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Clumsy Dad may have hurt baby?


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#1 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:02 PM

So my husband is pretty clumsy and he accidently hurts me all the time but this morning he got up from bed and put his whole weight on my uterus with his elbow and it hurt like anything. It literally felt like it was going to fall out from the pressure.

Ever since I have been cramping. He is allot heaiver than me (like 45 kilo heavier) and is a big guy.

Should I be expecting a miscarriage soon? Initially I kept getting really sharp pains for about 3 hours then it changed to a bad period pain feeling.

Really bummed out about it sad.gif He has accidently hurt me several times at night in that area but not too bad  and its driving me insane I just want to wrap myself up in bubblewrap

#2 ubermum

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:08 PM

How far along are you?

Your husband needs to learn to be more careful. There is a little, defenceless person coming along soon. The way you describe him, I am picturing a giant clumsy toddler.

#3 SophieBear

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:08 PM

Oh my gosh OP! How far along are you?

I'd go to the hospital.. how could he miss the bed and put his weight on your body?!

Perhaps sleep apart.

Please take care of yourself! I hope all is ok.

#4 seashells

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:09 PM

How did he accidentally put his whole weight on your belly OP?  Seems a very strange thing....
Are you sure everything is ok?  If not please contact a support service in your state, happy to send you links if you need them.

How many weeks along are you?

Babies are certainly very well protected in the womb, but I would be going to the hospital for a check up in your situation, as abdominal trauma could (but may not) impact on your baby.

#5 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:17 PM

I'm only 6 weeks along. I promise you he is actually a VERY loving caring person and he would never hurt me on purpose and he felt extremely guilty and apologised. Perhaps it wasn't his whole weight I guess - but I mean he was pushing himself up from the bed and kinda slipped and elbowed me - Its really hard to explain lol it happened very quickly and I didn't actually see exactly what has happened and argh I assume at least half of the weight went on there but it felt like allot more.


I haven't talked about it much to him becasue I feel so sorry for the guy - it would wreck him if I even suggested he had casued a miscarriage if it happens. I told him everything will be fine.

Its only 6 weeks so I felt like going ot the hospital would be fruitless becasue they won't be able to save the baby sad.gif It actually concerns me a bit more that I' only 6 weeks as there isn't that much protection compared to further on...




#6 Feral-as-Meggs

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:18 PM

Are you OK?  Your 2 posts this evening don't seem to go together.

I'm pretty sure at 6 weeks the baby is way down in your pelvis and behind your bladder etc, and is very well cushioned.

Edited by meggs1, 12 January 2013 - 06:21 PM.


#7 ubermum

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:21 PM

At 6weeks, it's quite likely he wouldn't have done much damage. There is a lot of other tissues and structures around that area that will offer you some protection. You are right though, there isn't anything that can be done at this stage except waiting to see and training that big oaf to be more careful.

#8 Freddie'sMum

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:22 PM

OK - OP - your post is raising red flags with me.

Firstly you mention that your DH is "clumsy" and "accidentally hurts me all the time".  He also weighs 45kgs more than you - that's a hell of a lot of more weight.

I don't know how far along you are with your pregnancy but for your DH to put all his weight onto you - your uterus - is just plain strange.  Occasionally DH or I will accidentally knock against each other, but you damn well know that you have hit / touched another person - and you very quickly move and apologise.

Go to your OB / doctor / midwife and please get checked out.

Suggest to your DH that he sleeps in another bed until his "cluminess" is sorted out.



#9 gmc88

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:27 PM

Hi hanz33,
Just wanted to say I hope everything is ok with bubby, accidents happen hheart.gif

#10 noonehere

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:34 PM

I hope bub is ok

#11 MummySmiles

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:39 PM

She said he was pushing himself out the bed and slipped and elbowed her... Jeez everything doesn't have to be suss all the time. Accidents happen!

#12 katrina24

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:40 PM

I think at 6 weeks your uterus is still tucked safely behind your pubic bone. But, if you have any concerns, definitely seek medical advice.

#13 Velvetta

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:42 PM

I think the red flags people are talking about are that maybe your DH wants you to miscarriage. Sorry to be so blunt and forgive me if i'm wrong. Definitely start sleeping in another bed to protect yourself and your child. It is also highly unlikely that your babe is hurt at 6 weeks unless the full 45 kilos was impressed.  t is also normal to have pains and aches and even small bleeds at 6 weeks. And if you do miscarriage, it is not necessarily his fault as this is also very common before 12 weeks.
Best wishes x

#14 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:43 PM

QUOTE (Freddie'sMum @ 12/01/2013, 06:22 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
OK - OP - your post is raising red flags with me.

Firstly you mention that your DH is "clumsy" and "accidentally hurts me all the time".  He also weighs 45kgs more than you - that's a hell of a lot of more weight.

I don't know how far along you are with your pregnancy but for your DH to put all his weight onto you - your uterus - is just plain strange.  Occasionally DH or I will accidentally knock against each other, but you damn well know that you have hit / touched another person - and you very quickly move and apologise.

Go to your OB / doctor / midwife and please get checked out.

Suggest to your DH that he sleeps in another bed until his "cluminess" is sorted out.


Oh sad.gif  I am really sorry I am making this sound like he is an awful person honestly he is a wonderful guy and it may not have been his full weight I should have said 'felt like his full weight' but it was probably allot less then that. He did move very quickly it was a very quick heavy jab and he did apologise.


Honestly in no way is my husband an abuser he is just so clumsy. E.G he will forget how close I am to  him in bed and shift backwards and hit my boobs  and get my boobs all the time! OUCH! but it is a complete acccident but because he is allot heavier than me it is allot of weight on me.


I am not here to berate him in anyway he is a wonderful guy and infact thought I looked a bit tired and sent me to bed while he makes me dinner which he actually cooks more than me + works more than me etc. Honestly he is an amazing man - I was just explaining the situation :/ Sorry to lead you guys to believe he is something he isn't.

#15 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:47 PM

QUOTE (Rawr @ 12/01/2013, 06:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I was kicked in the guts by goats at five months once, and had cramping etc. Everything was fine, but I did ring my midwife. OP, always raise ANY doubts with your medical people, be it a doctor, midwife, whatever.

And your partner needs to be more careful


Oh its good to here everything turned out fine original.gif

I agree he does nad he is trying so hard - I  was contimplating just the other day if I should sleep in the other bed.

QUOTE (ann** @ 12/01/2013, 06:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
She said he was pushing himself out the bed and slipped and elbowed her... Jeez everything doesn't have to be suss all the time. Accidents happen!


Thank you!!! It is deffinately nothing sus.

#16 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:48 PM

QUOTE (Velvetta @ 12/01/2013, 06:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I think the red flags people are talking about are that maybe your DH wants you to miscarriage.


Nope. He was the one wanting a baby for years original.gif

#17 *maddierose*

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:49 PM

QUOTE
Sorry to lead you guys to believe he is something he isn't.


Op maybe you could of worded it better but you have nothing to be sorry for. I interpreted your post the way you intended, a lot of ebers just read things into posts that are not there.

Best of luck with your pregnancy, bub should be fine from this as they are well cushioned at an early stage.

#18 password123

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:49 PM

Don't worry OP, I get you. My husband did a similar thing to me in bed during my tww after our ivf cycle. It hurt my poor belly so much and I was convinced our embryo wouldn't implant, but she's currently whingeing for booby right now, so she's ok wink.gif
Accidents happen. Men can be clumsy. So can I. I've accidentally hurt him far more than he me!

#19 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:51 PM

QUOTE (Mrs_Snorks @ 12/01/2013, 06:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Don't worry OP, I get you. My husband did a similar thing to me in bed during my tww after our ivf cycle. It hurt my poor belly so much and I was convinced our embryo wouldn't implant, but she's currently whingeing for booby right now, so she's ok wink.gif
Accidents happen. Men can be clumsy. So can I. I've accidentally hurt him far more than he me!


Thank you so much. I can stop stressing =D

#20 Soontobegran

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:53 PM

Your baby isn't in your abdomen at 6 weeks, it is protected behind your pelvic bone so his pressing will do nothing to your baby however he could well bruise other organs if he is not more careful.
Into different beds for sure and I think he needs to address his clumsiness before your baby arrives.
Good luck.

#21 BetteBoop

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:54 PM

My DH is the same. It doesn't help that I have the grace of the 3 legged pregnant cow.

I'm glad you're okay OP. I feel down the stairs twice in my third trimester and the baby was fine.

Fortunately they're clumsy proof in there  wink.gif

QUOTE (Rawr @ 12/01/2013, 06:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I was kicked in the guts by goats at five months once


I feel like there's a potentially amusing story that needs to be told here....

#22 hanz33

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:57 PM

QUOTE (Ferdinand @ 12/01/2013, 06:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I know exactly what you mean by clumsy and being accidentally hurt. DP is the same, has next to no awareness of his body's movement in space and regularly misjudges distances, positioning of limbs etc. Even attempts at affection can be fraught due to him misjudging where his body is in relation to mine - I'd cop an elbow in the forehead instead of an arm around my shoulder or we'd clonk heads instead having a kiss.

We often joke about the time he whacked his front tooth so hard into my forehead that he actually drew blood, yet his tooth was fine.

I wouldn't have put it past him to accidentally do the same thing your partner did when I was pregnant, he is that much of a clutz.

Anyway, I hope you and the baby are ok with a bit of rest. They're pretty well padded in there even early on.



lol this sounds exactly like my hubby - our first kiss was him misjudgeing and smashing my teeth with his teeth! Romantic wink.gif

#23 katrina24

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:58 PM

I also didn't see anything odd about your DH accidentally injuring you in bed. My hubby is lovely too but has whacked me in the head during sleep a few times over the years. Once he even busted my lip - just an arm thrown the wrong way while sleeping, nothing suss here at all.

Edited by katrina24, 12 January 2013 - 06:58 PM.


#24 ~sydblue~

Posted 12 January 2013 - 07:10 PM

Oh FGS the guy is clumsy. Yes he should be more carefull with his pregnant wife, but to crucify the guy and say he is either abusive or wanting her to miscarry is just disgusting.

Just reminds me about how hated men can be on this site.

#25 jill1972

Posted 12 January 2013 - 07:32 PM

OP I was 8 wks pg with my IVF twins when my dd jumped on my tummy.  I copped a very heavy hit & I was absolutely terrified something bad was going to happen.  I phoned the nurses & they assured me that it would take a lot more than to hurt my bubs (& I had 2 in there).  They explained that there was a lot of protective surrounding tissues etc.  Nothing bad happened.  I hope all is well with you.


_______




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