13mth old girl Screams
Communicating, angry and clingy
, Jan 09 2013 06:19 PM
15 replies to this topic
Posted 09 January 2013 - 06:19 PM
So my DD13mths is my second child I have a DS who is 4yrs old.
My DD has always been demanding and seems to go through each development stage at full throttle. She certainly is a mummas girl and even through separation anxiety is there at times she mostly wants me to hold her, entertain her or give her my time. Anyhow I have dealt with that up and down over the last year the best I can.
This new phase has taken it to a new level of stress and frustration for me. She now screams high pitch non stop all day!!!! I know she is communicating with us but I am going CRAZY!!! I can't discipline her, can't reason with her, can't get her to stop by any means...she even just screams, looks at me when I say no, then screams again. I also know she is screaming at my 4yr old who is playing with her and she doesn't want to share her toys etc. I end up yelling at him all day just to leave her alone. This is the sad thing as it is not really his fault. He wants to play with her and yes a times is being a annoying big brother. But seriously she just screams for everything.... When she wants something she can't have, sharing toys, getting nappy changed, out the bath, waking up a 0530, getting in car, out the car, in the pram. The list goes on.
Did anyone else go through this? My sister had similar issues with her daughter and said by 15mthe got better. Her ears are also damaged from the screaming.
I am losing it. I am MAD, frustrated and over it!!!!! HELP!!!!!
Posted 09 January 2013 - 06:29 PM
My 15 month old DS is going through the same as your DD. I could have easily written the exact same post as yours. I will be looking at the replies and hopefully it's just an age thing that they eventually get over.
Posted 09 January 2013 - 06:45 PM
It's because of frustration because they can't just come out and say what they want or how they feel.
Yes same here (15 mo).
I've been trying the technique of offering small choices, like - nappy time, walk to your room or mummy carry you? Blue nappy or Santa nappy? This toy or that toy? Breakfast time, toast or porridge? And counting down (in a fun way). Out of the bath - five, four, three, two one yay out of the bath!
Seems to help.
Posted 09 January 2013 - 06:48 PM
My mum babysat DD for 3 hours and by the time I came home, she was saying please instead of screaming. No idea what mum did though, not sure I want to know!! Maybe I could rent Mum out though? Make some extra cash for the holidays?
Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:02 PM
I know she is trying to communicate via screaming because she can't talk but it is a form of torture.
Thank you for talking through options and suggestions. I start my day like this but end it with yelling and giving no options. Remembering I have a 4yr old at home who also wants ( deserves) my attention as well.
So I guess I am not looking for the answer as to why she screams. More how you cope, strategies, hope it subsides soon etc.
Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:06 PM
DD has a lovely high pitch scream. She still uses it at 3yrs (although less often).
Neither of my boys did that.
Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:14 PM
Baby sign language. Well worth it. You don't need to buy anything just use the online auslan dictionary and make some signs up.
Start with food and drink and other basic needs.
Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:19 PM
It won't happen overnight, as she gets more language it'll get easier. So, you can work on ways to get her to communicate, either by pointing, or learning to translate what words she uses. Eg, my youngest when she was 18 months, would scream for her cup. So, as an example, I'd calmly say, 'oh, do you want your CUP? Can you say cup?' She would then say, 'cuck', and that became her word. Then just practice that with each issue.
Lots of talking throughout the day, reading etc, all the usual stuff parents do to encourage vocabulary. Even when they're young, I'd say, 'can you say it nicely without screaming?' or in her nice voice, or whatever
This. My DD did this after 12 months and I started doing above. Pointed, repeated, made her work for object she wanted. Works a treat.
Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:20 PM
You are right RAWR. I do do these things to encourage her to communicate effectively and help her develop. But she is also a monkey and when I do explain eg. Can you say please, or off. She stops, stares then screams just as loud.
I know it ultimately comes down to me a my patience as she is being a toddler ( though very different to my son) and I know why she does it I just crack when it is all day long!!!!
Posted 09 January 2013 - 07:50 PM
I fully sympathise with you! My son went through this too. He is now nearly 18months and it has stopped thankfully. I think it was worst between 12m and 16m. He also seemed to scream all day long, and the checkout operators at our local supermarket would comment that they always knew when we were in
Even though he still isn't really talking the screaming has pretty much disappeared. Its only when he's tired or not feeling well that he does it. So although i don't have any advice, it should pass
edited: to take out inappropriate smiley face, stupid phone
Edited by KC1979, 09 January 2013 - 07:54 PM.
Posted 21 January 2013 - 10:38 PM
So good to read this. All mine does is angry crying - all day long. Worse when we are with other people. I know I will survive - child number 2 was similar- but it's just good to know I'm not alone!
Posted 24 January 2013 - 02:14 PM
Hi OP, my DS is 20mo now and is still screaming, I hope it doesn't last this long for you cause I am slowly going insane! Everyone says it will stop when he starts talking but that hasn't happened yet, he is going to get a speech assessment tomorrow. I second the supermarket thing, all the staff say 'oh DS is here again', funny for them not for me. Anyway I wish you good luck, if you stumble across a miracle could you please share it!!
Posted 25 January 2013 - 03:49 AM
My 12mo DD is known as "Shouty, the littlest dwarf" (youngest of 7 babies, hence the dwarf reference). She absolutely nuts if she is told no, shouts angrily at her top of her lungs when she wakes up and has a high pitched squeal that could break glass!
The squeal isn't too much of a hassle at the moment as we play a game with her whereby we say "shush" and put our fingers to our lips. She tries to imitate and just ends up blowing out on her finger repeatedly - it is mega cute! However, she most definitely will not accept anyone saying no to her. Sadly, I think getting through this will take time and development of communication skills on her behalf.
Posted 05 February 2013 - 12:57 PM
Yep I'm going through this with my 13 month old DS - he's challenging me at every turn at the moment, like the devil has taken him lol.
I've been reading Sheyne Rowley's book Dream Baby & she has some great info on communicating with babies at this age & managing the tantrums, it's taking time but I'm seeing some improvement - early days for us though. They don't understand no unfortunately & this is really hard! DS thinks putting his foot up on his tray is funny & laughs at me when I move it & say no. I've found that by talking to him & saying feet don't belong on the table, foot down for mummy is getting a much better response but he's still not happy about it - 1 day at a time. He YELLS at me when not happy, oh such fun :-)
Good luck I hope this phase passes, I tell people we are having the terrible 2's a year early lol
Posted 05 February 2013 - 01:22 PM
DS has been like this for the last month or so. Not really screaming, more a grunting angry yell. He is 1 in a couple of weeks.
I'm trying to teach him to indicate his needs in a different way. It's hard, he has only just started doing things like lifting his arms to be picked up. He doesn't point or reach or anything. Mostly by having a routine, I know when he is hungry or thirsty or whatever.
I've started to use the approach of getting down on his level on giving him a hug whenever he gets like that. We might both be frustrated but at least he knows I'm there for him. I then try to redirect him to an activity, or having a drink of water, or whatever.
It's tough, OP. I don't have any answers, I'm just experimenting myself, but you have my sympathy.
Posted 21 February 2013 - 08:42 PM
Exactly the same at my place (except my son is 3). I am absolutely at the point where I can't stand it any more. I mean, what would we do if our older child walked around with a whistle, blowing it in our ear all day and didn't understand "no" and you couldn't confiscate the whistle!!! Maddening!! Torturous!!! ... Aaarrrghhh!!!!!
Okay, now I feel better
..... a bit.
I've been presuming it's frustration with language (or lack thereof) and have definitely started stepping up the slow word repetition etc. It's so bizarre because my son was so quick with his language acquisition so it baffles me that she seems to prefer this mode of communication when everyone around her - even her 3 year old brother - is speaking confidently and clearly. She makes lots of vocal sounds, but they don't really resemble words. She points at things and says, "Gah" mostly, but her consonant sounds include "D" "B" and "M" and she's very chatty. It just doesn't make any sense to me that she prefers the screaming.... and yet, here I am......
What I want to know is: HOW LONG DOES IT LAST?
1 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users
to WIN 1 of 2 $500 Coles/Myer gift cards
Your schedule is not important to your two-year-old, and you cannot convince her otherwise. So what can you do?
A child whose remains were dumped in a suitcase in the South Australian bush is believed to have been a girl aged between two-and-a-half to four.
An Argentinian mum and politician has caused a stir on social media after being filmed breastfeeding her baby.
It was 1am on a cold winter's night when I woke suddenly to the screams of my 12-month-old son. Our lives were about to change forever.
Inflatable and portable children's pools may be required to be sold with compulsory fencing to prevent backyard drownings, with some experts even floating the idea of a ban.
At 11.07am on April 2 this year, Sarah Marriott welcomed baby Sebastian into the world.
These kids' beds definitely fit the brief of providing personality and personal space for little people who are moving up in the world.
Since becoming noticeably pregnant, my son has taken more of an interest in the sibling he'll soon have.
In this age of political correctness, it seems the one subject still subject to discrimination is that of the Only Child.
A neighbour heard a child screaming before a baby was found dead, believed to have been stabbed, in a house in Newcastle.
So far, 206 Samsung washing machines have caught fire and some have exploded. But many remain in people's homes.
We all know that having a baby can turn your life upside down - and it can also bring a raft of new anxieties and worries.
Couples using IVF may be able to choose the gender of their babies and women could be financially compensated for donating their eggs.
Not too young, and not too old. That's reportedly the best age to get married. Not everyone agrees.
After giving birth, the last thing you want to think about is contraception. But you can get pregnant before your period comes back.
Parents of toddlers everywhere know the feeling. After working up the courage to take your child out for lunch or dinner in public you are rewarded with a mid-meal meltdown.
Two children were killed when pieces from their Malm furniture line tipped over.
If you're looking to introduce an organic element into your baby's nursery but want to step away from natural timber, we have the perfect alternative.
I am in no way qualified to advise women on how to cope with hyperemesis, but I've learnt some lessons that might be worth sharing with other partners.
Best friends share everything - and for these two life-long friends, that includes family.
Samuel Forrest didn't want his wife as a trustee of their baby Leo's half million dollar trust for her own "protection", it has emerged.
Men who become fathers experience weight gain and an increase in body mass index, a measurement of body fat based on height and weight, according to a new, large-scale study
She said the photo of a boy with Down syndrome in a washing machine was taken just for fun, but no one else was laughing.
An opulent high tea at a luxury Melbourne hotel has left 44 people with salmonella poisoning - including a pregnant woman, who went into early labour.
Would you know what to do in a fire emergency? How safe is your home and family?
Prince George's second birthday has been marked by the release of an official picture showing the toddler smiling as he is held by his proud beaming father.
Is it safe to use fake tan, hair dye and nail varnish during pregnancy?
The truth is, I can no longer deny that my walking, babbling, somewhat-independent little miss is no longer a bona fide 'baby'.
I'm not usually one who believes in love at first sight but that's exactly what happened when I first saw the Cybex PRIAM.
Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.
to WIN 1 of 2 $500 Coles/Myer gift cards
I believe that you get out of families what you put into them, and I will give mine my all.
I have had two postnatal psychotic episodes. The first when my eldest child was six weeks old, and another after my second child was born.
French names are always in fashion, but a few have risen in popularity in recent years.
A British woman who gave birth in Spain has told of her ordeal after spending weeks trying to convince medics the baby girl was hers.
Some friends of ours say that it's dangerous to have a dog around a newborn and that we should start looking for a new home for him. Is it?
First Apple and Facebook announced they would pay $20,000 towards the cost of their female employees freezing their eggs, now IBM in the US has come up with an innovative new policy aimed at retaining female employees.
The Duke of Cambridge opened up about family life and his plans for the future in an interview to mark his first day as an air ambulance pilot.
A simple photo taken in front of an evening fire gave new mother Sarah Bowers the power to save her baby's life.
Of all the advice people told me before having a baby, no one warned me about the amount of decisions involved.
Parents of toddlers all know the moment when realise your child is being suspiciously quiet. It can only mean one thing - trouble!
If you have trouble recalling the ages of Jeremy Ryan's seven children on The Voice, you're not alone. So does he.
Getting glasses can be a formative moment in a person's life.
When a mum of six was caught shoplifting nappies, clothes and shoes for her kids, the last thing she expected was for a stranger to pay for her haul.
The risk of having uncontrolled depression is far greater than the small increased risk of birth defects that may be associated with specific antidepressants.
Police have raided properties and arrested a number of people over a brawl at a child's birthday party at a play centre in Sydney's west.
Looking for a creative way to share some big news? Look to the skies, like this family did.
Little Owen DiCandilo's name means "young warrior", and it's a description that perfectly fits the inspiring 18-month-old
The exhaustion that comes with caring for young children often means romance between parents becomes a thing of the past.
I've been fat for pretty much most of life, besides a few crazy moments of being less-fat, but for the most part I've existed on this earth with a little more meat on my bones than desirable.
Since the dawn of civilisation, generation after generation of new parents have had to rely on instinct, trial and error - and sometimes get it wrong.
Get your free ticket to The Essential Baby & Toddler Show and save $20 - register online now!