Jump to content

spin off - no rsvps


  • Please log in to reply
16 replies to this topic

#1 swimmingalong

Posted 04 January 2013 - 05:00 PM

If you'd booked a playcenter or the local pool or similar and people turned up to drop their child off for the party and they hadn't rsvp'd at all....

Would you tell the parent that because you hadnt been rsvp'd and therefore didn't expect the child to come that the parent would have to pay for their own child?

Would you still do lolly bags for the kids who hadn't rsvp'd or tell them that mummy didn't tell me you were coming so I didn't make you one?

#2 Halcyon~

Posted 04 January 2013 - 05:07 PM

I don't have it in me to turn them away.
I always do extra lolly bags just in case

#3 swimmingalong

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:41 PM

to expand:  given that in the venting thread a lot of people said it was rude not to rsvp, I was wondering how many people would actually draw a line in the sand and let it be known that these sort of people are rude?


#4 swimmingalong

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:41 PM

to expand:  given that in the venting thread a lot of people said it was rude not to rsvp, I was wondering how many people would actually draw a line in the sand and let it be known that these sort of people are rude?


#5 robot sm

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:43 PM

I don't think I'd do anything to potentially exclude the kids like not giving them a lolly bag or telling the parents to pay themselves, but I would probably mention to the parents - 'oh! I didn't get your RSVP!'

#6 Therese

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:46 PM

I would never say anything to the kids, I would just make extra lolly bags. As robotsimone said I would probably say to the parent something about not getting their RSVP but I would never say anything to the child. It's not their fault their parent didn't reply.

#7 baddmammajamma

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:52 PM

I doubt I will ever find myself in this situation because we know all of the parents of our children's classmates, and I've been known to hunt down wayward RSVPs. I like to know my numbers!

HOWEVER, hypothetically speaking, if I had no RSVPs:

QUOTE (Therese @ 04/01/2013, 08:46 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I would never say anything to the kids, I would just make extra lolly bags. As robotsimone said I would probably say to the parent something about not getting their RSVP but I would never say anything to the child. It's not their fault their parent didn't reply.



#8 SplashingRainbows

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:55 PM

There are ways to let people know their behaviour is rude, without exhibiting rude behaviour yourself.

I think both proposed behaviours in your op are rude and I wouldn't feel comfortable doing either.  If you were truly out of party bags you could very genuinely apologise to the guests you weren't expecting by explaining that you only catered for those who replied, however I would hope I would have plenty of spares.


#9 BunnyBob

Posted 04 January 2013 - 07:57 PM

What Therese said. I'd never take it out on the kids, it's not their fault.

#10 Funwith3

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:18 PM

Id never say something to the child... but then again I'd never let it get to that point. If I haven't heard back from parents I contact them myself and establish whether or not the child is coming. If I hadn't heard anything, I think I'd make them a lolly bag just in case.

Upon their arrival id probably be a smarty and say "oh its good your child could make it, I didn't know whether or not she was coming!!" I think that would get a subtle message through!

#11 erindiv

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:24 PM

I'd be saying "Oh, I didn't get your RSVP! I hope I have enough spare things for a lolly bag. So sorry, I didn't know you were coming!"

Chances are you being so apologetic and flustered will make them feel guilty.

How are these people supposed to learn if nothing gets said? Of course have enough for extras, don't take it out on the kids, but don't just let it slide.

#12 SeaPrincess

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:29 PM

It depends how many there were.  I've read of some people potentially changing their plans due to such low numbers of RSVP attendees - in that case it's their bad luck if they turn up to the original venue and its not on.

I wouldn't make more than 5 extra goody bags.

And if there was a safety/supervision issue such as at a swimming pool and I didn't think I had enough people to adequately supervise the extras who turned up, then yes I would ask the parents to stay, but not to pay for their own child.

Edited by SeaPrincess, 05 January 2013 - 11:29 PM.


#13 allthiseffortpaidoff

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:30 PM

You're at a catered event, right?

Play centre etc... so you're budgeting...?

I would make extra loot bags, but I wouldn't be paying for anyone that hadn't RSVP'd to a 'paid' event.



#14 bailee

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:33 PM

Whenever we've been to a play centre for a party they have always had a list at the door for those that have rsvp'd. Anyone who hasn't then gets stopped and the host has to be found and asked if it's ok to add this child, etc. So the parent gets the message that their RSVP wasn't received and their child could have been turned away. I would prepare a lolly bag and accept the child but probably wouldn't add the child to list cause then you automatically get charged even if they don't turn up. Well thats how it works around here anyway, but we don't really have that many that don't RSVP.

#15 erindiv

Posted 05 January 2013 - 11:36 PM

QUOTE (bailee @ 06/01/2013, 12:33 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Whenever we've been to a play centre for a party they have always had a list at the door for those that have rsvp'd. Anyone who hasn't then gets stopped and the host has to be found and asked if it's ok to add this child, etc. So the parent gets the message that their RSVP wasn't received and their child could have been turned away. I would prepare a lolly bag and accept the child but probably wouldn't add the child to list cause then you automatically get charged even if they don't turn up. Well thats how it works around here anyway, but we don't really have that many that don't RSVP.



I'd be telling the play centre to charge people who weren't on the list  ph34r.gif

#16 JRA

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:21 PM

QUOTE (baddmammajamma @ 04/01/2013, 07:52 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I doubt I will ever find myself in this situation because we know all of the parents of our children's classmates, and I've been known to hunt down wayward RSVPs. I like to know my numbers

Yes, same here.

I must admit I am not sure if I have needed to chase anyone though

#17 Holidayromp

Posted 06 January 2013 - 09:35 PM

This is a tough one because it isn't as simple as making up an extra lolly bag because I plan to the exact amount of children.
There are only a set number of places at the table
There is only a set number of wrapping around pass the parcel
There are ony a set number of prizes in a treasure hunt.

I am sorry but I am not going to stuff around with trying to fit an extra seat in (and trying to find something that will do as a seat), trying to wrap another layer of pass the parcel, digging around for non-existant items for lolly bags when I should be entertaining the kids that I know are coming.  

Same with a play centre party or whatever - they want numbers TWO days before not on the day, not people who just show up.  This is a catered party so if you want to 'squeeze your children in ' because you have been so lazy and so rude so as not to let me know what you are doing means that there is not enough to go around and potentially children miss out on the pre-organised games.  And no I will not pay for your kids because I have budgetted x amount I have pre-paid that amount and I don't have any further money.

Luckily I have not had that happen to me and it is going to put me in a god awful position if it does because I only plan for people that RSVP - not for people who don't, not for mind changes and certainly not for any hangers on.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Tot meets his heroes, falls apart with excitement

Two-year-old Quincy finished his potty training last week, and as part of his reward he was able to meet his idols.

Beautiful in our eyes: Georgia's story

I will never deny the fact that grief has a place when you give birth to a child who brings a set of circumstances very different to what you imagined. Because for nine months, I thought I knew my Georgie.

'It's been phenomenal': widower dad of quads thankful for support

There was nothing Erica and Carlos wanted more than a baby.

Vin Diesel names daughter after actor Paul Walker

The actor said there was "no other person" he was thinking about when he chose the name.

How midwives can help women who experience domestic violence

More than half of women who live with abusive partners experience violence during pregnancy.

Mum describes giving birth during Cyclone Pam

A new mother was told she must flee Port Vila hospital with her baby as Cyclone Pam bore down.

6 signs you're done having babies

There were a few signs I'm never going back to the land of maternity jeans, breast pumps and bassinets.

Marta Dusseldorp reveals breastfeeding cost her an acting job

Australian actress Marta Dusseldorp has revealed she was forced to withdraw from a Sydney Theatre Company production because a director did not approve of her breast feeding.

Female celebs (or their babies) with traditionally male names

Looking for a name that's a little bit different for a girl? Turn to names that have been traditionally used for males, as these celebs (or their parents) did.

'If you're anti-immunisation ... take a look at this picture of my son'

Greg Hughes is "an absolute shell of a man" as he and his wife Catherine struggle to come to terms with the loss of their newborn son Riley to whooping cough.

How an extrovert can raise an introvert

Introverts are often misunderstood as shy, and sometimes even rude. A timid child can be difficult to build rapport with, but it's important we nurture their sensitive natures.

Sheryl Sandberg's advice

'Choreplay': Help out at home to get more sex, Sandberg tells men

Forget foreplay. The new and improved route to intercourse is "choreplay" - it's good for your spouse, good for your house, and comes with the imprimatur of feminist du jour Sheryl Sandberg.

How to play with your baby

The first time your child learns a new skill at playtime is very exciting - for both you and your baby! Play is important to your child's development for a variety of reasons - here are some simple ideas for you to try at home.

I'm a single mother by choice

For me, being the best mother I can be means being a mum alone, at least for now. Thinking of my friends with inadequate partners, I wonder why more people don’t choose single motherhood.

Awkward wedding photos

Weird poses, surprise photobombs, bizarre editing: these are the wedding photos that should have never seen the light of day.

Four-week-old baby Riley Hughes dies of whooping cough

The mother of a four-week-old Perth baby who died after contracting whooping cough says her family has been left devastated by the loss of her "gorgeous, sweet" son.

Win a Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom prize pack

To celebrate the April 1 release of Holly's Magic Wand on DVD and Digital, we are giving away five DVD packs featuring the newest installment of Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom Holly's Magic Wand and many more hours of family entertainment! Enter Now!

Oh boy! Video shows family's reaction to baby surprise

Little Peyton Williams thought she was getting a baby sister named Charlee. But the two-year-old has had to settle for a doll dressed in pink after her baby "sister" turned out to be a boy.

How to help build up your baby's immune system

We all know that having a strong immune system is the best way to stay healthy – but what can we do to help it along?

'Nick, you need to call an ambulance': home birth mum's tragic death

A Melbourne mum who died after the home birth of her baby pleaded with her husband to call an ambulance because she felt she was going to die, the Victorian Coroners Court has heard.

When dads believe their baby doesn't 'like' them

Q: My two-month-old baby doesn't like me. He's perfectly content with my wife, but when I try to hold him, he gets upset and cries. I've backed off a little, thinking that he just needs a little time to get used to me, but that doesn't seem to be working. I'm starting to think I'm just not a very good dad. Is it too late for me to build a relationship with my baby?

When was the last time a stranger praised your parenting?

Wouldn’t it be great to get some nice feedback every now and then? After all, everyone likes to hear positive praise, particularly when it comes to parenting.

Special Ticket Offer, Save $8!

The Essential Baby & Toddler Show is back this April! Save $8 off the door price for a limited time only!

15 names on the verge of extinction

If you're looking to revive an older name, or don’t want anything near the top 1000 list, check out these rare monikers for your unique baby.

5 characteristics of great dads

It’s great to see a generation of dads who are more actively involved with caring, nurturing and loving their kids.

Why doesn't Australia have more breast milk banks?

When there’s no question that milk banks are important, why don’t we have more of them in Australia?

Carrie Bickmore announces birth of daughter

Television personality Carrie Bickmore has given birth to her second child.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Sign up to our 30 days of #PlayIQ challenge

Sign up to receive 30 amazing tips and ideas for play with baby during the month of April and submit a picture or tip on our social wall for a chance to win an amazing Fisher-Price prize pack.

Man faces jail after giving woman abortion pill smoothie

A Norwegian man is facing jail after putting abortion pills in his ex-girlfriend's smoothie, causing her to have a miscarriage.

'He's a blessing': family of baby born without eyes

Jordy Jackson was born without eyes. He has anophthalmia, which affects one in every 100,000 babies born.

Win one of 5 Cadbury Easter Hampers

With Easter fast approaching, Cadbury are giving away 5 Cadbury Easter Hampers. Enter Now!

Super fit model Sarah Stage defends her pregnancy body

Model Sarah Stage has defended her pregnancy body after critics claimed her slim figure at eight-and-a-half months pregnant wasn't "normal".

Win a Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom and Peppa Pig prize pack

To celebrate the April 1 release of Holly's Magic Wand on DVD and Digital, Essential Baby and Entertainment One are giving away five bumper DVD packs featuring the newest installment of Ben & Holly's Little Kingdom Holly's Magic Wand and many more hours of family entertainment! Enter Now!

Why I post breastfeeding photos online

I love to take pictures of my children. In some of the pictures, my younger son is nursing.

The day I broke my baby

There are things I wish I didn't know. I wish I didn't know that companies make tiny braces, small enough to hold necks no bigger than a wrist.

The place just for dads of multiples

When a couple discovers they're expecting multiples, the dad can sometimes be almost forgotten in all the excitement and preparation. But one group offers a space just for dads of twins and higher-order multiples.

Brave mum calls for domestic violence law reform

A brave mum of two has shared details of the harrowing attacks she suffered at the hands of her partner in a bid to help other victims of domestic violence.

Why I had the new test for Down syndrome

Early last year I turned 35, and having just found out I was pregnant, I opted to have the new test for Down syndrome.

Geeky baby gear

If your family is more into Star Wars, gaming and the periodic table than most, you might want to check out these geek-chic baby items.

2015: the year of the sheep

According to the Chinese zodiac, babies born in the year of the sheep are creative and enjoy spending quiet time with their own thoughts.

Breakthrough genetic testing now available in Australia

Pregnant women will for the first time have access to locally analysed, accurate, non-invasive pre-natal genetic testing when the first Australian clinic to offer the services opens its doors next week.

Grandbabies: the babies born looking old

Not a day under 65 and a lifetime of struggle! That's the look of these newborns, who look adorably older than their real age. Social networking site Reddit recently featured user submissions of adorable grandbabies, here are our favourites.

Family kicked off flight after toddler seatbelt drama

An entire family was kicked off a Cathay Pacific flight when a misbehaving toddler refused to put his seatbelt on.

Stolen baby found after 17 years

A baby stolen from her mother's arms shortly after birth has been found through an astonishing coincidence.

53 creative pregnancy announcements

Announcing that you're expecting can be a time to express your creativity, sense of humour and imagination. Check out how other parents and parents-to-be have broken the news to friends and family.

IKEA hacks for the nursery and kids' rooms

Are you one of those that know the whole IKEA catalogue by heart? Love their stuff but want to personalise it? Here's some inspiration to help you realise the potential of IKEA furniture and fittings.

36 baby names inspired by food and drinks

A French court may have ruled out Nutella as a baby name, but that doesn't have to stop you from taking inspiration from the supermarket (or bottle shop). See what parents in the US have chosen for their delicious little ones.

Clever breastfeeding products

Check out this range of products designed to help make your breastfeeding journey more enjoyable, manageable and convenient.

 

Sign up now!

30 days of #PlayIQ challenge

Receive a daily email from Essential Baby during April with great play tips and ideas, then submit your baby at play photos to our Playwall, Instagram or Twitter for your chance to win.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.