Jump to content

Moving 2.5yr old back in to his bed


  • Please log in to reply
13 replies to this topic

#1 BeYOUtiful

Posted 07 January 2013 - 01:03 PM

Our son is 2.5 at the end of this month.  He has been co sleeping with me since he was getting molars and eye teeth.  The poor thing gets 4 teeth at once and was waking hourly.  It helped my sanity at the time as well as giving him the much needed sleep he needed.

I have just weaned him  last month from BF and think now is the time to get him back in to his bed.

We are going to convert his cot in to a toddler bed.

Prior to co sleeping he was still waking 1-2 times a night when in his cot.  Once in with me, it gradually eased out and he started sleeping through the night, when I commenced day weaning or perhaps just prior.

I am concerned moving him in to his room will bring with it wake ups again, but I do think he needs to be back in his bed/room.  He will be going to pre school next year so would like it done well before then, as well as TT.

Since weaning he now goes to sleep by placing one hand on my chest area and sucking the other thumb.  He does this for day sleeps as well - I lay with him until he goes to sleep.  Both day and night he is usually asleep within 5 minutes.

I am not sure what weight his cot holds, but dare say it wouldn't be a 60kg woman plus a 11+kg toddler biggrin.gif  
Just wondering what has worked for others in similiar situations?
Lay on the floor in his room until he drifts off?  Sit on a chair nearby so he can still have the contact that seems to help soothe him to sleep?  Or is it time to cease that too?
It's all trial and error, just thought there may be something I haven't thought of which may work.  Cheers

TIA original.gif

#2 BeYOUtiful

Posted 09 January 2013 - 09:20 AM

Going by no replies, I am screwed then? lol

#3 RachealJane

Posted 09 January 2013 - 09:30 AM

Im in the same situation.

My 2.5 yo just weaned but still goes to sleep with me lying with her (and because im pregnant im falling asleep with her most nights too, so exhausted).

I've got a queen size mattress on her floor and thats where we sleep. But i'd ideally like her to go to sleep in her single bed which is what she was doing prior to us having house guests over Christmas.

I think it is just trial and error with it all. Maybe try explaining that "from tonight (or whenever) mummy wont lay down with you but will sit next to you" and see how you go.



#4 Silly Old Elf

Posted 09 January 2013 - 09:47 AM

What cot do you have? We have a Boori and I weigh more than 60kg ph34r.gif . We converted to a bed at around 19 mo and I can lay with her no probs. We had a LOT of sleep issues (also co-slept just to get some sleep) but now much better. We do story time then cuddles and sleep. She knows she is not allowed to leave her room, and we keep her door open. She knows that I will check on her after about 2 mins (always with a kiss llove.gif ), then 5 mins (with a kiss), then 10, and then if still not asleep another 20 mins or so. Only took a couple of days for this to work, and she rarely wakes before 5am (and then in with us for an hour or so). This also works for day time naps and although she doesn't always have a sleep she will stay in her bed reading quietly for up to an hour and a half.

#5 BeYOUtiful

Posted 09 January 2013 - 10:01 AM

Thanks for replies  original.gif
RachealJane I think beside the bed is the way to go as you suggested and leave once he is drifting off.

Nematode, It is a Boori Sleigh (the ones with the closed in ends, not the model with the rails on the ends).  I couldn't locate the book for it so not sure what weight it holds.
I also like your idea of letting him know I will check in on him.

I will give it a go from Friday night.

Edited by ~Jane05~, 09 January 2013 - 10:03 AM.


#6 Lokum

Posted 09 January 2013 - 10:06 AM

My 2.5 year old was sleeping in his cot at the start of the night, but would come to our bed overnight. We didn't have much luck resettling him in the cot (and TBH, didn't try too hard.) Then he stayed with my sister for 5 nights when our newie was born, didn't go into her bed, and when he came home, stopped coming to our bed (has been in 2-3 times in 7 weeks.) Miracle cure, but a bit radical, perhaps to send him away for 5 nights.

Temperature was a key factor in what time he came to us - so to be successful, you'll have to figure out how to keep him warm all night and in the early morning. This is tricky when it's warm or hot at bedtime, but cool in the early am.

When we converted his cot to toddler bed, we made a big deal of his new quilt, pillow and big-boy-bed. He got a special car shaped pillow etc etc. We read a book showing a baby in a cot and a big boy in a bed. He was enthusiastic about it.

In recent months, trying to fix a temporary sleep problem arising from jet lag, I stayed and held his hand with my head on his pillow (my bum on the floor), and gradually withdrew to just hand, then sitting on a chair, then outside the door. Key in all of this was NO eye contact. So I sat on the chair with my back to him, and told him I'd stay with him, but no talking because I was reading my book.

We also left his door open, and a dim light on.  We found if he woke in darkness, he'd scream and not re-settle, but if he woke in light with the door open, he'd often resettle himself.

Lots of luck!

ETA, we have a Boori country classic, and after my c/s I did lie on the bed with him for stories, cos it was too hard getting on and off the floor, and our combined weight was around 77kg!! Wouldn't do it for long periods, but appears to hold us for a couple of stories no probs!

Edited by Lokum, 09 January 2013 - 10:09 AM.


#7 Holidayromp

Posted 09 January 2013 - 10:09 AM

DS is just a little bit younger than your son.  He only started sleeping through in early July of this year (only one night) then Christmas Eve and then the previous two nights.  He is started to get it.  What I did was always put him to bed in his cot and then when he woke up during the night I would take him to bed with me.  Gradually he spent longer and longer in his cot and now for the first time every has slept through TWO NIGHTS IN A ROW eexcite.gif .  He may regress but at this stage it is awesome.  I feel rested.  

Like with all of my kids I go with their needs, not force any routines, I just let them find their way.  I found it to be gentle and allowed for things to fall into place.  DS did take a lot longer than the two DDs who slept through from 6 weeks but we are getting there.

Maybe this is something you can do.  I am still bfing - it is still demand fed but he is become less demanding the older he gets - he now only wants it when he is ready to sleep but can fall asleep without it.  Again when he is ready to wean so will I.  Just softly softly.  He is a stubborn little bugger so I found that if I allowed him to lead the way with lots of praise he does well.

#8 Diana_Barry

Posted 09 January 2013 - 10:13 AM

Just wanted to say that we have a cheap Ikea cot, and I also weigh a little (ha ha ha) more than 60kgs, but it holds me and (14kg) DS fine. It sounds to me like a cuddle to sleep in his own bed might be your best option for transition, then gradually transition to him settling himself once he's used to his own room again.

My DS mostly co-slept to 12 months (he did sleep a bit in his cot in our room, but usually came in with us if he stirred). Then we moved him to his own room, but cuddled to sleep. Then we transitioned to kiss goodnight & shut the door. He's almost 2, and 90% of the time he happily goes to sleep on his own.

#9 Diana_Barry

Posted 09 January 2013 - 10:20 AM

QUOTE (Lokum @ 09/01/2013, 11:06 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
We also left his door open, and a dim light on.  We found if he woke in darkness, he'd scream and not re-settle, but if he woke in light with the door open, he'd often resettle himself.


We found the opposite of this with our DS. If we leave the door open or lights on he just wants to get up and play. Just goes to show they're all different!

#10 BeYOUtiful

Posted 09 January 2013 - 10:38 AM

Holidayromp, well done on the sleep throughs, feels good hey.

QUOTE
It sounds to me like a cuddle to sleep in his own bed might be your best option for transition, then gradually transition to him settling himself once he's used to his own room again

Sounds like a good plan too, thanks.  I think you may be right.

I am a couple of kg's over 60 too, just not sure how many so 60 sounded good, lol.

Sorry Lokum I must have been typing when you replied, thank you for the tips original.gif  The temp is tricky to work around, he usually seems ok in with me overnight.  I wake cool after having fan on, no sheets/blankets, but he seems ok.  Maybe a different story when on his own again.  

Not sure how my sister would go 5 nights with him lol.

Edited by ~Jane05~, 09 January 2013 - 11:35 AM.


#11 beabea

Posted 12 January 2013 - 03:14 AM

QUOTE
Just wondering what has worked for others in similiar situations?
Lay on the floor in his room until he drifts off? Sit on a chair nearby so he can still have the contact that seems to help soothe him to sleep? Or is it time to cease that too?

My philosophy is to do the least necessary. With DS that meant lying down next to him til he drifted off. He loves his bed time cuddle but doesn't need it any more. DD still gets hers. He slept on the (double) sofabed until he learned how to settle himself better, and DD is following the same.

I say just see what you can get away with - but try and think about how you might lie down with him if necessary (sturdy single, sofabed, mattresses on floor, or...?).

#12 beabea

Posted 12 January 2013 - 03:15 AM

double post

Edited by beabea, 12 January 2013 - 03:16 AM.


#13 MummaBirdy

Posted 12 January 2013 - 06:02 AM

Don't underestimate the power of talking about it with your toddler so he knows what to expect from his bedtime.
My DD (2 today!) was pretty unsettled and in our bed lots after travelling at Christmas, but I sat her down 4 or 5 times in a day and gently explained that she had her bed to sleep in and that mummy and daddy's bed was just for mummy and daddy. She has older cousins she adores so we talked about how they sleep in their own beds (not necessarily true!) To my shock it actually worked, and now she hasn't slept in ours since. She also talks a lot about sleeping in her own bed because she's a big girl.
Toddlers are very smart but I think they like to know what to expect. That's why I'm a fan of routines.

#14 BeYOUtiful

Posted 12 January 2013 - 11:16 PM

Thank you for all the replies.
Today we got him involved in putting fresh sheets on the bed. Had him get up and down and told him what a great bed it was etc etc.
Spoke with him several times about how he was going in his new bed tonight.

He went in fine, I read him books and then he wanted more and more.  I refused and said time to sleep now please lay down for Mummy.  That lasted all of 5 seconds! He was up, down, jumping, asking me was I ok, telling me he was a boy and daddy is a girl, asking me for kiss/cuddle. Then up, down,jumping etc etc.  With me laying him down repeatedly or asking him to.

ARGHH!! I seriously now understood the phrase go the **** to sleep wink.gif

When 10.30 hit I knew I had to change tact, so laid on the bed with him until he went to sleep within 10-15mins.

Looking forward to tomorrow night tongue.gif

I might try the same though and sit by the bed first so he sees that as his new routine? As well as wear him out completely during day.  He had a later sleep today which wouldn't have helped.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Get your FREE Baby & Toddler Show ticket!

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

Win Love Child Season 1 & 2 on DVD

To celebrate the release of Love Child Season 2 on DVD from July 9, Essential Baby and Universal Sony Pictures Home Entertainment are giving away Love Child Season 1 & 2 on DVD to 13 lucky winners.

10 things I wish my pre-baby self knew

I look back at my pre-baby self and laugh at how ridiculously easy I actually had it. I remember complaining about how tired I was and how little time I had.

Creative ways to store your child's art

Ideas for storing your child's artworks have moved on from sticking them to the fridge door before guiltily dumping them in the bin.

Child abuse ignored because 'it's not your children': Waleed Aly

Waleed Aly takes apart the immigration law that's designed to "protect politicians"

How a newborn niece changed star Australian basketballer's life

In August 2013 star basketball Abby Bishop was 24-years-old and in the prime of her sporting career.

Guilt is my new shadow

No one warned me that when I gave birth there would be an additional side order of guilt.

12 brilliant Ikea hacks for kids’ rooms

Check out these creative upcycling ideas that transform regular Ikea items into something special for your little ones.

Child's nightmare about 'man with a light' turned out to be real

For three days, a three-year-old boy had been saying there was "a man with a light" outside his window at night.

Toilet truths after giving birth

The thought of going to the toilet after giving birth is often feared, but there are ways to make it less painful.

Woman asks strangers for $1 million to stop her having an abortion

An anonymous woman is taking an extreme moral and ethical stand by seeking $1 million in donations to prevent her going ahead with a planned abortion.

How a woman's dying wish made another woman a mum

"I kind of think about, 'What did I do beforehand? What kept me so busy back then?' Because now I'm really busy."

The parenting do-over: what six parents did differently second time around

In playgrounds across Australia, you can hear parents lamenting, "When we have our next baby I swear I won't be doing THAT again".

A solo birth, a wasp swarm and a forest fire: mum and baby's amazing story of survival

Desperate, out of petrol and low on food, a new mother lit a fire in the hope of attracting attention.

Boy found on swing died of hypothermia and dehydration, autopsy finds

The story was chilling and heartbreaking: a three-year-old boy was found dead in a Southern Maryland park, his mother pushing him on the swing.

Child's play and laughter help battle fatigue

Feeling fatigued? Uh-huh, thought as much. Join the queue.

Dad shares entertaining 'how to hold a baby' clip

For many new dads, their own child is the first baby they have ever held. So one dad has posted an instructive YouTube video titled "How to Hold a Baby".

The Australian baby with 100,000 Facebook fans

She may be only eight months old, but Egypt has already amassed more than 100,000 fans and received a letter from royalty - Hollywood royalty that is.

Tongue tie: what you need to know

Tongue and lip tie can lead to many problems for babies - and their parents. Here are the signs of tongue tie and how it's treated.

My daughter is small but that doesn't matter

My daughter may be small, but it's my job as her parent to refocus back where it belongs - on who she is as a person

Wet wipes linked to rise in allergic reactions

The government has issued a health warning after a rise in allergic skin reactions has been linked to a preservative found in some wet wipes.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

27 funny ultrasound pictures

Ultrasounds give you a look at your growing baby ... and sometimes what appears to their womb-buddy, or your bub in an amusing position.

What all parents should know about safe babywearing

A picture of Ryan Reynolds always gets the girls talking, and a recently shared photo has done exactly that - but this time, it's for all the wrong reasons.

Baby's head shape reveals potentially fatal condition

Thinking her baby just had an unusually shaped head, a mother was shocked to discover it was instead linked to a dangerous condition.

Why IVF success rates may not be what you think

Transparency, accountability and responsibilityare essential measures to protect IVF vulnerable patients.

Mother-in-law 'from hell' inspires survival guide

The happily ever after Nicola Milan had imagined wasn't to be – and she blames her mother-in-law.

Owning a pair of nail scissors does not make me a hairdresser

It's been a whole year since sleeping in until 10am. A whole year since having a peaceful shower.

The 83 children who were tragically let down in the last decade

Over a 10-year period, 83 children died from domestic violence abuse in NSW, with three quarters of the victims aged five years or under, the NSW Ombudsman has revealed.

Is it reasonable to expect your partner to give up drinking in pregnancy?

From the moment that I fell pregnant with my son, I realised just how much my life had already started to change.

Stroke victim joins class action against makers of popular contraceptive pill

"I was terrified I would always be this way. The pill needs to come with a much higher warning."

Sexy time

Why you should get excited about scheduling sex

Unfortunately, the belief that sex should always be spontaneous is a myth. It just isn't.

When newborn photoshoots get messy

When it comes to newborn photoshoots, it is all about the timing.

Expert Q&A: Gross motor skill development in toddlers and preschoolers

Dr Katie Heathershaw answers questions about jumping, toe walking, riding a bike and being pigeon toed.

'Samuel is our firstborn, and he will never be forgotten'

Having lost their firstborn at one day old, the Carrolls were overjoyed to welcome their daughter Isobel into the world a year later.

Dad takes miraculous catch while feeding baby

One American father has taken multitasking to a new level at a Cubs-Dodgers baseball game at Wrigley Field.

Name your baby Quinoa, win a $10K gift card

Choosing a name for your little bundle of joy is always a major decision. It can be something traditional, trendy, creative … or inspired by the menu of your favourite chain restaurant.

On the 10th anniversary of my son's death

This day marks a significant day. Today marks 10 years since I lost my son Kai.

'Help - my toddler hits me!'

My toddler has started hitting when he gets frustrated, is feeling ignored, or just thinks it might be fun.

The top 6 misleading parenting terms

From 'morning sickness' to 'the terrible twos', there are many parenting terms that are misleading.

When 'good' nannies go bad

While most nannies take pride in their work, there can be some who have a hidden side.

Woman hospitalised for skinny jeans injury

Beware: skinny jeans might be bad for your health.

Gauze seeding: the bacteria-breeding birth trend

A number of women having caesarean deliveries are now taking steps to give their baby a better 'microbiome' start in life.

Jimmy Fallon writes new children's book for dads

Jimmy Fallon, host of NBC's The Tonight Show, recently wrote a children's book about every father's secret wish for their baby's first word to be "dada" - not "mama".

28 names for babies born in winter

Looking for some baby name inspiration for a bub born during the colder months? Here are 28 options from around the world to consider.

 

FREE TICKET

Get your FREE ticket to the Baby & Toddler Show

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.