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When did you need to stop taking/reminding them


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#1 nicknick

Posted 01 January 2013 - 07:09 PM

DS is in the middle of toilet training, one or two accidents here or there but generally getting the hang of it and actually enjoying it (he was 3 in October). I am taking him to the toilet every hour or so and rewarding with a sticker which he loves, but it is me doing the reminding and asking - he isn't telling me he needs to go yet. I have only been at it for the last 3 days so know it's early days, but just interested when you found your little one started to tell they needed to go?

#2 luke's mummu

Posted 01 January 2013 - 07:35 PM

My son's 3 and 1/2 and still doesn't ask/tell . Will just wet himself . Drives me nuts! We live in hope.....

#3 SpunkyMonkey88

Posted 01 January 2013 - 07:42 PM

My DS is 4 and he will go 70-80% off the time on his own, but if he is concentrating on something he will forget and start doing a dance, at which time I will tell him to go.

#4 Dionysus

Posted 01 January 2013 - 07:46 PM

DD is 3 and a half and generally tells me when she wants to go.

Though, she can go almost all day without peeing which drives me crazy and drives me to reminding her a fair bit.

She is sort of night-trained, but more so because she doesn't need to go very often.  Most mornings she wakes up dry, some mornings she wakes up and tells me she needs to go, once or twice she has wet the bed (and slept through it, which is what tells me she isn't night trained as such)

#5 Fright bat

Posted 01 January 2013 - 07:47 PM

There is a school of thought that you shouldn't take them every hour. Because that's not toilet training. If their bladder is never given a chance to fill up, then they'll never know when they need to go, and as soon as you stop taking them every hour, they'll have an accident. Toilet training is about building bladder/bowel capacity and the ability to 'hold on' as much as physically going in a toilet.

Personally, I sit on the fence. I do think there is a role for taking the kids often at the start, to normalize using the toilet, and to just get them comfortable with it. But at some point you also need to 'risk' the accident by not taking him so that he starts to learn what a full bladder feels like and asks to go, and then learns to hold on.

DS1 decided that he no longer wanted nappies. Two accidents later and he was fully day trained. It was another six months for night training (the key there being him bing happy to get out of bed and go to the toilet).

Perhaps choose a day to let him have a few accidents, expect them, be kind when it happens and point out the feeling right before, and that being the feeling he needs to wee. He should get it pretty quickly

#6 QueenElsa

Posted 01 January 2013 - 07:51 PM

Took DD1 2 weeks before reminders decreased. DD1 took 1 week.  After that I would remind then if engrossed in an activity or before going out. I found their bladder capacity improved over a few weeks.

#7 Beancat

Posted 01 January 2013 - 07:53 PM

About 2 1/2 but he was trained early at 20 months.  He would just ask to go or run to the toilet....or outside on the grass original.gif


#8 NinjaMum

Posted 01 January 2013 - 07:54 PM

If you're my Mum, you'll never stop reminding people to go to the toilet.

Even after I turned 30, she still occasionally suggests I need to go to the toilet before going out somewhere if we leave from her place!  laugh.gif

#9 Soontobegran

Posted 01 January 2013 - 07:57 PM

I am of the school of thought that toileting them hourly is keeping the bladder empty (if they go) and not teaching them how to hold onto their urine and release it when their bladder is full.
I know people will disagree but I learnt by my mistakes and my children who TT when they were ready and not when I thought they should be were TT's easily with few, if any accidents and in just a couple of days.
Our  5 TT'd between 19 months and 3 and a bit. The 19 month old was still peeing her pants for over a year after I thought she needed to be out of nappies. unsure.gif

#10 HIH.GD.Isolabella

Posted 01 January 2013 - 07:58 PM

Like MsN I would not be taking every hour. I will only suggest to my kids to go if I know I am going for a long drive/ will be out for hours.



#11 SeaPrincess

Posted 01 January 2013 - 07:59 PM

I still remind all 3 of mine when we are going out, especially if we don't know what the facilities are like at our destination, or when we got to a particular park with no facilities.

When they were training, it probably took a bit longer than you're hoping (6 weeks+), but mine all trained before they were 2.  The quickest was also the one who trained the earliest and was 100% day trained at 20 months.

#12 findingada

Posted 01 January 2013 - 08:32 PM

During the first week of training my 2.5 year old, I just reminded him that he had no nappy on and to visit the potty if he needed to wee or poo. In that first week, if it was more than 2 hours since he had wee-ed, then I would encourage him to go more directly. I backed off with the reminders during the second week.

My twins were day and night trained at 2 years and 2 weeks but I have a fuzzy memory that I was reminding them for quite a bit longer - possibly a month or so?  

I think it may be beneficial to back off with the reminders (try every 2 hours then every 3 hours then drop them all together).Just be attentive to any rising anxiety and be gentle with how quickly you back off. He may even go backwards for a while. I always think if they are not having accidents then they are not learning how full a bladder is too full. I think it takes quite a few accidents before they can push that "stop-what-I-am-doing-and-go-now" thought to the top of their "to-do" list.  Also be careful if he starts to not care that he has had an accident. I am not sure what helps in that case because all my boys were mildly upset when they had a wee accident (possibly because we have polished timber floors and I have always asked them to clean up water spills so no one accidentally slips over).  

I must admit though I am much like NinjaMum's mum and I still do ask the whole family (including DH) to follow the going out routine where we all  "put on our shoes, put on our hats, and do our going out wee"!

#13 Riotproof

Posted 01 January 2013 - 08:45 PM

DS never actually told me he wanted to go. I set him up by taking him every couple of hours, or when I was going, and just responded to accidents by talking about how wees and poos go in the toilet. I got him to come with me to put poo in the toilet and wash hands as well.
Then I would leave the toilet permanently set up with the step stool there and the insert ready to go, adn remind him periodically that it was ready for him. One day he just got up took his pants off and climbed up, and since then we've had barely any accidents. I don't even need to remind him before we go out if it's a short drive.

He will tell me he wants to go in a foreign environment, but at home he just toddles off and calls me to help wipe and wash hands. I do wish I could get him to be more agreeable about putting undies back on, but apparently that's a boy thing.  huh.gif

#14 No girls here

Posted 01 January 2013 - 08:49 PM

I only reminded them for a couple of days.  Other than that it was only if we were about to go out, I would make them go before we left home.

#15 liveworkplay

Posted 01 January 2013 - 08:50 PM

Are you sure he is ready to TT. What you are doing is "toilet timing", plonking him on the toilet at set intervals in the hopes that you will catch it. Kids will always need reminding sometimes (my 9 year old still does laughing2.gif) but  I knew they were ready to TT when they told me they wanted to go.

DD3 (3.5) has been out of daytime nappies for a year. She still has what we term "the wee dance" as, if she is busy or occupied she does a little jig and if you tell her to go to the toilet she says "I don't need to, I'm just dancing" laughing2.gif Soon after she will run off in a big big hurry wink.gif


#16 nicknick

Posted 01 January 2013 - 09:07 PM

Gosh like everything this is so hard.  sad.gif He is showing signs of being ready, dry in mornings, telling me he has done a wee and wanting it changed so thought that was part of him being ready. I was told for the first few days just get him into it by taking him and teaching him what you do - I do think he actually has bladder control as we had him out this afternoon and he had pull ups on and was dry. I guess I need to now test what he does when I don't ask him.

#17 erindiv

Posted 01 January 2013 - 09:09 PM

Once DD got the hang of toilet training after a week or so, she didn't need reminding.

#18 OneMore?

Posted 01 January 2013 - 09:26 PM

I would keep trying  for a few weeks, some kids get it quicker than others.

My DS2 was and still is atrocious, and he is 6.5. He holds on and on and on as he doesn't want to miss out on anything. In the early days if I didn't remind him then he would have an accident. I still have to remind him to go (no accidents these days but when he has to go - he has to go !!).



#19 blackbird

Posted 01 January 2013 - 09:40 PM

QUOTE (SpunkyMonkey88 @ 01/01/2013, 08:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
My DS is 4 and he will go 70-80% off the time on his own, but if he is concentrating on something he will forget and start doing a dance, at which time I will tell him to go.


This, I thought he was never going to get there, at 4 he just didnt care at 4 and 2 month we are getting there and he is dry at night original.gif

#20 Amber Loren's Mum

Posted 21 January 2013 - 10:00 PM

This will be my DD's 2nd week of TT (day time only though) and the first week I would remind her to keep her knickers dry and clean. I would put her on potty on getting up and she will do a wee and then from then verbally remind her about staying dry and praise her on being a big girl wearing no nappies.  If she hadnt been for 2 hours I would ask her to sit on potty, if she was to do something she does it in 5 mins I allow her to sit on the potty.  Towards the end of the week she was getting on potty doing wee's, if it were the smallest dribble on her own to get the reward but we have backed off on the reward a little but still making a fuss as we dont want her to get a UTI from going too many times just for the reward.  This week she is holding for 2-4hrs but still needs a verbal reminder.  We have had 2 wet accidents thus far - expecting more so very proud. She is doing no 2's in potty too which I feel is great as some children wont do no 2's in it straight up.
I am will do night time training once she wakes up dry for at least 3 nights straight but I think that may be another few months yet.





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