Jump to content

Extremely disillusioned


  • Please log in to reply
18 replies to this topic

#1 tomyoda

Posted 29 December 2012 - 12:29 PM

Ok, so I am feeling a bit messed up at the moment, and need some assistance.........I was in a ten year relationship, up until mid 2012. The relationship wasn't bad, but certainly wasn't great. My partner didn't hold dear to him, any thing that I held dear to me, such as buying a home, travelling, and having more children. We obviously stayed together out of habit, until I took stock of my life, and realised that I couldn't go on like this, any longer.

My real problems started after I made the break. I was sad, but felt so liberated, knowing that I could focus on myself, and down the track, hopefully meet somebody wonderful to share my life with. One day, in August, I received an email from a US Marine, on deployment. I support troops overseas, by sending care packages, and buying random troops cups of coffee. It turns out that I had bought this Marine a cup of coffee, and he wanted to be pen pals. He told me that he was 25, and had 4 children, which was fine with me. I understand that relationships can break down, and that some people have their families young. I had my son when I was a teenager, and I empathised with the Marine, because to have 4 children so young, and to live on the opposite side of the country to them, would be so difficult. Anyway, we wrote, long, long, daily emails, full of the trivial and the not so trivial. He would make sure that I had an email to wake up to every morning, when he was flat out, he would send random messages, to say that he was thinking of me, etc. One day he sent a message from his iPhone, saying I think you are AMAZING, and another time he sent MUAH, one thousand times, when he knew I had been having a bad week:)

Our daily emails became very personal, and you have no idea how much I looked forward to them. I had niggling thoughts at the back of my mind, wondering why he stuck to emails, and didn't suggest instant messaging or Skype, but I made excuses and pushed them to the side. From time to time I would think that he is someone I have never physically met, I had seen pictures, and that was all.......he could be just a player. My family and friends would argue that he was definitely attached to me, and that a player wouldn't write the essays that he wrote daily, a player would want to instant message, and probably Skype. About a month ago, he told me his middle name....being the sticky beak I am, I Googled his name, and one page came up.....Valentines day, 2011, someone had 'bought' him a star, and that someone turned out to be his wife:(. I thought that I should give him the benefit of the doubt, and that maybe he had divorced in those 18 months.....so after a bit more Googling I found an old page, where there were pictures of him and his wife, when they were very young and having their second child, after having just gotten engaged. There were romantic notes that they had written to one another, and a note where she apologised to him for cheating on him. I felt like the biggest idiot, but I thought that if he had have been in a relationship, why would he have mentioned the fact that he had 4 children....why not hide it all? So, in my next email, I was honest with him, and asked him to be honest with me. He wrote back, and basically he apologised, and said that although it is messed up, he is glad that I am so attached to him. He said he is married, and very unhappy.

When I thought he was single, for all of those months, I couldn't believe how cynical he was, about love. He told me about all of the Marines he knows, who have been cheated on by their wives, while they are deployed, and how broken some of the men are. He mentioned a few times, how trapped he felt in his life, never elaborating, only saying that it wasn't because he had children. Then, when I saw the public notes he had written to his wife, years before, it was like it came from another person. I am not stupid, obviously his wife and he have a culture of cheating in their relationship, she lives in New York , and he is based in California, which is obviously not good on their marriage. I went easy on him, he didn't meet me on a dating site, and I know he doesn't owe me anything.....it's just that he implied so much, that he shouldn't have, and it really hurts, even now. He writes short emails once a week now, I still reply back, in a completely platonic way, because I don't think he is a bad person, just very mixed up. I am happy to be a friend to him, and have told him that I don't have to be a part of his life at all, and that he should just stop messaging me. He messaged me on Christmas day, telling me how stressed out he is, being back in the US, and that he is having a hard time adjusting. I try to be supportive, as a friend, and sometimes wish he would just de friend me on fb, and stop emailing me. I wish that I was strong enough to do it myself.

My family and friends know what he meant to me, for all of those months. They know that he is what inspired me to lose 17 kilos, to exercise every day and to stop biting my nails. They tell me that people come into your life for a reason, and that he has served his purpose in mine. I start to let go more and more, and then he writes again, usually four or five lines, and always sounding depressed. I truly want to be a friend to him, and to get out and meet other people, and I am currently doing that. I guess that people can read this, and say he is married, stay away, and I agree. I am holding onto the friendship we developed, and truly believe that he is too. I know  that I gave him a lot of support while he was deployed, when he was ill, and trying to study on top of all of his work over there...why won't he just stop writing? It is not like I flirt with him any more, now that I know he is married. What benefit is there in him even bothering with me any more, especially considering our geographical locations? So much went on between us, more then I can ever explain here. Arggh, I am so sick of thinking about this? What would you do, considering the fact that I am emotionally invested in this person? Thank you for your help original.gif

#2 ♥~Bodhichitta~♥

Posted 29 December 2012 - 12:48 PM

First of all my heart really goes out to you.  It's hard to open up to someone, and trust them with your heart.

You obviously cared about him a lot, and it hurts to know that he's not what you thought he was.

I think though that you did something amazing for him.  He was obviously lonely and mixed up, and you provided him comfort, and someone to talk to.  And he's probably really valued that, and is now feeling confused about the way he is feeling about you considering the circumstances.

I'm not sure I have any advice, but I wanted to say - please don't feel that the relationship you had was a waste of time.

You were there for each other, and gave each other happiness, even it was just for a short while.

#3 tomyoda

Posted 29 December 2012 - 01:14 PM

Thank you, Bodhichitta original.gif. I really appreciate your reply....when I read your kind words, I started crying again, lol.......but I am so glad that you can see where I am coming from. I have always been a very logical person, but a romantic at the same time, so this whole situation has really thrown me. Thanks againxxxx

#4 raven74

Posted 29 December 2012 - 01:28 PM

I am sorry you are hurting.
The fact is, he won't stop writing until you stop replying.
You need to remember, although this is so hard and bittersweet for you, that he lied.  Either by omission or blatantly - only you know how.  You invested in an emotional affair and he did not reveal his marriage.  You supported him, invested in him and still are investing in him, no matter how platonic the friendship now is.  I can see from your post how unhealthy this is for you. sad.gif
What so YOU want out of this?  Because right now, that's the important question.


#5 MooGuru

Posted 29 December 2012 - 01:29 PM

This might be crazy advice to give but it sounds like you were previously very open and honest with him, so have you considered saying to him exactly what you've written here? It's like a summary of everything you feel and maybe he'll answer the questions you're asking. What is the worst thing that can happen?

Having said that I've never been in this situation so have no idea whether I would ever follow through this advice myself but it sounds like you need clarity (enough that you've posted here) and he's the only one that can give it to you.

Good luck!

#6 tomyoda

Posted 29 December 2012 - 02:06 PM

Thank you, raven74 and MooGuru:)....Moo, I laid out my heart to him, after I found out the truth. I told him that I wasn't going to judge him too harshly, and that I understand that people can still be in a relationship, long after it has broken down. I told him that I didn't appreciate being seen as a diversion, if he was happily married, and just being a player, while away from the US. He told me that he would never treat me as just a diversion, and that he is very unhappy in his current life.

raven, he omitted the truth, and while I was hurt, I understood that he probably thought that we would email once or twice, and that would be it.....I don't believe that either of us envisioned that it would become as serious, as it did between us...there was never going to be a right time to tell me, without the risk of losing me, I guess. You are right, he won't be out of my life, unless I stop replying. I send him emails now, that are a couple of paragraphs, and nothing like the ones I used to write. In them, I am always upbeat, and share news, and funny anecdotes about my life and family, of who he is familiar with. .....it hurts that the past few weeks, he will reply roughly every 5 days, and thee past 2 weeks, he doesn't even refer to what I have written....one would think he was just being nice, and that is why I told him straight out to stop writing, if it is stressful having me write, and I will never bother him again.

I even had the 'door mat' thought that I wish I had never told him that I knew, because it changed everything.....but I couldn't have lived with that, obviously. Raven, you are correct....I insinuate that I want him out of my life, and the logical, self preservation part of my brain does.....but to be truthful, I don't really want him gone. This is really unhealthy, and I am hoping something will just click, and make me strong again....or that he will cut me off, and take the choice away....

#7 opethmum

Posted 29 December 2012 - 02:37 PM

I think you should take a big huge step back and think about what he might be doing to you. You don't really know what is going on in his life on a day to day basis and he may be telling you an almighty lie. He may be unhappy in his marriage but that is for him to sort out not you and I would be redirecting him back to his wife and kids. You both have kids and you need to put them first, you are a mother and you need to be focusing on your children and not some nutter on the other side of the world. Your children are probably hurting given your recent break up and they need stability and direction and I think by relying on this person to fix you is doing you and your children damage.
You need to stop and really grow up and realise that you probably need to be alone and focussing on providing your kids a peaceful happy life and find contentment in other things. You are doing yourself a disservice as well, if he is willing to emotionally cheat on his wife what makes you think he will ever be loyal to you.
When you are a mother you don't get a choice to gamble with your future, your future is decided in that you must do your utmost to rear your children and do the best you can with what you have.
FWIW I don't think most military wives cheat on their spouses, yes it is hard but I think that it is a lie to make his justification on cheating on his wife better in your eyes.
Your relationship is based on a lie and you don't want that surely, what person would. You know what you should do so just get on with it and move on and leave this nutter behind and just focus on being yourself and meet new people in your area and find contentment in the simple things rather that somebody who lies to you.

#8 Starrydawn

Posted 29 December 2012 - 02:46 PM

Cut all contact. I would hazard a guess everything about him is a lie. It s easy to do on the net.

I recently watched tall hot blonde about a lie fuelled internet affair and people will weave any web. Back in the late nineties early 2000 when icq was the way to chat every second person was lying.

#9 ms flib

Posted 29 December 2012 - 02:50 PM

I think he took advantage of you. He had all the power in your relationship plus a wife and 4 children!

This is part of the process of making new relationships. Sometimes things don't work out - that's OK, it's normal.

It's probably time to move on. I'd recommend you do things IRL that you love and where you can meet people. The internet is not the best place for relationships.

You sound sensitive and sensible. Let it go.

All the best!

#10 Cath42

Posted 29 December 2012 - 02:51 PM

I couldn't read this thread and not reply. I'm so sorry that things have turned out the way they have, OP. I'm assuming that you live in Australia and he is in California?

Are this man and his wife actually still together? It sounds to me as though they separated a while ago. They may be still married, but he lives in California and she lives in New York with their 4 children. I would have thought that unless there were extenuating circumstances, such as a child with special needs, a serviceman's family would move with him if he was posted across the country. Certainly, that tends to be what happens in Australia.

But even if they've separated, I guess that doesn't answer the question of where this relationship between he and you was going to go. He has 4 kids he's financially responsible for and needs to see as often as he can. Even if he and his ex-wife live on opposite sides of the US, they're still in the same country. Leaving the US is just not an option for this guy. I don't doubt for one minute that his feelings for you aren't genuine. He wouldn't have kept writing the way he did if he didn't care about you and think about a life with you. It was probably the only thing that got him through his deployment. But I suspect that now that he's back in California and dealing with the minutiae of demands of everyday life, he's realised that this relationship is a pipe dream. He's there - and he can't leave the counry his kids live in (and no doubt doesn't want to leave his kids) - and you're here, with your own family commitments. And there you both stand, ad infinitum. Sometimes in this life, we meet the person of our dreams, but the circumstances or the timing are wrong and there's nothing that can be done about it. This may well be one of those tragic situations.

I don't think he meant to hurt you, or to lie to you. I think he met someone he could bare his soul to, who he realised he cared about very deeply, and who he could never be with because of circumstances beyond the control of both of you. If you don't want him to back off, tell him not to back off. There azre still a lot of things you and he need to talk through, and even though circumstances have kept you apart there is still a lifelong friendship to be had.

#11 annasue

Posted 29 December 2012 - 02:55 PM

You don't have a relationship with a person.

You have been exchanging emails/messages with a stranger on the other side of the world.

He has lied to you. You don't even know to what extent he has lied to you.

You need to block his messages and facebook and any other access he has to you and put it all behind you.

He had no right communicating so intimately with you whilst married to another woman. What he has done says much about his character and its a character of a dishonest cheat. You deserve better.

Stop replying to him. Block him.

#12 Candyley

Posted 29 December 2012 - 03:17 PM

QUOTE (Cath42 @ 29/12/2012, 03:51 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Are this man and his wife actually still together? It sounds to me as though they separated a while ago. They may be still married, but he lives in California and she lives in New York with their 4 children. I would have thought that unless there were extenuating circumstances, such as a child with special needs, a serviceman's family would move with him if he was posted across the country. Certainly, that tends to be what happens in Australia.


I am also curious about this OP, as the wife of a US marine myself generally the wives and children move to the bases with their husbands as housing etc is provided.

I am not sure what he's intentions are/were, maybe he is a con artist, maybe he really was genuine and really does feel a connection with you too, either way from my own experience, when they are deployed they can feel very lonely emotinally and really love to vent it all out to someone who really cares and will "listen" perhaps you were that person for him if he is having marital problems.
I could get one line from my husband some days then a huge emotional essay and then some very distressed ones.  They generally really just need to know there is someone on the other end of the screen caring and showing them interest in their emails.

#13 tomyoda

Posted 29 December 2012 - 03:39 PM

Thank you for your replies.....Openthmum, I can assure you that my Son has, and always will come first. My son is extremely happy with his life, and was extremely happy when I broke up with ex. My relationship issues are mine to deal with alone, and not my child's problem. I am not sitting in my room, ignoring my life and in a deep depression. I just carry around the weight of what could have been, while getting on with my life:). Thank you for your concern though.....

ms Flib, you are totally correct re relationships on the Internet. I know what I need to do, and that is focus my energy and thoughts on positive things:). I guess that with him, I wasn't trying to create an online relationship, it just evolved into something that I never expected. Thank you original.gif.

annasue, thank you....I do agree that he did the wrong thing. I don't agree that you can't build a friendship with a person through correspondence. I have some beautiful friends in the Uk, who I started out as pen pals with, eventually met, and now keep in regular contact with. Yes, he did the wrong thing, but we are only human, and there is much of him that was genuine, I know that.

Shizella and Cath42,Thank you....all I know is that the wife and children live in New York, and he is based in California, which I find an odd situation too. It is hard to explain to people, without coming across delusional, but he was definitely genuine, in his correspondence with me. My family and friends agree with this, even though they are angry with him on my behalf. Our bond was obviously a surprise to both of us, and I knew that we had everything against us, with him being military, and living so far away from one another.....but I had the dream that could have been real, of us meeting, and who knows, lol....obviously, as things stand that is not a reality......but first and foremost we do have a friendship, and I was a support to him, when he needed me.....Cath, thank you, that is exactly how I see the situation, and I like to think that we can have an enduring friendship....I just need to get past the dreams I had, and realise that I am grateful for the friendship we formed, in strange circumstances:)

#14 Sancti-mummy

Posted 29 December 2012 - 03:51 PM

OP - I am so, so sorry that this has happened to you.

I think, for you to heal and move on, you need to stop your side of the communications - you can only control your actions, and even though you tell him not to do stuff, he is an adult and, while still getting some return on his email investment, will keep the hunt going by the sounds.

Obviously you are a very caring and giving woman - could you perhaps set 2013 to be your year to channel that care and attention to yourself, nurture and rediscover yourself and work out exactly who you are without the definitions of a long-term or long-distance relationship?

Good luck for the future.

#15 Stellajoy

Posted 29 December 2012 - 03:59 PM

You need to cut all ties so you are emotionally available to meet someone new.

Staying "friends" ( which I think is a bit delusional) will hold you back.

#16 babychacha

Posted 29 December 2012 - 09:54 PM

QUOTE (annasue @ 29/12/2012, 03:55 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
You don't have a relationship with a person.

You have been exchanging emails/messages with a stranger on the other side of the world.

He has lied to you. You don't even know to what extent he has lied to you.

You need to block his messages and facebook and any other access he has to you and put it all behind you.

He had no right communicating so intimately with you whilst married to another woman. What he has done says much about his character and its a character of a dishonest cheat. You deserve better.

Stop replying to him. Block him.


I agree.

Have you ever heard of/or seen this movie? Its based on a true story.

http://www.pushon.co.uk/blog/tall-hot-blon...ress-up-online/

And highlights the lies that are told via the net.

I'm sorry you were hurt.

#17 epl0822

Posted 29 December 2012 - 10:25 PM

You remind me of the time I gave a fake lotto ticket to my sister as a joke. She thought she won $10k - you should have seen the look on her face and the immediate list of stuff she was going to do with the money - then the crashing fall when she realised it was about as real as the fairy godmother.

You thought you found genuine affection and a potentially permanent relationship. You developed an intense emotional attachment to this man, the same as you would for a long term boyfriend. But it wasn't real.

Don't justify his behaviour by saying "he never owed you anything." People don't form intimate emotional attachments like that because they want to be friends. The long daily emails and the personal history and feelings he shared and the implied affection all said, without explicitly stating, that he was available and he wants to be with you.

But let's take a step back and analyse him for what he truly is. He. Lied. To You. Lying by omission is still a lie. To lie to you like that and allow you to fall for him, all the time knowing he was married and he was inevitably going to hurt you, is despicable. It's a filthy thing to do to someone. I know it's easy to gloss over the ugly parts - I did it too when a person I hugely trusted revealed their true character. In my case it was my best friend since childhood. I just couldln't believe the friend I loved and cared about was not the person I thought she was. It took me two years to see her for what she was.

Yup, I know it's hard to sever contact. But the longer you drag it on the more harmful it is for your mental health. You can keep pretending you can be friends with him, but eventually you're going to realise what a scumbag he was and regret wasting your time.

Relationships are not like Hollywood films. Sometimes we can have a wonderful,meaningful, significant relationships with a person and have the worst ending. It doesn't erase the impact they had on you or mean that the whole relationship was senseless. It takes awhile but the best thing you can do in this situation is to recognise that you gained a lot from this relationship, you cared for him deeply and maybe a part of you always will. But he's scum and he lied to you. He was lonely and used you.

Don't cheapen yourself by prolonging your ties with this man.

#18 Guest_bottle~rocket_*

Posted 29 December 2012 - 10:48 PM

Your post rings alarm bells OP.  Has this person asked you for money?  I agree with PPs who say to end all contact.  What evidence do you have that anything he has told you is true, or that he is who he says he is?

It reminds me of this article
http://www.theage.com.au/digital-life/cons...0717-228bi.html


#19 lilmissmars

Posted 30 December 2012 - 09:16 AM

QUOTE (tomyoda @ 29/12/2012, 01:29 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
My family and friends know what he meant to me, for all of those months. They know that he is what inspired me to lose 17 kilos, to exercise every day and to stop biting my nails. They tell me that people come into your life for a reason, and that he has served his purpose in mine.


This is what really stuck out to me in your OP.
I actually fully agree with your family. He came into your life and inspired you to better yourself. Now it's sounds like that inspiration is gone/ perhaps no longer needed and you should probably just stop contact now as it sounds like it is becoming detrimental to you on an emotional level.

That's probably not much help. But we'll done on loosing 17kgs and stopping your nail biting!




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Get your FREE Baby & Toddler Show ticket!

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

A solo birth, a wasp swarm and a forest fire: mum and baby's amazing story of survival

Desperate, out of petrol and low on food, a new mother lit a fire in the hope of attracting attention.

Boy found on swing died of hypothermia and dehydration, autopsy finds

The story was chilling and heartbreaking: a three-year-old boy was found dead in a Southern Maryland park, his mother pushing him on the swing.

Child's play and laughter help battle fatigue

Feeling fatigued? Uh-huh, thought as much. Join the queue.

Dad shares entertaining 'how to hold a baby' clip

For many new dads, their own child is the first baby they have ever held. So one dad has posted an instructive YouTube video titled "How to Hold a Baby".

The Australian baby with 100,000 Facebook fans

She may be only eight months old, but Egypt has already amassed more than 100,000 fans and received a letter from royalty - Hollywood royalty that is.

Public welcome outside church for Princess Charlotte's christening

Duke and Duchess of Cambridge have invited well-wishers to see Princess Charlotte outside church in Sandringham on day of her baptism.

Tongue tie: what you need to know

Tongue and lip tie can lead to many problems for babies - and their parents. Here are the signs of tongue tie and how it's treated.

My daughter is small but that doesn't matter

My daughter may be small, but it's my job as her parent to refocus back where it belongs - on who she is as a person

Wet wipes linked to rise in allergic reactions

The government has issued a health warning after a rise in allergic skin reactions has been linked to a preservative found in some wet wipes.

Gay couple in their 80s first to wed in Dallas after Supreme Court ruling

Love may have won, but it came with quite the wait.

William Tyrrell's family marks birthday with cake and renewed appeal

The family of missing boy William Tyrrell will mark his fourth birthday on Friday making a cake to share with friends and family as NSW police renewed their public appeal for information on his disappearance.

What all parents should know about safe babywearing

A picture of Ryan Reynolds always gets the girls talking, and a recently shared photo has done exactly that - but this time, it's for all the wrong reasons.

Baby's head shape reveals potentially fatal condition

Thinking her baby just had an unusually shaped head, a mother was shocked to discover it was instead linked to a dangerous condition.

'Help - my toddler hits me!'

My toddler has started hitting when he gets frustrated, is feeling ignored, or just thinks it might be fun.

Why IVF success rates may not be what you think

Transparency, accountability and responsibilityare essential measures to protect IVF vulnerable patients.

On the 10th anniversary of my son's death

This day marks a significant day. Today marks 10 years since I lost my son Kai.

Mother-in-law 'from hell' inspires survival guide

The happily ever after Nicola Milan had imagined wasn't to be – and she blames her mother-in-law.

Name your baby Quinoa, win a $10K gift card

Choosing a name for your little bundle of joy is always a major decision. It can be something traditional, trendy, creative … or inspired by the menu of your favourite chain restaurant.

Owning a pair of nail scissors does not make me a hairdresser

It's been a whole year since sleeping in until 10am. A whole year since having a peaceful shower.

The 83 children who were tragically let down in the last decade

Over a 10-year period, 83 children died from domestic violence abuse in NSW, with three quarters of the victims aged five years or under, the NSW Ombudsman has revealed.

Expert Q&A: Gross motor skill development in toddlers and preschoolers

Dr Katie Heathershaw answers questions about jumping, toe walking, riding a bike and being pigeon toed.

Is it reasonable to expect your partner to give up drinking in pregnancy?

From the moment that I fell pregnant with my son, I realised just how much my life had already started to change.

Stroke victim joins class action against makers of popular contraceptive pill

"I was terrified I would always be this way. The pill needs to come with a much higher warning."

Sexy time

Why you should get excited about scheduling sex

Unfortunately, the belief that sex should always be spontaneous is a myth. It just isn't.

When newborn photoshoots get messy

When it comes to newborn photoshoots, it is all about the timing.

Orphaned baby daughter Ayla wakes from coma

Former All Black Jerry Collins' critically injured orphaned daughter has awoken from her coma and is able to bottle-feed.

Dad takes miraculous catch while feeding baby

One American father has taken multitasking to a new level at a Cubs-Dodgers baseball game at Wrigley Field.

'Samuel is our firstborn, and he will never be forgotten'

Having lost their firstborn at one day old, the Carrolls were overjoyed to welcome their daughter Isobel into the world a year later.

Channel 10's Sarah Harris expecting first child

The Studio host Sarah Harris doesn't mind if her first baby is a boy or girl, but she does hope it is born with one thing in particular.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

27 funny ultrasound pictures

Ultrasounds give you a look at your growing baby ... and sometimes what appears to their womb-buddy, or your bub in an amusing position.

The top 6 misleading parenting terms

From 'morning sickness' to 'the terrible twos', there are many parenting terms that are misleading.

When 'good' nannies go bad

While most nannies take pride in their work, there can be some who have a hidden side.

Woman hospitalised for skinny jeans injury

Beware: skinny jeans might be bad for your health.

Gauze seeding: the bacteria-breeding birth trend

A number of women having caesarean deliveries are now taking steps to give their baby a better 'microbiome' start in life.

Jimmy Fallon writes new children's book for dads

Jimmy Fallon, host of NBC's The Tonight Show, recently wrote a children's book about every father's secret wish for their baby's first word to be "dada" - not "mama".

28 names for babies born in winter

Looking for some baby name inspiration for a bub born during the colder months? Here are 28 options from around the world to consider.

The horrible act that sparked a brawl at child's birthday party

The uncle of the seven-year-old girl at the centre of the brawl at child's birthday party in Sydney's west has described the events leading up to the alarming show of violence.

Babies 'benefit from iPads at a young age': study

More often than not, you'll read that screen time for children should be kept to a minimum - but some scientists are now challenging this way of thinking.

Do mums really just obsessively talk about their children?

Natalie Reilly describes three main types of conversations mothers have. And, surprise, they're not all about kids.

Why some dogs might attack babies or young kids

A baby's smell, the noises it makes and even its gaze can contribute to the potential for a dog attack.

Mum demands refund for 'beargina' christening cake

It was meant to be a tasteful cake to help celebrate a three-year-old's christening.

5 things no one warns you about after giving birth

How many times have you been warned about all the sleepless nights you have to 'look forward to' when you become a parent?

Police officer sang nursery rhyme as heartbreaking photo was taken

A police officer arrived at a devastating scene on Thursday: a car crash resulting in all passengers being thrown from the vehicle.

Don't worry, working mums: Just leave Dad in charge at home

Want to open the boardroom doors for women? Encourage - heck, praise - dads who stay home with their children.

Hilaria Baldwin shares post-baby selfie

Just two days after giving birth, actor Alec Balwin's wife posted a post-baby picture on social media.

'Help - my child won't ever do what I ask!'

Compliance is part of the parent-child relationship, but so is resistance. It's all natural.

Postnatal depression support gets $23 million boost in NSW

The Baird government will include $22.8 million in Tuesday's NSW budget to expand a program designed to help parents at risk of postnatal depression (PND).

'I'm just as tired, scared and stressed as you': stay-at-home dad's plea

I'm really lucky to have two great kids, but I found it really tough with so much being aimed at the mothers and not the fathers.

 

FREE TICKET

Get your FREE ticket to the Baby & Toddler Show

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.