Jump to content

Is shushing & rubbing your baby's back a prop?


5 replies to this topic

#1 frankiesmumma

Posted 12 January 2013 - 08:45 PM

I have a 5.5 month baby and I have been feeding her to sleep, which I really don't have a problem with but it doesn't seem to be working as well lately.  She is hard to get down for naps & and is waking regularly at night (sometimes to be fed but also sometimes for comfort).

I have started trying to settle her by shushing & rubbing her back which has been reasonably successful. I was just wondering, if this is simply another prop?  I am very anti CIO and just couldn't bare to leave her in a room to cry....just wondering what people think.

Thanks!

#2 soapy

Posted 12 January 2013 - 08:52 PM

After having a very difficult baby for number one and trying to do the right thing when number two came along I did what I wanted to do. Just go with the flow. Life was so much easier the second time around due to an easier baby but also not trying to do everything the 'right way'. Good luck. original.gif

#3 AntiBourgeoisie

Posted 12 January 2013 - 08:55 PM

QUOTE (frankiesmumma @ 12/01/2013, 09:45 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I have a 5.5 month baby and I have been feeding her to sleep, which I really don't have a problem with but it doesn't seem to be working as well lately.  She is hard to get down for naps & and is waking regularly at night (sometimes to be fed but also sometimes for comfort).

I have started trying to settle her by shushing & rubbing her back which has been reasonably successful. I was just wondering, if this is simply another prop?  I am very anti CIO and just couldn't bare to leave her in a room to cry....just wondering what people think.

Thanks!


It might be a prop. With these things, you have no idea until your baby indicates to you whether they expect it all night or not! Quite often, babies have different 'going to sleep' expectations compared with 'resettling' expectations.

I certainly don't think you can break a feed to sleep expectation by one day simply deciding bub will no longer be fed, popping them in their cot and walking out. That's unfair to your baby (it would be unfair if they were adults!). Babies need intermediate stages, and if shushing and rubbing is working, then go with it! I wouldn't avoid something because something else *might* happen.

You can also slowly withdraw your support over time. Shush more quietly, rub more gently until its just a hand on the back. Then withdraw yourself from the room. You may choose to start this process in a week, you may choose to start it if your current routine causes problems down the track.

There's not set rules. If its not broken then don't try to fix it. If its no longer working, then try something else. Just as you have done.

In summary - no you are doing nothing 'wrong', and in fact, I think you are doing the most logical and natural thing.

#4 Green Door

Posted 12 January 2013 - 09:05 PM

God I hope not. I did it with all 3 of mine.
Baby one slept all night from 8 week
Baby 2 from about 12 mths.
Baby 3 he is 15 mths and slept from 7 till 7, 5 out of 7 nights.
But um a what ever works for you kind of person, I hated co sleeping till number 3 now I will do anything for a nights sleep

God I hope not. I did it with all 3 of mine.
Baby one slept all night from 8 week
Baby 2 from about 12 mths.
Baby 3 he is 15 mths and slept from 7 till 7, 5 out of 7 nights.
But um a what ever works for you kind of person, I hated co sleeping till number 3 now I will do anything for a nights sleep

#5 Guest_divineM_*

Posted 12 January 2013 - 09:15 PM

It did become a prop for my DD and she started waking frequently from around 5 months of age. It may or may not happen with your LO. We had to teach DD to self settle and resettle so everyone could get some sleep. Did that at around 8 months.

#6 niggles

Posted 12 January 2013 - 09:16 PM

It really is as simple as doing what is working for you, baby and family. Call it a tool if you prefer. And if it's a tool that's working then it.'s a good tool.

From birth my baby liked to be lightly swaddled and left in the cot alone to go to sleep. Then he wouldn't go to sleep unless he was unswaddled and cuddled and rocked. Now he refuses to be rocked and so he's relearning to sleep in the cot with me sometimes rubbing his back and sometimes just sitting nearby reading and 'ignoring' him.

With both my children I've found it best to follow their lead and to be flexible and ready to change a routine that's no longer working.



Reply to this topic



  


1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Wet wipes linked to rise in allergic reactions

The government has issued a health warning after a rise in allergic skin reactions has been linked to a preservative found in some wet wipes.

Gay couple in their 80s first to wed in Dallas after Supreme Court ruling

Love may have won, but it came with quite the wait.

William Tyrrell's family marks birthday with cake and renewed appeal

The family of missing boy William Tyrrell will mark his fourth birthday on Friday making a cake to share with friends and family as NSW police renewed their public appeal for information on his disappearance.

What all parents should know about safe babywearing

A picture of Ryan Reynolds always gets the girls talking, and a recently shared photo has done exactly that - but this time, it's for all the wrong reasons.

Baby's head shape reveals potentially fatal condition

Thinking her baby just had an unusually shaped head, a mother was shocked to discover it was instead linked to a dangerous condition.

'Help - my toddler hits me!'

My toddler has started hitting when he gets frustrated, is feeling ignored, or just thinks it might be fun.

Why IVF success rates may not be what you think

Transparency, accountability and responsibilityare essential measures to protect IVF vulnerable patients.

On the 10th anniversary of my son's death

This day marks a significant day. Today marks 10 years since I lost my son Kai.

Owning a pair of nail scissors does not make me a hairdresser

It's been a whole year since sleeping in until 10am. A whole year since having a peaceful shower.

WIN A $500 VISA DEBIT CARD

Are you a parent, or are you planning to be? Tell us what you think and you'll go in the draw to win a $500 gift card!

Sexy time

Why you should get excited about scheduling sex

Unfortunately, the belief that sex should always be spontaneous is a myth. It just isn't.

Orphaned baby daughter Ayla wakes from coma

Former All Black Jerry Collins' critically injured orphaned daughter has awoken from her coma and is able to bottle-feed.

Dad takes miraculous catch while feeding baby

One American father has taken multitasking to a new level at a Cubs-Dodgers baseball game at Wrigley Field.

'Samuel is our firstborn, and he will never be forgotten'

Having lost their firstborn at one day old, the Carrolls were overjoyed to welcome their daughter Isobel into the world a year later.

The top 6 misleading parenting terms

From 'morning sickness' to 'the terrible twos', there are many parenting terms that are misleading.

When 'good' nannies go bad

While most nannies take pride in their work, there can be some who have a hidden side.

Woman hospitalised for skinny jeans injury

Beware: skinny jeans might be bad for your health.

Gauze seeding: the bacteria-breeding birth trend

A number of women having caesarean deliveries are now taking steps to give their baby a better 'microbiome' start in life.

Jimmy Fallon writes new children's book for dads

Jimmy Fallon, host of NBC's The Tonight Show, recently wrote a children's book about every father's secret wish for their baby's first word to be "dada" - not "mama".

28 names for babies born in winter

Looking for some baby name inspiration for a bub born during the colder months? Here are 28 options from around the world to consider.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

27 funny ultrasound pictures

Ultrasounds give you a look at your growing baby ... and sometimes what appears to their womb-buddy, or your bub in an amusing position.

The horrible act that sparked a brawl at child's birthday party

The uncle of the seven-year-old girl at the centre of the brawl at child's birthday party in Sydney's west has described the events leading up to the alarming show of violence.

Babies 'benefit from iPads at a young age': study

More often than not, you'll read that screen time for children should be kept to a minimum - but some scientists are now challenging this way of thinking.

Do mums really just obsessively talk about their children?

Natalie Reilly describes three main types of conversations mothers have. And, surprise, they're not all about kids.

Why some dogs might attack babies or young kids

A baby's smell, the noises it makes and even its gaze can contribute to the potential for a dog attack.

Mum demands refund for 'beargina' christening cake

It was meant to be a tasteful cake to help celebrate a three-year-old's christening.

5 things no one warns you about after giving birth

How many times have you been warned about all the sleepless nights you have to 'look forward to' when you become a parent?

Police officer sang nursery rhyme as heartbreaking photo was taken

A police officer arrived at a devastating scene on Thursday: a car crash resulting in all passengers being thrown from the vehicle.

Don't worry, working mums: Just leave Dad in charge at home

Want to open the boardroom doors for women? Encourage - heck, praise - dads who stay home with their children.

Hilaria Baldwin shares post-baby selfie

Just two days after giving birth, actor Alec Balwin's wife posted a post-baby picture on social media.

'Help - my child won't ever do what I ask!'

Compliance is part of the parent-child relationship, but so is resistance. It's all natural.

Postnatal depression support gets $23 million boost in NSW

The Baird government will include $22.8 million in Tuesday's NSW budget to expand a program designed to help parents at risk of postnatal depression (PND).

'I'm just as tired, scared and stressed as you': stay-at-home dad's plea

I'm really lucky to have two great kids, but I found it really tough with so much being aimed at the mothers and not the fathers.

6 tips for transitioning back to work after baby

Mums returning to work - and yes, dads too - aren't the same as when they left. But that doesn't mean they're not as good as they once were.

Couple reveals pregnancy with epic Britney Spears parody

How do you create an original pregnancy announcement and gender reveal? You turn to Britney Spears.

The truth about birthing a big baby

When told that they are having a 'big baby', many women have a lot of fears. But those fears are often unfounded.

Eight months pregnant and addicted to eating soap

This bizarre snack takes the cake (of soap) when it comes to weird pregnancy cravings.

Can you spot the drowning child?

Can you spot him in the video? The child who loses his rubber ring, panics, and then almost drowns? It isn't easy.

Noodles, peanuts, wee wees and lady bits

Yes, I know it's silly. I know all the advice from experts is to use the right terminology from the moment your child can talk. But I just can't.

Mum's brave battle for unborn triplets amid cancer diagnosis

Bree O'Malley has a cancer diagnosis, a rare blood condition, kidney and liver failure and other complications. And she is pregnant with triplets.

 

Win $500

WIN A $500 VISA DEBIT CARD

Are you are parent or planning to be? We want to know what you think - let us know and you'll be in the draw to win a $500 gift card.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.