Jump to content

Why do you think she does this?


  • Please log in to reply
15 replies to this topic

#1 BubbleBird

Posted 21 January 2013 - 07:51 AM

Just interested in what others make of this. It's pretty fluffy but just baffels me.  
Every time my MIL looks after my DS she does strange things with his clothes. For example, Saturday night we dropped DS there so we could go out. Left a bag which I told here had his PJs in it. When we go to pick him up (asleep) he is wearing old clothes that she has left from her other grand kids. They weren't even PJs. They were a t shirt and uncomfy pair of shorts. Now I have to wash them, have them hang around my house and remember to return them to her.
This isn't a once off. She often puts him in girls clothes that she has there rather than using the spare clothes that I send along with him. I just find it strange. I can't ask her about it, I wouldn't get a straight answer  rolleyes.gif

#2 katpaws

Posted 21 January 2013 - 07:52 AM

How old is she? Is there a FIL around? Does she have any medical conditions?



#3 ~sydblue~

Posted 21 January 2013 - 07:56 AM

Maybe she thought she was saving you washing. I know she isn't, but it could be the reason.

#4 zzgirl

Posted 21 January 2013 - 08:00 AM

Early dementia........... (of course I'm not a qualified professional)!!

#5 CallMeProtart

Posted 21 January 2013 - 08:00 AM

To have them she must have been saving them for something - maybe she likes the idea of having clothes for him there, so she wants to get some use out of them?

#6 Studybug

Posted 21 January 2013 - 08:07 AM

QUOTE (CallMeAliG @ 21/01/2013, 08:00 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
To have them she must have been saving them for something - maybe she likes the idea of having clothes for him there, so she wants to get some use out of them?


I think this is on the money.

#7 LittleRB

Posted 21 January 2013 - 08:13 AM

Does she know about the spare clothes? Do you discuss the pj thing with her e.g. these items are in xx bag and DS needs to sleep in these pyjamas?

Maybe she just doesn't like your taste in clothing?



#8 2anewme

Posted 21 January 2013 - 08:18 AM

My mother does this.  It's her "grandparenting stamp" as we like to call it.

I could send my girls there with a full suitcase of clothes and they would come home in something completely diferent that my mother just "had in the cupboard".

I think she does it to feel important.  Like she's playing the parent role rather than being handed a child with a list of instructions.

Yes I could argue, but honestly I couldn't be bothered.  I use to just change them when I got home and send the clothes back.  

These days though its happening less and less, my 2 DDs are vocal enough to know what they want to wear and they usually pick the clothes in their bags anyway and want to wear them.  



#9 lizzzard

Posted 21 January 2013 - 08:19 AM

QUOTE (zzgirl @ 21/01/2013, 09:00 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Early dementia........... (of course I'm not a qualified professional)!!

I hope not because my mum does this too !!!

I've put it down to:
1. preferring to keep clothes at her house and use them
2. sometimes thinking the clothes I've sent are 'too good' for general playtime (I wouldn't send them if that was the case  rolleyes.gif)

It does annoy me, but I just put up with it and don't stress too much about getting them back to her...I usually leave it up to her to find them next time she's at my house (which is every week, so there's plenty of opportunity Tounge1.gif)

#10 Old Grey Mare

Posted 21 January 2013 - 08:19 AM

QUOTE (CallMeAliG @ 21/01/2013, 09:00 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
To have them she must have been saving them for something - maybe she likes the idea of having clothes for him there, so she wants to get some use out of them?



This would be my bet also. I think of all the MIL gripes I have seen on EB this is probably the fluffiest one I have seen.

#11 qak

Posted 21 January 2013 - 08:33 AM

QUOTE (BubbleBird @ 21/01/2013, 08:51 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I can't ask her about it, I wouldn't get a straight answer  rolleyes.gif


Can you ask her to make sure DS is in his own clothes when he is collected?

#12 JustBeige

Posted 21 January 2013 - 08:53 AM

I would just think she does it because she thinks my clothes are too 'good' for them and doesnt want them to get dirty.  

If it bothered me, I would change my kids at her house and leave them for her to deal with.

Dont worry about it too much OP.  As PP said, once they are old enough they will let her know if they do or dont like what she is waving at them, especially when they know they have their own pjs in the bag.

#13 EsmeLennox

Posted 21 January 2013 - 08:57 AM

My MIL used to do things like that too when the kids were smaller. Now of they stay out there she has to wash everything before she sends it home. No matter how many times I say, just stick it in their bag, you don't have to wash their clothes, she always does. It's not a big deal I just let it go, it gives he some kind of pleasure to do it. The kids usually ask me to rewash their stuff anyway because the laundry detergent my MIl uses has a strong perfume which they (and I TBH) hate, but we keep that between us.

#14 Rachaelxxx

Posted 21 January 2013 - 08:59 AM

That's a pain isn't it having to wash them and return them.  Maybe she is showing you she has the clothes at home to care for him as silly as that sounds. Maybe she doesn't realise you have spare clothes for him.  Not too sure, that's a hard one.

#15 lozoodle

Posted 21 January 2013 - 09:01 AM

My MIL used to do the exact same things! She used to babysit for me every Monday when I worked (her request, I hated it, but thankfully she wanted to stop when I had DD2) and she used to carry on about DD1 being "her baby" etc rolleyes.gif

Anyway, she used to change her out of her normal clothes when she got there, dress her up in whatever she had there (usually hand me downs from somewhere) and then change her back into her normal clothes to hand back to me. She said that she wanted her to look "pretty" when she took her to the park so she would take her in these ridiculous frilly dresses and things etc.

So strange. But she is strange in general.

#16 Chelara

Posted 21 January 2013 - 09:02 AM

She likes to provide for him, it makes her feel important?




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Britain's youngest parents: mother 12, father 13

A 12-year-old schoolgirl and her 13-year-old boyfriend are believed to have become Britain?s youngest parents, after the birth of their baby girl earlier this week.

When Prince George met Bilby George

Prince George has met an Aussie marsupial named after him in his first official engagement in Australia.

Asphyxia link another piece of the SIDS puzzle

An Australian study has uncovered information which could lead to a better understanding of why babies die from Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

Pregnant woman dies after doctor removes ovary instead of appendix

When a UK woman went to hospital suffering appendicitis, doctors mistakenly removed her healthy ovary - with tragic consequences.

The milestones I can't wait to celebrate

Nothing can beat the feeling of witnessing that first smile, first step and first word - but here's a list of 'firsts' I'm really looking forward to now.

How you develop in your baby's first year

Just as babies undergo rapid growth as they learn and change in their first year, we?re learning and changing quickly as parents, too. Don?t underestimate the developmental stages you go through when you have a baby.

Can you make your baby smarter even before birth?

A product new to Australia claims to help babies be born "as intelligent as possible", but not all experts agree on the benefits of educating babies while still in the womb.

How a mother's love helped unearth the skills of an autistic savant

Autistic savant Ping Lian Yeak, a prodigious artist who has had his work shown all over the world, couldn't have done it without the support and love of his proud mum.

Rescue dog Zoey and BFF Jasper star in adorable pics

Photographer, self-professed "crazy dog lady" and mum Grace Chon takes photos of rescue dog Zoey and her 10-month-old son Jasper together. The results are just too cute. See more on Instagram @thegracechon.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

A tiny heart: a baby?s death gives life to another

Simon Alexander Garcia lived only one brief hour. But somewhere, a little girl?s heart is beating today because of him.

Ear piercing: what age is best?

What is it that shapes our opinions on what?s an 'appropriate' age for our children to get their ears pierced? Parents share their views on how young is too young when it comes to piercing.

Why is childbirth still such a pain?

The options given to women to help them cope in labour have barely changed in years.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Ideas for recording baby milestones

Get the props, lights and camera ready to record the milestone moments in your baby's first months and years. Tip: set a reminder in your phone (or jot it in a calendar) to make sure you remember it every month.

From penis amputation to fatherhood

After a botched circumcision as a child, Mike Moore was left without a penis. Years later, and after meeting the right surgeon, he was able to become a dad - naturally.

Asphyxia link another piece of the SIDS puzzle

An Australian study has uncovered information which could lead to a better understanding of why babies die from Sudden Infant Death Syndrome.

Your baby's first shoes, made with your own hands

Imagine someone saying to you, "Your baby?s shoes are magnificent, where?d you get them?" And you reply, "Oh, these? I made them."

Mother bites off pit bull's ear to save toddler

What would you do if your child was being attacked by a vicious dog? One mother recently had to learn the hard way.

Couple dies 15 hours apart after 70 years of marriage

A couple who held hands at breakfast every morning even after 70 years of marriage have died 15 hours apart.

Behind the scenes of Kate and George's cuddly photo

Every face is partially obscured, but there's no denying the happiness and love in the faces of the royal mum and bub.

7 tips for a kid-free trip, not a guilt trip

Although I?m jumping out of my skin to take my child-free holiday, I?m dreading the goodbye. But I?m determined to make the most of it without tarnishing it with guilt or sadness about leaving the kids.

Your baby?s developmental roadmap

Caring for your new baby can feel like driving along a dark highway without a GPS: you know your destination ? a happy, healthy human being ? but you?re not sure whether you?re heading in the right direction.

Breaking out of the isolation of motherhood

There can be many reasons for mummy isolation ? and you don?t have to be a new mother to feel like you're often doing it all alone. Here, mums share their stories of feeling isolated, and what they do to try to break out of it.

The billionaire baby with $10,000 worth of prams

When money is no object you can go all out when it comes to baby transportation, as this billionaire socialite has shown.

Medication helps depressed mums to breastfeed

Breastfeeding mums are often told their medication may pass into their milk, but a new study suggests the benefits of taking antidepressants are greater than any risks to baby.

 

Free Printable Activities

Keeping little hands busy

Free printable acitivity pages like colouring in, cutting, word finders, mazes, maths activities and puzzles.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.