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Witty responses to post baby weight comments
What are some of the best you have used

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#1 Honeybake

Posted 06 January 2013 - 07:21 AM

My GF had her 1st baby 11 weeks ago & she is constantly subjected to comments about "When is the baby due?"...."Haven't you had that baby yet?"... ohmy.gif

She looks amazing, in fact she looks 100% better than I do & I had my last baby 2 &1/2 years ago!!!

Obviously being a 1st time Mum, hormonal & sleep deprived, she is understandably a bit rocked by these comments post baby.

So ladies, what are some of the best, wittiest responses you have heard and/or used that stops those commenting in their tracks?


#2 BadCat

Posted 06 January 2013 - 07:37 AM

"I'm testing a new parenting theory called ultra attachment where you never let the child outside of your body.  He'll be there until he's 18."

"I had the baby weeks ago.  Turns out he's extremely gifted and built an architectural marvel in utero.  It's quite large as you can see."

Or the ever popular "Sod off you twunt"

Edited by BadCat, 06 January 2013 - 07:38 AM.

#3 Lucrezia Borgia

Posted 06 January 2013 - 07:44 AM

QUOTE (BadCat @ 06/01/2013, 08:37 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Or the ever popular "Sod off you twunt"

Ok, I'm going to say it: EB needs a "like" button!

#4 Sancti-mummy

Posted 06 January 2013 - 07:52 AM

How about "f*** off, I have just grown a whole human being."

#5 froglett

Posted 06 January 2013 - 08:04 AM

My father in law upon seeing me for the first time since DS was born (4 wks earlier) "so have you lost your jelly belly yet?"  My internal response (since I have a brain to mouth filter I didn't say iti but wanted to!) "yes, have you?"  He is quite a well padded gentleman. And I'd lost everything bar 3kgs, and thanks to some strategically placed spandex the mummy tummy was rather flat!
I think when it comes to pregnancy/new babies people lose the ability to stop inappropriate things from flying out of their mouths.

#6 asdf89

Posted 06 January 2013 - 08:10 AM

Are these people she actually knows (i.e. friends and family) saying this, or strangers?

I imagine people she actually cares about would know she's had the baby... strangers making comments about your friends weight deserve a dirty nappy thrown in their general direction.

(side note: I don't understand why people seem to think pregnant women and their bodies are public property and are available for the general public's comment and touch)

#7 Bunsen the feral

Posted 06 January 2013 - 08:14 AM

Best said with a withering tone that implies you are incredibly bored by the whole conversation:

"oh f*** the f*** off"

#8 Swarley

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:06 AM

Or the ever popular "Sod off you twunt"

I was thinking something along these lines, with more F words Tounge1.gif

#9 Stellajoy

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:11 AM

"Haven't you had that baby yet?"

just say "not yet, due next week"

then quickly fire off..

"but i didnt know YOU were pregnant!" ...then look at their belly... give it a little rub too.

#10 HRH Countrymel

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:12 AM

Nothing witty to add.

I just wanted to share what DP said when I showed him some paparazzi shots of Reese Witherspoon - who is (as always) keeping it real with her 'post baby' body. (no lippo/tummy tucking for Reese three months on)

"Oh hubba hubba luscious Reece! Yummy, yummy Mummy!

#11 casime

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:23 AM

"I can lose weight.  You however, will always be a rude t*at."

#12 Steggles

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:27 AM

What is this? A--hole day?

#13 JuliaGulia

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:38 AM

QUOTE (countrymel @ 06/01/2013, 10:12 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Nothing witty to add.

I just wanted to share what DP said when I showed him some paparazzi shots of Reese Witherspoon - who is (as always) keeping it real with her 'post baby' body. (no lippo/tummy tucking for Reese three months on)

"Oh hubba hubba luscious Reece! Yummy, yummy Mummy!

I'm more than 5 years post baby, and I'd kill to look like that!

#14 HRH Countrymel

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:59 AM

QUOTE (JuliaGulia @ 06/01/2013, 10:38 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'm more than 5 years post baby, and I'd kill to look like that!

Hey I've never given birth and so would I!

I was just pleased that she hadn't gone all Victoria Beckham or  those other actresses who revert to sticks with 10 hours a day of exercising and surgery - it was nice to see a woman who (lets face it) makes her (considerable) living from her appearance with thighs that touched and a tummy that was convex not concave for a change.

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