Jump to content

Witty responses to post baby weight comments
What are some of the best you have used


  • Please log in to reply
13 replies to this topic

#1 Honeybake

Posted 06 January 2013 - 07:21 AM

My GF had her 1st baby 11 weeks ago & she is constantly subjected to comments about "When is the baby due?"...."Haven't you had that baby yet?"... ohmy.gif

She looks amazing, in fact she looks 100% better than I do & I had my last baby 2 &1/2 years ago!!!

Obviously being a 1st time Mum, hormonal & sleep deprived, she is understandably a bit rocked by these comments post baby.

So ladies, what are some of the best, wittiest responses you have heard and/or used that stops those commenting in their tracks?

TIA

#2 BadCat

Posted 06 January 2013 - 07:37 AM

"I'm testing a new parenting theory called ultra attachment where you never let the child outside of your body.  He'll be there until he's 18."


"I had the baby weeks ago.  Turns out he's extremely gifted and built an architectural marvel in utero.  It's quite large as you can see."

Or the ever popular "Sod off you twunt"

Edited by BadCat, 06 January 2013 - 07:38 AM.


#3 Lucrezia Borgia

Posted 06 January 2013 - 07:44 AM

QUOTE (BadCat @ 06/01/2013, 08:37 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Or the ever popular "Sod off you twunt"

Ok, I'm going to say it: EB needs a "like" button!

#4 Sancti-mummy

Posted 06 January 2013 - 07:52 AM

How about "f*** off, I have just grown a whole human being."

#5 froglett

Posted 06 January 2013 - 08:04 AM

My father in law upon seeing me for the first time since DS was born (4 wks earlier) "so have you lost your jelly belly yet?"  My internal response (since I have a brain to mouth filter I didn't say iti but wanted to!) "yes, have you?"  He is quite a well padded gentleman. And I'd lost everything bar 3kgs, and thanks to some strategically placed spandex the mummy tummy was rather flat!
I think when it comes to pregnancy/new babies people lose the ability to stop inappropriate things from flying out of their mouths.

#6 asdf89

Posted 06 January 2013 - 08:10 AM

Are these people she actually knows (i.e. friends and family) saying this, or strangers?

I imagine people she actually cares about would know she's had the baby... strangers making comments about your friends weight deserve a dirty nappy thrown in their general direction.

(side note: I don't understand why people seem to think pregnant women and their bodies are public property and are available for the general public's comment and touch)

#7 Bunsen the feral

Posted 06 January 2013 - 08:14 AM

Best said with a withering tone that implies you are incredibly bored by the whole conversation:

"oh f*** the f*** off"

#8 Swarley

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:06 AM

QUOTE
Or the ever popular "Sod off you twunt"


I was thinking something along these lines, with more F words Tounge1.gif

#9 Stellajoy

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:11 AM

QUOTE
"Haven't you had that baby yet?"


just say "not yet, due next week"

then quickly fire off..

"but i didnt know YOU were pregnant!" ...then look at their belly... give it a little rub too.

#10 HRH Countrymel

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:12 AM

Nothing witty to add.

I just wanted to share what DP said when I showed him some paparazzi shots of Reese Witherspoon - who is (as always) keeping it real with her 'post baby' body. (no lippo/tummy tucking for Reese three months on)

"Oh hubba hubba luscious Reece! Yummy, yummy Mummy!

#11 casime

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:23 AM

"I can lose weight.  You however, will always be a rude t*at."

#12 Steggles

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:27 AM

What is this? A--hole day?

#13 JuliaGulia

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:38 AM

QUOTE (countrymel @ 06/01/2013, 10:12 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Nothing witty to add.

I just wanted to share what DP said when I showed him some paparazzi shots of Reese Witherspoon - who is (as always) keeping it real with her 'post baby' body. (no lippo/tummy tucking for Reese three months on)

"Oh hubba hubba luscious Reece! Yummy, yummy Mummy!


I'm more than 5 years post baby, and I'd kill to look like that!

#14 HRH Countrymel

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:59 AM

QUOTE (JuliaGulia @ 06/01/2013, 10:38 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm more than 5 years post baby, and I'd kill to look like that!



Hey I've never given birth and so would I!

I was just pleased that she hadn't gone all Victoria Beckham or  those other actresses who revert to sticks with 10 hours a day of exercising and surgery - it was nice to see a woman who (lets face it) makes her (considerable) living from her appearance with thighs that touched and a tummy that was convex not concave for a change.




0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

The popular baby name from the Rio Olympics

"With a pair of athletes who are not only successful, but seen as great role models – combined with a softer sound – it is like hitting the jackpot."

Toy stuck in baby's throat for two weeks

When Jude Atiga's baby son Laith was struggling to breathe the worried mum called an ambulance.

Mum awarded $20 million over birth power struggle with nurses

As a mother of three, Caroline Malatesta thought she knew what she was letting herself in for when it came to the birth of her fourth baby.

Win a Baby Jogger City Premier for Father's Day

To celebrate Father's Day, one lucky EB fan will win one of their own! Enter Now!

'There's a giant picture of BOOBS but I can not feed my child'

A mum was ushered out of an US department store's underwear section after discreetly breastfeeding her baby.

Why fatherhood scares many dads-to-be

Travis Bull vividly remembers discovering his partner was pregnant for the first time.

Free ticket offer

Pinky Mckay joins us again at the Essential Baby & Toddler Show presented by Blackmores with her expert baby settling advice. Register now for your free ticket.

Warning for pregnant women as flu-related deaths triple

A more than three-fold increase in flu-related deaths has sparked a plea for those with the flu to stay away from vulnerable people.

I'm trying to keep my child-free friends in my life, but it's tough

I tried to prove to my single friends that I was the same I'd always been. But marriage did change me - and motherhood has, too

For the festival lover in all of us

Pre-book & Save 50%. Get your tickets now for Kidtopia Festival. 7-9 October 2016 Parramatta Park, Sydney.

Too many parents still putting babies in unsafe bedding: study

A study found that a whopping 91 per cent of four-week-old babies had been placed in cots with unsafe bedding.

Mum's shock as toddler fat-shamed by internet trolls

When a mother uploaded a cute photograph of her 14-month old child online, she did not expect a swarm of internet trolls to write that her toddler was fat.

How an Aldi staff member made one exhausted mum's day

It was a simple act of kindness, but one that made an exhausted mother's day.

The most awww-worthy celeb baby pics of the week

It's been a pretty cute week on Instagram in terms of celebs relishing their babies.

When 'Just Do It' just doesn't cut it

When even Michelle Bridges admits to struggling with her exercise regime, it's time to accept that having small children can be a legitimate reason for exercise not happening.

What life is really like when you have five kids

Life is cute with one, manageable with three, but at times completely impossible with five.

When no one can pronounce your baby's name

In Wales it's a common name, but over here, it's cause for some confusion.

Dad shares horror tale after Roomba's run-in with dog poop

It's the poop story that's been shared hundreds of thousands of times around the world.

How a homemade wheelchair is giving baby Evelyn freedom

Like all one-year-olds, Evelyn Moore is keen to get moving and explore the world around her. But a battle with aggressive cancer left the little girl paralysed from the waist down.

Single to double pram that folds with seat attached

A pram is a large purchase, and you only want to buy once.

Mum-to-be surprises husband with big news in joy-filled photoshoot

When Bri Dow learnt that she was expecting, she immediately knew she wanted to break the news to her husband Brandon in a special way.

Blake Lively: 'Post-pregnancy slim down pressure is so unfair'

Blake Lively has urged women not to feel pressured to lose weight after pregnancy.

 
Advertisement
 

Top 5 Articles

Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

For the festival lover in all of us

Pre-book & Save 50%. Get your tickets now for Kidtopia Festival. 7-9 October 2016 Parramatta Park, Sydney.

Why drinking water can be deadly for babies

H2O is one of the necessities of life, but for babies a seemingly harmless amount of water can be fatal.

5 ways having a baby is different when you have older children

So much parenting advice is geared towards having your first baby, but what's it like having a baby when you already have children?

You can now make your own plush Falkor

Fans of The NeverEnding Story – of which there are certainly plenty – went crazy for these plush Falkors when they first went on sale last year.

Baby steps

10 things that will actually happen after having a baby

I thought I had prepared myself for motherhood. Then my baby girl arrived and knocked everything flat.

Having a baby: expectations vs reality

People love to warn you about what to expect when having a baby, but they can be way off when it comes to the reality.

Are we having fun yet? Thinking positively as a parent

Motherhood is wonderful ... except when it sucks.

The adorable smile of a baby seeing his mum clearly for the first time

There is no doubt seeing their child smile for the first time is an unforgettable moment for parents everywhere.

When breastfeeding doesn't go with the flow

Breast is best, except when it's not. And in our case, it most definitely wasn't.

'If you don't vaccinate your kids you're a bloody idiot'

The photos are heartbreaking and almost too difficult to look at, but Kayley Burke is begging other parents to take notice.

Why pregnant women should eat chocolate

In news that will make expectant mums jump for joy - and reach for a block of Cadbury - scientists have revealed chocolate could provide health benefits during pregnancy.

The baby born with an incredible head of hair

If you're in any way challenged in the follicle department, prepare to feel a jolt of envy - at a two-month-old baby.

The push for Medicare to fund lactation consultants

While meeting with a lactation consultant can make an enormous difference to a new mother, it's not a service that is available through the public health system.

Parents, this is how to cut grapes to avoid choking

One mum has learnt a harrowing lesson about the best way to cut grapes to make it safe for toddlers and little kids to eat.

Three truths about C-section mums

Lately I've been thinking about the caesarean stories and the brave women who birth their children with strength and beauty.

Help! My baby will only sleep in my arms

It's stressful to be the one who is holding your baby most of the day, but it's even more stressful to wonder, 'am I doing something wrong? Or am I creating bad habits?'

 

ENTER NOW

Win one of two Father's Day Gift Packs

Sign up to receive our new Essential Kids announcements emails for a chance to win.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.