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What to do?
I need some inspiration!

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#1 Zaeth

Posted 24 January 2013 - 03:29 PM

Bear with me, this is a bit of a ramble (I've been on pain meds and under anaesthetic recently, so hopefully this isn't a drug-induced ramble),...

I always feel like what I'm doing isn't "enough". I hate being so busy that I'm stressed and tired, but on the other hand get so bored and unmotivated when I just don't have anything to do.

I feel like I need to do something for me... something that encourages my passions, but doesn't interfere with general life committments (day-job, spending time with my 4 year old, etc).

My history - I'm 25, I have a 4 year old son, I was married young (at 19) to my "highschool sweetheart" (we have been together since I was 15 so coming up 10 years). Growing up, I used to swim competitively (national & international level), play piano & flute (music scholarship at highschool), did dancing (and competitions) until I was about 11, did well at school... basically, I was lucky to have a lot of opportunities presented to me and thrived on that. I have 4 siblings, so grew up in a busy household.

I have had fertility troubles (DS was very much planned, I knew I had issues before we were even married so went off contraceptive when I was 18, then TTC with assistance, 3 IVF attempts then conceived naturally about 15 months later). We have been trying for # 2 since DS was 18 months old (so 3 years now), and sadly had a miscarriage at 7 weeks last July. Since then, I ran into a lot of other health issues too (gallbladder disease which had me desperately ill in hospital for 2 weeks before my gallbladder was removed, then they found a lump on my kidney which was biopsied - and turned out to be benign, thankfully - but the biopsy itself caused a large haematoma bleed and subsequent kidney infection, then I was in hospital last week to remove a teratoma tumour on my ovary).

I have been working since DS was about 18 months as well, started doing about 15 hours then gradually increased over the years to 30 hours (mostly to afford buying a house). I now manage a financial planning company so it can be quite stressful.

So, suffice to say, I have always had a lot going on.

I think particularly with the health issues I've had, it has put life into perspective. I think over the years I have let all my passions get away from me and I want to have something (other than my son) to motivate me and keep me happy.

Now that my health issues are hopefully coming to an end, and my DS starts Kindy this year (3 days per week), I am feeling in a really negative frame of mind and feel totally unmotivated. I have just dropped my work hours back to 20 hours (health reasons) and have enjoyed just having "nothing to do" (for a few weeks), but I am already feeling a bit BORED.

Obviously I still need to take it easy, we are still trying for a baby, now that I've dropped hours we are having to live on a very tight budget, but I need more.

I don't really want to study - despite wanting to "become a teacher", "study psychology", etc... I have proven to myself that I am not a good studier and don't want to be "bogged down in paperwork".

Without going on too much more, can you recommend me something to do, on the following basis:

- I want to renew some passions (I love being creative, I love children, I love photography, I love adult interaction, my favourite things to do with DS are "outdoor-sy" including taking him for bike rides, going to the park, playing tennis, going to the beach, etc. I always feel better after spending time with friends, chatting intellectually. I have many interests but this is what came to my head when writing this post)

- I'd love to "make a difference in the world"

- I want to feel rejuvinated

Essentially, I want a "hobby" that fits in with my lifestyle and current plans, without having to "commit" to anything long-term.

Having said that (and on a totally different tangent), I have always considered fostering or setting up my own family day care... but I think this is something I need to commit to once I've finished having children myself.

Too much to ask? tongue.gif

#2 Berndt TÅ‘st

Posted 25 January 2013 - 06:19 AM

Sounds like you're interested in volunteer work that incorporates your interests, so maybe contact the volunteer organisation in your state to see what positions they are looking to fill. Perhaps they could find something involving photography, coaching swimming, working with disadvantaged or disabled kids, etc.
I don't think they'll be worried too much if you're not permanently available, that's par for the course with volunteers.

#3 Zaeth

Posted 29 January 2013 - 11:51 AM

Thank you!

#4 CallMeFeral

Posted 29 January 2013 - 12:00 PM

DH was once looking at some sort of thing in our local bushland reserve. I forget what it was called, but they take volunteers to do various stuff like lead tours or man the info place or - you know, I can't really remember. But it was outdoorsy! It wasn't quite being a park ranger, but it was some mini version of it.

#5 Awesome101

Posted 29 January 2013 - 12:07 PM

You sound like me. Jack of All Trades - Master of None.

Either volunteer work or a hobby to keep you motivated? I work full-time and 2 kids so no time to volunteer but I fill in my spare time with photography and cake decorating. I'm kept so busy doing things i love that I dont ever feel bored and cherish the times when I do get a few hours to sit down and do nothing.

Join a photography forum and participate in a few of their beginner challenges and work your way up from there.

You'll find what you really want out of life somewhere along the line but you need to just take small steps to get there.

#6 chevbrock

Posted 29 January 2013 - 12:17 PM

Absolutely agree that volunteering would be right up your alley!

There are plenty of websites and pages to trawl through to see what piques your interest. Try googling "community noticeboards" or something like that. Your local library might be helpful to put you in touch with some groups or activities you might want to become involved in.

And No, it's not too much to ask! original.gif

Best of luck with it all, and with your health and your family.

#7 treetree

Posted 29 January 2013 - 12:23 PM

What about a few short courses that don't have paperwork? Get a few skills to add to your resume? First aid, or car maintenance etc. Yoga, art, photography?

Also, on wanting to be a teacher, but not wanting to study, what about aiming to teach short courses in a community centre or the like? Perhaps teaching music, or something else you can do, or even something you can't as yet! English to non-speakers, craft classes, etc.

#8 Feral-as-Meggs

Posted 29 January 2013 - 12:37 PM

I volunteered as a guide at the Maritime Museum (pre DS) which was great - interaction with kids, adults and overseas visitors.  Do you have something like that in your area?  

Landcare might be good if you like the outdoors.

My stepmum volunteers for an organisation which assists children of people in prison.  


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