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Would this make you feel Uneasy?


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15 replies to this topic

#1 Bwok~Bwok

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:36 PM

Thanks everyone - have taken everything on board original.gif

Edited by Bwok~Bwok, 18 January 2013 - 01:04 PM.


#2 Riotproof

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:45 PM

I think she's trying t tell you that she still cares about you. Though I guess how you respond depends on why you fell out in the first place.

#3 Chelli

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:45 PM

I have the benefit of no hormones giving me hell, so please feel free to ignore me. However, I would guess it is your ex friends way of saying she still cares and would like to support you through this. Of course I am also not privy to any history between you and it also doesn't mean you have to accept her friendship.

Take care

#4 premmie_29weeks

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:46 PM

Maybe she us genuinely concerned for you, and used this opportunity to build bridges? Yes I would feel a bit strange about someone I don't like, or an ex or something knowing my business, I have a friends only fb page for that reason. But I don't think she means any harm, her way of saying I've been thinking of you and I'm concerned perhaps?

#5 **BOOM**

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:48 PM

could she be on EB here?  

The details in your signature might reveal who you are.  I don't come on here very often but I do see your posts on the boards often & know who you are - without knowing you IRL.  If that makes sense.



#6 MissingInAction

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:48 PM

I think she's handling this the wrong way BUT she is just trying to let you know that she still cares about you and thinks of you... it might be her way of starting to make peace with you?



#7 Rachaelxxx

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:49 PM

OP to me it just sounds like what ever happened between the two of you she still cares.

#8 FeralSqueakyBee

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:50 PM

I would assume that if her brother knows your situation and you and she used to be close that her brother has been talking to her about it, because although you haven't been speaking she still cares and has been concerned about you.

Maybe she didn't know how to approach you, especially given what you've been going through. Can you catch up for a coffee out somewhere, so there are distractions in case it gets awkward, and just feel things out? It sounds like she still wants to be friends.

#9 SophieBear

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:50 PM

Sounds like she cares and has been making sure you're ok.



#10 Maple Leaf

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:51 PM

I don't know if she still cares...I would assume she is simply nosey.

And I wouldn't like it as the friendship is over so really she has no right to know what's going on.



#11 Bwok~Bwok

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:54 PM

x

Edited by Bwok~Bwok, 18 January 2013 - 01:06 PM.


#12 CountryFeral

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:57 PM

Without knowing what caused the falling out - it does sound to me as though she wants to mend the bridge.

If you've been friends for a long time she probably HAS been 'keeping tabs' on you because she still cares... Hell my ex boyfriend from 1994 still knew what was going on in my life as people would tell him.. we were together for 7 years, people just assume you want to know? They do the same to me.

Do you want to mend the friendship?

I'm guessing that perhaps your friend/ex friend heard how you had responded to the idea that your sister's MIL had thought you were on speaking terms again and used it as her chance to speak to you.

I know when my Mum died I got a phone call from a friend I hadn't seen in years - she wasn't being a stickybeak, she had heard the news and desperately needed to check I was OK.  


Perhaps your friend/ex friend has had the same response.



#13 frizzle

Posted 18 January 2013 - 12:58 PM

I see where you are coming from. Her wording about keeping tabs would make my radar go off too. It would be far more appropriate and sensitive to say something like I heard you are having a rough time, not I am keeping tabs on you.


#14 Oriental lily

Posted 18 January 2013 - 01:04 PM

Sounds like it was a very intense friendship that you where glad to see the end of.
Yeah the tabs would annoy me, mainly ecause it's an indication that while it was the end for you, it was not for her.

And now, when your feeling fragile and vunerable she is trying to wiggle back in again.

You don't need this.
You need time to heal andrest and e around people you love and trust.
If she calls again be dismissive, give her little info and talk little.

You have no obligation to be friends with her again, especially if you feel she will bring negativety with her.


#15 Jax12

Posted 18 January 2013 - 01:07 PM

I was going to say what CountryMel has - it is very possible that she's been informed of your situation by others rather than going out of her way to stalk you.  Although phrasing it as "I've been keeping tabs on you" isn't the nicest way of letting you know.   huh.gif  Good suggestion by PP that she might be on EB.  It probably wouldn't be too hard to figure out who you are, especially if you are still in contact with her brother.

To PP who said she's just being a sticky beak, to me the fact that she picked up the phone to call you suggests she cares for you.  I am totally a sticky beak regarding what an ex-aquaintance of mine is up to but there's no way in hell I'd actually call her!  

I'm sorry that the phone call has upset you.   bbighug.gif  If she contacts you again I would thank her for her concern and end the conversation.  Make it clear that you don't want to rekindle your friendship.

#16 Riotproof

Posted 18 January 2013 - 01:07 PM


Well, in that case I'd think of limiting the information her circle has too. Sounds like you're much happier without her in your life.

Edited by rjflc69, 18 January 2013 - 01:23 PM.
Edit to remove quote of post that has been removed by OP





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