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For the sleep deprived
Join me in venting...


17 replies to this topic

#1 JoMarch

Posted 24 January 2013 - 11:40 AM

My DH is getting sick to death of hearing me whinge about how tired I am (he would never come right out & say it, but I'm getting the vibe...) and having a down in the dumps day today, so in need of a good ol' mini-vent about sleep deprivation (please feel free to join me!).

DS (6 months) is not sleeping through the night & never has, (and I know this is normal, and honestly I wouldn't expect him to yet!) but by around 3 months his sleeping improved dramatically & I was feeling pretty good eexcite.gif .  Then about a month or so later he started waking more at night again, usually 2-4 times.  On a good night he'll wake only once (like he was between ages 3-4 months).  And I know I shouldn't complain, there are a lots of mums out there who have it worse than this!

The last week or 2 I've been feeling so fatigued.  Exhausted to the point where I feel like I'm barely functioning, and I know I'm not being the best mum I could be to DS.  The house is a mess, I can't be bothered making plans to catch up with friends.  Really feeling so over it.  Even when I go to bed early I find it hard to get to sleep (never really had this problem before).  Its like I'm so over-tired I can't break the cycle ddown.gif .

Previously I've done some expressing & gotten DH to get up to DS on the weekends, but my boobs get so engorged that I end up either wanting to get up to DS for some relief, or getting the pump out in the middle of the night.  So I stopped bothering with that...

I know that things aren't THAT bad, I know people who have had it much worse.  And I know that ONE DAY he'll sleep through the night & I won't feel like such a zombie anymore.  I know theres nothing much I can do, no magic solution, and his sleeping will improve in time.  But damn it feels good to have a vent... anyone else out there need to have a whinge??

Edited by **Lucy**, 24 January 2013 - 11:42 AM.


#2 busymumof1&1/2

Posted 24 January 2013 - 11:54 AM

Can I have a whinge too? biggrin.gif
My DD2 is only sometimes sleeping through the night (she is now 13.5 months) and I am tired. I am back at work fulltime, up at 5 to get ready and the kids packed, full day at work, home again with the kids, and DD2 doesn't sleep until about 9.30pm.
My DH thinks I have it easy, as I don't do a manual labour job, like him (he sits in a forklift for Fs sake) and that it is easy to do the shopping, pick up various items on my way home, with both kids.
He did my head in yesterday, commenting how I am always whinging about how hard I have it, well then sit up and listen buddy. It is a logistical nightmare to try to do any sort of shopping with a 2 and 1 year old. Add to that they have been up since 6am (with a nap at childcare, of course) are tired, cranky, want dinner, want lollies etc. If I do go in, I am only after 2 or 3 items, so a trolley is overkill, so now I am carrying DD2, I have full hands with groceries, DD1 has just run away to look at something shiny, DD2 is leaning like the tower of PIZA, into the prime position for a booby snack, and I can't find my purse.
Yep, easiest thing in the world to do.

#3 JoMarch

Posted 24 January 2013 - 12:03 PM

Oh busymum I can't imagine being at work full time with 2 such young kids!  You must be exhausted!  Hope your DD starts sleeping through the night more often for you.

#4 joy6328

Posted 24 January 2013 - 12:06 PM

My daughter slept through the night for the first time at 8m old. We honestly thought she'd died or been kidnapped.

She's now 21m old and sleeps through the night maybe 3 nights a week. I mean from 7pm - 5am without waking up.

I hear ya. It's exhausting. During the day I resign myself to never actually sleeping like a normal person ever again. During the night I want to bash my head into the wall.

*sigh*

#5 Tesseract

Posted 24 January 2013 - 12:13 PM

Lucy I know exactly how you feel. Whinge away! It is truly awful.

I didn't do any housework in DD's first year of life. DH and I decided that if I was getting up all night then housework and cooking were his responsibility. I don't think this is unreasonable.

Can you have a nap just once a day with your DS?

For our next bub I will definitely be setting up a side car cot. That way bubs can just roll over, have a feed, and go back to sleep? No need for you to get up and because it's immediate bubs doesn't fully wake so fall back to sleep quicker. I always found DD slept better when we co-slept, but I found it quite restrictive. Side car cot solves this! Everyone gets more sleep!

Just an idea original.gif I know how hard it can be to change things when you're so tired you can't function.

#6 Feral timtam

Posted 24 January 2013 - 12:31 PM

My DH copped it yesterday from me, he's on holidays at the moment so I'm not cutting him any slack for being at work all day.

Tuesday DD was very late to bed thanks to a late nap and DH decided it was my job to put her to bed. That wouldn't have bothered me except it meant I didn't get to bed until nearly midnight, then had to be up every hour and a half tending to DS2. DS2 has a 6 hour stretch of solid sleep starting from 6pm and if I don't get to bed in that period of time my longest sleep stretch is 1 hour. Combine that with the fact that DS2 is up for the day at 4am at the absolute latest and I do not get a chance for a nap during the daylight hours thanks to older children who do not have day sleeps I was a wreck!

I ended up telling DH that if he wanted me up past 8:30pm at night he could dang well do the morning baby duties so that I could get some sleep!

#7 Rosiebubs

Posted 24 January 2013 - 12:49 PM

QUOTE (**Lucy** @ 24/01/2013, 11:40 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The last week or 2 I've been feeling so fatigued.  Exhausted to the point where I feel like I'm barely functioning, and I know I'm not being the best mum I could be to DS.  The house is a mess, I can't be bothered making plans to catch up with friends.  Really feeling so over it.  Even when I go to bed early I find it hard to get to sleep (never really had this problem before).  Its like I'm so over-tired I can't break the cycle ddown.gif .

Previously I've done some expressing & gotten DH to get up to DS on the weekends, but my boobs get so engorged that I end up either wanting to get up to DS for some relief, or getting the pump out in the middle of the night.  So I stopped bothering with that...

I know that things aren't THAT bad, I know people who have had it much worse.  And I know that ONE DAY he'll sleep through the night & I won't feel like such a zombie anymore.  I know theres nothing much I can do, no magic solution, and his sleeping will improve in time.  But damn it feels good to have a vent... anyone else out there need to have a whinge??


I hear you loud and clear, **Lucy**! My DD is also 6 months old, and we hit the 4 month sleep regression VERY hard bang on 4 months, and it hasn't gotten better yet. However, as this is second time round for me, I can assure you that this phase does pass.  My 2 year old DS sleeps through the night pretty much every night, and I never believed that was possible as he was an atrocious round the clock feeder from day dot.

This is how I cope:
- I walk to the local cafe with the kids in the pram every morning and get a takeaway coffee. The exercise and coffee help get me going.
- Keep socialising. Apologise for being non compos mentis if you feel like you have to, but keep going along anyway. I find it much tougher to be exhausted on my own at home. If you go out with friends, all the babies entertain each other!
- If I need to have a whinge or a cry to DH, I do. However, I try to do it only occasionally (like, once a week), and I give him warning that it's coming before he comes home. Typically he grabs takeaway for dinner on his way home, then gives me a back rub.

ETA: Good luck!  It does get better!

Edited by Rosiebubs, 24 January 2013 - 12:49 PM.


#8 aphraell

Posted 25 January 2013 - 11:41 AM

Can I vent too?

DD is nealry 21 months old and definitely hasn't been a great sleeper although we've had good patches (put o a couple of months at a time of sleeping through).

Current drama is we have made the move to a bed (actually taken side of cot). There are no tears at bedtime but it can take an hour for her to go to sleep and continuously putting her back to bed is exhausting!

she is sleeping through about 1/2 the time (the other times she just wants some more water and goes back to sleep so can't really complain). The issue is she is waking up at 4 or 4:30am EVERY MORNING. I cant do this! I work full time and I'm turning into a zombie. I think I prefer not waking/feeds with a day time start of something more civilised like 6am.

#9 cuddlebud

Posted 26 January 2013 - 01:38 PM

Could have written your post. It's awful not having more than 3hrs sleep in a row months on end. My brain is mush, I look terrible with bags under my eyes and don't have motivation to do anything. You're not alone, dd is six months too - hopefully solids help but I don't think she's getting up because she's hungry!

#10 Zarlias

Posted 26 January 2013 - 01:44 PM

I shouldn't have opened this  cry1.gif

I am averaging 2 - 5 hours a night atm, but have been holding on to the fact that it's supposed to get better.

#11 Mum2TwoDSs

Posted 27 January 2013 - 11:39 AM

Wow...I am so grateful for this thread! Suddenly I realized I am not alone. Suddenly i realised my bub isn't weird. suddenly i realised its not that i am doing something wrong! I remember how hard it was with DS1 so am really hoping for a bub who sleeps through this time but nope, DS2 is like his bro, every 2-4 hours he will cry in the night. And we r not at the 4 month regression yet. Oh so not looking forward to more sleep deprivation.

Thanks for sharing. You ladies made me feel like normal again!

#12 MrsWidget

Posted 27 January 2013 - 11:43 AM

I'm so tired I don't have the energy to read all the posts properly. The last 2 nights of had 3 hors in a row. For the 2 weeks before that 2 hours in a row was a luxury.  cry1.gif

#13 Lauren Bell

Posted 27 January 2013 - 11:49 AM

*Lucy* I truly understand how you feel and I'm glad it feels a little better to vent about it!




#14 Rosiebird

Posted 27 January 2013 - 12:00 PM

I can't frigging stand being up and down all night (Plus 2hrs of solide comfort sucking from DD at 2am with screaming every time I tried to get her off), being woken at 6am feeling shattered knowing I have 7hrs of toddler-wrangling before I start work and knowing I won't finish work til 11pm.

#15 mel43

Posted 27 January 2013 - 12:12 PM

My kids sleep through the night every night - at 12 and 14 they'd bloody well want to! Actually one is still asleep now glare.gif
But 2 nights ago I was in too much pain to sleep, had a bit of a snooze from 6.30am til 8. So last night I took a better painkiller (all my pain meds are meant to make you drowsy btw) so I was expecting to sleep like a log. No, same as last night just not as much pain. I don't even know why I can't sleep now cry1.gif

#16 Sunny003

Posted 27 January 2013 - 12:21 PM

They dont use sleep deprivation as a form of torture for nothing wink.gif

DD is 6wks. The other night I didn't get to sleep until after 1am. After bein up from 6.30 helping friends organise their FIL's funeral, organizing kids etc I then woke at 7, with two feeds in between.

Boys, 8 & 6 are being full on. DH's been back at work for a month. We've been on holidays for a week, back for one day and way again overnight for a wedding.

Dads had minor surgery & I've only been up to see him once sad.gif Cousin had a baby a few weeks before me & I still haven't been to see her sad.gif
We've had quite a few visitors.
School goes back Wednesday and we still need to get books & bags on Tuesday.

DH is being Pesty.

I've had haemarroids that bad I was on endone & they were taking surgery. Then mastitis. Then started bleeding heavily & had suspected retained placenta. It all settled down & the bleeding started again yesterday, along with more after birth pains (thankfully mild).
Did I mention I was tired? I forget.

Thanks, that really helps. Or maybe it's the coffee kicking in? LOL
Hope everyone gets some sleep tonight

ETA: bush fires close to home, smoke everywhere and BIL, SIL & nephews survived the tornado & are now flooded in sad.gif

Edited by Sunny003, 27 January 2013 - 12:22 PM.


#17 Cranky Kitten

Posted 27 January 2013 - 12:27 PM

DS is cutting molars.

Enough said.

#18 JoMarch

Posted 27 January 2013 - 03:33 PM

QUOTE (Zarlias @ 26/01/2013, 01:44 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I shouldn't have opened this  cry1.gif

I am averaging 2 - 5 hours a night atm, but have been holding on to the fact that it's supposed to get better.


Is your bub just 1 month old (according to your sig)? If so take comfort in the fact that it DOES get better!  Its so much better than the newborn stage now that DS is 6 months old!  I remember those days of only getting around 4 hours (broken) sleep per night.  It was awful!  I would say I get 6-7 1/2 hrs sleep per night, but its always broken which is why I'm feeling it at the moment.    

Plus, some people are really lucky and have babies that sleep through the night from only a couple of months old, so all hope isn't lost original.gif



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