Going against Kinder/Pre school
Re Starting school
, Dec 30 2012 04:05 PM
12 replies to this topic
Posted 30 December 2012 - 04:05 PM
Another curiosity re starting children at FYO school.
Has anyone gone against a Kindergarten (VIC) Preschool (NSW)...not sure re other states...recomendation for a child to repeat Kindergarten and sent them school the next year when repeating was suggested. Especially re those children not yet 5 when they start school?
And if you did why, and have you regretted the decision or happy you made it?
Posted 30 December 2012 - 04:13 PM
I can't speak from personal experience, but I can share the experience a dear friend (late April baby).
The preschool teachers were very opposed to her son starting school at age 4+9 and strongly suggested that the parents hold him back. As the preschool was affiliated with the junior school she had selected, my friend felt very pressured to comply with their recommendations -- but she felt that would be the wrong choice for her son.
She ended up having her son assessed by a very reputable educational psychologist to give her both the "independent backing" and the confidence in her personal decision to go against the school's recommendation.
Her son is still the youngest child in his grade, but he is settling in pretty well.
Good luck with your decision.
Posted 30 December 2012 - 04:22 PM
A friend of mine was recommended to repeat 4 yr old kinder with her daughter. Sent her to school. Recommended repeat prep, moved up to grade 1. Her child ended up repeating grade 2 as each year it grew more obvious that she was behind where she should have been. It was very hard on the child at 7 to lose all her friends and have to start again
Posted 30 December 2012 - 04:26 PM
One friend sent her DS to school here in NSW at 4.5yo. The principal actually called her (having never met the child) and tried to guilt her into holding him back another year.
She sent him to school. He did brilliantly and is still ahead of his peers although he is younger.
Posted 30 December 2012 - 04:27 PM
A kinder teacher recommended my dd not to start school, but that she needed another year at kinder. She noticed a lot of differences in my child that I either didn't agree with or was unwilling to admit to.
I ignored the recommendation, her speechie thought it could go either way, and an educational psych thought she had enough school readiness that she supported my decision.
This year I came to the conclusion that the kinder teacher was correct in her opinion. Dd has cognitive issues - she is borderline intellectually impaired, but with an unusual presentation. It means she really struggles, and in hindsight I think she would have benefited from being that bit older in her fyos.
With ds I'll listen.
Posted 30 December 2012 - 04:33 PM
I went against my preschool's (4yo) recommendation to repeat DD. She would not turn 5 until late March and they believed she was not ready both socially and in certain motor skills. She underwent a professional assessment which found no issues at all with her motor skills, which is what I expected.
Essentially the preschool thought she couldn't do things because she was uncomfortable at preschool, unsure of what she was supposed to be doing, and terrified of the assistant teacher (who was in fact a very scary and unpleasant woman).
I agonised over the decision but in the end I did not repeat her. What I knew about her that preschool didn't was that she is just like me and was not going to gain passable social skills for many years. And they also couldn't fathom that she wasn't meeting their motor skills criteria because she was afraid of failure and scared of the assistant.
So off to school she went. It was a bit rocky at first, as I would expect for any anxious child. But she did just fine. And I firmly believe that she would have gained nothing at all from repeating. She was more than ready academically and the social aspects would only come with years of experience.
In short, the preschool can recommend based on what they see but they don't know your child the way you do. You should take their comments on board and use what you know to make the best decision.
I have never once regretted the decision to forgo the extra preschool year.
ETA: DD is going into year 9 this year, has loads of friends and is academically near the top of the year group.
Edited by BadCat, 30 December 2012 - 04:36 PM.
Posted 30 December 2012 - 04:53 PM
Im starting ds2 next year. He turns 5 late may. so will be very young for his year.
His daycare carers though i should wait an extra year. I had an interdependent assessment done and she told me she cant understand why ds2 couldn't go next year as he was ready in her opinion.
Only time will tell!
Posted 30 December 2012 - 05:00 PM
I am sending DS2 to school next year despite both Kingergarten and Preschool Field officer recommending he repeats. He is an August birthday so will be 5.5 yrs starting school rather then their suggested 6.5 yrs to start school.
He had speech and language issues which were from hearing loss in his early years. His social skills and confidence were affected. He came along in leaps and bounds over the pat 6m in his language. Testing in Feb put him outside average, but Nov testing put him well within average on expressive (talking) skills and high above average for receptive (understanding). Comments are always " he is very smart" due to the coping skills he did have to cover his previous deficits.
So although Kinder suggested repeat, his speech pathologist ( plus the school) believe he is more then ready to start.
Kinder say that if he repeated he would be the " leader" by virtue of his age, but tbh it is not in his personality type. I believe (as does his speechie and prep teacher for next year) that he will find the routine of school and the working in small groups at school more beneficial in making friends rather then the free play of kinder.
So I will report next year how we go.
Posted 30 December 2012 - 05:01 PM
Eta DS2 did a prep readiness course and the prep teachers who take that class also say he is more then ready for school.
Posted 30 December 2012 - 05:05 PM
Thanks for the replies thus far.
This question in particular relates to my son, 5 in April in 2013.
I agonised re the decision to send him next year or not. He even did primary school transition for 2 sessions then I decided to keep in kinder.
All I got from his kinder teacher re holding back is he asks to many questions when he should be listening?? More or less. And doesn't like to do a wide variety of tasks...well his older brother was worse and he was a yr older in Kinder due to when his b'day fell.
I think half my DS2's problems is he is bored and spoilt as he is quite a bit younger than his siblings (7 & 9yrs) and my Mum minds him a lot when I work where as she didnt when the other two were little as she was still wiorking FT.
I think it is just an age thing I am basing it on, as is his kinder teacher.
My older two went when they did as they had no choice due to when their b'days fell, but with DS2 I have a choice, and leant the other way due to the 'norm' to send 5 starting 6 nowadays not the other way around. It is like it is a must do and if you don't you are failing them pretty much...well that is the way I feel anyway.
ETA His brother went to school 5 turning 6 in the May, and I'd say DS2 at 4.8 now is above where he was then re school readiness and that is with DS1 having done so a early literacy programme 3hrs a week, daycare, and Gymbaroo and other things DS2 has never had the oportunity to do. Has known things DS1 never new yrs earlier. DD however beats them both, if she was able to be younger started I would have sent her in a heartbeat but due to birth date could not.
Edited by newphase, 30 December 2012 - 05:09 PM.
Posted 30 December 2012 - 05:10 PM
Yes. Preschool advised we hold ds back. Their reasons were not good enough for me. They related to his personality which I didn't think would change irrespective of which year he went. Ie he was never going to be leader. Age was also irrelevant, he was within the age for nsw. I wasn't going to be dictated by what every one else was doing.
Good luck with your decision. Until two weeks ago dd was going next year (5 in April) and I'm sure I bored everyone with my incessant stressing about it. If it wasn't for the way she deals with her medical condition she would still be going ( non reading and writing and against preschool).
Eta I understand the guilt others make you feel, ive experienced it with both kids,but you know your child best. It's amazing the number of people who now tell me I've made the right decision not sending dd next year....
Edited by Kemismum, 30 December 2012 - 05:14 PM.
Posted 30 December 2012 - 05:17 PM
Dd has a feb 4 birthday. I had intended on sending her to fyos when she turned 5. Preschool suggested that she would benefit from another year of preschool and send her the year she turned 6. The only problem was that she could not repeat the year at the same preschool (Preschool was dept of ed nsw attached to the local school) This was in late August that they told me. I couldn't find a suitable preschool for her locally so I sent her to fyos.
Academically she is going well but emotionally she is quite behind her peers. I wanted to repeat her but the school didn't agree. She is going into year 2 next year.
She is my third child and my youngest. I wish I had tried harder to find her a another preschool as I should have listened. Oh well, we'll see how she goes this year.
Posted 30 December 2012 - 05:29 PM
Yep. Preschool that DD#1 went to thought she should stay there another year and delay going to school. Their reasons were because she was too shy and didn't speak much. They felt she would struggle emotionally. She was an end of June baby.
We took their advice onboard but also spoke to the teachers and principal involved in the Kindergarten Orientation. We told them of our concerns the first day which then gave them 4 days to assess her during the orientation days. They felt she was fine so we sent her. Sure, she was still shy and took some coaching to speak in front of the class etc but she was fine. She will be going into Year 9 next year and is doing well.
1 user(s) are reading this topic
0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users
Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.
Desperate, out of petrol and low on food, a new mother lit a fire in the hope of attracting attention.
The story was chilling and heartbreaking: a three-year-old boy was found dead in a Southern Maryland park, his mother pushing him on the swing.
Feeling fatigued? Uh-huh, thought as much. Join the queue.
For many new dads, their own child is the first baby they have ever held. So one dad has posted an instructive YouTube video titled "How to Hold a Baby".
She may be only eight months old, but Egypt has already amassed more than 100,000 fans and received a letter from royalty - Hollywood royalty that is.
Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have invited well-wishers to see Princess Charlotte outside church in Sandringham on day of her baptism.
Tongue and lip tie can lead to many problems for babies - and their parents. Here are the signs of tongue tie and how it's treated.
My daughter may be small, but it's my job as her parent to refocus back where it belongs - on who she is as a person
The government has issued a health warning after a rise in allergic skin reactions has been linked to a preservative found in some wet wipes.
Love may have won, but it came with quite the wait.
The family of missing boy William Tyrrell will mark his fourth birthday on Friday making a cake to share with friends and family as NSW police renewed their public appeal for information on his disappearance.
A picture of Ryan Reynolds always gets the girls talking, and a recently shared photo has done exactly that - but this time, it's for all the wrong reasons.
Thinking her baby just had an unusually shaped head, a mother was shocked to discover it was instead linked to a dangerous condition.
My toddler has started hitting when he gets frustrated, is feeling ignored, or just thinks it might be fun.
Transparency, accountability and responsibilityare essential measures to protect IVF vulnerable patients.
This day marks a significant day. Today marks 10 years since I lost my son Kai.
The happily ever after Nicola Milan had imagined wasn't to be – and she blames her mother-in-law.
Choosing a name for your little bundle of joy is always a major decision. It can be something traditional, trendy, creative … or inspired by the menu of your favourite chain restaurant.
It's been a whole year since sleeping in until 10am. A whole year since having a peaceful shower.
Over a 10-year period, 83 children died from domestic violence abuse in NSW, with three quarters of the victims aged five years or under, the NSW Ombudsman has revealed.
Dr Katie Heathershaw answers questions about jumping, toe walking, riding a bike and being pigeon toed.
From the moment that I fell pregnant with my son, I realised just how much my life had already started to change.
"I was terrified I would always be this way. The pill needs to come with a much higher warning."
Unfortunately, the belief that sex should always be spontaneous is a myth. It just isn't.
When it comes to newborn photoshoots, it is all about the timing.
Former All Black Jerry Collins' critically injured orphaned daughter has awoken from her coma and is able to bottle-feed.
One American father has taken multitasking to a new level at a Cubs-Dodgers baseball game at Wrigley Field.
Having lost their firstborn at one day old, the Carrolls were overjoyed to welcome their daughter Isobel into the world a year later.
The Studio host Sarah Harris doesn't mind if her first baby is a boy or girl, but she does hope it is born with one thing in particular.
Ultrasounds give you a look at your growing baby ... and sometimes what appears to their womb-buddy, or your bub in an amusing position.
From 'morning sickness' to 'the terrible twos', there are many parenting terms that are misleading.
While most nannies take pride in their work, there can be some who have a hidden side.
Beware: skinny jeans might be bad for your health.
A number of women having caesarean deliveries are now taking steps to give their baby a better 'microbiome' start in life.
Jimmy Fallon, host of NBC's The Tonight Show, recently wrote a children's book about every father's secret wish for their baby's first word to be "dada" - not "mama".
Looking for some baby name inspiration for a bub born during the colder months? Here are 28 options from around the world to consider.
The uncle of the seven-year-old girl at the centre of the brawl at child's birthday party in Sydney's west has described the events leading up to the alarming show of violence.
More often than not, you'll read that screen time for children should be kept to a minimum - but some scientists are now challenging this way of thinking.
Natalie Reilly describes three main types of conversations mothers have. And, surprise, they're not all about kids.
A baby's smell, the noises it makes and even its gaze can contribute to the potential for a dog attack.
It was meant to be a tasteful cake to help celebrate a three-year-old's christening.
How many times have you been warned about all the sleepless nights you have to 'look forward to' when you become a parent?
A police officer arrived at a devastating scene on Thursday: a car crash resulting in all passengers being thrown from the vehicle.
Want to open the boardroom doors for women? Encourage - heck, praise - dads who stay home with their children.
Just two days after giving birth, actor Alec Balwin's wife posted a post-baby picture on social media.
Compliance is part of the parent-child relationship, but so is resistance. It's all natural.
The Baird government will include $22.8 million in Tuesday's NSW budget to expand a program designed to help parents at risk of postnatal depression (PND).
I'm really lucky to have two great kids, but I found it really tough with so much being aimed at the mothers and not the fathers.
Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.