Jump to content

Help - potential DOCS situation


  • Please log in to reply
16 replies to this topic

#1 opethmum

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:10 PM

Ok this happened this afternoon.

I was minding my own business and got on my bus route and some lady was jabbering quite loudly on her phone about trying to get her kids back from foster care and she was saying that her children were not happy at all. I was quite sad for her having to plead on the phone to whoever was on the phone to have her case looked at by the courts, she then proceeded to hang up. She then proceeded to make another phone call.

It went a little like this, she told the other person on the line that she wanted to kill with knives and do harm upon them on her next visit to the foster carers and those involved in taking her children away, she wanted their eyes to be bathed in the blood of the innocent, she wanted those responsible to make their souls clean and wanted to kill the police workers and damn their souls in everlasting hellfire. She wanted to cause everlasting harm to the judges and the courts and kill them in their sleep.
She was really freaking me out and I could not believe what I was hearing.

Should I take my concerns to the police or should I just stay out of it?

#2 protart roflcoptor

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:14 PM

Perhaps the mental health issues that made her say those things are well known to the team involved in her case and could even form part of the reasons she does not currently have care of her children?



#3 mitty82

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:18 PM

It went a little like this, she told the other person on the line that she wanted to kill with knives and do harm upon them on her next visit to the foster carers and those involved in taking her children away, she wanted their eyes to be bathed in the blood of the innocent, she wanted those responsible to make their souls clean and wanted to kill the police workers and damn their souls in everlasting hellfire. She wanted to cause everlasting harm to the judges and the courts and kill them in their sleep.
She was really freaking me out and I could not believe what I was hearing.


that is probably why she hasnt got her children, do you even know her name??

This is a surefire way to go about threatening people with this sort of stuff that isnt going to help her case. I feel sorry for any of the workers who have to deal with this person and her children.

#4 Caitlin Happymeal

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:19 PM

I don't know tbh - I mean, how easily identifiable would she have been? It sounds like a very very sad situation, but I don't know if you'd be able to give them much to go on really...

#5 pol

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:19 PM

I would. The worst that could happen is they'll laugh at you. The best is worth it.

If it made you uncomfortable listening, then there was a reason for it.

#6 opethmum

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:21 PM

I don't have her name unfortunately and I am worried about the foster carers, who knows if she will carry through her threat.


#7 Feral_Pooks

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:22 PM

She sounds very unwell and I'm sure the people involved are aware of it. If it would put your mind at ease, make a report to crime stoppers.

#8 Zephie Chugger

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:28 PM

As a foster parent Ive heard this many times, Bio parents vent in many ways. Could be a mental health issues or not Im sure the Dept have already heard her wishers and are dealing with it.

#9 MARsmum

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:28 PM

As a previous DoCS worker I would say that these are pretty stock standard things that are said.  It is a sad situation, however, many parents can not take responsibility for their behaviour and therefore blame all the other people involved for their situation and then threaten to do harm.  I think there is little that you can do in this case seeing as though you don't have her name and I am sure that DoCS are probably aware of her situation.

#10 wanting_more

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:28 PM

You know what, I would call DOCS in your area and tell them. Give them as MUCH detail as possible even a description of the lady. (If you know which bus st she got on, or off)
They MAY be able to work out who she is, if its a repeat of past behavior based on description, locations etc. and you know what, even if they can't you can rest easier at night knowing you did something.
I've made a report about someone I didn't know based on what a family member said ( as the family member wasn't going to do anything) I told them what I knew (which wasnt much) and they were very greatful. I thought they would think I was stupid reporting hearsay but I was very worried about what was said. I didn't even know the mother last name or address.
I say do it, it REALLY can't hurt, but it certainly CAN help.

#11 librablonde

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:43 PM

QUOTE (opethmum @ 10/01/2013, 06:21 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I don't have her name unfortunately and I am worried about the foster carers, who knows if she will carry through her threat.

OP, it sounds like she's very mentally unwell and if I were you I'd call the DOC's number in your State and give a description of her when reporting it. The woman may not have been a foster carer through DOC's (perhaps a private agency) but at least you've tried. I'd call the police too.

As a foster carer, I have been on the receiving end of bio-parents with serious mental health issues and threats of abduction or violence. I had to have sensor lights installed at my old house as a precaution and my kid's case manager would call me when the dad was having an "episode". I totally agree that the child protection system is broken in many ways and is a damaging process for all side: the carers, the bio-parents and the poor kids. At the same time, I also know that carers can feel like "sitting ducks" when they have kids in their care and the bio-parent is making threats.... the police and DOC's won't do much until after the fact.... sad.gif


#12 Tigerdog

Posted 10 January 2013 - 05:47 PM

Meh - stay out of it.  Go and google 'DoCS NSW name and shame', you'll get a taste there for the type of nutbag you'd be dealing with (kids obviously taken off her for good reason!).  

Anyway, to do harm to the foster carers she'd have to find out who they are first.

Edited by Tigerdog, 10 January 2013 - 05:47 PM.


#13 librablonde

Posted 10 January 2013 - 06:28 PM

QUOTE (Tigerdog @ 10/01/2013, 06:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Anyway, to do harm to the foster carers she'd have to find out who they are first.

In my case, DOC's told me that the bio-parents had the right to know where their children were placed so our location was not confidential. I was furious when I found out  that my address (not my name) had been given to the dad but when I escalated it to my case worker's manager, I was told in no uncertain terms that I had no right to confidentiality and that almost all bio-parents are advised of the address that their kids are placed at. I was fuming. And also scared when the dad started making terrible threats against the kids and me.


#14 opethmum

Posted 10 January 2013 - 07:19 PM

Thanks ladies, I will call DOCS and report her. Thanks for giving me additional things I was not aware of! Take care for now



#15 olikat03

Posted 10 January 2013 - 07:27 PM

Maybe she knew you were evesdropping and said all that stuff to scare the crap out of you. I think mind your own business would be a good thing. I'm sure if the kids are in foster care they are already been looked after and DOCS are involved.

#16 opethmum

Posted 10 January 2013 - 08:22 PM

Trust me I was not eavesdropping, I had my 6 mo son with me and I needed to keep him occupied,

#17 Propaganda

Posted 10 January 2013 - 08:23 PM

She may be someone who likes to say things like that when she's angry. It doesn't necessarily mean anything.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Abbott's childcare changes will 'reduce access and add complexity'

The government's childcare assistance package threatens to confuse and intimidate many parents, experts say.

Be careful what you wish for

Remember that chubby little baby who rocked on all fours? Remember how you wished he would start to crawl? Then remember how you felt once he did?

William Tyrrell's parents plead for information as anniversary looms

As the one-year anniversary of William Tyrrell's disappearance draws near, the missing four-year-old's parents have again pleaded with the public for information that could help bring their son home.

Family sleepovers: a tribute to my 1970s childhood

My memories of those nights in my childhood are all about fun: sleepover excitement, staying up late, watching movies we probably weren't supposed to watch ... freedom.

43 minutes of terror: family's agonising wait for ambulance for toddler

It was terrifying. As the minutes ticked by little Cooper Harrison's parents felt more and more frantic.

What not to say to a new mum

Some phrases just pop out before you really think about them, but there are some things you should try to not say to a new mum.

Mummydesking: the new hotdesking

It is a paradise that only working parents of small children can understand: a place to sit for three hours without any interruptions while someone looks after the kids.

Charlize Theron adopts baby girl

A few months after splitting from Sean Penn, the actress Charlize Theron has adopted a baby girl.

Facebook CEO Mark Zuckerberg shares painful truth behind wife's pregnancy

Facebook chief executive Mark Zuckerberg has shared a brutally honest truth about pregnancy in the hope it will help others through dark periods.  

Sugary drinks blamed for removal of toddlers' rotten teeth

Children as young as 18 months are having multiple rotten teeth pulled out as parents feed toddlers soft drinks through sipper bottles, and chocolate biscuits and Milo as bedtime treats.

Mum accidentally fake tans baby

Many of us have fallen foul of a bad fake tan or two, but this little guy's started a bit earlier than most.

Does this three-month-old say 'I love you'?

YouTube user Ted Moskalenko was filmed by his wife, Michelle, as his baby son, Ben, engaged in some baby chat.

Kids break out of daycare centre, cross busy highway

Two children broke out of an early childhood centre and wandered across a four-lane road.

Why I'm glad to be an indulgent granny

The phone calls started a couple of weeks ago. At about 5.30 each evening - if I am lucky - I will be greeted by a sweet, excited voice declaring: "'Allo Annie".

Newborn found in toilet at German airport

A newborn baby found abandoned and extremely ill in a bathroom in the Munich airport is doing well.

Is this the worst relationship advice ever published?

You sometimes have to wonder whether relationship/sex advice from magazines is designed to help or humiliate.

How you talk to your baby now can impact social skills later

People used to think that social skills were something kids were born with, not taught.

Three truths about C-section mums

Lately I've been thinking about the caesarean stories and the brave women who birth their children with strength and beauty.

Scientists predict when you should start a family

Scientists have calculated at exactly what age you need to start trying to get pregnant to have the best chance of realising your dream. 

Differently abled child

When 'protecting' a child is really a cover for judgement

Why are people so concerned for this happy child and his mother?

Get your FREE Baby & Toddler Show ticket!

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

When toddlers have strange obsessions

When it comes to two-year-olds and birthday cakes there are a few requests that are usually at the top of the list. But a cake featuring a local personal injury lawyer?

When Mama Bear strikes

When we become mums, our instinct to protect our children and keep them safe from harm is so strong we're often likened to a Mama Bear protecting her cubs.  

Immunity boosters for kids

There are no guaranteed ways to avoid the dreaded winter illnesses completely, but there are ways we can boost our children's immunity.

Yes, you can get pregnant before your period returns post-baby

After giving birth, the last thing you want to think about is contraception. But you can get pregnant before your period comes back.

Mum shares portrait of her proudly breastfeeding three-year-old

Jade Beall usually chooses to breastfeed her son, now 3, in private. This week, however, she shared portraits of her breastfeeding her preschooler.

Dealing with a toddler's morning tantrums

Your schedule is not important to your two-year-old, and you cannot convince her otherwise. So what can you do?

My baby's first seizure

It was 1am on a cold winter's night when I woke suddenly to the screams of my 12-month-old son. Our lives were about to change forever.

MP breastfeeds baby during parliamentary session

An Argentinian mum and politician has caused a stir on social media after being filmed breastfeeding her baby.

Heartbreaking moment mum kisses her one-week-old goodbye

At 11.07am on April 2 this year, Sarah Marriott welcomed baby Sebastian into the world.

The best age to get married (according to the latest study)

Not too young, and not too old. That's reportedly the best age to get married. Not everyone agrees.

Fellow diner rewards mum after toddler's tantrum

Parents of toddlers everywhere know the feeling. After working up the courage to take your child out for lunch or dinner in public you are rewarded with a mid-meal meltdown. 

IVF gender selection being considered for Australian parents

Couples using IVF may be able to choose the gender of their babies and women could be financially compensated for donating their eggs.

The amazing Tee Pee bed and kid-friendly Frankie Bunk bed

These kids' beds definitely fit the brief of providing personality and personal space for little people who are moving up in the world.

The funny things kids say when you're pregnant

Since becoming noticeably pregnant, my son has taken more of an interest in the sibling he'll soon have.

The real problem with having one child

In this age of political correctness, it seems the one subject still subject to discrimination is that of the Only Child.

The fire hazard in more than 70,000 Australian homes

So far, 206 Samsung washing machines have caught fire and some have exploded. But many remain in people's homes.

How having a baby can bring on OCD

We all know that having a baby can turn your life upside down - and it can also bring a raft of new anxieties and worries.

IKEA begins massive safety campaign after two toddler deaths

Two children were killed when pieces from their Malm furniture line tipped over.

Which beauty treatments are safe in pregnancy?

Is it safe to use fake tan, hair dye and nail varnish during pregnancy?

A dad's guide to hyperemesis

I am in no way qualified to advise women on how to cope with hyperemesis, but I've learnt some lessons that might be worth sharing with other partners.

The five ways I know my 'baby' is no longer a baby

The truth is, I can no longer deny that my walking, babbling, somewhat-independent little miss is no longer a bona fide 'baby'.

 

FREE TICKET

See Pinky McKay live in Sydney

Get your free ticket to The Essential Baby & Toddler Show and save $20 - register online now!

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.