Jump to content

Clumsy Dad may have hurt baby?


  • Please log in to reply
46 replies to this topic

#1 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:02 PM

So my husband is pretty clumsy and he accidently hurts me all the time but this morning he got up from bed and put his whole weight on my uterus with his elbow and it hurt like anything. It literally felt like it was going to fall out from the pressure.

Ever since I have been cramping. He is allot heaiver than me (like 45 kilo heavier) and is a big guy.

Should I be expecting a miscarriage soon? Initially I kept getting really sharp pains for about 3 hours then it changed to a bad period pain feeling.

Really bummed out about it sad.gif He has accidently hurt me several times at night in that area but not too bad  and its driving me insane I just want to wrap myself up in bubblewrap

#2 ubermum

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:08 PM

How far along are you?

Your husband needs to learn to be more careful. There is a little, defenceless person coming along soon. The way you describe him, I am picturing a giant clumsy toddler.

#3 SophieBear

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:08 PM

Oh my gosh OP! How far along are you?

I'd go to the hospital.. how could he miss the bed and put his weight on your body?!

Perhaps sleep apart.

Please take care of yourself! I hope all is ok.

#4 seaside_feral

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:09 PM

How did he accidentally put his whole weight on your belly OP?  Seems a very strange thing....
Are you sure everything is ok?  If not please contact a support service in your state, happy to send you links if you need them.

How many weeks along are you?

Babies are certainly very well protected in the womb, but I would be going to the hospital for a check up in your situation, as abdominal trauma could (but may not) impact on your baby.

#5 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:17 PM

I'm only 6 weeks along. I promise you he is actually a VERY loving caring person and he would never hurt me on purpose and he felt extremely guilty and apologised. Perhaps it wasn't his whole weight I guess - but I mean he was pushing himself up from the bed and kinda slipped and elbowed me - Its really hard to explain lol it happened very quickly and I didn't actually see exactly what has happened and argh I assume at least half of the weight went on there but it felt like allot more.


I haven't talked about it much to him becasue I feel so sorry for the guy - it would wreck him if I even suggested he had casued a miscarriage if it happens. I told him everything will be fine.

Its only 6 weeks so I felt like going ot the hospital would be fruitless becasue they won't be able to save the baby sad.gif It actually concerns me a bit more that I' only 6 weeks as there isn't that much protection compared to further on...




#6 Feral-as-Meggs

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:18 PM

Are you OK?  Your 2 posts this evening don't seem to go together.

I'm pretty sure at 6 weeks the baby is way down in your pelvis and behind your bladder etc, and is very well cushioned.

Edited by meggs1, 12 January 2013 - 06:21 PM.


#7 ubermum

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:21 PM

At 6weeks, it's quite likely he wouldn't have done much damage. There is a lot of other tissues and structures around that area that will offer you some protection. You are right though, there isn't anything that can be done at this stage except waiting to see and training that big oaf to be more careful.

#8 Freddie'sMum

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:22 PM

OK - OP - your post is raising red flags with me.

Firstly you mention that your DH is "clumsy" and "accidentally hurts me all the time".  He also weighs 45kgs more than you - that's a hell of a lot of more weight.

I don't know how far along you are with your pregnancy but for your DH to put all his weight onto you - your uterus - is just plain strange.  Occasionally DH or I will accidentally knock against each other, but you damn well know that you have hit / touched another person - and you very quickly move and apologise.

Go to your OB / doctor / midwife and please get checked out.

Suggest to your DH that he sleeps in another bed until his "cluminess" is sorted out.



#9 gmc88

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:27 PM

Hi hanz33,
Just wanted to say I hope everything is ok with bubby, accidents happen hheart.gif

#10 noonehere

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:34 PM

I hope bub is ok

#11 MummySmiles

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:39 PM

She said he was pushing himself out the bed and slipped and elbowed her... Jeez everything doesn't have to be suss all the time. Accidents happen!

#12 katrina24

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:40 PM

I think at 6 weeks your uterus is still tucked safely behind your pubic bone. But, if you have any concerns, definitely seek medical advice.

#13 Velvetta

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:42 PM

I think the red flags people are talking about are that maybe your DH wants you to miscarriage. Sorry to be so blunt and forgive me if i'm wrong. Definitely start sleeping in another bed to protect yourself and your child. It is also highly unlikely that your babe is hurt at 6 weeks unless the full 45 kilos was impressed.  t is also normal to have pains and aches and even small bleeds at 6 weeks. And if you do miscarriage, it is not necessarily his fault as this is also very common before 12 weeks.
Best wishes x

#14 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:43 PM

QUOTE (Freddie'sMum @ 12/01/2013, 06:22 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
OK - OP - your post is raising red flags with me.

Firstly you mention that your DH is "clumsy" and "accidentally hurts me all the time".  He also weighs 45kgs more than you - that's a hell of a lot of more weight.

I don't know how far along you are with your pregnancy but for your DH to put all his weight onto you - your uterus - is just plain strange.  Occasionally DH or I will accidentally knock against each other, but you damn well know that you have hit / touched another person - and you very quickly move and apologise.

Go to your OB / doctor / midwife and please get checked out.

Suggest to your DH that he sleeps in another bed until his "cluminess" is sorted out.


Oh sad.gif  I am really sorry I am making this sound like he is an awful person honestly he is a wonderful guy and it may not have been his full weight I should have said 'felt like his full weight' but it was probably allot less then that. He did move very quickly it was a very quick heavy jab and he did apologise.


Honestly in no way is my husband an abuser he is just so clumsy. E.G he will forget how close I am to  him in bed and shift backwards and hit my boobs  and get my boobs all the time! OUCH! but it is a complete acccident but because he is allot heavier than me it is allot of weight on me.


I am not here to berate him in anyway he is a wonderful guy and infact thought I looked a bit tired and sent me to bed while he makes me dinner which he actually cooks more than me + works more than me etc. Honestly he is an amazing man - I was just explaining the situation :/ Sorry to lead you guys to believe he is something he isn't.

#15 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:47 PM

QUOTE (Rawr @ 12/01/2013, 06:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I was kicked in the guts by goats at five months once, and had cramping etc. Everything was fine, but I did ring my midwife. OP, always raise ANY doubts with your medical people, be it a doctor, midwife, whatever.

And your partner needs to be more careful


Oh its good to here everything turned out fine original.gif

I agree he does nad he is trying so hard - I  was contimplating just the other day if I should sleep in the other bed.

QUOTE (ann** @ 12/01/2013, 06:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
She said he was pushing himself out the bed and slipped and elbowed her... Jeez everything doesn't have to be suss all the time. Accidents happen!


Thank you!!! It is deffinately nothing sus.

#16 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:48 PM

QUOTE (Velvetta @ 12/01/2013, 06:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I think the red flags people are talking about are that maybe your DH wants you to miscarriage.


Nope. He was the one wanting a baby for years original.gif

#17 *maddierose*

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:49 PM

QUOTE
Sorry to lead you guys to believe he is something he isn't.


Op maybe you could of worded it better but you have nothing to be sorry for. I interpreted your post the way you intended, a lot of ebers just read things into posts that are not there.

Best of luck with your pregnancy, bub should be fine from this as they are well cushioned at an early stage.

#18 password123

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:49 PM

Don't worry OP, I get you. My husband did a similar thing to me in bed during my tww after our ivf cycle. It hurt my poor belly so much and I was convinced our embryo wouldn't implant, but she's currently whingeing for booby right now, so she's ok wink.gif
Accidents happen. Men can be clumsy. So can I. I've accidentally hurt him far more than he me!

#19 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:51 PM

QUOTE (Mrs_Snorks @ 12/01/2013, 06:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Don't worry OP, I get you. My husband did a similar thing to me in bed during my tww after our ivf cycle. It hurt my poor belly so much and I was convinced our embryo wouldn't implant, but she's currently whingeing for booby right now, so she's ok wink.gif
Accidents happen. Men can be clumsy. So can I. I've accidentally hurt him far more than he me!


Thank you so much. I can stop stressing =D

#20 Soontobegran

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:53 PM

Your baby isn't in your abdomen at 6 weeks, it is protected behind your pelvic bone so his pressing will do nothing to your baby however he could well bruise other organs if he is not more careful.
Into different beds for sure and I think he needs to address his clumsiness before your baby arrives.
Good luck.

#21 BetteBoop

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:54 PM

My DH is the same. It doesn't help that I have the grace of the 3 legged pregnant cow.

I'm glad you're okay OP. I feel down the stairs twice in my third trimester and the baby was fine.

Fortunately they're clumsy proof in there  wink.gif

QUOTE (Rawr @ 12/01/2013, 06:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I was kicked in the guts by goats at five months once


I feel like there's a potentially amusing story that needs to be told here....

#22 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:57 PM

QUOTE (Ferdinand @ 12/01/2013, 06:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I know exactly what you mean by clumsy and being accidentally hurt. DP is the same, has next to no awareness of his body's movement in space and regularly misjudges distances, positioning of limbs etc. Even attempts at affection can be fraught due to him misjudging where his body is in relation to mine - I'd cop an elbow in the forehead instead of an arm around my shoulder or we'd clonk heads instead having a kiss.

We often joke about the time he whacked his front tooth so hard into my forehead that he actually drew blood, yet his tooth was fine.

I wouldn't have put it past him to accidentally do the same thing your partner did when I was pregnant, he is that much of a clutz.

Anyway, I hope you and the baby are ok with a bit of rest. They're pretty well padded in there even early on.



lol this sounds exactly like my hubby - our first kiss was him misjudgeing and smashing my teeth with his teeth! Romantic wink.gif

#23 katrina24

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:58 PM

I also didn't see anything odd about your DH accidentally injuring you in bed. My hubby is lovely too but has whacked me in the head during sleep a few times over the years. Once he even busted my lip - just an arm thrown the wrong way while sleeping, nothing suss here at all.

Edited by katrina24, 12 January 2013 - 06:58 PM.


#24 ~sydblue~

Posted 12 January 2013 - 07:10 PM

Oh FGS the guy is clumsy. Yes he should be more carefull with his pregnant wife, but to crucify the guy and say he is either abusive or wanting her to miscarry is just disgusting.

Just reminds me about how hated men can be on this site.

#25 jill1972

Posted 12 January 2013 - 07:32 PM

OP I was 8 wks pg with my IVF twins when my dd jumped on my tummy.  I copped a very heavy hit & I was absolutely terrified something bad was going to happen.  I phoned the nurses & they assured me that it would take a lot more than to hurt my bubs (& I had 2 in there).  They explained that there was a lot of protective surrounding tissues etc.  Nothing bad happened.  I hope all is well with you.


_______




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Special offer: The Baby & Toddler Show 2014

At The Baby & Toddler Show, you?ll find everything you need to get ready for your new arrival and guide you through the early weeks and years of parenting.

The words I hated hearing as new mum

It was less than a week after my son was born that I first heard it - from my mother.

To the pharmacist who sold me baby formula

On the rare occasion I catch sight of you at school, or around town, I think back to our earliest exchange. I?m sure you have no recollection of it at all.

Babies may benefit from autism therapy

Children showing signs of autism don't usually receive early intervention until well into toddlerhood or later, but a new study suggests infants with symptoms of the developmental disorder might benefit from therapy from as early as six months.

Knatalye and Adeline born with an everlasting bond

Knatalye Hope and Adeline Faith are a lot like any other identical twin girls, but there is one dramatic difference: they're joined at the chest and shares several internal organs.

The question this dad wishes he'd asked his wife

I should have seen that my wife wasn't the same person I'd fallen in love with, but we were both too focused on simply trying to get by.

Why we should talk about the deaths of the Hunt children

The deaths are too horrible even to think about. Yet we owe it to the children - Fletcher, Mia and Phoebe Hunt - to think long and hard about it all.

Baby dies of meningococcal weeks after vaccine application denied

A six-month-old girl has died from meningococcal disease just weeks after an application for government funding of a vaccine for the most deadly strain of the virus was rejected.

Finding the right balance when playing with your kids

Being too involved in our children?s play and not allowing our kids enough free time for unstructured activities can mean our kids miss out on the value that play offers.

Creative DIY light shades

The Pop Light light shade comes in a flat pack already made - it's up to you to design it as you'd like.

The battle of iParenting versus imagination

Have we forgotten how to be imaginative, resourceful parents?

Why movement is so important for your baby's growth

Letting your child move as much as possible in the early years ? using all senses, engaging in the real world, preferably outside ? will help them grow up healthier, smarter, calmer and stronger.

Video: Toddler not keen on clean-shaven dad

This little girl thought she was taking part in a standard game of peek-a-boo, but her dad had a surprise for her.

When will I feel like myself again?

At some point I became 'me' again, but not the same me that I was ... and that?s not a bad thing.

Our Watch: ending the national emergency of domestic violence

An ambitious new national initiative aims to address the "national emergency" of domestic violence across Australia.

Decrease in stillbirths in late pregnancy and older mums

There has been a fall in the number of stillbirths among some groups of women despite the overall rate remaining stable, a new report reveals.

My baby was permanently injured during birth

My baby was a few months old when we first heard the term ?brachial plexus birth injury? and the heart wrenching news that he may never gain full function of his arm.

Being a yo-yo mama is the rhythm of motherhood

A flip-flop happy-sad can occur in the same minute, the same second. And it continues forever, throughout a yo-yo mama's tenure, beginning with pregnancy.

Is it okay to ask for money instead of gifts?

First it was weddings. Then it was engagement parties. Now it seems christenings are following the trend of asking guests for money in lieu of gifts.

Crash testing new parenthood

The new documentary series Crash Test Mummies & Daddies takes a fly-on-the-wall look at the first months of life with a newborn.

Itching for a solution to eczema

Around 30 per cent of children live with eczema every day. A dad shares his son's story and gets advice from an expert.

Video: The challenges and joys of making new mum friends

This hilarious video shows how making new mum friends can be awkward - but reassures that it is possible.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Special offer: The Baby & Toddler Show 2014

At The Baby & Toddler Show, you?ll find everything you need to get ready for your new arrival and guide you through the early weeks and years of parenting.

Win a House of Magic prize pack

To celebrate the release of the new movie House of Magic, we have 10 double passes and magic sets to give away just in time for these school holidays. Enter Now for a chance to win!

Losing yourself to motherhood

While watching your baby grow into a unique little person is exciting and wondrous, the intensity of meeting everyone else?s needs can ever so sneakily overtake your own needs for self-care.

Tearing during delivery: the facts

Almost all women will experience bruising, grazing or tearing after a vaginal birth. Depending on the degree of tearing, there are various treatments available.

6 tips for a day out with a baby and toddler

Outings can be lots of fun with the kids, but there are inevitable challenges. Here's some information about days out to help you be a little more prepared.

Why I invited a dozen people to watch my son's birth

I sent invitations on burgundy scrapbooking paper stamped with a field of poppies, and told each person why I wanted him or her there. I warned that there would be nudity.

Getting labour started: tips for a natural induction

When your baby?s due date comes and goes without so much as a pop - let alone a bang - it can be disheartening. Mums and a doula share their stories of natural inductions.

7 mistakes old hands make with new babies

As I sat across the table from my friend ? me, a seasoned mother of three; her, a brand new mum ? I thought of all the mistakes an old-hand parent can make when visiting a newborn baby.

That's my boy: a dad's diary of the first 4 months

Unbearable anxiety, unspeakable joy, constant exhaustion and bouts of frustration ... The many shocks of first-time fatherhood resound in a dad's diary of his son's early months.

One of the most important things a new mum can do

Finances may not be as cute as a newborn, but with many women?s working arrangements changing post-baby, monetary matters need attention too.

'I wanted a heart over the i'

After naming her other daughter Princess Tiaamii, glamour model Katie Price needed a special name for her new baby.

Personalised baby gifts

We've scoured the internet to find gorgeous personalised keepsakes and nursery decor to record baby name and dates. They make great gifts for christenings, name days and birthdays! (All prices in AU.)

 

Reader offer

2 FOR 1 TICKET OFFER

For Shopping, For Advice, For Baby & You. Enjoy a special day out with fabulous shopping from over 200 brands, leading parenting experts offering advice on a range of topics, and amazing children?s entertainment

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.