Jump to content

spin off - no rsvps


  • Please log in to reply
16 replies to this topic

#1 swimmingalong

Posted 04 January 2013 - 05:00 PM

If you'd booked a playcenter or the local pool or similar and people turned up to drop their child off for the party and they hadn't rsvp'd at all....

Would you tell the parent that because you hadnt been rsvp'd and therefore didn't expect the child to come that the parent would have to pay for their own child?

Would you still do lolly bags for the kids who hadn't rsvp'd or tell them that mummy didn't tell me you were coming so I didn't make you one?

#2 Halcyon~

Posted 04 January 2013 - 05:07 PM

I don't have it in me to turn them away.
I always do extra lolly bags just in case

#3 swimmingalong

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:41 PM

to expand:  given that in the venting thread a lot of people said it was rude not to rsvp, I was wondering how many people would actually draw a line in the sand and let it be known that these sort of people are rude?


#4 swimmingalong

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:41 PM

to expand:  given that in the venting thread a lot of people said it was rude not to rsvp, I was wondering how many people would actually draw a line in the sand and let it be known that these sort of people are rude?


#5 robot sm

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:43 PM

I don't think I'd do anything to potentially exclude the kids like not giving them a lolly bag or telling the parents to pay themselves, but I would probably mention to the parents - 'oh! I didn't get your RSVP!'

#6 Therese

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:46 PM

I would never say anything to the kids, I would just make extra lolly bags. As robotsimone said I would probably say to the parent something about not getting their RSVP but I would never say anything to the child. It's not their fault their parent didn't reply.

#7 baddmammajamma

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:52 PM

I doubt I will ever find myself in this situation because we know all of the parents of our children's classmates, and I've been known to hunt down wayward RSVPs. I like to know my numbers!

HOWEVER, hypothetically speaking, if I had no RSVPs:

QUOTE (Therese @ 04/01/2013, 08:46 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I would never say anything to the kids, I would just make extra lolly bags. As robotsimone said I would probably say to the parent something about not getting their RSVP but I would never say anything to the child. It's not their fault their parent didn't reply.



#8 SplashingRainbows

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:55 PM

There are ways to let people know their behaviour is rude, without exhibiting rude behaviour yourself.

I think both proposed behaviours in your op are rude and I wouldn't feel comfortable doing either.  If you were truly out of party bags you could very genuinely apologise to the guests you weren't expecting by explaining that you only catered for those who replied, however I would hope I would have plenty of spares.


#9 RedBob

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:57 PM

What Therese said. I'd never take it out on the kids, it's not their fault.

#10 Funwith3

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:18 PM

Id never say something to the child... but then again I'd never let it get to that point. If I haven't heard back from parents I contact them myself and establish whether or not the child is coming. If I hadn't heard anything, I think I'd make them a lolly bag just in case.

Upon their arrival id probably be a smarty and say "oh its good your child could make it, I didn't know whether or not she was coming!!" I think that would get a subtle message through!

#11 erindiv

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:24 PM

I'd be saying "Oh, I didn't get your RSVP! I hope I have enough spare things for a lolly bag. So sorry, I didn't know you were coming!"

Chances are you being so apologetic and flustered will make them feel guilty.

How are these people supposed to learn if nothing gets said? Of course have enough for extras, don't take it out on the kids, but don't just let it slide.

#12 SeaPrincess

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:29 PM

It depends how many there were.  I've read of some people potentially changing their plans due to such low numbers of RSVP attendees - in that case it's their bad luck if they turn up to the original venue and its not on.

I wouldn't make more than 5 extra goody bags.

And if there was a safety/supervision issue such as at a swimming pool and I didn't think I had enough people to adequately supervise the extras who turned up, then yes I would ask the parents to stay, but not to pay for their own child.

Edited by SeaPrincess, 05 January 2013 - 11:29 PM.


#13 allthiseffortpaidoff

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:30 PM

You're at a catered event, right?

Play centre etc... so you're budgeting...?

I would make extra loot bags, but I wouldn't be paying for anyone that hadn't RSVP'd to a 'paid' event.



#14 bailee

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:33 PM

Whenever we've been to a play centre for a party they have always had a list at the door for those that have rsvp'd. Anyone who hasn't then gets stopped and the host has to be found and asked if it's ok to add this child, etc. So the parent gets the message that their RSVP wasn't received and their child could have been turned away. I would prepare a lolly bag and accept the child but probably wouldn't add the child to list cause then you automatically get charged even if they don't turn up. Well thats how it works around here anyway, but we don't really have that many that don't RSVP.

#15 erindiv

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:36 PM

QUOTE (bailee @ 06/01/2013, 12:33 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Whenever we've been to a play centre for a party they have always had a list at the door for those that have rsvp'd. Anyone who hasn't then gets stopped and the host has to be found and asked if it's ok to add this child, etc. So the parent gets the message that their RSVP wasn't received and their child could have been turned away. I would prepare a lolly bag and accept the child but probably wouldn't add the child to list cause then you automatically get charged even if they don't turn up. Well thats how it works around here anyway, but we don't really have that many that don't RSVP.



I'd be telling the play centre to charge people who weren't on the list  ph34r.gif

#16 JRA

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:21 PM

QUOTE (baddmammajamma @ 04/01/2013, 07:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I doubt I will ever find myself in this situation because we know all of the parents of our children's classmates, and I've been known to hunt down wayward RSVPs. I like to know my numbers

Yes, same here.

I must admit I am not sure if I have needed to chase anyone though

#17 Holidayromp

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:35 PM

This is a tough one because it isn't as simple as making up an extra lolly bag because I plan to the exact amount of children.
There are only a set number of places at the table
There is only a set number of wrapping around pass the parcel
There are ony a set number of prizes in a treasure hunt.

I am sorry but I am not going to stuff around with trying to fit an extra seat in (and trying to find something that will do as a seat), trying to wrap another layer of pass the parcel, digging around for non-existant items for lolly bags when I should be entertaining the kids that I know are coming.  

Same with a play centre party or whatever - they want numbers TWO days before not on the day, not people who just show up.  This is a catered party so if you want to 'squeeze your children in ' because you have been so lazy and so rude so as not to let me know what you are doing means that there is not enough to go around and potentially children miss out on the pre-organised games.  And no I will not pay for your kids because I have budgetted x amount I have pre-paid that amount and I don't have any further money.

Luckily I have not had that happen to me and it is going to put me in a god awful position if it does because I only plan for people that RSVP - not for people who don't, not for mind changes and certainly not for any hangers on.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

WIN an exclusive performance from Sam Moran!

To celebrate the DVD release of children?s musical series Play Along with Sam, we?re giving one lucky parent the chance to have Sam perform at their child?s preschool or daycare centre!

Touching memorial service for siege victim Katrina Dawson

In a moving memorial attended by more than 1500 people, the mother of three and talented barrister was remembered as an "extraordinary" woman.

Lyndey Milan's 10 best baking tips

Whipping up a cake or biscuits need never instil fear again.

Princess of Sweden pregnant with second baby

Princess Madeleine of Sweden is expecting her second baby, only 10 months after her first.

Video: Kids excited by world's worst Christmas gifts

Struggling to find last minute stocking fillers before Santa's visit this week? If this cute video is anything to go by just raid the fruit bowl in order to keep your kids happy.

Elton John and David Furnish marry after 21 years together

British musician Elton John has married his long-term partner David Furnish, converting their civil partnership after laws allowing gay marriage in Britain came into force this year.

Gorgeous toddler Izzy a model of diversity

With her blond curls and winning smile, it's not surprising little Izzy Bradley was chosen to appear in a toy catalogue for Target in the US.

Mother arrested over deaths of eight children

The mother of seven of the eight children found dead in a Cairns home yesterday has been arrested over their deaths, according to police.

Facebook appeal saves labouring woman's life

A plea for help posted on Facebook helped save the life of a pregnant woman who had spent days in labour in a remote part of Papua New Guinea.

Can nits be romantic?

And so I face the prospect of a Christmas with nits. It was inevitable, really, given the matter of my daughter's recent outbreak.

Former 'N Sync bandmate confirms news of Timberlake-Biel baby

It seems the cat is out of the bag if Joey Fatone is to be believed.

Toddler freed after getting trapped in escalator

A shopping centre escalator needed to be pulled apart to free a toddler's trapped hand.

Why I'm kind of excited about my daughter's nits

Is it weird to say that I am secretly thrilled to find that my daughter Edie has nits?

Baby born at 10:11 on 12-13-14

Well, it's actually 13-12-14 to us over here. But still, Clare Elizabeth Keane's consecutive numerical birth time is pretty special.

On holding tightly and loving fiercely

We can't live in fear. This post is about Christmas and how at this time we should be celebrating life and grateful for what we have: our loved ones who we cherish fiercely.

Babies, relatives and coping with Christmas day

Everyone will love your baby but your baby may not be so happy to be passed around a lot of new people - nor may you want to feed with an audience.

Why I won't be posting pictures of my baby on Facebook

There are pros and cons to this policy.

The myths and truths of gender swaying

Here are a few popular methods hopeful parents-to-be use to try to get a baby of their preferred gender – and what an expert says about whether they really work.

10 easy DIY Christmas decoration ideas

It's officially time to get into the Christmas spirit. Why not branch out when you put up your tree this year and add a personal touch with a few DIY decorations? We've found the perfect easy-to-make ways to put more festive fever into your home.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

The dangerous new trend of glucose challenge test refusal

A dangerous trend is seeing more mothers-to-be declining a relatively simple and painless test to check for gestational diabetes.

Office of Fair Trading reveals naughty toys ahead of Christmas

The Office of Fair Trading has pulled seven toys from shelves ahead of Christmas after they fail safety tests.

Video: Baby boy's trouble with twins

These twin girls will no doubt have fun fooling people in years to come, but nobody will be as confused as baby Landon.

'I tried to kill my baby': one mum's story

After bathing and dressing her three-month-old son, Amanda had a rare moment alone with her baby.

Attack of the 'mummy brain'

I feel that almost every day, someone in my life - be they a friend, family member or complete stranger - feels the need to excuse my behaviour as I have other things on my mind.

Mum of baby who fell ill after drinking raw milk speaks out

A Melbourne mother has described how her son turned grey when he became seriously ill after drinking raw milk.

The disagreement that can break a relationship

If he doesn't change his mind, all I can hope is that I will. It would be a waste to spend the rest of my marriage mourning a baby that never was.

Australian divorce rate lowest since 1976

Modern newlyweds are now well into their 30s and marriage still offers something powerful a new book argues.

Young mum burns 'from inside-out'

A young mum is in intensive care after she took a friend's antibiotic and wound up with an ailment that is burning her body 'from the inside-out'.

The aftermath of a traumatic birth experience

In Australia, 30 per cent of women find their birth experience traumatic, with 6 per cent going on to develop post traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

Long-term reversible male contraceptive on its way

Men could soon have access to an injectable long-term contraceptive which works in a similar way to a vasectomy but promises to be easily reversed.

Co-sleeping or no-sleeping? Mum videos worst nap ever

One mother's futile attempt to sleep in caught on camera in a hilarious - and very cute - video.

Why children misbehave during the festive season

While we all like to imagine the holiday season as being a fun, loving and bonding experience; often our reality is quiet different.

I was fat-shamed by my doctor

The fear of being weighed is the most significant factor in women cancelling medical appointments - and now weight-shaming has happened to me.

WIN an exclusive performance from Sam Moran!

To celebrate the DVD release of children?s musical series Play Along with Sam, we?re giving one lucky parent the chance to have Sam perform at their child?s preschool or daycare centre!

End of an era: no more childcare

As we reach the end of 2014, we're closing the book on many things for another year, most notably childcare. Our last child has attended childcare for the very last time.

Carers admit to force-feeding children

As Sydney grieves the loss of Sydney siege victims Katrina Dawson and Tori Johnson, reports have suggested that both died as heroes.

 

How many weeks til Christmas?

On your To-Do list

Get the "Santa" shopping done without the kids in tow.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.