that delay?

I've been trying to get him to sit on the potty every half hour but I don't seem to be timing it right because he will always pee in between at random times. By the time I get him to sit on the potty he will have just gone. If I try to time it till later he pees before I get a chance to sit him down on the toilet. How do they make the connection to hold in? How long will it take? I'm tempted to just leave him in his nappies and hopefully some time before his 30th birthday he'll just click? Argh. Please help.

If I leave him in nappies when we go out, is that going to confuse him??

ETA: My DS doesn't seem to be bothered at all by accidents. He just does his business on the carpet, starts jumping on the puddle like it's great fun, then moves on to play with his toys.

Edited by epl0822, 27 January 2013 - 11:01 AM.


#2 erindiv

Posted 27 January 2013 - 10:45 AM

I just stopped putting nappies on DD and told her she was going to use the toilet now. She had just turned 3. She had a few accidents, around half a dozen, then she was done. I just let her wet herself a few times and she hated it, and learned that the feeling just before she weed meant she needed to run to the toilet.

I just didn't go out for those few days. I know that's not an option for some. If I'd HAD to go out I would have put her in nappies, because I didn't really want to clean THAT out of my car.

#3 Chief Pancake Make

Posted 27 January 2013 - 10:52 AM

Luckily I have a few years until I have to face TT - I understand about a "few little accidents" but how do you TT when you have carpet?

#4 sjm218

Posted 27 January 2013 - 11:03 AM

For my DS he was very regular at pooing in the morning immediately after breakfast, so we just put him on the pot after breakfast and read him a book - we had success straight away. Lots of celebration etc. We did this and only this for a few days. We never fought him, if he didn't want to sit we left it.

We then started putting him on the loo every hour, no pressure to go just a quick sit. He very quickly learnt to hold on and go. Daycare did the same and he was consistently in undies after about a month. Daycare were th ones who told us not to use pull ups just go to undies and it worked.

DS was about 2 and 3 months when he was consistently telling us and not wetting (no more taking ever hour).

Honestly I think it depends on the kid and whether they want to or not, our DS was keen from the start. Ibthink it helped a lot that DH would take him to the loo when he went as much as possible because he wants to do everything daddy does.

Good luck and stay calm.

#5 sophiasmum

Posted 27 January 2013 - 11:10 AM

To me it sounds like he's not quite ready. I would leave it a month or two & try again.

Mine were all around 3 yrs when they were TT, they couldn't seem to get it before then.

We went straight into undies, only nappies for sleeps & pullups for outings.

#6 KBM

Posted 06 February 2013 - 06:47 PM

I waited for the first warm weather after they turned 2 then into undies.  I didnt wait for 'signs' that they were ready.

A tshirt and undies is all they need when at home so youll need plenty of undies!

I started by telling the child about how when your big your wees and poos go in the toilet, and look mummy doesnt wear a nappy and neither does daddy, nan, pop (we left great nan out cos she was actually wearing nappies by then wink.gif ).  Another EB member introduced me to poo-poo lnad - oh its a wonderful place that all your wees and poos go to ater theyve gone down the water slide in the toilet.  And all mummys poos and daddys poos (add however many people as you like), theyre all there in poo poo land and theyre having fun and theyre holding hands.  But you know what, they are a bit sad.  Why are they sad mummy - cos they miss your poos.  Where do your oos go?  In the nappy then in the bin so they dont go to poo poo land.  All my kids loved the idea of poo poo land.  I took some hair out of the hair brush the other day and flushed it and DS2 told me it was going to poo poo land.

So prepare then verbally about what is happening and what your expecting from them.  Remind them to use your wee-wee muscle (I showed DS by pushing him gently in the lower tummy to show where the muscle is).

Lots of praise for just sitting on toilet 'any wees yet, no, oh well, maybe next time'.  BIG song and dance when they do finally do something on there, ring people (let your child hear) and tell them, make a big performance.

Borrow books from your local library.  My library has an online request system so I just seached toilet training and up came 6 or 7 books so I requested them all and would read them to the child at bed time.

Try taking him every 20 minutes (youll still probably miss it!) but they will soon get the idea.

#7 Soontobegran

Posted 06 February 2013 - 07:05 PM

I am a strong believer in the child choosing TT and not the parent. I know that this is not what everyone subscribes to but I think that attempting TT on a child who is not ready will cause stress, not only for you but for the child. sad.gif
To me the first signs were when they started waking from sleeps with a dry nappy or they went hours between pees during the day.
This happens at a huge variation of ages but generally not before 18 months and before 3.5...anything in between is completely normal. You will hear people tell you their children trained at 12 months but they weren't. The parents were able to either recognise signs of elimination or predict the time the child would wee or poop and catch it. The fact that you have no dirty nappies does not mean they are trained, I have had many of the 'older' community skite about 9 month olds being trained. unsure.gif

I would give it a miss for now. I would leave a potty around, have him watch you in action but taking your child to the toilet frequently is not toilet training it is catching the wee, the child needs to be able to hold onto what is in their bladder and then release it into the potty or toilet when they are full.

For this to happen they need to have a mature nervous system to the bladder and their anti diuretic hormone must be being released, until then they will not have the sensations required or the ability to hold and release independently.


Just want to add that the only time I had trouble with TT was with my first for whom I was encouraged to TT at 16 months because she wanted to wear undies and liked to sit on the potty. It was a nightmare of 4 years of 2 steps forward and 3 steps back.
The other 4 TT within a week when I went for the watch for signs method and that happened between 2.5 and 3.5 years and once they were trained that was it.

Edited by soontobegran, 06 February 2013 - 07:08 PM.


#8 Ice Queen

Posted 06 February 2013 - 07:14 PM

I read quite a good book from the library first.  At least it gave me a vague 'plan'.

The first step for me was to actually get a grasp of how often he is weeing and when.  A good sign for me with DD was a few hours at a time with a dry nappy.  Just keep having a squish and get the picture of what is going on.  If it is just happening in all small bursts constantly then I wouldn't even bother.

Another big one for me was regulate the liquids.  Don't just give him drink bottles constantly for him to sip on.  I cut it to a bigger drink with meals and the odd sip (obviously use your common sense on hot days) in between.  I found it regulated the number of times she went and help with it being more predictable.

I put a potty in the lounge and just let her choose if she wanted to use it.  Once she got the hang of it then I ditched the nappies at home, then finally out and about.

#9 43 other ferals

Posted 06 February 2013 - 07:22 PM

Thanks for asking the question...this advice is just what I need right now original.gif




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