Jump to content

Sharing info with DH/DP *spin off*


  • Please log in to reply
38 replies to this topic

#1 asdf89

Posted 16 January 2013 - 09:59 PM

Following on from a comment made on a previous topic... How much do you share with your DP/DH/DF?
I know my partner's passwords for email/Facebook/net banking- not so I can monitor him or anything, but so I can help him out by transferring money/paying bills/checking flights etc when he doesn't have access to a computer. He also knows all of mine, but hasn't had to use them as much so forgets them.
I also share all my medical issues with him (breakthrough bleeding/UTIs) to the point that I think he knows more about female body functions than most of my female friends haha.
I also share news/gossip with him (even though according to some on the other post this isn't right). Mainly because I know he will never tell anyone, and sometimes you just need someone to discuss/react to things with.
So I was wondering... Is this normal (I'm not really worried if we aren't). How much do you share with your other half? Is there anything you don't share with them?

Edited by asdf89, 16 January 2013 - 10:01 PM.


#2 ubermum

Posted 16 January 2013 - 10:01 PM

I share everything. If I see his eyes start to glaze over, I know I am just boring him.


#3 asdf89

Posted 16 January 2013 - 10:06 PM

QUOTE (ubermum @ 16/01/2013, 11:01 PM)
15244669[/url]']
I share everything. If I see his eyes start to glaze over, I know I am just boring him.


Haha yep! On the phone when he starts just saying 'yep...... Yeah........yep' I know I've either bored him stupid or he's reading something/watching tv.

#4 Justaduck

Posted 16 January 2013 - 10:08 PM

I share pretty much everything with him. We have a very open relationship.
We know each others passwords (but only use them when necessary with permission...ie if DP is at work and wants to put on FB asking if anyone wants to hang out that night, then I will put that on for him...I am also the money person so if I need to transfer things around etc), so much like you OP.
DP also knows about my medical history (extensive) but he may need to one day if something arises. I seem to be prone to kidney infections so if I say I have a sore lower back etc he mentions it could be that. I also know his medical history. He has just started back on Ritalin (this morning) so I need to keep a close eye on him to make sure he doesn't suffer any of the bad side effects from it. He may not even realise if he is.
I tell him things, unless I have been told not to.

Only things I don't share with him, or hide from him are things that are to be a surprise for him. Ie I will 'block' him from seeing a fb post if I am asking for what people think about it

#5 cheekymonkeysmum

Posted 16 January 2013 - 10:11 PM

Yep we share everything to we are very open I just can't keep anything from him as he knows me to well and knows when I am keeping something from him same with me I know when he is keeping something from me.

#6 cheekymonkeysmum

Posted 16 January 2013 - 10:11 PM

Double post**.

Edited by cheekymonkeysmum, 16 January 2013 - 10:24 PM.


#7 asdf89

Posted 16 January 2013 - 10:22 PM

QUOTE (Ferdinand @ 16/01/2013, 11:11 PM)
15244697[/url]']
I share none of that stuff with my partner. There is no need.

Why on earth would you tell him you have a UTI? There is such a thing as over sharing.


Why wouldn't I tell him? He would be aware that im not feeling well and I always end up on antibiotics when I get one, so I would need to explain to him the sudden need to use condoms anyway. Not telling him would be irresponsible.

#8 bakesgirls

Posted 16 January 2013 - 10:32 PM

I tell my husband everything. We know each others passwords and pin numbers. I tell him gossip I've heard, he tells me too. He can tell me anything and I will never tell a soul if he doesn't want me to. I can tell him anything too, and he would never tell anyone.

He knows all of my medical problems, I have ulcerative colitis, he even knows when it is flaring up and I have started bleeding. He knows about any breakthrough bleeding I have between periods. There is nothing I can think of that I keep from him. I don't see the need to. We are partners in life and all that it entails.

EFS

Edited by bakesgirls, 16 January 2013 - 10:36 PM.


#9 stephanu

Posted 16 January 2013 - 10:33 PM

Yeah we tell each other everything. Mainly because we love to talk to each other. There is nothing I can think of that I wouldn't tell him and I'm pretty sure he feels the same. We tell each other gross medical stuff too. He knows so many things about me that absolutely no one else knows and vice versa.

All our emails and facebooks have the password saved so we can auto login, so I guess we have access to each others accounts. His are usually open on the main computer and I will often check his Facebook instead of mine because we share most of our friends and likes and I couldn't be bothered logging out. He does the same if mine is open.

Eta- we know each others pin numbers because it's a linked account anyway and I always forget my wallet.  rolleyes.gif

Edited by stephanu, 16 January 2013 - 10:36 PM.


#10 IShallWearMidnight

Posted 16 January 2013 - 10:48 PM

we share everything. This is the man who changed my pads, emptied my catheter bags and showered me, after watching me push a baby out of my vagina. No secrets here.

#11 i-candi

Posted 16 January 2013 - 11:00 PM

QUOTE (Ferdinand @ 16/01/2013, 11:11 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I share none of that stuff with my partner. There is no need.

Why on earth would you tell him you have a UTI? There is such a thing as over sharing.



ummmm because we have sex daily (even twice daily) on average when he is home. He would kind of notice when I don't want sex????

Whilst we don't know passwords etc if needed DH would ask me to log in and give me his passwords so I can complete his transactions for net banking. Although this is rare.



DH tells me things, I tell him things. It's just what you do when partnered.

#12 Feral Grey Mare

Posted 16 January 2013 - 11:13 PM

We have the same PIN so that is not an issue. DH is completely computer illiterate so I do all the on-line stuff. Personal or medical things? I tell him as little as possible because he just cannot keep his mouth shut and our personal business would be the talk of the pub within a nano-second.

#13 ~Supernova~

Posted 17 January 2013 - 04:27 AM

QUOTE (trishalishous @ 16/01/2013, 11:48 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
we share everything. This is the man who changed my pads, emptied my catheter bags and showered me, after watching me push a baby out of my vagina. No secrets here.



This! Except he was IN the birthing pool with me. That was just delightful to think about after LOL. But yeah, no secrets here either.

#14 Carmen02

Posted 17 January 2013 - 04:54 AM

we share everything! no secrets here! We have been through so much together we share everything together

#15 YodaTheWrinkledOne

Posted 17 January 2013 - 08:08 AM

I don't know DH's pin numbers for his bank accounts, he doesn't know mine.  In 15 years, this hasn't ever been an issue.  Then again, our main bank account (where out pays go) is a joint account, so not a lot of secrecy there. Online, I can see his accounts and he can see mine. Our individuals accounts have small balances and we know what's going on with each other wrt to them.  

I definitely tell DH a lot.  We both offload about work stuff and family stuff.  I keep DH up to date about what's going on with our friends and family (also known as gossiping, I suppose).  DH isn't interested in hearing trivial gossip, so it's pretty obvious when he shuts off listening.  He tells me what's going on with his mates, but he does have the memory of a goldfish sometimes.  He can talk with his mother and then remember a week later that he needed to tell me a, b and c.  That's just him though.

I don't feel the need to tell DH everything that I think or feel.  Or everything that is told to me either.  I assume he does the same.  But I do like the fact that I could, if I wanted to.  That's why we're together.

QUOTE (Ferdinand @ 16/01/2013, 10:11 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Why on earth would you tell him you have a UTI? There is such a thing as over sharing.

Edited, because a UTI is not the same as an IUD (have no idea why I got that mixed up, LOL!  roll2.gif )

Would I tell DH if I had a UTI?  Probably, because it would most likely mean that I was on antibiotics and DH would notice that.  Plus, he'd notice it if I started going to the toilet every 5 minutes and was feeling crook.  He'd ask what was wrong without me having to bring it to his attention.  He's seen a lot worse when I was pregnant, giving birth, so a UTI is nothing.

Edited by YodaTheWrinkledOne, 17 January 2013 - 10:28 AM.


#16 lactasticmama

Posted 17 January 2013 - 08:47 AM

We share anything & everything also. He is my husband/best friend/soul mate etc, so why not.

#17 lafonda

Posted 17 January 2013 - 08:52 AM

I tell DH everything. And I mean everything.

#18 .Jerry.

Posted 17 January 2013 - 08:55 AM

If I am told something in confidence, I keep my promise.  I don't tell my partner.  If I do, then I have not kept that secret.

I don't know his passwords and PINs, but I could have a good guess at them if I wanted to.  Thing is, I have no need or desire to know them.

I don't tell him much work stuff as it would be unprofessional of me to do so, apart from general whinges.

I have no interest in being any "closer" to him in terms of what I share.  We share interests and conversation.  We share also what needs to be shared.



#19 BadCat

Posted 17 January 2013 - 09:10 AM

Stuff to do with our life I share.  He knows where to find my bank account info (and his, I look after all the banking and finance).  He knows when I'm sick.  I don't deliberately keep anything much from him but I don't feel the need to blurt out everything either.

The only things I deliberately keep from him are things about other people that he has no business knowing.

And he doesn't know certain things from my childhood because I never speak of them to anyone.

#20 SophieBear

Posted 17 January 2013 - 09:15 AM

I share everything with DH.

He knows everything I know and he knows every ailment, mostly because I whinge.

I know everything that he remembers to tell me.

DH knows so much he knows how I have issues going to the loo and will ask how everything is going.. now that is over sharing!

#21 MrsLexiK

Posted 17 January 2013 - 09:15 AM

I tell him most things, I don't think I have ever been told something where I was asked to not tell my DH anyway.  Well maybe from my SIL but then her DH was telling my DH at the same time she was telling me.  

I log into DH's account a fair bit, moreso when I was doing his book keeping for him now it is more direct debits I have set up so it is only if he needs a balance check,  he has the ability to log into mine but doesn't remember the passwords.  Due to the way our accounts are set up and how we get paid we sometimes take each others cards. One of the accoutns which is in my name is the account our mortgage comes from and the account our stuff for the house spending (ie: pool stuff, garden stuff) I have literally been too lazy to get his own card so he just takes mine.  When I go in and change the name on my cards I will also ask for a card for DH for both of the CC's in my name and also the account which really should have been set up as a joint account.  

He has email and facebook but I know everything and I am the one that reads it to him as he would be lost.  He doesn't know my log ins but would be able to pick up my phone and tap the icon and have access to all my accounts.

#22 baddmammajamma

Posted 17 January 2013 - 09:26 AM

QUOTE (.Jerry. @ 17/01/2013, 09:55 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
If I am told something in confidence, I keep my promise.  I don't tell my partner.  If I do, then I have not kept that secret.


QUOTE (Madame Catty @ 17/01/2013, 10:05 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I consider myself a loyal person.  As such, I would NOT tell my partner gossip or secrets someone else has told me to keep to myself.  That does not mean my husband and I don't have an "open" relationship, or I'm keeping secrets from him.


QUOTE (BadCat @ 17/01/2013, 10:10 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
The only things I deliberately keep from him are things about other people that he has no business knowing.


All of these.

When a friend confides in me and says, "Please don't tell ANYONE," that "anyone" includes my husband. We are partners in life, but he is not an extension of me. It would be breaking a trust if I were to share someone else's secret, when I've promised not to tell anyone.

#23 baddmammajamma

Posted 17 January 2013 - 09:41 AM

Grrrr...weird EB double post thingy going on.....

Edited by baddmammajamma, 17 January 2013 - 09:42 AM.


#24 Chief Pancake Make

Posted 17 January 2013 - 09:54 AM

We have just been through preganancy and childbirth - there is not much that hasnt been shared.

Early on in the relationship I did have a very serious discussion after he shared something very personal with his mother.  What happens in the marriage stays in the marriage.

#25 Justaduck

Posted 17 January 2013 - 10:11 AM

QUOTE (Ferdinand @ 16/01/2013, 10:11 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I share none of that stuff with my partner. There is no need.

Why on earth would you tell him you have a UTI? There is such a thing as over sharing.


Do you tell him if you have a chest infection? Ear infection? An infection is an infection. I am not sure about others but I feel ill and drained each time I have had one, until the next day after starting antibiotics. Also you are back and forth on the toilet as it causes a sensation of needing to pee, so if he was off and on the toilet every 5mins I would be asking him if everything is okay




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Tot meets his heroes, falls apart with excitement

Two-year-old Quincy finished his potty training last week, and as part of his reward he was able to meet his idols.

Beautiful in our eyes: Georgia's story

I will never deny the fact that grief has a place when you give birth to a child who brings a set of circumstances very different to what you imagined. Because for nine months, I thought I knew my Georgie.

'It's been phenomenal': widower dad of quads thankful for support

There was nothing Erica and Carlos wanted more than a baby.

Vin Diesel names daughter after actor Paul Walker

The actor said there was "no other person" he was thinking about when he chose the name.

How midwives can help women who experience domestic violence

More than half of women who live with abusive partners experience violence during pregnancy.

Mum describes giving birth during Cyclone Pam

A new mother was told she must flee Port Vila hospital with her baby as Cyclone Pam bore down.

6 signs you're done having babies

There were a few signs I'm never going back to the land of maternity jeans, breast pumps and bassinets.

Marta Dusseldorp reveals breastfeeding cost her an acting job

Australian actress Marta Dusseldorp has revealed she was forced to withdraw from a Sydney Theatre Company production because a director did not approve of her breast feeding.

Female celebs (or their babies) with traditionally male names

Looking for a name that's a little bit different for a girl? Turn to names that have been traditionally used for males, as these celebs (or their parents) did.

'If you're anti-immunisation ... take a look at this picture of my son'

Greg Hughes is "an absolute shell of a man" as he and his wife Catherine struggle to come to terms with the loss of their newborn son Riley to whooping cough.

How an extrovert can raise an introvert

Introverts are often misunderstood as shy, and sometimes even rude. A timid child can be difficult to build rapport with, but it's important we nurture their sensitive natures.

Sheryl Sandberg's advice

'Choreplay': Help out at home to get more sex, Sandberg tells men

Forget foreplay. The new and improved route to intercourse is "choreplay" - it's good for your spouse, good for your house, and comes with the imprimatur of feminist du jour Sheryl Sandberg.

How to play with your baby

The first time your child learns a new skill at playtime is very exciting - for both you and your baby! Play is important to your child's development for a variety of reasons - here are some simple ideas for you to try at home.

I'm a single mother by choice

For me, being the best mother I can be means being a mum alone, at least for now. Thinking of my friends with inadequate partners, I wonder why more people don’t choose single motherhood.

Awkward wedding photos

Weird poses, surprise photobombs, bizarre editing: these are the wedding photos that should have never seen the light of day.

Four-week-old baby Riley Hughes dies of whooping cough

The mother of a four-week-old Perth baby who died after contracting whooping cough says her family has been left devastated by the loss of her "gorgeous, sweet" son.

Win a Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom prize pack

To celebrate the April 1 release of Holly's Magic Wand on DVD and Digital, we are giving away five DVD packs featuring the newest installment of Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom Holly's Magic Wand and many more hours of family entertainment! Enter Now!

Oh boy! Video shows family's reaction to baby surprise

Little Peyton Williams thought she was getting a baby sister named Charlee. But the two-year-old has had to settle for a doll dressed in pink after her baby "sister" turned out to be a boy.

How to help build up your baby's immune system

We all know that having a strong immune system is the best way to stay healthy – but what can we do to help it along?

'Nick, you need to call an ambulance': home birth mum's tragic death

A Melbourne mum who died after the home birth of her baby pleaded with her husband to call an ambulance because she felt she was going to die, the Victorian Coroners Court has heard.

When dads believe their baby doesn't 'like' them

Q: My two-month-old baby doesn't like me. He's perfectly content with my wife, but when I try to hold him, he gets upset and cries. I've backed off a little, thinking that he just needs a little time to get used to me, but that doesn't seem to be working. I'm starting to think I'm just not a very good dad. Is it too late for me to build a relationship with my baby?

When was the last time a stranger praised your parenting?

Wouldn’t it be great to get some nice feedback every now and then? After all, everyone likes to hear positive praise, particularly when it comes to parenting.

Special Ticket Offer, Save $8!

The Essential Baby & Toddler Show is back this April! Save $8 off the door price for a limited time only!

15 names on the verge of extinction

If you're looking to revive an older name, or don’t want anything near the top 1000 list, check out these rare monikers for your unique baby.

5 characteristics of great dads

It’s great to see a generation of dads who are more actively involved with caring, nurturing and loving their kids.

Why doesn't Australia have more breast milk banks?

When there’s no question that milk banks are important, why don’t we have more of them in Australia?

Carrie Bickmore announces birth of daughter

Television personality Carrie Bickmore has given birth to her second child.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Sign up to our 30 days of #PlayIQ challenge

Sign up to receive 30 amazing tips and ideas for play with baby during the month of April and submit a picture or tip on our social wall for a chance to win an amazing Fisher-Price prize pack.

Man faces jail after giving woman abortion pill smoothie

A Norwegian man is facing jail after putting abortion pills in his ex-girlfriend's smoothie, causing her to have a miscarriage.

'He's a blessing': family of baby born without eyes

Jordy Jackson was born without eyes. He has anophthalmia, which affects one in every 100,000 babies born.

Win one of 5 Cadbury Easter Hampers

With Easter fast approaching, Cadbury are giving away 5 Cadbury Easter Hampers. Enter Now!

Super fit model Sarah Stage defends her pregnancy body

Model Sarah Stage has defended her pregnancy body after critics claimed her slim figure at eight-and-a-half months pregnant wasn't "normal".

Win a Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom and Peppa Pig prize pack

To celebrate the April 1 release of Holly's Magic Wand on DVD and Digital, Essential Baby and Entertainment One are giving away five bumper DVD packs featuring the newest installment of Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom Holly's Magic Wand and many more hours of family entertainment! Enter Now!

Why I post breastfeeding photos online

I love to take pictures of my children. In some of the pictures, my younger son is nursing.

The day I broke my baby

There are things I wish I didn't know. I wish I didn't know that companies make tiny braces, small enough to hold necks no bigger than a wrist.

The place just for dads of multiples

When a couple discovers they're expecting multiples, the dad can sometimes be almost forgotten in all the excitement and preparation. But one group offers a space just for dads of twins and higher-order multiples.

Brave mum calls for domestic violence law reform

A brave mum of two has shared details of the harrowing attacks she suffered at the hands of her partner in a bid to help other victims of domestic violence.

Why I had the new test for Down syndrome

Early last year I turned 35, and having just found out I was pregnant, I opted to have the new test for Down syndrome.

Geeky baby gear

If your family is more into Star Wars, gaming and the periodic table than most, you might want to check out these geek-chic baby items.

2015: the year of the sheep

According to the Chinese zodiac, babies born in the year of the sheep are creative and enjoy spending quiet time with their own thoughts.

Breakthrough genetic testing now available in Australia

Pregnant women will for the first time have access to locally analysed, accurate, non-invasive pre-natal genetic testing when the first Australian clinic to offer the services opens its doors next week.

Grandbabies: the babies born looking old

Not a day under 65 and a lifetime of struggle! That's the look of these newborns, who look adorably older than their real age. Social networking site Reddit recently featured user submissions of adorable grandbabies, here are our favourites.

Family kicked off flight after toddler seatbelt drama

An entire family was kicked off a Cathay Pacific flight when a misbehaving toddler refused to put his seatbelt on.

Stolen baby found after 17 years

A baby stolen from her mother's arms shortly after birth has been found through an astonishing coincidence.

53 creative pregnancy announcements

Announcing that you're expecting can be a time to express your creativity, sense of humour and imagination. Check out how other parents and parents-to-be have broken the news to friends and family.

IKEA hacks for the nursery and kids' rooms

Are you one of those that know the whole IKEA catalogue by heart? Love their stuff but want to personalise it? Here's some inspiration to help you realise the potential of IKEA furniture and fittings.

36 baby names inspired by food and drinks

A French court may have ruled out Nutella as a baby name, but that doesn't have to stop you from taking inspiration from the supermarket (or bottle shop). See what parents in the US have chosen for their delicious little ones.

Clever breastfeeding products

Check out this range of products designed to help make your breastfeeding journey more enjoyable, manageable and convenient.

 

Sign up now!

30 days of #PlayIQ challenge

Receive a daily email from Essential Baby during April with great play tips and ideas, then submit your baby at play photos to our Playwall, Instagram or Twitter for your chance to win.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.