Jump to content

Middle of the Night Tantrums
And some other stuff....


  • Please log in to reply
4 replies to this topic

#1 Rumply

Posted 10 January 2013 - 08:21 AM

Hi people, I am sure this is going to be similar to other posts I have read about this, but maybe with a bit more of an individual spin.

Like most people, I am having some trouble with my toddler.... in particular sleeping and not wanting daddy.

DS is in day care full time, has just gone back this week, so I understand he is out of sorts with his routine etc still. However, this stuff has progressively been getting worse for a few months.

I also have a 5 month old baby, so I assume some of this is because he wants attention.

So, the issues are:

- Is really hard to get into bed at night. We have always gone to bed at 8, but the process has now been pushed out to 9 and he generally is asleep by 9:30. He is resisting his naps at day care, but he really needs to have them too. (We thought it might be because he was scared of the dark, so recently added a lamp, but that makes it easier for him to play for longer).

- During the night he is waking 3 - 4 times, mainly looking for his dummy. He had gotten to a point where he could just find it again and go back to sleep. Now he is waking up and screaming and crying. He wont listen and wont take comfort from DH (who has been the one to go into him for the past 12 months - we are currently trying DH sleeping on a mattress on the floor again, but he was told to leave last night).

- During the night waking, he is asking for me. We have been avoiding me going in to him, but this seems to upset him more. I wonder if he is thinking that daddy is keeping mummy from him and this is why he is getting upset with DH?? But we don't want to give in to him, as we have told him that mummy is asleep and don't want him to think if he chucks a tanty then I will come.

There are other typical behavioural issues going on too... but I think I have bored you all enough now. If you have read this far, thank you. As always, your input is really appreciated!!





#2 Genabee

Posted 10 January 2013 - 08:43 AM

We've had similar issues with our now 19 month old.

She got so bad, she was purposely banging her head on her cot (and she would be black and bruised the next day) and we ended up having her sleep in her port cot until we worked through it.

She would wake several times a night and just scream - she just wanted to be held or to get up and play. She would bite, pinch, scratch, hit....

While the approach I used isn't for everyone, it did work for us. I went back to basics - I would ignore her for 10 to 15 minutes or so, then go in and lie her down, pat her until she was quiet, then leave again (never taking her out of the cot and tried not to talk to her at all). Naturally she would repeat her tanty and some nights (especially early on in the process) she would carry on for several hours! It took a good couple of weeks (and several glasses of wine for Mummy!), but basically I just had to keep at it. The minute I changed my approach or gave in to her, we would be right back at square one. The first three nights were the worst, but then it tapered off to two and then just one wake up and then eventually none.

She now goes to bed about 7pm and sleeps through until about 8am. Uninterrupted. And on the rare occasions she does stir, I go back to basics again (after ruling out dirty nappy, drink of water or sick etc).

Just a thought - I imagine he might be feeling a bit out of sorts with you and the new baby? Do you have any time in the day (maybe just before bed, or first thing in the morning) that is just one on one time with him? Maybe it is worth introducing this (whether it is just a bath or story - something that is just for the two of you), so he doesn't feel left out? Maybe he is feeling like he is getting lumped with Daddy because you are too busy with the new baby?


#3 Natttmumm

Posted 10 January 2013 - 03:36 PM

I wasn't sure how old he is but we went through a phase like this with DD2 just before turning 3. We did find out she had sleep apnoea so could have been that too. We found this out later.
What we did was cut the day sleep to 1 hour at lunch time. Bed is 730pm. She plays around for an hour. During the day we talked about what was expected at night and used a rewards chart. We also found TT was related as she often wet the bed but refused a nappy or pull up.
It was a tough 6 months. It's resolved now. She is older but also had her tonsils etc out. Which helped instantly.
We knew something was up with DD as shed been a perfect sleeper from very early on until that phase


#4 noonehere

Posted 10 January 2013 - 03:44 PM

the ownly thing that worked for DD when she was doing the same was to go in settle her say good night and walk out. repeat as soon as she got worked up.
she now crys now and then but either self settles or settles soon as she hears your voice.

#5 Rumply

Posted 10 January 2013 - 04:41 PM

Thanks for the replies.

I try to have dinner done to an extent that I can play with him when he gets home. I generally do the evening routine with him of bath, stories and bed. I lay with him and we chat and I try to get him to relax, but as soon as I leave he is jumping around again. But I do try to give him as much time as I can

Going back to square one might be the best option too...

hmmmmm.





1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

WIN an exclusive performance from Sam Moran!

To celebrate the release of children?s musical series Play Along with Sam, out now on DVD, we?re giving one lucky parent the chance to have Sam perform at their child?s pre-school or day care!

The myths and truths of gender swaying

Here are a few popular methods hopeful parents-to-be use to try to get a baby of their preferred gender – and what an expert says about whether they really work.

10 easy DIY Christmas decoration ideas

It's officially time to get into the Christmas spirit. Why not branch out when you put up your tree this year and add a personal touch with a few DIY decorations? We've found the perfect easy-to-make ways to put more festive fever into your home.

The dangerous new trend of glucose challenge test refusal

A dangerous trend is seeing more mothers-to-be declining a relatively simple and painless test to check for gestational diabetes.

Office of Fair Trading reveals naughty toys ahead of Christmas

The Office of Fair Trading has pulled seven toys from shelves ahead of Christmas after they fail safety tests.

Video: Baby boy's trouble with twins

These twin girls will no doubt have fun fooling people in years to come, but nobody will be as confused as baby Landon.

Long-term reversible male contraceptive on its way

Men could soon have access to an injectable long-term contraceptive which works in a similar way to a vasectomy but promises to be easily reversed.

'I tried to kill my baby': one mum's story

After bathing and dressing her three-month-old son, Amanda had a rare moment alone with her baby.

Attack of the 'mummy brain'

I feel that almost every day, someone in my life - be they a friend, family member or complete stranger - feels the need to excuse my behaviour as I have other things on my mind.

Mum of baby who fell ill after drinking raw milk speaks out

A Melbourne mother has described how her son turned grey when he became seriously ill after drinking raw milk.

Australian divorce rate lowest since 1976

Modern newlyweds are now well into their 30s and marriage still offers something powerful a new book argues.

The aftermath of a traumatic birth experience

In Australia, 30 per cent of women find their birth experience traumatic, with 6 per cent going on to develop post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

Young mum burns 'from inside-out'

A young mum is in intensive care after she took a friend's antibiotic and wound up with an ailment that is burning her body 'from the inside-out'.

The disagreement that can break a relationship

If he doesn't change his mind, all I can hope is that I will. It would be a waste to spend the rest of my marriage mourning a baby that never was.

Co-sleeping or no-sleeping? Mum videos worst nap ever

One mother's futile attempt to sleep in caught on camera in a hilarious - and very cute - video.

Why children misbehave during the festive season

While we all like to imagine the holiday season as being a fun, loving and bonding experience; often our reality is quiet different.

I was fat-shamed by my doctor

The fear of being weighed is the most significant factor in women cancelling medical appointments - and now weight-shaming has happened to me.

End of an era: no more childcare

As we reach the end of 2014, we're closing the book on many things for another year, most notably childcare. Our last child has attended childcare for the very last time.

The 7-year itch is more like the 10-year itch: study

Contrary to popular belief, making it past the seven-year mark doesn't mean your marriage will be smooth sailing from there on.

Stop telling us that parenting gets harder

I’m sure that parenting will get harder. But life isn’t exactly smooth sailing for many of us right now, either.

Should children be forced to sit on Santa's lap?

We teach kids it’s okay to say no if they don’t feel safe, so why do some parents force their children to climb in to Santa's lap?

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Baby born weighing almost 14 pounds

Yes, the bouncing baby girl was born by caesarean section. And mum says no more kids.

The dummy debate

I'm the first to admit that when I used to see tiny babies with dummies in their mouths, I thought "Hmm, lazy parenting." And now I apologise.

WIN an exclusive performance from Sam Moran!

To celebrate the release of children?s musical series Play Along with Sam, out now on DVD, we?re giving one lucky parent the chance to have Sam perform at their child?s pre-school or day care!

'I thought I was an only child'

Imagine meeting your double at a school sports event, or regularly being mistaken for someone you haven't met. Separated twins Margaret and Joy tell their story.

Mums reveal their nappy bag essentials

Ever wondered what other mums carry in their nappy bags? We have, so we asked mums to tell us their must-have nappy bag items.

Toddler died because he wasn't given antibiotics soon enough

A 15-month-old boy would almost certainly be alive today if doctors had given him antibiotics sooner, a coroner has ruled.

VIDEO: moment a toddler falls on to train tracks in Melbourne

Shocking footage has emerged capturing the moment a pram carrying a toddler rolled off a platform and onto train tracks in suburban Melbourne.

Sold on natural birth? Read the fine print

In the excitement and anticipation of a first pregnancy, I ignored the fine print: some women, some of the time.

Child with alcoholic mum who drank while pregnant won't win pay-out

A young child is not entitled to criminal injuries compensation after her mother drank excessively while pregnant.

Superbugs killing India's babies, posing wider threat

A deadly epidemic that could have global implications is quietly sweeping India, tens of thousands of newborns dying because antibiotics no longer work.

Can you teach a toddler to sleep in?

Parents share their tips on getting their early risers to sleep in, even for just a little bit longer.

Keeping your relationship on track as new parents

About 70 per cent of couples experience a slump in their relationship within three years of having a baby. Here's how we tried to get back on track.

America's favourite baby names of 2014

Americans are turning to television, Netflix and sports for ideas for what to name their wee ones.

Carers admit to force-feeding children

As Sydney grieves the loss of Sydney siege victims Katrina Dawson and Tori Johnson, reports have suggested that both died as heroes.

 

How many weeks til Christmas?

On your To-Do list

Get the "Santa" shopping done without the kids in tow.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.