Jump to content

Middle of the Night Tantrums
And some other stuff....


  • Please log in to reply
4 replies to this topic

#1 Rumply

Posted 10 January 2013 - 08:21 AM

Hi people, I am sure this is going to be similar to other posts I have read about this, but maybe with a bit more of an individual spin.

Like most people, I am having some trouble with my toddler.... in particular sleeping and not wanting daddy.

DS is in day care full time, has just gone back this week, so I understand he is out of sorts with his routine etc still. However, this stuff has progressively been getting worse for a few months.

I also have a 5 month old baby, so I assume some of this is because he wants attention.

So, the issues are:

- Is really hard to get into bed at night. We have always gone to bed at 8, but the process has now been pushed out to 9 and he generally is asleep by 9:30. He is resisting his naps at day care, but he really needs to have them too. (We thought it might be because he was scared of the dark, so recently added a lamp, but that makes it easier for him to play for longer).

- During the night he is waking 3 - 4 times, mainly looking for his dummy. He had gotten to a point where he could just find it again and go back to sleep. Now he is waking up and screaming and crying. He wont listen and wont take comfort from DH (who has been the one to go into him for the past 12 months - we are currently trying DH sleeping on a mattress on the floor again, but he was told to leave last night).

- During the night waking, he is asking for me. We have been avoiding me going in to him, but this seems to upset him more. I wonder if he is thinking that daddy is keeping mummy from him and this is why he is getting upset with DH?? But we don't want to give in to him, as we have told him that mummy is asleep and don't want him to think if he chucks a tanty then I will come.

There are other typical behavioural issues going on too... but I think I have bored you all enough now. If you have read this far, thank you. As always, your input is really appreciated!!





#2 Genabee

Posted 10 January 2013 - 08:43 AM

We've had similar issues with our now 19 month old.

She got so bad, she was purposely banging her head on her cot (and she would be black and bruised the next day) and we ended up having her sleep in her port cot until we worked through it.

She would wake several times a night and just scream - she just wanted to be held or to get up and play. She would bite, pinch, scratch, hit....

While the approach I used isn't for everyone, it did work for us. I went back to basics - I would ignore her for 10 to 15 minutes or so, then go in and lie her down, pat her until she was quiet, then leave again (never taking her out of the cot and tried not to talk to her at all). Naturally she would repeat her tanty and some nights (especially early on in the process) she would carry on for several hours! It took a good couple of weeks (and several glasses of wine for Mummy!), but basically I just had to keep at it. The minute I changed my approach or gave in to her, we would be right back at square one. The first three nights were the worst, but then it tapered off to two and then just one wake up and then eventually none.

She now goes to bed about 7pm and sleeps through until about 8am. Uninterrupted. And on the rare occasions she does stir, I go back to basics again (after ruling out dirty nappy, drink of water or sick etc).

Just a thought - I imagine he might be feeling a bit out of sorts with you and the new baby? Do you have any time in the day (maybe just before bed, or first thing in the morning) that is just one on one time with him? Maybe it is worth introducing this (whether it is just a bath or story - something that is just for the two of you), so he doesn't feel left out? Maybe he is feeling like he is getting lumped with Daddy because you are too busy with the new baby?


#3 Natttmumm

Posted 10 January 2013 - 03:36 PM

I wasn't sure how old he is but we went through a phase like this with DD2 just before turning 3. We did find out she had sleep apnoea so could have been that too. We found this out later.
What we did was cut the day sleep to 1 hour at lunch time. Bed is 730pm. She plays around for an hour. During the day we talked about what was expected at night and used a rewards chart. We also found TT was related as she often wet the bed but refused a nappy or pull up.
It was a tough 6 months. It's resolved now. She is older but also had her tonsils etc out. Which helped instantly.
We knew something was up with DD as shed been a perfect sleeper from very early on until that phase


#4 noonehere

Posted 10 January 2013 - 03:44 PM

the ownly thing that worked for DD when she was doing the same was to go in settle her say good night and walk out. repeat as soon as she got worked up.
she now crys now and then but either self settles or settles soon as she hears your voice.

#5 Rumply

Posted 10 January 2013 - 04:41 PM

Thanks for the replies.

I try to have dinner done to an extent that I can play with him when he gets home. I generally do the evening routine with him of bath, stories and bed. I lay with him and we chat and I try to get him to relax, but as soon as I leave he is jumping around again. But I do try to give him as much time as I can

Going back to square one might be the best option too...

hmmmmm.





1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Tot meets his heroes, falls apart with excitement

Two-year-old Quincy finished his potty training last week, and as part of his reward he was able to meet his idols.

Beautiful in our eyes: Georgia's story

I will never deny the fact that grief has a place when you give birth to a child who brings a set of circumstances very different to what you imagined. Because for nine months, I thought I knew my Georgie.

'It's been phenomenal': widower dad of quads thankful for support

There was nothing Erica and Carlos wanted more than a baby.

Vin Diesel names daughter after actor Paul Walker

The actor said there was "no other person" he was thinking about when he chose the name.

How midwives can help women who experience domestic violence

More than half of women who live with abusive partners experience violence during pregnancy.

Mum describes giving birth during Cyclone Pam

A new mother was told she must flee Port Vila hospital with her baby as Cyclone Pam bore down.

6 signs you're done having babies

There were a few signs I'm never going back to the land of maternity jeans, breast pumps and bassinets.

Marta Dusseldorp reveals breastfeeding cost her an acting job

Australian actress Marta Dusseldorp has revealed she was forced to withdraw from a Sydney Theatre Company production because a director did not approve of her breast feeding.

Female celebs (or their babies) with traditionally male names

Looking for a name that's a little bit different for a girl? Turn to names that have been traditionally used for males, as these celebs (or their parents) did.

'If you're anti-immunisation ... take a look at this picture of my son'

Greg Hughes is "an absolute shell of a man" as he and his wife Catherine struggle to come to terms with the loss of their newborn son Riley to whooping cough.

How an extrovert can raise an introvert

Introverts are often misunderstood as shy, and sometimes even rude. A timid child can be difficult to build rapport with, but it's important we nurture their sensitive natures.

Sheryl Sandberg's advice

'Choreplay': Help out at home to get more sex, Sandberg tells men

Forget foreplay. The new and improved route to intercourse is "choreplay" - it's good for your spouse, good for your house, and comes with the imprimatur of feminist du jour Sheryl Sandberg.

How to play with your baby

The first time your child learns a new skill at playtime is very exciting - for both you and your baby! Play is important to your child's development for a variety of reasons - here are some simple ideas for you to try at home.

I'm a single mother by choice

For me, being the best mother I can be means being a mum alone, at least for now. Thinking of my friends with inadequate partners, I wonder why more people don’t choose single motherhood.

Awkward wedding photos

Weird poses, surprise photobombs, bizarre editing: these are the wedding photos that should have never seen the light of day.

Four-week-old baby Riley Hughes dies of whooping cough

The mother of a four-week-old Perth baby who died after contracting whooping cough says her family has been left devastated by the loss of her "gorgeous, sweet" son.

Win a Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom prize pack

To celebrate the April 1 release of Holly's Magic Wand on DVD and Digital, we are giving away five DVD packs featuring the newest installment of Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom Holly's Magic Wand and many more hours of family entertainment! Enter Now!

Oh boy! Video shows family's reaction to baby surprise

Little Peyton Williams thought she was getting a baby sister named Charlee. But the two-year-old has had to settle for a doll dressed in pink after her baby "sister" turned out to be a boy.

How to help build up your baby's immune system

We all know that having a strong immune system is the best way to stay healthy – but what can we do to help it along?

'Nick, you need to call an ambulance': home birth mum's tragic death

A Melbourne mum who died after the home birth of her baby pleaded with her husband to call an ambulance because she felt she was going to die, the Victorian Coroners Court has heard.

When dads believe their baby doesn't 'like' them

Q: My two-month-old baby doesn't like me. He's perfectly content with my wife, but when I try to hold him, he gets upset and cries. I've backed off a little, thinking that he just needs a little time to get used to me, but that doesn't seem to be working. I'm starting to think I'm just not a very good dad. Is it too late for me to build a relationship with my baby?

When was the last time a stranger praised your parenting?

Wouldn’t it be great to get some nice feedback every now and then? After all, everyone likes to hear positive praise, particularly when it comes to parenting.

Special Ticket Offer, Save $8!

The Essential Baby & Toddler Show is back this April! Save $8 off the door price for a limited time only!

15 names on the verge of extinction

If you're looking to revive an older name, or don’t want anything near the top 1000 list, check out these rare monikers for your unique baby.

5 characteristics of great dads

It’s great to see a generation of dads who are more actively involved with caring, nurturing and loving their kids.

Why doesn't Australia have more breast milk banks?

When there’s no question that milk banks are important, why don’t we have more of them in Australia?

Carrie Bickmore announces birth of daughter

Television personality Carrie Bickmore has given birth to her second child.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Sign up to our 30 days of #PlayIQ challenge

Sign up to receive 30 amazing tips and ideas for play with baby during the month of April and submit a picture or tip on our social wall for a chance to win an amazing Fisher-Price prize pack.

Man faces jail after giving woman abortion pill smoothie

A Norwegian man is facing jail after putting abortion pills in his ex-girlfriend's smoothie, causing her to have a miscarriage.

'He's a blessing': family of baby born without eyes

Jordy Jackson was born without eyes. He has anophthalmia, which affects one in every 100,000 babies born.

Super fit model Sarah Stage defends her pregnancy body

Model Sarah Stage has defended her pregnancy body after critics claimed her slim figure at eight-and-a-half months pregnant wasn't "normal".

Win a Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom and Peppa Pig prize pack

To celebrate the April 1 release of Holly's Magic Wand on DVD and Digital, Essential Baby and Entertainment One are giving away five bumper DVD packs featuring the newest installment of Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom Holly's Magic Wand and many more hours of family entertainment! Enter Now!

Why I post breastfeeding photos online

I love to take pictures of my children. In some of the pictures, my younger son is nursing.

The day I broke my baby

There are things I wish I didn't know. I wish I didn't know that companies make tiny braces, small enough to hold necks no bigger than a wrist.

The place just for dads of multiples

When a couple discovers they're expecting multiples, the dad can sometimes be almost forgotten in all the excitement and preparation. But one group offers a space just for dads of twins and higher-order multiples.

Brave mum calls for domestic violence law reform

A brave mum of two has shared details of the harrowing attacks she suffered at the hands of her partner in a bid to help other victims of domestic violence.

Why I had the new test for Down syndrome

Early last year I turned 35, and having just found out I was pregnant, I opted to have the new test for Down syndrome.

Geeky baby gear

If your family is more into Star Wars, gaming and the periodic table than most, you might want to check out these geek-chic baby items.

2015: the year of the sheep

According to the Chinese zodiac, babies born in the year of the sheep are creative and enjoy spending quiet time with their own thoughts.

Breakthrough genetic testing now available in Australia

Pregnant women will for the first time have access to locally analysed, accurate, non-invasive pre-natal genetic testing when the first Australian clinic to offer the services opens its doors next week.

Grandbabies: the babies born looking old

Not a day under 65 and a lifetime of struggle! That's the look of these newborns, who look adorably older than their real age. Social networking site Reddit recently featured user submissions of adorable grandbabies, here are our favourites.

Family kicked off flight after toddler seatbelt drama

An entire family was kicked off a Cathay Pacific flight when a misbehaving toddler refused to put his seatbelt on.

Stolen baby found after 17 years

A baby stolen from her mother's arms shortly after birth has been found through an astonishing coincidence.

53 creative pregnancy announcements

Announcing that you're expecting can be a time to express your creativity, sense of humour and imagination. Check out how other parents and parents-to-be have broken the news to friends and family.

IKEA hacks for the nursery and kids' rooms

Are you one of those that know the whole IKEA catalogue by heart? Love their stuff but want to personalise it? Here's some inspiration to help you realise the potential of IKEA furniture and fittings.

36 baby names inspired by food and drinks

A French court may have ruled out Nutella as a baby name, but that doesn't have to stop you from taking inspiration from the supermarket (or bottle shop). See what parents in the US have chosen for their delicious little ones.

Clever breastfeeding products

Check out this range of products designed to help make your breastfeeding journey more enjoyable, manageable and convenient.

 

Sign up now!

30 days of #PlayIQ challenge

Receive a daily email from Essential Baby during April with great play tips and ideas, then submit your baby at play photos to our Playwall, Instagram or Twitter for your chance to win.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.