Jump to content

What to do?
I need some inspiration!


  • Please log in to reply
7 replies to this topic

#1 Only_Ethan

Posted 24 January 2013 - 03:29 PM

Bear with me, this is a bit of a ramble (I've been on pain meds and under anaesthetic recently, so hopefully this isn't a drug-induced ramble),...

I always feel like what I'm doing isn't "enough". I hate being so busy that I'm stressed and tired, but on the other hand get so bored and unmotivated when I just don't have anything to do.

I feel like I need to do something for me... something that encourages my passions, but doesn't interfere with general life committments (day-job, spending time with my 4 year old, etc).

My history - I'm 25, I have a 4 year old son, I was married young (at 19) to my "highschool sweetheart" (we have been together since I was 15 so coming up 10 years). Growing up, I used to swim competitively (national & international level), play piano & flute (music scholarship at highschool), did dancing (and competitions) until I was about 11, did well at school... basically, I was lucky to have a lot of opportunities presented to me and thrived on that. I have 4 siblings, so grew up in a busy household.

I have had fertility troubles (DS was very much planned, I knew I had issues before we were even married so went off contraceptive when I was 18, then TTC with assistance, 3 IVF attempts then conceived naturally about 15 months later). We have been trying for # 2 since DS was 18 months old (so 3 years now), and sadly had a miscarriage at 7 weeks last July. Since then, I ran into a lot of other health issues too (gallbladder disease which had me desperately ill in hospital for 2 weeks before my gallbladder was removed, then they found a lump on my kidney which was biopsied - and turned out to be benign, thankfully - but the biopsy itself caused a large haematoma bleed and subsequent kidney infection, then I was in hospital last week to remove a teratoma tumour on my ovary).

I have been working since DS was about 18 months as well, started doing about 15 hours then gradually increased over the years to 30 hours (mostly to afford buying a house). I now manage a financial planning company so it can be quite stressful.

So, suffice to say, I have always had a lot going on.

I think particularly with the health issues I've had, it has put life into perspective. I think over the years I have let all my passions get away from me and I want to have something (other than my son) to motivate me and keep me happy.

Now that my health issues are hopefully coming to an end, and my DS starts Kindy this year (3 days per week), I am feeling in a really negative frame of mind and feel totally unmotivated. I have just dropped my work hours back to 20 hours (health reasons) and have enjoyed just having "nothing to do" (for a few weeks), but I am already feeling a bit BORED.

Obviously I still need to take it easy, we are still trying for a baby, now that I've dropped hours we are having to live on a very tight budget, but I need more.

I don't really want to study - despite wanting to "become a teacher", "study psychology", etc... I have proven to myself that I am not a good studier and don't want to be "bogged down in paperwork".

Without going on too much more, can you recommend me something to do, on the following basis:

- I want to renew some passions (I love being creative, I love children, I love photography, I love adult interaction, my favourite things to do with DS are "outdoor-sy" including taking him for bike rides, going to the park, playing tennis, going to the beach, etc. I always feel better after spending time with friends, chatting intellectually. I have many interests but this is what came to my head when writing this post)

- I'd love to "make a difference in the world"

- I want to feel rejuvinated

Essentially, I want a "hobby" that fits in with my lifestyle and current plans, without having to "commit" to anything long-term.

Having said that (and on a totally different tangent), I have always considered fostering or setting up my own family day care... but I think this is something I need to commit to once I've finished having children myself.

Too much to ask? tongue.gif

#2 Feral Cancerian

Posted 25 January 2013 - 06:19 AM

Sounds like you're interested in volunteer work that incorporates your interests, so maybe contact the volunteer organisation in your state to see what positions they are looking to fill. Perhaps they could find something involving photography, coaching swimming, working with disadvantaged or disabled kids, etc.
I don't think they'll be worried too much if you're not permanently available, that's par for the course with volunteers.

#3 Only_Ethan

Posted 29 January 2013 - 11:51 AM

Thank you!

#4 CallMeFeral

Posted 29 January 2013 - 12:00 PM

DH was once looking at some sort of thing in our local bushland reserve. I forget what it was called, but they take volunteers to do various stuff like lead tours or man the info place or - you know, I can't really remember. But it was outdoorsy! It wasn't quite being a park ranger, but it was some mini version of it.

#5 Awesome101

Posted 29 January 2013 - 12:07 PM

You sound like me. Jack of All Trades - Master of None.

Either volunteer work or a hobby to keep you motivated? I work full-time and 2 kids so no time to volunteer but I fill in my spare time with photography and cake decorating. I'm kept so busy doing things i love that I dont ever feel bored and cherish the times when I do get a few hours to sit down and do nothing.

Join a photography forum and participate in a few of their beginner challenges and work your way up from there.

You'll find what you really want out of life somewhere along the line but you need to just take small steps to get there.

#6 chevbrock

Posted 29 January 2013 - 12:17 PM

Absolutely agree that volunteering would be right up your alley!

There are plenty of websites and pages to trawl through to see what piques your interest. Try googling "community noticeboards" or something like that. Your local library might be helpful to put you in touch with some groups or activities you might want to become involved in.

And No, it's not too much to ask! original.gif

Best of luck with it all, and with your health and your family.

#7 treetree

Posted 29 January 2013 - 12:23 PM

What about a few short courses that don't have paperwork? Get a few skills to add to your resume? First aid, or car maintenance etc. Yoga, art, photography?

Also, on wanting to be a teacher, but not wanting to study, what about aiming to teach short courses in a community centre or the like? Perhaps teaching music, or something else you can do, or even something you can't as yet! English to non-speakers, craft classes, etc.

#8 Feral-as-Meggs

Posted 29 January 2013 - 12:37 PM

I volunteered as a guide at the Maritime Museum (pre DS) which was great - interaction with kids, adults and overseas visitors.  Do you have something like that in your area?  

Landcare might be good if you like the outdoors.

My stepmum volunteers for an organisation which assists children of people in prison.  

http://www.shineforkids.org.au/help/volunteers/index.htm




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Special offer: The Baby & Toddler Show 2014

At The Baby & Toddler Show, you?ll find everything you need to get ready for your new arrival and guide you through the early weeks and years of parenting.

An open letter to Tony Abbott: please salvage our super

We face financial ruin, but most of us don?t realise it. If we don?t act together to salvage our superannuation, I have no doubt the new GFC will be the Girls? Financial Crisis.

'I'm happy to know I'm changing lives': surrogate mum of two

I know that once the baby is born, I will focus on the gift I have given, and watch the parents with their new child. I can't wait for that day.

Birth trauma and the issue of informed consent

There is a perception that women should just be happy they have a healthy baby in their arms. But for women who experienced birth trauma, there's a lot more to it.

Tips for managing pollen allergies and hayfever

They're simple tips, but they can have a big impact on those who suffer from hayfever and pollen allergies.

Ada Nicodemou shares tribute to her stillborn baby

Just over one month since Ada Nicodemou and her husband lost their second son, the Home and Away star has shared a touching poem for her baby.

Mum causes stir breastfeeding on train

?To the woman breastfeeding her kid on the train. Seriously! On the train?" began the letter of complaint.

10 things they don?t tell you about being pregnant

As I slowly waddle my ever-changing pregnant body towards the finishing line of my due date, it?s becoming increasingly clear there are a lot of things they just don?t tell you about pregnancy.

Overcoming a fear of the dark

A toddler's fear of the dark is very normal, but there are ways parents can help children through this stage in their development.

Kids, TV and movies: how young is too young?

It seems you don't have to throw the TV and iPad out the window - it all boils down to moderation, supervision and interaction.

Video: Baby's first birthday is a special day for mum, too

?A baby?s first birthday is also mum?s first birthday.?

The day Supernanny came to tea

Prince William's favourite celebrity child trainer Jo Frost puts Bryony Gordon and her toddler through their paces.

Tales from the homefront

When you're at work you sort of assume that your house is basically just sitting there quietly doing nothing until you return. However, since spending my days at home, I've learned this couldn't be further from the truth.

The words I hated hearing as new mum

It was less than a week after my son was born that I first heard it - from my mother.

To the pharmacist who sold me baby formula

On the rare occasion I catch sight of you at school, or around town, I think back to our earliest exchange. I?m sure you have no recollection of it at all.

Babies may benefit from autism therapy

Children showing signs of autism don't usually receive early intervention until well into toddlerhood or later, but a new study suggests infants with symptoms of the developmental disorder might benefit from therapy from as early as six months.

Knatalye and Adeline born with an everlasting bond

Knatalye Hope and Adeline Faith are a lot like any other identical twin girls, but there is one dramatic difference: they're joined at the chest and shares several internal organs.

The question this dad wishes he'd asked his wife

I should have seen that my wife wasn't the same person I'd fallen in love with, but we were both too focused on simply trying to get by.

Why we should talk about the deaths of the Hunt children

The deaths are too horrible even to think about. Yet we owe it to the children - Fletcher, Mia and Phoebe Hunt - to think long and hard about it all.

Baby dies of meningococcal weeks after vaccine application denied

A six-month-old girl has died from meningococcal disease just weeks after an application for government funding of a vaccine for the most deadly strain of the virus was rejected.

Finding the right balance when playing with your kids

Being too involved in our children?s play and not allowing our kids enough free time for unstructured activities can mean our kids miss out on the value that play offers.

Creative DIY light shades

The Pop Light light shade comes in a flat pack already made - it's up to you to design it as you'd like.

The battle of iParenting versus imagination

Have we forgotten how to be imaginative, resourceful parents?

Why movement is so important for your baby's growth

Letting your child move as much as possible in the early years ? using all senses, engaging in the real world, preferably outside ? will help them grow up healthier, smarter, calmer and stronger.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 

Top 5 Articles

Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Special offer: The Baby & Toddler Show 2014

At The Baby & Toddler Show, you?ll find everything you need to get ready for your new arrival and guide you through the early weeks and years of parenting.

Losing yourself to motherhood

While watching your baby grow into a unique little person is exciting and wondrous, the intensity of meeting everyone else?s needs can ever so sneakily overtake your own needs for self-care.

Tearing during delivery: the facts

Almost all women will experience bruising, grazing or tearing after a vaginal birth. Depending on the degree of tearing, there are various treatments available.

6 tips for a day out with a baby and toddler

Outings can be lots of fun with the kids, but there are inevitable challenges. Here's some information about days out to help you be a little more prepared.

Why I invited a dozen people to watch my son's birth

I sent invitations on burgundy scrapbooking paper stamped with a field of poppies, and told each person why I wanted him or her there. I warned that there would be nudity.

Getting labour started: tips for a natural induction

When your baby?s due date comes and goes without so much as a pop - let alone a bang - it can be disheartening. Mums and a doula share their stories of natural inductions.

7 mistakes old hands make with new babies

As I sat across the table from my friend ? me, a seasoned mother of three; her, a brand new mum ? I thought of all the mistakes an old-hand parent can make when visiting a newborn baby.

That's my boy: a dad's diary of the first 4 months

Unbearable anxiety, unspeakable joy, constant exhaustion and bouts of frustration ... The many shocks of first-time fatherhood resound in a dad's diary of his son's early months.

One of the most important things a new mum can do

Finances may not be as cute as a newborn, but with many women?s working arrangements changing post-baby, monetary matters need attention too.

Baby survives five days alone

He lay with his mother for up to five days after she died of a suspected drug overdose - and survived.

Personalised baby gifts

We've scoured the internet to find gorgeous personalised keepsakes and nursery decor to record baby name and dates. They make great gifts for christenings, name days and birthdays! (All prices in AU.)

 

Reader offer

2 FOR 1 TICKET OFFER

For Shopping, For Advice, For Baby & You. Enjoy a special day out with fabulous shopping from over 200 brands, leading parenting experts offering advice on a range of topics, and amazing children?s entertainment

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.