Beyond terrified of starting DS on finger food
please help me feel confident/capable
, Jan 21 2013 06:22 PM
13 replies to this topic
Posted 21 January 2013 - 06:22 PM
My DS is 8mo and has 3 solid meals of puree each day (plus 5 BF) and I give him fruit in a mesh feeder, but I feel like I should be starting finger food so I don't leave it too late and give him problems accepting real food later.
The problem is I am TERRIFIED of him choking to death. I am a naturally anxious person and have been treated for PND, but I am trying to do what's best for my baby...but it's stressing me more than I could imagine. Today I gave him a 1/4 of a soft fresh plum and my heart was racing so much and I was so terrified I thought I was going to burst into tears and I had to take it off the poor fellow.
I know they have a gag reflex and its all part of learning, but i'm worried about him just sucking down a big lump and it getting stuck. He did suck down a chunk of mango accidentally when he was a bit younger and I think it got stuck for a second because he suddenly looked scared and starting crying/going red and i haven't felt confident since.
do you have any reassuring words, tips or really safe foods to start with? Or some way I could try finger food without having a mental breakdown while doing it? Is it better to give big hunks of food, so he doesn't try to swallow it all, or teeny tiny pieces that they couldn't choke on but that they can pick-up and self feed??
thanks so much.
Edited by misse10, 21 January 2013 - 07:15 PM.
Posted 21 January 2013 - 06:34 PM
I'm pretty sure the risk of choking (as opposed to gagging) is actually higher when the baby isn't in control of the food.
You can also minimise the risk by making sure your son is sitting up in a high chair (as opposed to running around concentrating on something else) and not offering the high risk stuff (whole nuts, marshmallows, popcorn, apple chunks etc)
I've also found my DS was better with a whole fruit/piece of toast/chop bone etc than chunks cut off by me, that way he could only gnaw off a small piece and by the time he's managed that its pretty mushy anyway.
Posted 21 January 2013 - 06:35 PM
start with softer foods, such as watermelon and cheese sticks, as it is harder for then to choke on stuff that disintergrates easily. Have a chat with your local playgroup association/mach nurse/childrens centres about safe feeding courses (usually a couple of hours) that they may run.
Maybe do a first aid course so that you feel confident in what to do if something does go wrong. And have a chat with your GP on ways to manage your fear and anxiety over the issue.
We all worry about this, but learnign to deal with whole foods it is an important part of growing up. You will be fine, but it is OK to get some help from the community nurses.
Posted 21 January 2013 - 06:39 PM
Start with soft food that won't block a windpipe so you feel more comfortable. Mashed food he can play with and lick off his fingers until you get a bit more relaxed. My 7mo is having grapes cut into 4's, cherries cut into 4s (de stoned of course), cucumber and other bits of soft fruit and veg. I also gave her fish fillet on the weekend. The only soft food I don't give her unless I am in control or it's mashed is banana- she loves it so much she just keeps stuffing it in. I have to give her a small piece at a time. Spaghetti is good, he'll gag on it, but won't choke.
Posted 21 January 2013 - 06:44 PM
Another vote for a first aid course, to give you the confidence to know what to do if something does go wrong.
There's a big difference between choking and gagging, but that didn't stop my parter totally freaking out every single time our little one gagged. It took him awhile to figure out the difference.
As PPs said, start with the softer things like soft fruits and watermelon. Take it slowly day by day, and you'll both build up your confidence and skills gradually. Good luck!
Posted 21 January 2013 - 06:44 PM
I totally understand how you feel - when I first gave my daughter toast I actually started to cry with anxiety and fear.
Those gums even without teeth are pretty impressive at chewing.
As some PPs have said start with soft things and in all honesty if you are so very worried book yourself onto a First Aid Course for Babies (St John's Ambulance do them) so you would know what to do calmly in the event of bub choking or any emergency - that may ease your anxiety all round if you haven't done one already.
Posted 21 January 2013 - 06:46 PM
When the mango got stuck, he was gagging, and the gagging was what brought it up. The red in the face, coughing, crying is a good sign - you can't cry or cough if your windpipe is blocked. And a strong gag reflex is a good thing - you're less likely to choke if your gag reflex makes you cough the food up before it gets too far down your throat.
Other than that, elizabethany has great advice. It can be scary, but they do need to learn.
Posted 21 January 2013 - 06:49 PM
Beware of anything small and round shaped, so grapes, cherry/grape tomatoes, cherries, or anything hard like raw carrot/apple/whole nuts.
Other than that, would you consider doing an infant first aid course? That way you will have a definite plan should choking occur.
Posted 21 January 2013 - 06:54 PM
I was like that with my first, with my second much more relaxed. I think I started off with bite sized soft cooked foods like pumpkin and potato, so they are really soft and easy to mush up. Don't stress too much OP, its not going to hurt your baby to stay on soft foods for a bit longer.
Posted 21 January 2013 - 07:00 PM
It might help to read the baby-led weaning book too? (http://www.bookdepos...y/9780091923808
) or even just do a bit of googling about it? BLW is all about finger foods and letting your child master their own gag-reflex etc so it could be reassuring to read about. My six month old has been on finger food for a few weeks now and it's amazing to watch what she can eat!
Also remember that choking is silent - gagging is noisy and unpleasant but it's a good thing, it is natures way of preventing choking.
Posted 21 January 2013 - 07:06 PM
Just start slowly moving from puree to more textured foods. You can do this by mashing things with a fork and not blending food till it's really smooth. Mash potato, banana and avocado are good starters. Soft cheeses, broccoli chunks and other soft foods. He may gag at first but that is okay and it's a natural reflex. When you see him gag don't show him your are scared.
I also think it would be a good idea to talk to someone about how you are feeling. Try to deal with it now because it won't be long and your DS will be eating a lot more than just soft foods. Gook luck.
Posted 24 January 2013 - 07:17 PM
Big chunks of soft food are great - hunks of banana, watermelon, avocado, steamed pumpkin etc. DD picks them up and then smooshes it all in her mouth - no choking, some gagging, lots of mess and a lot of fun
Posted 25 January 2013 - 10:16 AM
Toast fingers are good, with butter or mashed avacado.. Also try steamed carrot sticks or sweet potato sticks, I freeze these and take some out to defrost and give to bub. Slices of banana. We also slice up strawberries and cut the slices into smaller pieces. A few weeks ago I started giving bub pieces of frittata about 2 x3cm.
Any easy way to add some texture to your bub's puréed is to add some small pasta, cook it until it is softer than you would have it yourself. . I buy soup pasta which is made by San Remo. I add steamed diced (very small) carrot and sweet potato to the mushes I make for bub too.
Posted 28 January 2013 - 08:55 AM
thanks guys. I have done a first aid course for babies, but it didn't help the nerves i'm afraid. but at least i have a vague idea what to do if he chokes!
i tried a jar of 8mo+ baby food and it had grains of rice and tiny cubes of pumpkin in it...he wasn't too keen and gagged on almost every mouthful, but i guess he'll get used to it. He's such a good/speedy puree eater that i guess any change will be tricky for him.
righto: action plan! mashed pumpkin, sticks of steamed veggies & toast soldiers. thanks guys
1 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users
The workplace isn't always a friendly place for pregnant women. Yet working women inclined to conceal a pregnancy from prying coworkers may be better off opening up and carrying on, according to a new study.
To celebrate Mother's Day this year we are giving you the chance to win one of five great prizes simply by telling us your story.
There is so much pressure about having a baby who sleeps 'all night' , it's no wonder you worry about your baby if she wakes in the night.
What makes some names have comebacks while others silently fade into oblivion? A few factors come into play.
Dads can have many reasons for not wanting their partners to breastfeed their baby, but both parents should learn more about it before making a final decision.
Most new mums would recoil at the thought, but Sarah Stage has shared a post-pregnancy selfie just four days after giving birth.
If you're a new mum and feeling ignored by the older mum/the old hand/the has-been, please know, it's not you, it's me. Blame the last child parenting fatigue.
Having a new baby isn't tiring - it can be downright exhausting.
I was on a high. I'd done it all by myself with no help from anyone.
We're big fans of kids' birthday parties - but this is one bash we're glad we didn't get an invite to.
Everybody loves a bargain - including the Duchess of Cambridge.
A lengthy note put on the window of a fish & chip shop has gone viral due to the writer's serious doubts about the romance of travel.
Pregnant women are under pressure to do all the "right things" to have a healthy child. It results in women feeling judged about their decisions.
Giving your child a sibling when you don't want to have another baby can be a complex issue.
The mother of missing toddler William Tyrrell says she has a vision that somebody "picked him up and moved him on ... that's the only way ... to explain for him not to be there".
Most 23-year-old blokes spend their hard earned cash on fun times with mates or romantic dinners with their girlfriend, but not Tommy Connolly.
The first all-female quintuplets born in the United States were delivered last week, at 28 weeks and two days.
He may be less than a week old, but baby James Hunter has already helped his model mum silence her critics.
A recent Reddit thread has revealed some of the more creative names in the world.
A US woman awakened this week from a four-month-long coma that doctors had feared would be permanent and learned that she had given birth to a baby boy, according to her family.
Posting a lot of baby photos doesn't make you a bad person. It may make your Facebook feed a little irritating, but it doesn't make you a bad person.
It's time to shift the focus off what dads aren’t doing and shine it on what they are.
If you're only just joining the modern cloth nappy movement, or would like to spruce up your collection, we have to introduce you to Designer Bums.
When you’ve just had a baby, having sex isn’t usually top priority. In fact, for a lot of women it rates about as appealing as changing another dirty nappy.
Is it acceptable to use these car parking spots when pregnant? How many of us would admit to doing it?
Fertility doctors have described their "most extraordinary case" - creating a healthy baby from sperm taken 48 hours after a man had died.
Sign up to receive 30 amazing tips and ideas for play with baby during the month of April and submit a picture or tip on our social wall for a chance to win an amazing Fisher-Price prize pack.
You have less than a week left to win your child one of five Fisher-Price toy packs valued at over $600 each - hurry, enter today!
Let’s keep talking about these issues and not allow them to be put into a neat little box that’s labelled ‘Fix childcare and everything is solved’.
When trolls felt the need to comment on 35-year-old singer-songwriter Pink's weight, her answer was an awesome ode to body love.
A national chain of fertility clinics is offering egg donors a $5000 payment to cover their expenses, a first for Australia which is raising concerns the money could act as an inducement.
Australian officials could do nothing to stop an Australian couple from abandoning their baby son, born through surrogacy in India, after they decided they did not want to bring him to Australia.
Individual choice works for haircuts and handbags, but not for preventing infectious diseases that kill kids.
If there is one thing Leilani Rogers knows about childbirth, it is that no two deliveries are ever the same.
Note to self: less sewing, more life. Not the party dress, but the party. The toddler, as usual, has it all figured out.
In 1965, Zella Jackson-Price was told her premature baby girl had died shortly after birth.
New research suggests that taking specific pregnancy probiotics could be the answer to a range of common pregnancy side effects.
Announcing that you're expecting can be a time to express your creativity, sense of humour and imagination. Check out how other parents and parents-to-be have broken the news to friends and family.
Are you one of those that know the whole IKEA catalogue by heart? Love their stuff but want to personalise it? Here's some inspiration to help you realise the potential of IKEA furniture and fittings.
A French court may have ruled out Nutella as a baby name, but that doesn't have to stop you from taking inspiration from the supermarket (or bottle shop). See what parents in the US have chosen for their delicious little ones.
Last week to submit a picture of your baby at play for your chance to win. Visit the Play Wall to view our recent entries.