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TTC#1 after miscarriage #37
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Posted 09 January 2013 - 09:51 AM
I've always wanted to do that!
Nothing else to say....just bored at work today!
Posted 09 January 2013 - 11:15 AM
ugh work. why aren't I fabulously independently wealthy???
Posted 09 January 2013 - 11:23 AM
Hey Ally most people who have gotten gold's have graduated from the group :-)
How you feeling babe? I am so excited for you. I can't wait for Friday to come by and P/O quickly. You better collect oodles of baby dust for the rest of us.
Clarisse I am not going anywhere hun. I belong in this group with all of you but I do feel like a loser now. More than 1 year since TTC and no BFP. When I lost bub, and the way the drs were talking to me, I was convinced I was going to fall immediately after my loss. It's now been 18 mths since my last BFP. I can't help thinking, God was that a Fluke???
Anyhow, IVF here I come. I am going to countdown to my time to IVF. I have 2 more tries from now before we start IVF. Not long to go
Although AF is on her way (stupid cramps), I am still in such a happy and cheerful mood. Not sure how long it will last.
2P - Ditto. I am not in the mood to work at the moment. I would rather sit here and dream :-)
Posted 09 January 2013 - 11:44 AM
so we finally got a new thread!
Have been reading lots (and following) but given I have not much news didn't quite feel like posting!
Ally, I am so happy for you and have everything crossed that lines just get darker until Friday
K, Sweetheart you are not a loser at all. Massive for you
2P - followed your (well hubby's) diving dramas hope everything is improving and yes not working right now would be awesome.
AFM - on CD 4 and not much to say ... another cycle down. I have days where I want to jump straight to a FS and other days where I am happy to just keep trying. I do know is that its getting harder to stay positive and I do find myself contemplating that I might never have kids. Probably not very helpful.
Posted 09 January 2013 - 12:07 PM
Am also not in the mood to work. At all. Money tree o money tree, where art thou?
K, I'm glad you're not leaving us and you're not a loser at all!
Posted 09 January 2013 - 12:12 PM
Clarisse if you find that money tree you have to share!
Posted 09 January 2013 - 12:57 PM
If I find one, I'll give you all cuttings to plant for yourselves
Posted 09 January 2013 - 01:30 PM
I kill plants - don't know if i can be trusted with a money tree
Posted 09 January 2013 - 02:20 PM
Hello Ladies, I would really like to join this group if I can. I have been reading alot of your posts here and I really struggle to keep up with who is who as there are so many of you but I would love to try.
Firstly I have to say to all of you I am very very sorry for your losses at whatever stage of pregnancy you were in it does not matter, the pain is pain no matter how far along you were. I can only imagine for those who have lost further along in pregnancy than I did how terrible that loss would have been. It makes me very sad to think anyone had to go through it.
Just a little background on me I am 41 and DH 42 just married after just under a year of dating (was clear he was it for me) on 31st August 2012. I went off the pill the week we got married.
I started using OPK in oct 2012 and got pregnant on 29th Nov 2012 and Early MC on 9th Dec 2012. I was just over 5 weeks according to my GP after bloods taken on 30th Nov.
After talking to my GP we decided to not wait til first AF because of my age and just go for it. My Levels returned to less than 3 after 3 dys of MC starting.
I thought I had a positive OPK (not quite as dark as control line) on 21 Dec.
We started to BD on 14th,then 16th,18th, 20th, 21st, 22nd, 24th 26th just to make sure we covered it all lol. We also BD on 30th. Well I have been testing for a week and until last night all tests BFN. I got the faintest of faint lines last night and this morning (not sure if is false, You really have to look to see it but it comes up within a minute)
So now am waiting over next few dys to see if its really positive or not. I am due for AF today if my cycle is on track. I have had stomach cramps since the 29th Dec daily but my symptoms are not like last time at all.
congrats to those who are expecting this month I will be stalking your progress closely lol I am so excited to hear about what your pregnancies bring. Sticky babies to you all
Posted 09 January 2013 - 02:47 PM
Awww thanks girls. Elippo you are officially known as the "tree killer" now, imagine killing a money tree at that. Ooh Clarisse, I would love a cutting of that plant. Let me know as soon as you find it.
Ellipo, I hate the waiting to O part. CD4's are so boring and uneventful. Bring on CD11 - 17 I say :-) FX for you for this cycle babe and also for not needing a FS.
pixi welcome to our group. It's a wonderful group to be in and all the girls here are awesome. Our grads are even more awesome cos they drop in and check up on us and leave wonderful notes reminding us that they were here once too and it all worked out. Well if you have gotten a BFP again (and yay for you), then you will be our grad with the shortest stay. Wait till tomorrow am and do another test. I am told that no 2 pregs are the same and so the symptoms may not be the same. Be positive, happy and loads of prayers for you. I will be to see your POAS results tomorrow am. Hope the witch stays away.
Posted 09 January 2013 - 04:03 PM
Glamour- this cycle is taking forever!!4 dpo with only a week till testing and I am going Dotty! I started SS today which I know is not good but I can't avoid it. TMI warning but I have had heaps of white CM today only...do u think I could be ovulating late? Even though I swore I ovulated the other day (tested and everything). Plus I have that dull crampy feeling that I always get when I o...man I hope I'm not o now! Any ideas?As for Kim kardashian...the girl makes my blood boil pregnant or not....they won't let gay people get married but they let people like her! Argh! Haha...rants over sorry ladies.
Ally- thanks so much for those answers. It's such a tough one knowing whether or not to test early cause its so blooming exciting! I'm hoping I can be strong because I feel like the disappointment of a chemical would far outweigh a couple of days wait....so the 16th it is for me and no sooner! Can't wait for Friday for you, only two more sleeps!
K- 2 cycles is really not far and definitely something for you to look forward to. At least you know that you are doing everything in your power to make this happen! U are a true champion in my eyes and a loser is far from what I would describe u as xoxo
2p- mutual feeling on the work front. I'm always telling DH that I'm just one of those people who weren't meant to work! He always seems to think I'm joking?
Elippo- good to have u back cd 4 is a fresh start to a new and potentially brilliant cycle! FX for u :-)
Pixi- welcome, you're in a great place and by the sounds of it, not for very long which is great news! The girls here are fantastic xoxo
Posted 09 January 2013 - 06:12 PM
thank you ladies, I hope I will only be here a short while and I hope the same for you ladies too. I think we deserve to have a bub more than most because of our experiences. It makes me so angry when people who could not give a stuff have babies willy nilly. We all really want them and would make great mums so I hope our dreams are achieved
Posted 09 January 2013 - 09:13 PM
Wishfully - haha - My ENTIRE life is SS these days, i think it's unavoidable really. I'm 5/6 DPO today... i have a feeling i ovulated a day earlier than usual according to my temps & OPKs. But i'm sticking with 5 DPO in my brain to be on the safe side when it comes to testing! I had an afternoon nap today after work which i've never done before - usually only on the weekends very rarely. I have a creamy CM at the moment and feeling generally wet... but maybe that is because its been so hot? Well... i got some internet cheapies in the mail today. I've told myself that if i at least hold out till Monday that i can have some sort of treat hehe!
I do believe it's possible to have some fertile CM after you've ovulated.. from what i've read, it usually ends in a BFP! So fingers crossed for you. Maybe get some BDing in just to be on the safe side. xx
K - Has the witch arrived?
Ally - Getting my hopes up for a BFP on Friday for you!
Posted 09 January 2013 - 10:10 PM
hi Glamour no she hasn't. She is 2 days away i believe so i am expecting her on Sat, the biatch.
Love reading your and Wishfully's posts. I spent a good 10 mths looking for EPS and driving myself crazy and constantly POAS only to be disheartened each month so i stopped but I think you girls will have much better luck than me.
Here's a question, esp for those of you who've had multiple losses, were your early preg symptoms the same for each preg? When I got my BFP last time, i tested 5 days early and got a BFP and the only reason i knew something was different was because i was peeing for the planet and it just felt different and it was happening every 1 hour and like 5 times a night. I just knew it. If only I could have that happen again.
Posted 09 January 2013 - 11:17 PM
I'm in shock.... Just got a !! I've only had one period since my last miscarriage but I usually have a 28 day cycle so would have been due for AF yesterday. I didn't test until tonight though using digital and got positives on both tests.
I'm anxious but excited.
K - this is the third time and I would say I have felt different each time. The first time I only tested as I realised I was well past my period....before my tracking days. The second time I tested the day before as I felt a bit queasy, and today only thought it was a slim chance as I have been ravenously hungry and have terrible skin at the moment.
Girls, I am so not ready to leave this group so hopefully I can still hang here...I am too anxious to join a DIG until I gets lot closer to 12 weeks.
And I am now a serious believer in relaxation helping with conception, evidently this one was also conceived on holidays, same as the last two times. forgetting work and life for a bit seems to do wonders....
Ally, I'll be ...
Posted 10 January 2013 - 07:22 AM
KLR - how very exciting - fingers, toes and everything crossed for you!
K - We drive ourselves crazy with looking for EPS don't you. I have to keep remembering that for my first (and only) BFP I actually had no real symptoms until after I saw that faint line which was one day after AF was due (and after I had weird spotting). I did have an increase in creamy CM but I have now had that with both post MC cycles so am not using that as a sign. But thanks for the good wishes - I am thinking BD'ing from as soon as AF has left.
Glamour - good luck holding out, I find that with internet cheapies in the house I have no self control (probably because they are so cheap and I have so many)
Pixi - welcome!
Wishfully - do you mean white CM as in colour or egg white consistancy? If it is creamy in colour its likely post ovulation (but an increase in CM can be a EPS).
AFM - CD 5, was going to temp vaginally this cycle but really am not sure I can be bothered temping at all. Might just try with crazy amount of BDing from as soon as AF has left ...
Posted 10 January 2013 - 08:06 AM
KLR - how exciting!!!! Congratulations!!! I think there is a LOT to be said for being stress free whilst TTC.
Wishfully - I have a feeling this month is going to be ANOTHER chemical, so I sometimes wish I had your strength. Maybe next month I should get DH to hide the tests.
Glamour - sounding positive for you, too!
Pixi - FX you'll be outta here in the next day or so!
K - it's an interesting question. I was SO relaxed when I started TTC and not symptom spotting at all. I was surprised to get my BFP as I hadn't noticed any symptoms, but then, I don't think I was particularly in tune with my body. With both chemicals, I have felt 'pregnant', but I am not sure if it's placebo. Last month, I only fel a bit naseous for a day or two. This month, I have felt off all week.
Elippo - Your DH will probably like that crazy BD theory! I cannot bring myself to temp vaginally. Just can't. It's too much first thing in the morning.
Clarisse - I might need some of those cuttings, particularly if my job interview goes well on Monday (more on that below).
AFM, still a faint line, but it's getting fainter (I think....). Certainly not getting darker. I am still feeling 'off', but am not holding out too much hope. DH bought a ridiculoulsy expensive bottle of bugundy in case we needed to drown our sorrows this month, so at least I have that to look forward to. I do expect the tests to turn negative and AF to show up in the next few days. I am trying not to be TOO negative, girls. On the flip side, my BFP did not actually show up until 17DPO (and I am 14DPO today), so there is some slim hope.
On the subject of stress reduction, I have a job interview Monday - wish me luck!! I work for the devil. I know there are a few lawyers in this group, so I am sure you can imagine the type - baby boomer, white, male, egotistical, megalomaniac. I call him the white collar psychopath. Problem is, the cunning man overpays me (like 'danger' money that soldiers get!). Anyway, I am interviewing for a public service job Monday. It's a hefty pay cut, but it will be worth it for some happiness.
Posted 10 January 2013 - 08:17 AM
2P - I agree completely! We should all get lots of money lol
K - sorry AF is on her way, really hope it's an easy month for you FX
I can't answer your question for multiple m/c's, but I can say that I never really had intense EPS with my pg until after the 2WW time, and have had pretty similar "symptoms" for other non pg cycles, I also didn't have that "I just know I'm pg" feeling until after my period was one day late.
pixi - welcome, and I hope your BFP turns out really well
Wishfully - As per Elippo, if the CM is white in colour then that's "normal" "everyday" CM (lol) and can be an EPS, if it's like egg white (mainly clear and stretchy) then that's generally the fertile CM, but also like Elippo said it can come after O as well as before.
I would hazard a guess that you've already O'd, both the CM and O cramps can happen after O has actually happened and be completely normal, or they can both be EPS Unfortunately our cycles do not have to always follow the same pattern and can even be different for just one cycle out of all of them and it mean nothing other than our hormones were slightly different for no particular reason.
(I've had O type cramps after O before). Fingers crossed for you and I hope it's EPS
Glamour - FX for you, hope your 2WW flies by
KLR - That's great news, well done! Everything is crossed that all goes well
Elippo - sorry that you are very up and down lately and I hope that some positively comes your way. Last cycle I was really positive and looking forward to contacting my OBGYN if this current cycle didnt happen, but not that I'm in this cycle I'm quite anxious and definitely not positive like last cycle
Ally - fingers very very crossed for you, I do so hope it's not another chemical for you. And much good luck coming your way for the job interview (your current boss sounds like all sorts of bad)
AFM - My period is due tomorrow and one minute I feel like this might be it, and the next minute I feel horribly naive for thinking like that.
I feel more and more distant from conceiving, like it's unachievable, or some distant concept that isn't actually a reality, sometimes my pg, mmc, D&C all feels like it didn't actually happen, like it was just a dream or something. Like, I couldn't possibly have been pg, because I'm not getting pg again / now.
It really does just feel so unachievable.
My plan is to contact my OBGYN if this cycle doesn't happen, and although last cycle (in early Dec) I was really positive about this being the next step, now I'm feeling more like, "what's the point" - *argh* it's just so annoying feeling like this!!
Posted 10 January 2013 - 08:42 AM
N @ K I'm FX that your period doesn't show up tomorrow xx
Ally I know exactly the type of man you mean. My boss is like that but not a megalomaniac (most of the time). He overpays me too ... but at least I'm home by 6pm almost every day! Good luck with your interview on Monday!
KLR79 oooh congratulations! Please stick around here for as long as you need to
Elippo I always consider temping but can never be bothered haha
Glamour wait until Monday! You should decide now what you'll treat yourself too if you do hold out so that you can think of that when you feel like testing.
K if I ever find a money tree, I'll be sure to share it
AFM I had more EWCM yesterday and my OPK was a lot darker, almost positive so hopefully it will be positive today (CD25) which means I'm on track for a 38 day cycle which is what my cycle tracking app predicted. I wish I knew that I was going to O so late in the cycle, wouldn't have started BDing so early hahaha
Posted 10 January 2013 - 08:51 AM
KLR you beauty I am sooooo pleased for you. Congratulations my darling. When you rejoined our group, I felt so bad for you so I am doubly pleased for you. Please be positive and just hang around here for as long as you need to .
N @ K I feel more and more distant from conceiving, like it's unachievable, or some distant concept that isn't actually a reality, sometimes my pg, mmc, D&C all feels like it didn't actually happen, like it was just a dream or something. Like, I couldn't possibly have been pg, because I'm not getting pg again / now. It really does just feel so unachievable. It feels like you have read my soul and put it down on paper. I feel exactly this and deep down in my soul (not mind) I constantly feel this way, which is why I put that "loser" comment about myself. I feel like a loser because I feel the exact same way. But I must say, after crying over my lost son for 1 year, I feel much stronger this year and so there is an element of positivity in me too. I am no longer punishing myself for losing him. Please don't snap at me for saying this hun but you are 28 and still very young, so just cut out the stress as much as possible and AF hasn't arrived yet, so who knows you could be preg as we speak. Ooh I really hope that is the case. FX it happens for you very very soon.
Ally please no more negativity. I had the same thing happen and carried till almost 19 weeks. Your HCG levels could get diluted if you are drinking a lot, the tests might not be a good one. Go to the dr on Sunday/Monday and get a BT. Please don't think negative. In fact, do the opposite and think that this is your sticky. I now totally believe in the concept of self fulfilling prophecy and the act of positive thinking. I am a lawyer too and I understand what you are saying about the ridiculous pay, thankfully I am in a niche area so I only have to deal with a**holes on some of my matters. Good luck with the interview. Focus on that and I am sure all will be well on your "bub" front. If you do get the job, will you still take it? You will need to go on mat leave in approx 8 mths time love xo.
Wishfully I get cramps for a week (horrid cramps) after I have O'd and the creamy/white (not clear) CM is usually an indication that your body is producing progesterone. The prog is produced by the follicle from which the egg came and it helps sustain a pregnancy. So hopefully you caught the egg when you O'd.
Ellipo good luck with this cycle babe. I have stopped symptom watching because I did it for most of last year and then would spend days crying when AF would show up. I have learnt some very hard lessons. I remember the day my water broke, I had written a comment on my facebook page saying "patience is not a virtue that I have". Because I was dying to see my hubby who had gone to China and more importantly I was dying to find out if i was having a girl or a boy at my 20 week scan. My water broke at 17.5 weeks. What a SLAP life gave me!! I then spent all of last year dying to get to "testing" time and again, was taught a harsh lesson, so this year I am trying to let things go and to go with the flow. Lets see how long it lasts. Take care of yourself, all will be well. This is our year :-)
Glamour what symptoms have you spotted today??
2p how's things babe?
Nothing much to report. Went and saw our house yesterday. It's looking nice except I am disappointed with my shower (in the ensuite) and I didn't like DH's attitude when I got upset about it, so I had a bit of a cry and was just grumpy. Woke up today feeling a bit better. It's still going to be a brand new house I guess (there I go counting the positives, I'd have never thought this of myself, I am miss negativity personified). No more cramps but feeling hot flushes. AF is such a witch. If I met her in person i would kill her . Going bed shopping tonight. Most frustrating task ever. Stalking for news from pixi.
Edited by kmaharaj, 10 January 2013 - 08:53 AM.
Posted 10 January 2013 - 09:25 AM
K - your words brightened me up so much. I have been REALLY thirsty, too, so drinking a lot. Thank you so much, darling.
I will still take the job if it is a BFP. I know it's a bit crazy. I will get 3 months at full and 3 months at half pay mat leave here, which is great, but sometimes money cannot be the primary driver. We almost own our apartment (which is large, 2 bedrooms and in a great location, so will suit us fine when we get an addition), have a few hundred thousand in our offset account and DH has a good job. If we are blessed with a bub, we can manage on one salary for a while. People with a lot less manage and so will we. If I get the job AND a BFP, I will negotiate an arrangement with them before I accept that suits us both. I think they will appreciate my honesty, particularly if I tell them the amazing mat leave I am foregoing to take the position.
This is your year, K. Your whole attitude has shifted so much - it has to be a good thing.
I am so jealous of your new house!!
N @ K I'll be stalking for you. Everything is crossed. K is right - you are young and it could be happening for you right now.
Clarisse - I DREAM of being home by 6pm! We are not permitted to leave until 6pm at the earliest. If anyone has seen Mad Men, my boss is exactly like Don Draper. I gave him Mad Men for Christmas, but I'm not sure if he'll get the hint....
He lies a LOT and plays a fun game of looking at your calendar, seeing personal appointments and then urgently having to speak with you at EXACTLY the same time. I have missed that many yoga classes, friends birthday dinners and other occassions from this insane behaviour.
Where is that money tree girls??!!!! (although my brother in law gave me a cactus for Christmas as I usually kill all plants, so don't trust ME with it!).
Posted 10 January 2013 - 09:37 AM
TMI but I just went to the loo and when I wiped, I got pink so AF is definitely going to arrive very soon. Funnily enough I didn't get too upset, a small amount of disappointment and then "move one". Ally I am so envious that you almost own your aptment. Frankly, in this country if you own your home (whatever that home is), the rest is much easier. We were almost the same as you except that we sold our house cos I lost the baby there and I couldn't bear to live in it, it was getting TOO much for me. So we then knocked down our rental property and are building this and we will end up with a bigger mortgage now. I suspect, we will be "dying" in this new house as this is it for us. As soon as it's done and furnished, all my pay will be going into the mortgage so that hopefully in 3-4 years we too will have almost paid it off. Then I don't care whether I lose my job or whatever, i will happily work the floor in DJ's and spray perfume or line the shelves at coles. To me no job is too big or too small. If I can stay at home and be with my kid and work at night at coles then so be it. My DH has a good job but engineers don't get paid the same as lawyers so for the moment me working in this stressful but highly paid job helps us out a lot and gets us closer to our goal.
Ally, we are so similar I turned down a job at EY which was going to pay a LOT more than my pay here and I am already highly paid, I told them up front that I wanted a baby and I wouldn't be able to give them the comittment they wanted from me because I might start work and then announce i was preg. Better to be honest than to burn my bridges.
BTW are you in Sydney????
Been meaning to tell you all that I bought 2 weeks extra leave this year and I am going to use every second of that leave to help me. Who knows I might need it when I go on IVF
Posted 10 January 2013 - 09:38 AM
Good Morning Ladies, Omg I am struggling to keep up with you all but I will do my best lol. I am going to have to scroll through the posts and type this as I do hahaha.
Thank you all for your welcome and happy BFP thoughts.
Glamour and Wishfully I have been ESS for weeks now as I have not had AF since my MC in Dec and I have much confusion around ovulation as it wasn't clear. Drives you nuts huh? lol
clarisse83 Here is hoping for a positive O test today
KLR congratulations I am sending sticky bubba thoughts your way
kmaharaj Its so exciting building a new house but such a worry at the same time as you want them to get everything perfect. Its new and it should be perfect right? I understand your anger though as there were a couple of things I put my foot down on and made them fix no matter what. I built mine on my own thought, it was before I met my DH. I hope it comes together nicely and shopping for furniture is a pain but exciting at the same time. I wish AF would go away forever but we need that to be able to ovulate don't we? or do we?lol
AllyK81 You are sounding like your where I am at. I have taken probably 6 tests all FRER since Tues and all have a faint line, before then they were all BFN.
I have found mine seem to be slightly darker if I take later in the day but that could be my imagination. They are not really getting much darker if at all in the last day. I really hope your BFP sticks and mine too and we can be buddies through this.
Good luck with the job
N@K I am sorry your feeling like its not going to happen but try to be positive and your day will come as you deserve it to happen because you want it so much. One of my friends asks the angels for things. She asked the angels for me to get a BFP last week for today and I am hoping the very faint lines are it.
AFM - Well you may as well be talking to Ally when talking to me as I feel I am in the same boat. Please don't take that the wrong way Ally.
Lines look like they are not getting darker, then I think they are more faint! Tests get left laying around and dry out and get darker so I compare new ones to those sheesh
I have become totally addicted to POAS. I have taken like 6 tests in less than 2 days because I am feeling like Ally and the line is not getting much darker and sometimes fainter.
I think the reason its not getting darker is because I am testing too much. How can I expect it to get darker after 3 hrs? lol I found my test yesterday afternoon was the darkest but still faint. My FMU is not showing darker and think it could be because I get up minimum of 3 times at night to pee.
Its doing my head in hahaha I have had stomach cramps since 29th on and off but usually every day. I feel like AF is coming but I dont at the same time as I never get cramps before but the pains are like mild AF pains. Jeez this business of trying to get pregnant messes with your head
Off to my naturopath today she specialises in fertility and this is my second visit my last was one day before my last BFP. I spent so much money only to find out was pregnant already hahaha. Its crazy my appointment is today and I may even be pregnant again.
I will keep you updated on my testing progress. Its my grandmothers birthday tomorrow she passed just before my wedding and she was my matron of honor, it would be so nice to get a true BFP then. She would love that
If i missed anyone please forgive me I have taken 20mins to get this far lol there are so many of you and I am finding it hard to find out whats going on with you all
I wish beautiful bubs for you all and I really mean that. What a precious thing it would be for all of us who want it so much. xxx
Edited by pixi1971, 10 January 2013 - 09:41 AM.
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Yes, the bouncing baby girl was born by caesarean section. And mum says no more kids.
I'm the first to admit that when I used to see tiny babies with dummies in their mouths, I thought "Hmm, lazy parenting." And now I apologise.
Imagine meeting your double at a school sports event, or regularly being mistaken for someone you haven't met. Separated twins Margaret and Joy tell their story.
As Sydney grieves the loss of Sydney siege victims Katrina Dawson and Tori Johnson, reports have suggested that both died as heroes.
How many weeks til Christmas?
Get the "Santa" shopping done without the kids in tow.