Jump to content

Post hospital midwifery visits


  • Please log in to reply
19 replies to this topic

#1 OneProudMum

Posted 05 January 2013 - 08:45 AM

When both of my children were born and we left the hospital we had a visit from a Dom. Midwife who checked in on us and even checked our bedding for baby. Is this some sort of requirement or is it a service?
Can you decline the service?


Edited by OneProudMum, 05 January 2013 - 08:47 AM.


#2 akkiandmalli

Posted 05 January 2013 - 08:50 AM

It depends on the hospital. I know if your doing well at Mercy they come once but if thre are issues they will come again.
Declining ? I think you have to mention at the hospital when you have your baby.
Is there a reason you don't want a Dom to come?

#3 Phascogale

Posted 05 January 2013 - 08:50 AM

Yes you can certainly decline.  The hospital won't mind.  A lot of hospitals provide this because of the shorter stays.  It's more prevalent in the public system.  Some private hospitals also provide this but only for earlier than expected discharges.

However if you have a child that's not breastfeeding well or there are some other issues then it would probably be wise to have the appointment otherwise it will be a few more days (or a week or two) before you see the MCHN.

ETA:  I had a fairly good experience with DD3 (didn't get the visites with the others).  They never checked my bedding or anything.  They were more worried about the baby.  With DD3 she was having daily blood tests for her bilirubin levels.

But other visits that I know usually involve the newborn screen (as mum's left before this was done) and making sure that breastfeeding is going okay.  And just asking the mum about how she's going.  But like someone mentioned, it may very well be down to the individual midwife as to what's done.

If someone does come out and you aren't happy with them, make a complaint or speak to the NUM.  It's not necessarily a bad thing, but rather feedback for the midwife to modify her practice.  It may be that other mums feel the same but just haven't said anything.

Edited by Phascogale, 05 January 2013 - 09:13 AM.


#4 dirtgirl

Posted 05 January 2013 - 08:51 AM

Of course you can decline the service if you want to. When you are released from the hospital, you are no longer officially under the hospital's care, however the at-home service is provided as additional support for new mothers.
I really appreciated the visit from the Dom nurse...but I'm sure if you tell them they you don't want a visit, they will oblige.

#5 Madeline's Mum

Posted 05 January 2013 - 08:57 AM

I wish I had of declined. That woman did nothing but criticise my breast feeding, give misinformation re breast feeding and make me feel like a failure for DS not gaining enough weight.

But my experience could have been completely different had I had of had a different midwife come to visit.

#6 OneProudMum

Posted 05 January 2013 - 09:10 AM

I found part of her service beneficial but I also felt part of it as a bit of an invasion. Perhaps I just struck a bad one.

She gave me lectures about having indoor pets etc.

There was also a questionnaire that we had to go through at the hospital prior to the midwife coming with questions about weapons, drugs etc. which I found odd.

Edited by OneProudMum, 05 January 2013 - 09:17 AM.


#7 kjdean1988

Posted 05 January 2013 - 09:21 AM

I was asked to sign a "Consent to Contact" form. Basically it was to approve the maternity outreach program contacting me after being in hospital. They came twice. Day 2 & 5 of being home and all they did was weigh DS and check my incision from c-section. Im sure your well within your right to decline them coming as anything they do you can have down at your 6 week check up. I probably won't have them next time. I did this time as i didn't know what to expect (FTM)

#8 Batmansunderpants

Posted 05 January 2013 - 09:25 AM

QUOTE (OneProudMum @ 05/01/2013, 10:10 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I found part of her service beneficial but I also felt part of it as a bit of an invasion. Perhaps I just struck a bad one.

She gave me lectures about having indoor pets etc.

There was also a questionnaire that we had to go through at the hospital prior to the midwife coming with questions about weapons, drugs etc. which I found odd.


They ask about weapons and drugs for OH&S risk assessing for the midwife. They need to make sure they won't be mauled by a dog or bet at risk from people in the home.

#9 ElysianLyric

Posted 05 January 2013 - 09:26 AM

I really appreciated the at-home visits after both kids were born, but I was lucky enough to have great midwives each time.

We were part of the early discharge program with both, and I liked having the peace and comfort of being at home rather than in a busy ward, with an hour or so of uninterrupted time with the midwife to ask all my questions and have all the usual medical checks.

Neither time did the midwives seem concerned with my living arrangements - it was more about checking my recovery, making sure the baby was well, offering feeding/settling advice (super helpful the first time around) and doing the normal range of infant blood tests and checks. They didn't discharge me til I felt ready, and were happy to continue visits had I been struggling with anything. I had a friend continue to see her midwife for weeks while she navigated a torn nipple, thrush and mastitis with her first. She really appreciated the care she received.

But as everyone agrees, it will totally depend on the midwife you get - so often they're fabulous which means it's really disappointing to come up against one who isn't helpful or encouraging. Just like with labour and birth, I guess - a great midwife makes all the difference to your experience.

#10 Soontobegran

Posted 05 January 2013 - 09:39 AM

You can decline but ensure you make it quite clear when you are in hospital though.

I did Dom for a year once when the Dom midwife was on maternity leave and I was always welcomed with open arms and heaps of questions. It was actually pretty hard to get out of some homes but these were mostly first time mums. Experienced mums don't necessarily need the service as rule and I found are less likely to take aboard any advice as they have found their appropriate way to manage.

I understand that not all visiting midwives are created equal but if they check your baby bedding it is not because they are out to catch you out it is because it is their duty of care to ensure you are following SIDS recommendations. There is also a duty of care to ensure that you are well, that you have food, that you have support and that your home is generally a safe environment for everyone. You can imagine how it would be to ignore the fact that the baby was sleeping in a bassinette with a bumper and a mountain of soft toys only for it to die from SIDS.
I know some people feel offended, one of my DD's felt she was having her common sense questioned but after I explained why she asked what she did she felt better about it.
The questions with regards to weapons/drugs and pets are routine. Hospitals can not send out their staff into dangerous situations. I worked in Dom before this type of red tape was brought in and some of the places I went to were definitely extremely frightening.
The District Nurse service also has the same questionaire, it is routine and is not implying that they think you are dodgy.

Just remember, mention this before you leave hospital, save the Dom nurse from travelling for an hour only to find you are not home/will not open the door because there will be someone else who could really have benefited from that wasted time original.gif

#11 Soontobegran

Posted 05 January 2013 - 09:43 AM

QUOTE (ElysianLyric @ 05/01/2013, 10:26 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
.

Neither time did the midwives seem concerned with my living arrangements


A good midwife should be able to check without appearing to pry. There is a lot of general 'scanning' done and something only said if they believe that something could be a risk.

I do get that not all are so subtle.

#12 Chelara

Posted 05 January 2013 - 09:50 AM

The one for my DS came half an hour early (I was in the shower) she regularly works in the area so not like she expected it would take a while to find my place or get here. Commented several times about how cold my home was and that the floor boards made it cold (I just found that rude, it was winter but 10:30 am and Sydney, we don't run he heater all day), she made me turn the heater on. She was concerned that my dh and older dd weren't there (dh had taken dd to playgroup) as I'd said they might be there, she asked if I was abused as a child in front of my mum. I wished I'd declined the visit, she had no manners at all.

#13 strawberrycakes

Posted 05 January 2013 - 09:51 AM

I had one visit after DD was born, she was lovely.  Did the foot prick test & checked over DD & myself.  When the foot prick test didn't go to plan & DD was rather upset she suggested she try again whilst DD breastfed to help calm her. Worked a treat & the midwife was also able to see that DD was feeding wonderfully.

It was the midwife who suggested that she didn't see a reason why she should return but gave me her number if I wanted her to come back.



#14 .:Natty:.

Posted 05 January 2013 - 09:56 AM

I has a rude one with my third, refused to sit on my lounge so I had to go find her a seat to sit on :/ Told me I had to go lock my other two into their bedrooms so they didn't disturb her. Then went on to tell me my 3yr old had jealousy issues about the new baby and needed disciplining. Um no she has just got a new sister she is excited.
However the nurse that came out for dd2 was lovely and understanding at how difficult it was for me to have a new baby and a 12month old.

#15 Another one

Posted 05 January 2013 - 10:08 AM

QUOTE (OneProudMum @ 05/01/2013, 10:10 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I found part of her service beneficial but I also felt part of it as a bit of an invasion. Perhaps I just struck a bad one.

She gave me lectures about having indoor pets etc.

There was also a questionnaire that we had to go through at the hospital prior to the midwife coming with questions about weapons, drugs etc. which I found odd.



QUOTE (.:Natty:. @ 05/01/2013, 10:56 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I has a rude one with my third, refused to sit on my lounge so I had to go find her a seat to sit on :/ Told me I had to go lock my other two into their bedrooms so they didn't disturb her. Then went on to tell me my 3yr old had jealousy issues about the new baby and needed disciplining. Um no she has just got a new sister she is excited.
However the nurse that came out for dd2 was lovely and understanding at how difficult it was for me to have a new baby and a 12month old.


Wow I am speechless at the experiences some people have had..  With DD the midwife was an older lady (at a guess I'd say in her early 60s) and she was fantastic and gave me so much common sense advice on things I'd struggled with in the first few days at home.  She also booked in a second visit as DD was slow gaining weight.  The second one was also fantastic.  DD came before our house was finished so she came and weighed her etc in our soon to be study where we had DD set up in the bassinet off her pram with a heater while DH, myself, mum and dad and my sister all worked on finishing the house so we could move in (we were living next door at the time).  Then the council MCHN came and she too was fantastic (if a little ditzy).

With DS I had the dom care midwife come every day for on the Sunday when DS was two days old (DDs birthday) so she had to work around visiting family, DDS excitement at presents and so on.  She was fantastic.  I'd had a caesar with DD and recovered much better than me vaginal birth with DS so she gave me some great advice on recovery.

Then DS went back to the hospital on the Monday with jaundice and after we were released on the Wednesday the Dom Care nurses came every day for a little over a week to track his bilirubin levels.  I couldn't fault the care they gave us.  I wish everyone had the same experiences.

#16 OneProudMum

Posted 05 January 2013 - 10:15 AM

My experience wasn't particularly bad. I would still utilise the service. I just wondered whether it was some sort of requirement. I suppose because the hospital where I give birth is not overly open about patients rights etc. and you kind of get the impression you don't have the choice.

We only had 1 visit. She was quite good, she just made a couple of comments about pets and I felt she was being a bit judgmental which is a bit hard to swallow in those first few days.

#17 Oriental lily

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:01 AM

My experience has mostly been good.
With my last child however  she tried to bully me to sign up for a triple p parenting course.

It made me feel a bit defensive. I had a little whinge about how hard it was to have a school age child, a two year old and newborn and she then spent the next 10 minutes encouraging me to get help.

I felt it was a bit if an overreaction on her behalf.

It was totally in the zone of baby blues and she made me feel I was not coping.

Looking back now I was fine. Just tired and a little overwhelmed.I just needed a bit of a sook and a kind word of encouragement.

Not enrolled in parenting lessons.!

Other than that i have enjoyed the visits.

Normally they need to finish up filling up the blue book anyway and the heel prick test needs done.

Also reassuring to know that weight gain is going up, not down.

#18 kadoodle

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:12 AM

QUOTE (soontobegran @ 05/01/2013, 10:39 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It was actually pretty hard to get out of some homes but these were mostly first time mums. e.


Sorry.

When the Dom Midwife came to see me after DS1, I was totally freaked at the idea of a boy and she had to stay and chat and reassure me that foreskins were not all that frightening and that he'd grow into his nose.

Is there a commission on signing people up for the Triple P course?  It's pushed everywhere since I had DS2.


#19 FeralLIfeHacker

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:15 AM

..

Edited by lifehacker, 13 January 2013 - 11:29 AM.


#20 TheVerticalPronoun

Posted 05 January 2013 - 12:20 PM

I'm not familiar with the phrase 'Dom care midwife', but I had 3 visits from hospital midwives after coming home. They were pretty awful. I. Had two different midwives, and they both came in and just talked AT me for about two hours, rather then discussing my concerns etc. They both also tended to focus on the negatives, like spending 40 minutes going into exactly what would happen if the baby hadn't gained enough weight BEFORE weighing the baby. He'd gained plenty, so that was 40 minutes of worrying and lecturing I didn't need!


I also found it quite rich that they spent so long telling me how I needed to be getting plenty of rest and eating enough, while I was exhausted and starving, waiting for them to leave so I could do just that. They were both just quite stern and bossy, rather than supportive and helpful.


It was such a shame, because I birthed in a birth centre with wonderful midwives, but because I live quite far from the centre I had to have visits from local hospital midwives.


I probably wouldn't decline the visits next time (unless everything went perfectly, but this time I had a lot of swelling and bruising, as well as an episiotomy) but I would be a lot more assertive and not try to follow all their ridiculous instructions. One of them told me I should be having four to six showers a day, and 12 hours sleep!


I can't discuss them at all without getting quite ranty.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Tell us what you think

to WIN 1 of 2 $500 Coles/Myer gift cards

Dealing with a toddler's morning tantrums

Your schedule is not important to your two-year-old, and you cannot convince her otherwise. So what can you do?

Child in suitcase 'could have died eight years ago'

A child whose remains were dumped in a suitcase in the South Australian bush is believed to have been a girl aged between two-and-a-half to four.

MP breastfeeds baby during parliamentary session

An Argentinian mum and politician has caused a stir on social media after being filmed breastfeeding her baby.

My baby's first seizure

It was 1am on a cold winter's night when I woke suddenly to the screams of my 12-month-old son. Our lives were about to change forever.

Portable pools 'more dangerous than permanent ones'

Inflatable and portable children's pools may be required to be sold with compulsory fencing to prevent backyard drownings, with some experts even floating the idea of a ban.

Heartbreaking moment mum kisses her one-week-old goodbye

At 11.07am on April 2 this year, Sarah Marriott welcomed baby Sebastian into the world.

The amazing Tee Pee bed and kid-friendly Frankie Bunk bed

These kids' beds definitely fit the brief of providing personality and personal space for little people who are moving up in the world.

The funny things kids say when you're pregnant

Since becoming noticeably pregnant, my son has taken more of an interest in the sibling he'll soon have.

The real problem with having one child

In this age of political correctness, it seems the one subject still subject to discrimination is that of the Only Child.

Six-week-old baby found dead, believed stabbed

A neighbour heard a child screaming before a baby was found dead, believed to have been stabbed, in a house in Newcastle.

The fire hazard in more than 70,000 Australian homes

So far, 206 Samsung washing machines have caught fire and some have exploded. But many remain in people's homes.

How having a baby can bring on OCD

We all know that having a baby can turn your life upside down - and it can also bring a raft of new anxieties and worries.

IVF gender selection being considered for Australian parents

Couples using IVF may be able to choose the gender of their babies and women could be financially compensated for donating their eggs.

The best age to get married (according to the latest study)

Not too young, and not too old. That's reportedly the best age to get married. Not everyone agrees.

Yes, you can get pregnant before your period returns post-baby

After giving birth, the last thing you want to think about is contraception. But you can get pregnant before your period comes back.

Fellow diner rewards mum after toddler's tantrum

Parents of toddlers everywhere know the feeling. After working up the courage to take your child out for lunch or dinner in public you are rewarded with a mid-meal meltdown. 

IKEA begins massive safety campaign after two toddler deaths

Two children were killed when pieces from their Malm furniture line tipped over.

Beaneasy: sweet nursery furniture with a twist

If you're looking to introduce an organic element into your baby's nursery but want to step away from natural timber, we have the perfect alternative.

A dad's guide to hyperemesis

I am in no way qualified to advise women on how to cope with hyperemesis, but I've learnt some lessons that might be worth sharing with other partners.

Woman adopts best friend's four daughters after cancer tragedy

Best friends share everything - and for these two life-long friends, that includes family.

Baby Leo's mum excluded from $500K trust 'for her own protection'

Samuel Forrest didn't want his wife as a trustee of their baby Leo's half million dollar trust for her own "protection", it has emerged.

Confirmed: men gain weight when they become dads

Men who become fathers experience weight gain and an increase in body mass index, a measurement of body fat based on height and weight, according to a new, large-scale study

Carer investigated over washing machine photo posted 'for a laugh'

She said the photo of a boy with Down syndrome in a washing machine was taken just for fun, but no one else was laughing.

Mum's premature labour nightmare after high tea salmonella outbreak

An opulent high tea at a luxury Melbourne hotel has left 44 people with salmonella poisoning - including a pregnant woman, who went into early labour.

The day my son started a fire

Would you know what to do in a fire emergency? How safe is your home and family?

Prince George celebrates second birthday

Prince George's second birthday has been marked by the release of an official picture showing the toddler smiling as he is held by his proud beaming father.

Which beauty treatments are safe in pregnancy?

Is it safe to use fake tan, hair dye and nail varnish during pregnancy?

The five ways I know my 'baby' is no longer a baby

The truth is, I can no longer deny that my walking, babbling, somewhat-independent little miss is no longer a bona fide 'baby'.

Review: Cybex Platinum PRIAM pram

I'm not usually one who believes in love at first sight but that's exactly what happened when I first saw the Cybex PRIAM.

Get your FREE Baby & Toddler Show ticket!

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Tell us what you think

to WIN 1 of 2 $500 Coles/Myer gift cards

Why I'm choosing to be a single mother right from the start

I believe that you get out of families what you put into them, and I will give mine my all.

Mother and baby units are a necessity for mental health, not a luxury

I have had two postnatal psychotic episodes. The first when my eldest child was six weeks old, and another after my second child was born.

30 French baby names

French names are always in fashion, but a few have risen in popularity in recent years.

New mum's Spanish maternity nightmare

A British woman who gave birth in Spain has told of her ordeal after spending weeks trying to convince medics the baby girl was hers.

Preparing Rover to be a good dog with baby

Some friends of ours say that it's dangerous to have a dog around a newborn and that we should start looking for a new home for him. Is it?

Company offers to ship working mums' breast milk home

First Apple and Facebook announced they would pay $20,000 towards the cost of their female employees freezing their eggs, now IBM in the US has come up with an innovative new policy aimed at retaining female employees.

Prince William speaks of his pride at wife Kate and 'little joy of heaven' Charlotte

The Duke of Cambridge opened up about family life and his plans for the future in an interview to mark his first day as an air ambulance pilot.

'Glowing' eye saves baby Mason's life

A simple photo taken in front of an evening fire gave new mother Sarah Bowers the power to save her baby's life. 

Parenting and decision overload

Of all the advice people told me before having a baby, no one warned me about the amount of decisions involved.

Proof that toddlers can't be left unsupervised - ever

Parents of toddlers all know the moment when realise your child is being suspiciously quiet. It can only mean one thing - trouble!

Meet Jeremy Ryan, The Voice contestant with seven kids

If you have trouble recalling the ages of Jeremy Ryan's seven children on The Voice, you're not alone. So does he.

Baby's adorable reaction to wearing glasses for the first time

Getting glasses can be a formative moment in a person's life.

Police officer buys supplies for family after mum of six caught shoplifting

When a mum of six was caught shoplifting nappies, clothes and shoes for her kids, the last thing she expected was for a stranger to pay for her haul.

Why pregnant women on antidepressants shouldn’t panic about birth defect claims

The risk of having uncontrolled depression is far greater than the small increased risk of birth defects that may be associated with specific antidepressants.

Arrests made over children's birthday party brawl

Police have raided properties and arrested a number of people over a brawl at a child's birthday party at a play centre in Sydney's west.

Family shares awesome drone baby announcement

Looking for a creative way to share some big news? Look to the skies, like this family did.

Young warrior Owen defies doctors' predictions

Little Owen DiCandilo's name means "young warrior", and it's a description that perfectly fits the inspiring 18-month-old

Advice for dads: when to approach your wife for sex

The exhaustion that comes with caring for young children often means romance between parents becomes a thing of the past.

I might be fat, but I don't need saving

I've been fat for pretty much most of life, besides a few crazy moments of being less-fat, but for the most part I've existed on this earth with a little more meat on my bones than desirable.

The rookie mistakes we make as parents

Since the dawn of civilisation, generation after generation of new parents have had to rely on instinct, trial and error - and sometimes get it wrong.

 

FREE TICKET

See Pinky McKay live in Sydney

Get your free ticket to The Essential Baby & Toddler Show and save $20 - register online now!

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.