Jump to content

Parents of G&T kids - is this plausible?


  • Please log in to reply
24 replies to this topic

#1 The Old Feral

Posted 09 January 2013 - 06:44 PM

A strange thing happened yesterday.

DH has our kids (8 and 7yo) with him this week while I work.  They tagged along while he met a couple to sell them something.

There was a complication which took awhile for DH and the fellow to sort out, and while they did that the lady of the couple kindly amused our DSs with a chat and some games.

After it was all sorted out, the lady told DH she had to speak to him about our kids.  She said she co-ordinates a G&T program at a primary school, and DS2 and possibly DS1 have all the hallmarks of gifted kids, and implored him to chat to me then get in contact with her for more information about having them assessed.

Well, this has come as a complete surprise to us!  Granted my kids are pretty clever, but I've never seen them as especially so.  DS2 is a B and C grade student, dislikes school, only really picked up with his reading in the second half of grade 1.  He hates puzzles and working out problems himself and will cheat if he can, won't apply himself at all to things he's not interested in.  DS1 is better academically, but not exactly streets ahead of where he should be.  No teachers or any other professionals who've worked with them have mentioned anything like this before, and this woman spent less than an hour with them.

So my first instinct is to feel slightly chuffed but conclude that the lady is probably talking bollocks..... but maybe I'm just doing my kids a huge disservice.

WDYT, and how would you react if this happened to you?

#2 tenar

Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:05 PM


Gifted doesn't have to mean "genius".  There are degrees of giftedness and your kids don't have to be composing music aged 3 or whatever to be gifted.  

Some gifted kids fly very much under the radar because they are bored at school.  It can lead to huge problems for them later on because if they aren't challenged enough at school they don't get the opportunity to learn to work hard at something, to persist, to try things that might not work, etc.  These skills are hard to pick up as an adult.

I would suggest that you have nothing much to lose by getting them assessed, and if what you gain is a route to schooling that better suits your kids then that's a huge plus.

Good luck!

#3 IsolaBella

Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:10 PM

Like Tenar I would probably follow up.

Apart from some money and time, not much to lose and the potential to help your kids if the lady is right.

My brother was tested in first grade due to being disruptive in class and not working well. Turns out he was Mensa standard and bored.



#4 The Old Feral

Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:16 PM

QUOTE
My brother was tested in first grade due to being disruptive in class and not working well. Turns out he was Mensa standard and bored.


Well the first part of that describes DS2 pretty well!  And I have a pretty high IQ so perhaps that's part of the reason he doesn't stand out to me.

I appreciate the advice from both of you and you're right, there's no harm in checking it out.  I'm just surprised that if she's right, that it's gone unnoticed by so many and for so long.

#5 SplashingRainbows

Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:18 PM

I would ring her and thank her for her kind words and ask what it was that made them tans out to her

I'm sure she would happily oblige if you explained it was very out of the blue and whilst you appreciate her comments you'd like to know more before spending the time and $$$ on assessments.



#6 schoolmum

Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:20 PM

Its not impossible that they are gifted. They may not be achieving academically as they may be bored at school, or are "dumbing themselves down" to fit in with peers.
Giftedness is not just about a high standard of reading, maths etc, it can be the way they think about things and use that information, what is often called "thinking out side of the box"

I have a gifted son, it was his kindy teacher that recommended that he be assessed, after he lashed out physically at her and another teacher. The results came back as highly gifted, and the kindy made sure that the program was stimulating for him.

I don't know where you are based, so I can only pass on what I know happens in Adelaide regarding assessments. We had ours done through the education dept, by referral from the kindy teacher. It took a few months to happen, but it was free, and also well recognised by the school. We also had our younger son assessed  through the dept a few years latter, with the support of his teacher, as he was showing signs of being gifted but as he was the sort of kid that would "fly under the radar" it was thought to be a good idea to see where he was at. It turned out he wasn't, but it gave us good insight as to what his strengths and weakness in learning were.

I guess if it is something you wish to explore, then when school goes back have a chat to their teachers a few weeks in, once they have had a chance to get to know them. Or if you can talk to last years teachers, and see what they think.

You could also check out your states Gifted and Talented association websites, and see what information they have there.

It will do no harm to look into it, as the worst thing that can happen is the results will come back with them not being gifted. If you are worried what to say to them if they do get assessed, I used to just say that we are finding out how your brain works and learns things, I never told them that they are being assessed for being gifted.

Good luck.



#7 kpingitquiet

Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:28 PM

I would look at some of the criteria for G/T kids of his age group and see if any bells start ringing. Stellar students =/= gifted children. Boredom, distraction, issues with authority, and often even learning difficulties coupled with high IQ can all contribute to Gifted kids under-performing at school. Underachieving in some areas and overachieving in others tends to be more common.

I was assessed as highly gifted in pre-school and was never a remarkable student. Same for my cousin who was assessed at a similar age. We both excelled, with ease, in the subjects we enjoyed. We blew off the rest. His sister, a woman of high intelligence but not meeting the markers for "Gifted," was a straight-A student and is now finishing her PhD at Oxford.

#8 IsolaBella

Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:41 PM

After my brother was tested mum never had me tested (didn't want to have a number to compare kids).

I remember her telling me upon starting high school, to be prepared to go in and out if help maths class as I would need help in that area. Turns out I was the top of the form, constantly getting the mathematics prize. Doing year 12 problems I year 7, 3rd year Uni geometry questions in year 9. I was actually quite bright and superb in visual special arenas.

I did some aptitude testing post school.... Top 99% for all areas.... Except comprehension. I already knew that though.

So not all of us bright ones stand out early.

I am debating whether to get my kids assessed. I have my suspicions my eldest is bright and middle child very bright. School is allowing my 1st grader to do 4th grade maths so there is no real push as such needed ATM. He is being challenged.


#9 baddmammajamma

Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:47 PM

I would follow up, as well -- who knows, she might be onto something! However, if she pushes you really hard to get your childen assessed through a particularl provider ("a dear friend of mine") or pushes on special services she can offer you, I'd be a little wary. wink.gif

The posters above have done a good job of capturing the many reasons why a gifted child might underperform in class (I lovingly call my daughter a "Gifted Slacker").

Interestingly, there is research that indicates that if one sibling has been identified as being intellectually gifted based on psychometric testing (IQ testing), it is very likely that other siblings in the same family will also score in the gifted range (usually within 5-10 points of each other):

http://www.giftedminds.com.au/attachments/Like_Minds.pdf

(Gifted Minds are one of Australia's best known practices for testing and advocating for gifted kids)

Edited by baddmammajamma, 09 January 2013 - 07:48 PM.


#10 The Old Feral

Posted 09 January 2013 - 08:09 PM

Thanks everyone, your replies have shown me that I know very little about what G&T actually means - I had visions of Mozart and 10yos doing university maths.

I'll do some more research and, as suggested, give the lady a call for more info.

A lot of you are saying that being G&T doesn't necessarily equal success at school... so what DOES it mean for children of that age?  If one or both of my children were found to be G&T, what would happen next?  There is no G&T program at their school.



#11 katrina24

Posted 09 January 2013 - 08:14 PM

I would google some information about giftedness.  I always knew DD was bright but wouldn't have necessarily said gifted. But, when I looked though checklists of gifted features it was like reading a page about DD.  

I also agree that classroom performance alone can't be used as a predictor of giftedness. It's hard for your teacher to know you can easily do 84x3 in your head when the task at hand is 6+7 if you know what I mean.  Many gifted kids are early or exceptional readers but again, not all are, so you can't rule it out based on that either.



#12 shine

Posted 09 January 2013 - 08:17 PM

Mmmm - I just posted in G&T thread that I was wondering about DS the younger sibling to his confirmed gifted sister. I reckon he is at least a "bright coaster" and DD is definately a "gifted coaster".

OP - I definately would get them checked out, it really cant hurt.

#13 baddmammajamma

Posted 09 January 2013 - 08:20 PM

The Old Bag: This is a "busy" site, but there's some good Gifted 101 information on it:

http://www.hoagiesgifted.org/



#14 The Old Feral

Posted 09 January 2013 - 08:40 PM

Thanks Quill, I'm going to have to take a break from the computer for now but will get back to you with some questions.  I'm in Victoria.

I had a quick look around your last link, BMJ, and realised that my own IQ score, taken in high school when I was playing up, puts me well into the gifted range.  A fact nobody bothered to share with me at the time! The observations others have made about cruising through school (and life!) ring true.  

Lots to think about.  


#15 Guest_CaptainOblivious_*

Posted 09 January 2013 - 08:54 PM

Is it worth having a child tested if you know the school does no G&T stuff?

We've got no choice in schools (country living at it's finest) and according to DD1s teacher, she tested out as capable of performing at a level 2 years above her grade in both maths and reading. She's basically spent the past 12 months sitting there bored off her nut waiting for the other kids to catch up.

Even though the teacher knew she was bright, there is nothing offered. Have you found that getting your child tested actually made any kind of difference?

How do you go about getting the testing done?

#16 ~ky~

Posted 10 January 2013 - 07:34 AM

My eldest DD was a bright preschooler - reading, writing and spelling well at age three, all self taught. However, when she started school she was never much more than an average student. She sat the gifted and talented program high school exams last year (at 11y 2m) and has gained a place in the program for high school next year.

My DS showed no interest in anything as a preschooler except numbers. He is a just above average student according to his teachers but having home schooled him for 3 terms a couple of years back, I know that he is already working way above his age level and his brain is incredible - if anything, I believe he is much brighter than his sister. However, he also does not test well at all due to aspergers. Hopefully, when he sits the exams next year (they test how your brain works, not what you know) he will test better than usual as he really needs extension as he is bored at school.

DH was an underachiever at school but is very bright although he doesn't believe so. I was a top student who dropped out because I was bored - according to testing when I was 13yo I have an IQ of 142 which I guess is nothing to sneeze at.

#17 Guest_CaptainOblivious_*

Posted 10 January 2013 - 12:56 PM

QUOTE (Quill @ 09/01/2013, 10:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Well, you'll get biased answers to this, but in my experience, the more information you have, the more options you have. It may be that at the school they say that they don't offer any extension, however the more proof you have the better position you're in to negotiate with the school.

that's kind of what I was thinking. She's got a new teacher this year so I will speak to her early on and see what she's willing to do. I was horrified when we got her 'writing' book home at the end of the year and she'd clearly done 1 free writing exercise all year and it was literally one sentence. The rest of her writing book was stuff they'd all had to copy off the board. This is the same kid who happily sat down and wrote an A4 page (notebook lined) letter to her grandparents with only a couple of spelling mistakes. No wonder her effort dropped to practically none by the end of the year.

I will contact the websites you've listed and see about getting some testing done.

#18 SisterMaryElephant

Posted 10 January 2013 - 01:18 PM

Okay, well I'll be the unpopular one to suggest that  a one off conversation is perhaps not something to go crazy over.

When my youngest was about 18 months, a woman at swimming, observing her very well drawn pictures of mermaids, was convinced DD2 was gifted, that I should look into starting her early, etc. All because my little one was an obsessive drawer.  Funnily enough, this woman was also a G & T coordinator at her school.

G&T has become an industry and people in that industry like to talk up the negative aspects of not acting on your child's 'giftedness  They feed on guilt that you're not doing enough for your child.  And if school isn't meeting their needs, or they';re showing signs of being unhappy, fair enough.  But if it's something that has come out of the blue, then I'd read a bit online to see how your kids match up, consider and assess it year by year.

#19 CallMeFeral

Posted 10 January 2013 - 01:28 PM

And here was I clicking to see what Gin & Tonic kids could possibly be.

#20 PrincessPeach

Posted 10 January 2013 - 01:36 PM

Totally plauseable.

Out of 6 grandkids on the maternal side of my family 5 of us are academically G & T. All 3 boys were tested because they were disruptive in class. Turned out they were simply bored senseless.

The acadmeic qualifier on that is because giftedness exists in more than one form.

#21 ednaboo

Posted 10 January 2013 - 04:07 PM

QUOTE (CaptainOblivious @ 09/01/2013, 09:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Is it worth having a child tested if you know the school does no G&T stuff?

We've got no choice in schools (country living at it's finest) and according to DD1s teacher, she tested out as capable of performing at a level 2 years above her grade in both maths and reading. She's basically spent the past 12 months sitting there bored off her nut waiting for the other kids to catch up.

Even though the teacher knew she was bright, there is nothing offered. Have you found that getting your child tested actually made any kind of difference?

How do you go about getting the testing done?

There are G & T services available outside school.  Quill mentioned CHIP, there is also Gateways in Victoria and I believe there are G & T parent-run groups in various regions.  CHIP offers extension in Language and Maths, but not science apparently, which I find odd.  Both CHIP and Gateways offer weekend, after school and holiday programs in Metro areas.  I don't know if they do any regional stuff but it's worth a look.

I would be miffed if school were not making efforts to extend.

OP: my eldest was recently assessed by a neuropsychologist and found to have ADHD as well as being gifted.  His school didn't really identify either issue, as the giftedness partially compensates for the ADHD, but the ADHD means he is achieving nowhere near his potential.  Now that I have the formal assessment I feel I can ask the school to offer him some extension work.  

My DD(5.5) has also been identifed as gifted.  It was her teacher who recommended her for extension (with Gateways).  I don't plan on having her tested at this stage as I don't see the need, but if the school had not identified it I would consider it.

ETA: links

Edited by ednaboo, 10 January 2013 - 04:09 PM.


#22 Guest_CaptainOblivious_*

Posted 10 January 2013 - 06:19 PM

thanks ednaboo. I'll check out the links original.gif

#23 ednaboo

Posted 11 January 2013 - 12:28 PM

CO: this was the Parent Support Groups I was talking about.  This is Victorian but there may be others.

#24 Guest_CaptainOblivious_*

Posted 11 January 2013 - 02:31 PM

QUOTE (ednaboo @ 11/01/2013, 01:28 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
CO: this was the Parent Support Groups I was talking about.  This is Victorian but there may be others.
Fantastic. Thanks original.gif I've been following the links all over the place and there is a branch in the NSW version which is not too far from us.


#25 ednaboo

Posted 12 January 2013 - 10:40 AM

Also should have posted this: Gifted Resorces.  This page has been updated more recently.  original.gif




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Heartwarming prank gives single mum the house she was hired to clean

Cara Simmons arrived at work to clean a large and beautiful house in time for a party planned for that evening. It was soon hers.

Why we should stop telling new parents to 'enjoy every moment'

A few weeks ago, some dear friends of mine had their first baby. As the proud dad texted me a picture I had to fight the natural instinct to say “Enjoy every moment!”

Transgender dad breastfeeds his babies

A transgender man who breastfed his first baby - despite having his breasts removed as part of his transformation from female to male - has now had a second child.

Couple face $1 million medical bill and bankruptcy after babymoon birth

A Canadian couple were slammed with a million dollar medical bill after their daughter was prematurely during their babymoon.

Win one of 5 Little Tikes Cozy Coupe Sport

Australia?s No 1 selling car is now available in a Sports model and we have 5 to give away to some lucky Essential Baby families.

Cigarettes, junk food dominate supermarket sales growth

One in every five dollars spent at supermarkets goes on cigarettes or junk food, according to industry data.

Teacher under fire for breastfeeding in class

There is no doubt mums have a right to continue breastfeeding after they have returned to work, but one teacher in the US has taken it to the extreme.

Video: Baby sniffs beardless dad to make sure it's him

She looks him up and down and then touches his chin, but baby Lindsey still isn't sure this clean-shaven man is her dad.

The tragedy of losing a favourite teddy bear

We were green and uninitiated, perhaps a little naïve when it came to the favourite toy responsibility.

It's possible to workout while pregnant

Medical experts say intense fitness routines can be done safely during pregnancy - if the mums-to-be follow some guidelines.

Baby for Asher Keddie and Vincent Fantauzzo

Fans followed every step of her on-screen pregnancy in Offspring, now Asher Keddie is going to be a mum in real life too.

What parents really want for their kids

Are our hopes, dreams and expectations for our children what they really need?

'I had a feeling something was seriously wrong': the fight for Kaden's diagnosis

Before even giving birth, Katie Myers' maternal instincts warned her something was wrong with her baby.

When your pregnancy causes a relationship rift

Some dads-to-be don't miss a beat when their partner is pregnant; others struggle with a range of issues and can become withdrawn, right when their support is needed most.

Couple uses group photo trick to announce pregnancy to loved ones

Katharine and Kris Camilli devised a clever trick to immortalise their family and friends' reaction to their exciting pregnancy news.

Why Tracey Spicer has given up make-up

"After 30 years on television, I had become what I despised: a painted doll who spent an hour a day and close to $200 a week putting on a mask."

Empowering bikini photo of 46-year-old mum goes viral

When a group of teenagers made rude remarks about her body as she walked past them in a bikini at the local beach, Julie Cross refused to cover up.

Devastated widow discovers she's pregnant the day before husband's funeral

They had been trying to conceive a baby for seven years. Tragically Kristy Kirchner found out she was pregnant the day before her husband Royce's funeral.

Win a family pass to Disney Live!

We have 4 family passes to give away to see Disney Live! presents Three Classic Fairy Tales, touring Australia this December/January.

Gabriella Goat sues Peppa Pig

Every toddler's favourite television pig is being sued by an Italian woman who shares a name with a Peppa Pig character.

Meet the Mpregs, the male pregnancy enthusiasts

"Men can't have babies - that's something only women can do! But our community is full of like-minded people who wish otherwise."

Your new motherhood survival kit

Forget about the bright, pretty baby things - while you're in survival mode, all you'll need are the essentials.

More than 100,000 cars recalled globally after death of pregnant woman

The announcement of a mass recall comes as Malaysian police investigate the death of pregnant woman in July.

I had a 'good baby' but still suffered from postnatal depression

I had a much wanted precious baby girl, a 'good baby' who slept well, self settled and was mostly content. It just seemed implausible to think I could succumb to depression.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Win one of 5 Little Tikes Cozy Coupe Sport

Australia?s No 1 selling car is now available in a Sports model and we have 5 to give away to some lucky Essential Baby families.

Join PADDINGTON on the red carpet!

To celebrate the release of PADDINGTON, we are giving five lucky winners the chance to win a family pass to the exclusive Australian Premiere in Sydney on December 7!

Knowing you are one of the lucky ones

I am secure, confident and strong, but the responsibility of protecting my children can almost bring me undone.

Why I am so emotional now I have kids?

There are so many ways in which parenthood changes us as women, but one of the most noticeable, for me, has been the changing state of my emotions.

Baby survives despite sharing womb with 'foreign body'

Baby Maia was conceived against the odds, only to find she was sharing a womb with an ominous "foreign body".

Video: Baby shows dog how to jump - or vice versa

They say dog is man's best friend, but this playful pooch seems to have chosen a jumping baby as her number one buddy.

10 ways to soothe a crying baby

New paernts can get frustrated when their newborn gets fussy and can't settle down. When you're feeling overwhelmed, try some of these simple tips to help soothe your baby.

20 baby names that are becoming more popular every year

The data-lovers at nameberry.com have been at it again – this time, they’ve discovered the names that are continually rising up the ranks, ready to take out some top spots in the next few years.

10 great meals to make for new parents

Ideally, you want to give food that isn’t expensive to make, isn't too difficult to create, and freezes well; stews, bakes, soups and pasta sauces are perfect.

'It's not you, it's me': Boston bombing survivor mum to have leg amputated

Rebekah DiMartino is going through a break-up. She even wrote a farewell love letter. But it's not to her husband.

What it's like to go through early menopause

In a cruel twist, Carla had been breastfeeding and perimenopausal at the same time. But she's far from the only one to go through menopause early.

Restaurant served alcohol to two-year-old

Busy restaurants can be forgiven for getting food and drink orders mixed up from time to time, but not when the confusion leads to a two-year-old being served an alcoholic cocktail instead of the child-friendly beverage they ordered.

Julia Morris tells of miscarriage on a flight

Julia Morris has spoken about the devastation of suffering a miscarriage while on an international flight.

Woman's survival after birth 'a story of two miracles'

A US mother is home and tending to her new baby less than a month after surviving without a pulse for 45 minutes.

Eating ice may give mental boost to the iron deficient: study

A new study proposes that, like a strong cup of coffee, ice may give those with insufficient iron a much-needed mental boost.

Tiny lives in caring hands: Thank U NICU Day

Each year in Australia, over 40,000 newborns need the help of a special care nursery or neonatal intensive care unit. One day a year, the staff are honoured by the parents they help through those dark days.

I paid $50,000 to have a girl

This time my husband and I hadn't taken any chances. We had paid $50,000 and travelled 13,000 kilometres to make sure the baby growing inside me was female.

Weird pregnancy products

Some pregnancy products come to market and are just awesome. Others just leave you scratching your head.

Dear firstborn, I'm sorry

Being a first-time mum is tough for so many reasons – particularly because you really have no idea what you're doing.

A trace of sesame could kill my son

Helen Richardson son's had two anaphylactic reactions in a month. It's traumatic for everyone.

When you know before the test says yes

It wasn't a pregnancy test or missed period that told me I was pregnant with my second baby; it was too early for those things. A doner kebab told me I was going to be a mum again.

What not to do when your partner is in labour

Robbie Williams stole the show during his wife Ayda's labour, pretty much demonstrating everything on the "what not to do when your partner is in labour" list.

Best maternity swimwear and beach cover-ups

Thinking about a tropical babymoon but have nothing to wear? Here are some great swimwear and beach cover-up options for mums-to-be.

Dad breastfeeds his babies

Trevor Macdonald has now been pregnant twice, and is successfully breastfeeding his newest family member.

 

How many weeks til Christmas?

On your To-Do list

Get the "Santa" shopping done without the kids in tow.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.