Jump to content

Melbourne sleep schools
Not comfortable with cont crying


12 replies to this topic

#1 MrsMammaB

Posted 13 January 2013 - 05:24 PM

I've started thinking it might be an idea to put out name down with a sleep school. I've heard mostly great things from friends and various google searches but the only thing is that I'm not comfortable with controlled crying. DD is only 20 weeks.
I've heard some will tailor the routine to suit your needs and wondering if anyone has recommendations for any that take this into consideration?
Thanks in advance.

#2 Soontobegran

Posted 13 January 2013 - 05:32 PM

There are a couple of sleep schools which do not utilise controlled crying. Both these have been accessed by two of my DD's and they are anti CC or CIO.
They are Northpark and Tweddle, my DD's found them both very supportive of their needs.

#3 AntiBourgeoisie

Posted 13 January 2013 - 08:51 PM

As STBG said.

Do bear in mind, though, that there is almost no way to help a baby learn to self-settle that involves no cryin whatsoever.

#4 ubermum

Posted 13 January 2013 - 08:57 PM

Hmmm, what is the definition of controlled crying? Is it just leaving the baby to wail uncomforted for 2, 4, 6 minutes type of thing?
I went to one of those sleep schools STBG mentioned and they taught controlled conforting. Arms through the bars of the cot, pat and shush until baby quiet, leave the room. Return and repeat if baby cries until baby is asleep or not crying.

#5 Changes

Posted 13 January 2013 - 09:02 PM

QUOTE (ubermum @ 13/01/2013, 09:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hmmm, what is the definition of controlled crying? Is it just leaving the baby to wail uncomforted for 2, 4, 6 minutes type of thing?
I went to one of those sleep schools STBG mentioned and they taught controlled conforting. Arms through the bars of the cot, pat and shush until baby quiet, leave the room. Return and repeat if baby cries until baby is asleep or not crying.


I went to Tweddle as well and this is how they did it.  I found the staff wonderful but you had to be willing to listen and take advice.  They were certainly willing to talk and come to a conclusion that suoited me.

The family opposite me were there for their 3yo and their 4mo.  The father was in charge of the 3yo and I could always hear what the nurse was saying (we were 6 feet apart) and he would agree it was the way to go and then he NEVER did it as she said.  By the last night their DD was doing the same as night one.

#6 twinboys

Posted 13 January 2013 - 09:02 PM

Have a look on the QEC website here

They have some fact sheets and podcasts that you can look at and see if there are some tips that you can start using at home.

Also if you are a resident of the city of Casey - there is a sleep nurse that can come and home visit you and help as well.
You need to see your MCHN to get the details of this service or ring the council to go through the right channels

#7 AntiBourgeoisie

Posted 13 January 2013 - 09:03 PM

Cry it out = Weisblauth method = put baby to bed, leave, close the door, don't go back until morning. Ugh. No one does this anymore.

Controlled crying = Ferber type methods = allow baby to cry alone with varying timing of checks (some as close as 2 minutely, some as long as 10 minutely, some increasing in time with each check)

Controlled comforting = usually hands on for most of it - pat/shush/other until baby sleep.

Most sleep schools/nannies use controlled comforting type methods. But some babies do get angrier if the parent is in the room, for these babies controlled crying with frequent reassurance may work better.

#8 *mylittleprince*

Posted 13 January 2013 - 09:13 PM

Not my state but I went to sleep school with 18 week old DS when we lived in Sydney.

Most sleep schools use hands on settling or responsive settling or a combination of both. I don't believe that you can teach a baby to self-settle without some type of crying and that I would rather have a bit of crying and a baby who sleeps well and is happy than one who never sleeps and is grumpy all day and night.

Hands on settling is where you ssh and pat by sticking your arms/hands over or through the bars until they are calm and almost asleep and then leave (returning if necessary). Responsive settling is where you put baby down awake but drowsy then give them a chance to self-settle (no set time but around 5 - 10 minutes?) then respond according to the cries.

Here is some sleep school info that might help you:

http://www.tresillian.net/tresillian-tips/...-12-months.html

http://www.tresillian.net/tresillian-tips/...0-6-months.html

#9 sne

Posted 13 January 2013 - 09:16 PM

I was at a O'Connell sleep school in Melbourne in July last year for my two youngest.  The first night they had me doing the controlled comforting which was a nightmare.  The kids tag teamed me up most of the night.  We (staff and I) decided that wasn't the right approach for my two.  My (or the staffs) presence in the room was just giving them a reason to be awake.  So we moved onto a variation of the controlled crying system.  But instead of giving it a time it was 3 proper cries (not grizzling).  That worked really well for my two toddlers.

I found O'Connell great as they weren't stuck on one way that was a one size fits all type of fix but were willing to try something else when what we were trying wasn't working.  I also came away with lots of information on child development, discipline etc.

I hope you can find something that works for you.  Trying to manage on not much sleep is the pits.

#10 Silver Girl

Posted 13 January 2013 - 09:17 PM

QUOTE (ubermum @ 13/01/2013, 09:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I went to one of those sleep schools STBG mentioned and they taught controlled conforting. Arms through the bars of the cot, pat and shush until baby quiet, leave the room. Return and repeat if baby cries until baby is asleep or not crying.


O'Connell Family Centre takes this approach too. We found the nurses very caring. There is a several week wait to get in in most cases but it is paid for by Medicare. I hope you get some good help wherever you go.

#11 mandala

Posted 14 January 2013 - 06:21 PM

I went to a private sleep school in Melbourne, and they used responsive settling. However, they were also responsive to parents and came up with approaches that suited each parent's comfort level. The settling was also tailored to the age and personality of the baby.

There was crying, but no baby was just abandoned.

It's worth calling the different sleep schools to discuss their approach. If they aren't going to be a good match for you, it's better to find out before you go.

#12 Feral_Pooks

Posted 14 January 2013 - 07:05 PM

Give Tweddle a call, they are fantastic and very much want to support your confidence and will tailor approaches accordingly, and according to your goals. Babies cry when you change things on them, but you do comfort them, but you do it in a way that works best for them to get sleep.

#13 MrsMammaB

Posted 18 January 2013 - 02:12 PM

Thanks so much for the replies everyone.  Im still in 2 minds if we go or not. She was sleeping through bar one night feed a couple of weeks ago and from what I read is going through 4 month old sleep regression.
I might ride it out a little longer and see how we go.

Thanks again original.gif



Reply to this topic



  


1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Tot meets his heroes, falls apart with excitement

Two-year-old Quincy finished his potty training last week, and as part of his reward he was able to meet his idols.

Beautiful in our eyes: Georgia's story

I will never deny the fact that grief has a place when you give birth to a child who brings a set of circumstances very different to what you imagined. Because for nine months, I thought I knew my Georgie.

'It's been phenomenal': widower dad of quads thankful for support

There was nothing Erica and Carlos wanted more than a baby.

Vin Diesel names daughter after actor Paul Walker

The actor said there was "no other person" he was thinking about when he chose the name.

How midwives can help women who experience domestic violence

More than half of women who live with abusive partners experience violence during pregnancy.

Mum describes giving birth during Cyclone Pam

A new mother was told she must flee Port Vila hospital with her baby as Cyclone Pam bore down.

6 signs you're done having babies

There were a few signs I'm never going back to the land of maternity jeans, breast pumps and bassinets.

Marta Dusseldorp reveals breastfeeding cost her an acting job

Australian actress Marta Dusseldorp has revealed she was forced to withdraw from a Sydney Theatre Company production because a director did not approve of her breast feeding.

Female celebs (or their babies) with traditionally male names

Looking for a name that's a little bit different for a girl? Turn to names that have been traditionally used for males, as these celebs (or their parents) did.

'If you're anti-immunisation ... take a look at this picture of my son'

Greg Hughes is "an absolute shell of a man" as he and his wife Catherine struggle to come to terms with the loss of their newborn son Riley to whooping cough.

How an extrovert can raise an introvert

Introverts are often misunderstood as shy, and sometimes even rude. A timid child can be difficult to build rapport with, but it's important we nurture their sensitive natures.

Sheryl Sandberg's advice

'Choreplay': Help out at home to get more sex, Sandberg tells men

Forget foreplay. The new and improved route to intercourse is "choreplay" - it's good for your spouse, good for your house, and comes with the imprimatur of feminist du jour Sheryl Sandberg.

How to play with your baby

The first time your child learns a new skill at playtime is very exciting - for both you and your baby! Play is important to your child's development for a variety of reasons - here are some simple ideas for you to try at home.

I'm a single mother by choice

For me, being the best mother I can be means being a mum alone, at least for now. Thinking of my friends with inadequate partners, I wonder why more people don’t choose single motherhood.

Awkward wedding photos

Weird poses, surprise photobombs, bizarre editing: these are the wedding photos that should have never seen the light of day.

Four-week-old baby Riley Hughes dies of whooping cough

The mother of a four-week-old Perth baby who died after contracting whooping cough says her family has been left devastated by the loss of her "gorgeous, sweet" son.

Win a Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom prize pack

To celebrate the April 1 release of Holly's Magic Wand on DVD and Digital, we are giving away five DVD packs featuring the newest installment of Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom Holly's Magic Wand and many more hours of family entertainment! Enter Now!

Oh boy! Video shows family's reaction to baby surprise

Little Peyton Williams thought she was getting a baby sister named Charlee. But the two-year-old has had to settle for a doll dressed in pink after her baby "sister" turned out to be a boy.

How to help build up your baby's immune system

We all know that having a strong immune system is the best way to stay healthy – but what can we do to help it along?

'Nick, you need to call an ambulance': home birth mum's tragic death

A Melbourne mum who died after the home birth of her baby pleaded with her husband to call an ambulance because she felt she was going to die, the Victorian Coroners Court has heard.

When dads believe their baby doesn't 'like' them

Q: My two-month-old baby doesn't like me. He's perfectly content with my wife, but when I try to hold him, he gets upset and cries. I've backed off a little, thinking that he just needs a little time to get used to me, but that doesn't seem to be working. I'm starting to think I'm just not a very good dad. Is it too late for me to build a relationship with my baby?

When was the last time a stranger praised your parenting?

Wouldn’t it be great to get some nice feedback every now and then? After all, everyone likes to hear positive praise, particularly when it comes to parenting.

Special Ticket Offer, Save $8!

The Essential Baby & Toddler Show is back this April! Save $8 off the door price for a limited time only!

15 names on the verge of extinction

If you're looking to revive an older name, or don’t want anything near the top 1000 list, check out these rare monikers for your unique baby.

5 characteristics of great dads

It’s great to see a generation of dads who are more actively involved with caring, nurturing and loving their kids.

Why doesn't Australia have more breast milk banks?

When there’s no question that milk banks are important, why don’t we have more of them in Australia?

Carrie Bickmore announces birth of daughter

Television personality Carrie Bickmore has given birth to her second child.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Sign up to our 30 days of #PlayIQ challenge

Sign up to receive 30 amazing tips and ideas for play with baby during the month of April and submit a picture or tip on our social wall for a chance to win an amazing Fisher-Price prize pack.

Man faces jail after giving woman abortion pill smoothie

A Norwegian man is facing jail after putting abortion pills in his ex-girlfriend's smoothie, causing her to have a miscarriage.

'He's a blessing': family of baby born without eyes

Jordy Jackson was born without eyes. He has anophthalmia, which affects one in every 100,000 babies born.

Win one of 5 Cadbury Easter Hampers

With Easter fast approaching, Cadbury are giving away 5 Cadbury Easter Hampers. Enter Now!

Super fit model Sarah Stage defends her pregnancy body

Model Sarah Stage has defended her pregnancy body after critics claimed her slim figure at eight-and-a-half months pregnant wasn't "normal".

Win a Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom and Peppa Pig prize pack

To celebrate the April 1 release of Holly's Magic Wand on DVD and Digital, Essential Baby and Entertainment One are giving away five bumper DVD packs featuring the newest installment of Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom Holly's Magic Wand and many more hours of family entertainment! Enter Now!

Why I post breastfeeding photos online

I love to take pictures of my children. In some of the pictures, my younger son is nursing.

The day I broke my baby

There are things I wish I didn't know. I wish I didn't know that companies make tiny braces, small enough to hold necks no bigger than a wrist.

The place just for dads of multiples

When a couple discovers they're expecting multiples, the dad can sometimes be almost forgotten in all the excitement and preparation. But one group offers a space just for dads of twins and higher-order multiples.

Brave mum calls for domestic violence law reform

A brave mum of two has shared details of the harrowing attacks she suffered at the hands of her partner in a bid to help other victims of domestic violence.

Why I had the new test for Down syndrome

Early last year I turned 35, and having just found out I was pregnant, I opted to have the new test for Down syndrome.

Geeky baby gear

If your family is more into Star Wars, gaming and the periodic table than most, you might want to check out these geek-chic baby items.

2015: the year of the sheep

According to the Chinese zodiac, babies born in the year of the sheep are creative and enjoy spending quiet time with their own thoughts.

Breakthrough genetic testing now available in Australia

Pregnant women will for the first time have access to locally analysed, accurate, non-invasive pre-natal genetic testing when the first Australian clinic to offer the services opens its doors next week.

Grandbabies: the babies born looking old

Not a day under 65 and a lifetime of struggle! That's the look of these newborns, who look adorably older than their real age. Social networking site Reddit recently featured user submissions of adorable grandbabies, here are our favourites.

Family kicked off flight after toddler seatbelt drama

An entire family was kicked off a Cathay Pacific flight when a misbehaving toddler refused to put his seatbelt on.

Stolen baby found after 17 years

A baby stolen from her mother's arms shortly after birth has been found through an astonishing coincidence.

53 creative pregnancy announcements

Announcing that you're expecting can be a time to express your creativity, sense of humour and imagination. Check out how other parents and parents-to-be have broken the news to friends and family.

IKEA hacks for the nursery and kids' rooms

Are you one of those that know the whole IKEA catalogue by heart? Love their stuff but want to personalise it? Here's some inspiration to help you realise the potential of IKEA furniture and fittings.

36 baby names inspired by food and drinks

A French court may have ruled out Nutella as a baby name, but that doesn't have to stop you from taking inspiration from the supermarket (or bottle shop). See what parents in the US have chosen for their delicious little ones.

Clever breastfeeding products

Check out this range of products designed to help make your breastfeeding journey more enjoyable, manageable and convenient.

 

Sign up now!

30 days of #PlayIQ challenge

Receive a daily email from Essential Baby during April with great play tips and ideas, then submit your baby at play photos to our Playwall, Instagram or Twitter for your chance to win.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.