Jump to content

Anyone else had fights in their family today?


  • Please log in to reply
44 replies to this topic

#1 I*Love*Christmas

Posted 25 December 2012 - 04:53 PM

My parents seperated in August this year after 27 years of marriage. It is long and complicated and obvious my Dad does not want to get back together. It appears my Mum has always hated him but she is the one not letting go.

ANYWAY... Christmas build up has been tense about what was happening but Mum decides to organise something at Dads house (well technically their house but Dad is the only one that lives there) for myself, my 2 brothers and my sister and our families to celebrate Christmas. There were a few arguments between Mum and Dad all week and I was dreading a fight in front of the kids on the day but hoped for the best. Ideally we would have all preferred to do something seperately.

Christmas lunch starts at 11. Mum gets there at 1045. DH, I and kids arrive 1050 and Mum has already flipped out hugely at Dad and left. I ring her and she is sobbing and at the cemetry visiting her deceased brother, sister and parents. Says Dad is seeing another woman etc etc. Refuses to come back. My siblings and I don't know what to do as she is the one that has bought all presents and prepared all food and feel mean doing it without her.

Ds, 4 then asks if we can just go home.  

Anyone elses family have any fights today?

#2 JustBeige

Posted 25 December 2012 - 05:04 PM

Argh, you poor thing and your poor mum too.  less than 6mths apart after 27years together is a huge thing to try and get over.

Love your DS's comment though.  Out of the mouths of babes or what?



Ours wasnt too bad actually.   We only had one moment when FIL said something archaic and dumb regarding driving in torrential rain on motorways/freeways and both DH and BIL double teamed him.  It was kinda awesome actually.

#3 eigne

Posted 25 December 2012 - 05:04 PM

It was yesterday. Someone spent a good 15 minutes letting rip at me over a years worth of perceived slights and imagined insults. I did not deserve it...
Argh.

#4 Sweetpea11

Posted 25 December 2012 - 05:35 PM

QUOTE (JustBeige @ 25/12/2012, 06:04 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Ours wasnt too bad actually.   We only had one moment when FIL said something archaic and dumb regarding driving in torrential rain on motorways/freeways and both DH and BIL double teamed him.  It was kinda awesome actually.


Now I'm curious as to what your FIL said!!

#5 frizzle

Posted 25 December 2012 - 05:38 PM

Nope not this year. After the attack on me last year by my drunk brother on christmas night we didn't have christmas with my family. I was called every name under the sun, it was an awful day. Still feel sad a year on.

#6 MrsLexiK

Posted 25 December 2012 - 06:10 PM

Well my uncle told my mum he wouldn't speak to her all next year because she won't let him go to their holiday house because he is a drunk. He later told my aunt he wore the shirt he did for her benefit "f*** off I have enough friends" that ended things with her for the year as well.

#7 bek_p

Posted 25 December 2012 - 06:20 PM

My bil complained that we asked for 10 pp to cover the food last night. We also asked that no one feed the dog as his been sick with 3 days in the icu and is only allowed bland food he threw food around the yard over the Fence and drank more then 10 worth of dh's beam then bagged out the food saying its not as good as what we have when it's at other bil house when there exact the same everyone dislikes this bil who also can't hold his booze

#8 JustBeige

Posted 25 December 2012 - 06:31 PM

QUOTE (Sweetpea11 @ 25/12/2012, 06:35 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Now I'm curious as to what your FIL said!!

lets see.

He has some pearlers.

Todays was "Yes but if it is raining, it doesnt matter if you are travelling in the fast lane, you should just drive to your ability. you shouldnt have to move over into the slow lane just because other lunatics (people who drive to the speed limit) want to go past you "    

Both DH and BIL are frequent freeway drivers so proceeded to lay into him about the actual road rules and subsequent fines.

He's old(ish) and sometimes I suspect he blurts out these pearlers just to rile people up.    I dont think he was expecting the tongue lashing he got though. lol, he picked the wrong day for it as it is horrendous weather in sydney today

#9 Rosiebird

Posted 25 December 2012 - 07:56 PM

I was told by my MIL that I work too much and spend too much time with my friends and not enough time with (read: looking after) my husband. Well, given that he is a SAHD, my working is kind of important isn't it? It was rather a tense day.

#10 Lyn29

Posted 25 December 2012 - 07:57 PM

.

Edited by bye, 29 March 2013 - 03:04 PM.


#11 Mitis angelam

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:08 PM

Notably, my mother's comments about how unreasonable it is that no one considers research into curing homosexuality a priority did not start an argument.  

I think my restraint was positively steely.

#12 cesca

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:12 PM

We had a big family lunch today, with family coming from overseas and all over.  

My mum started complaining weeks ago that she wished that we'd cook the lunch (we always offer, she always refuses) so we took over the lunch prep. She then spent all day complaining about how she couldn't get in the kitchen, loudly saying how awful the food was sure to be and that no-one would ever eat it, and loudly insulted my touchy SIL (the SIL is never coming back, ever, as far as she's concerned) by turning her nose up at the bunch of flowers and chocs she was given.

She then waited and WAITED and WAITED until everyone else had their plates served up, and there was plenty of food left.  Just before people started coming for seconds we quickly said "Mum, get your plate dished up!" but she huffed off saying she wasn't hungry. She then kept an eye on things, and the minute all the roast potatoes and lamb had been eaten she made a huge fuss about how she did all the work and there was now no food left for her.  

She flounced off, started smashing the dishes in the kitchen in a half hearted attempt to wash them. Myself and two SILs took over the dishes, (didn't need any more than 3 people in the kitchen), and so she then goes on about how the other SIL (the one who brought the flowers) is such a lazy so-and-so as she wasn't helping.  She kept turning off the music, yelling at the kids to get out of her bloody way, and she refused to let us do the dishes in peace, she kept going through all the drawers and cupboards loudly complaining that we weren't putting things in the right places.

We all eventually slunk away, very angry and upset with her, and she's now complaining that no-one thanked her for all her hard work and that no-one said goodbye.

I am actually really livid.  My day turned into crap thanks to my mum matyring herself and doing her best to make everyone have a miserable time.  Lots of lessons learnt for next time, that's for sure.

Edited to add that DH also decided to be an idiot as well, telling me that the reason I don't have a job yet is that I don't want it enough.  It's all my own fault.  This just tops off yesterday when he told me that the money he earns is his and his only.

Edited by cesca, 25 December 2012 - 08:15 PM.


#13 Feral Grey Mare

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:12 PM

Sister and DH had a disagreement about which way blood flows through the body and DH , dad and Sister had a minor difference of opinion over whether to cook turkey breast side down or up.

#14 littleboysmum

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:20 PM

Cesca, how difficult. Hope you're having a much more relaxing evening.

#15 Ducky*Fuzz

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:28 PM

AngeVert, maybe your mum needs to start looking at a cure for idiocy instead wink.gif

#16 JRA

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:30 PM

Oh people, I am sorry you all had such a rough time.

OP I can't imagine how hard it would be for your parents to be together for christmas after a recent separation. Seems a tough call to expect.

Rosiebird: How can someone even think that.

Cesca: I am sorry it was so horrible

#17 FeralFerretOfDoom

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:32 PM

QUOTE (Ange Vert @ 25/12/2012, 09:08 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Notably, my mother's comments about how unreasonable it is that no one considers research into curing homosexuality a priority did not start an argument.  

I think my restraint was positively steely.


Wow - well done Ange!

Sorry to everyone else who had crappy stuff happen today. My family is far from perfect, but we usually manage things like Christmas well - we had a good day today, if a bit sad because it was the first Christmas without my stepfather, who passed away in October.

#18 Coffeegirl

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:33 PM

For the first time in our 20 odd year marriage, there were no arguments with DH's family.and no one stormed out.  

I attribute this to a couple things.

1). DH invited one his workmates and his wife for lunch ( they have only been in Sydney for 8 mths and on their own this year) so his family was on their best behaviour.
2).  I sat at the kid's table and did not hear the disgusting comments that FIL made abiout Germans (our guests were German) and only heard about them after they had left
3). MIL and I are not actually 'speaking'. I am civil to her and only discuss the basics
4) BIL did not drink more than a 1/2 glass of champers and a single beer.



So to all.  A Merry Christmas!   It can happen original.gif

cesca - your mum sounds like my MIL.  I called her out publicly on her behaviour earlier this year and things are better, but mainly because we are not talking.



#19 *cough*

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:43 PM

...

Edited by *cough*, 26 December 2012 - 10:58 AM.


#20 Mousky

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:45 PM

My sister decided to attack everything that I have in my birth plan, including not wanting to deliver lying on my back, so I gave her a piece of my mind.

Note- my plan has nothing unusual in it, just things like wanting to use the bath if available, my preferred order of pain releif and wanting an active birth if I can handle the pain.

#21 3hearts

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:51 PM

We hosted DH's family for Christmas last Saturday.  I was pleasantly surprised at how well the day was going until dessert time when SIL asked me across the table if I regretted not stopping at 3 children.  My DH's 90 year old grandmother have her a serve on my behalf.  I love her. wub.gif

#22 Lady Excentrique

Posted 25 December 2012 - 08:58 PM

Religious warfare. Almost started WW3. Was great!

#23 *Finn*

Posted 25 December 2012 - 09:01 PM

Well it wasn't an argument but only because I bit my tounge. But my father who visits once a year from another country spent ten min telling everyone how naughty my DS was at his birthday party on Sunday. DS who is turning 3 was extremely excited to see his friends at his pool party and had a few energetic moments where he needed to be reminded to be careful of his friends. According to my father - DS was a right little Sh#t.
He has noooooo idea.

Edited by *Finn*, 25 December 2012 - 09:03 PM.


#24 Anonemy

Posted 25 December 2012 - 09:12 PM




I am so sorry you had a bad day - i hope tomorrow is a much better day and that your mum regrets her behaviour and says sorry.

Edited by luibee, 27 December 2012 - 09:24 PM.


#25 FiveAus

Posted 25 December 2012 - 09:17 PM

Ours was calm and peaceful, but all these posts remind me exactly of why I haven't spoken to my mother in over 12 years and have stiffened my resolve to keep it that way.

The first Christmas my husband was in my life, she spent the better part of Christmas Eve telling him loudly how awful all the Americans she'd met were. He's American.

Another time she caused my sister and I to drop our jaws when she proclaimed to all and sundry that the reason black Africans live in grass huts is that they're not as intelligent as white people. (Where was the ABC and "Go Back To Where You Came From" then? She would have been a prime candidate!)

One year she dragged up some long forgotten comment from the past, twisted it and used it against my sister, who was visiting us in Vic from FNQ, and insulted her so badly she got on the next plane and went home.

Just a few of the pearls I can remember. Always after guzzling a couple of glasses of cask wine. In my mothers world this stuff rivals Veuve Cliquot for quality.

I don't miss those days at all.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Tell us what you think

to WIN 1 of 2 $500 Coles/Myer gift cards

Dealing with a toddler's morning tantrums

Your schedule is not important to your two-year-old, and you cannot convince her otherwise. So what can you do?

Child in suitcase 'could have died eight years ago'

A child whose remains were dumped in a suitcase in the South Australian bush is believed to have been a girl aged between two-and-a-half to four.

MP breastfeeds baby during parliamentary session

An Argentinian mum and politician has caused a stir on social media after being filmed breastfeeding her baby.

My baby's first seizure

It was 1am on a cold winter's night when I woke suddenly to the screams of my 12-month-old son. Our lives were about to change forever.

Portable pools 'more dangerous than permanent ones'

Inflatable and portable children's pools may be required to be sold with compulsory fencing to prevent backyard drownings, with some experts even floating the idea of a ban.

Heartbreaking moment mum kisses her one-week-old goodbye

At 11.07am on April 2 this year, Sarah Marriott welcomed baby Sebastian into the world.

The amazing Tee Pee bed and kid-friendly Frankie Bunk bed

These kids' beds definitely fit the brief of providing personality and personal space for little people who are moving up in the world.

The funny things kids say when you're pregnant

Since becoming noticeably pregnant, my son has taken more of an interest in the sibling he'll soon have.

The real problem with having one child

In this age of political correctness, it seems the one subject still subject to discrimination is that of the Only Child.

Six-week-old baby found dead, believed stabbed

A neighbour heard a child screaming before a baby was found dead, believed to have been stabbed, in a house in Newcastle.

The fire hazard in more than 70,000 Australian homes

So far, 206 Samsung washing machines have caught fire and some have exploded. But many remain in people's homes.

How having a baby can bring on OCD

We all know that having a baby can turn your life upside down - and it can also bring a raft of new anxieties and worries.

IVF gender selection being considered for Australian parents

Couples using IVF may be able to choose the gender of their babies and women could be financially compensated for donating their eggs.

The best age to get married (according to the latest study)

Not too young, and not too old. That's reportedly the best age to get married. Not everyone agrees.

Yes, you can get pregnant before your period returns post-baby

After giving birth, the last thing you want to think about is contraception. But you can get pregnant before your period comes back.

Fellow diner rewards mum after toddler's tantrum

Parents of toddlers everywhere know the feeling. After working up the courage to take your child out for lunch or dinner in public you are rewarded with a mid-meal meltdown. 

IKEA begins massive safety campaign after two toddler deaths

Two children were killed when pieces from their Malm furniture line tipped over.

Beaneasy: sweet nursery furniture with a twist

If you're looking to introduce an organic element into your baby's nursery but want to step away from natural timber, we have the perfect alternative.

A dad's guide to hyperemesis

I am in no way qualified to advise women on how to cope with hyperemesis, but I've learnt some lessons that might be worth sharing with other partners.

Woman adopts best friend's four daughters after cancer tragedy

Best friends share everything - and for these two life-long friends, that includes family.

Baby Leo's mum excluded from $500K trust 'for her own protection'

Samuel Forrest didn't want his wife as a trustee of their baby Leo's half million dollar trust for her own "protection", it has emerged.

Confirmed: men gain weight when they become dads

Men who become fathers experience weight gain and an increase in body mass index, a measurement of body fat based on height and weight, according to a new, large-scale study

Carer investigated over washing machine photo posted 'for a laugh'

She said the photo of a boy with Down syndrome in a washing machine was taken just for fun, but no one else was laughing.

Mum's premature labour nightmare after high tea salmonella outbreak

An opulent high tea at a luxury Melbourne hotel has left 44 people with salmonella poisoning - including a pregnant woman, who went into early labour.

The day my son started a fire

Would you know what to do in a fire emergency? How safe is your home and family?

Prince George celebrates second birthday

Prince George's second birthday has been marked by the release of an official picture showing the toddler smiling as he is held by his proud beaming father.

Which beauty treatments are safe in pregnancy?

Is it safe to use fake tan, hair dye and nail varnish during pregnancy?

The five ways I know my 'baby' is no longer a baby

The truth is, I can no longer deny that my walking, babbling, somewhat-independent little miss is no longer a bona fide 'baby'.

Review: Cybex Platinum PRIAM pram

I'm not usually one who believes in love at first sight but that's exactly what happened when I first saw the Cybex PRIAM.

Get your FREE Baby & Toddler Show ticket!

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Tell us what you think

to WIN 1 of 2 $500 Coles/Myer gift cards

Why I'm choosing to be a single mother right from the start

I believe that you get out of families what you put into them, and I will give mine my all.

Mother and baby units are a necessity for mental health, not a luxury

I have had two postnatal psychotic episodes. The first when my eldest child was six weeks old, and another after my second child was born.

30 French baby names

French names are always in fashion, but a few have risen in popularity in recent years.

New mum's Spanish maternity nightmare

A British woman who gave birth in Spain has told of her ordeal after spending weeks trying to convince medics the baby girl was hers.

Preparing Rover to be a good dog with baby

Some friends of ours say that it's dangerous to have a dog around a newborn and that we should start looking for a new home for him. Is it?

Company offers to ship working mums' breast milk home

First Apple and Facebook announced they would pay $20,000 towards the cost of their female employees freezing their eggs, now IBM in the US has come up with an innovative new policy aimed at retaining female employees.

Prince William speaks of his pride at wife Kate and 'little joy of heaven' Charlotte

The Duke of Cambridge opened up about family life and his plans for the future in an interview to mark his first day as an air ambulance pilot.

'Glowing' eye saves baby Mason's life

A simple photo taken in front of an evening fire gave new mother Sarah Bowers the power to save her baby's life. 

Parenting and decision overload

Of all the advice people told me before having a baby, no one warned me about the amount of decisions involved.

Proof that toddlers can't be left unsupervised - ever

Parents of toddlers all know the moment when realise your child is being suspiciously quiet. It can only mean one thing - trouble!

Meet Jeremy Ryan, The Voice contestant with seven kids

If you have trouble recalling the ages of Jeremy Ryan's seven children on The Voice, you're not alone. So does he.

Baby's adorable reaction to wearing glasses for the first time

Getting glasses can be a formative moment in a person's life.

Police officer buys supplies for family after mum of six caught shoplifting

When a mum of six was caught shoplifting nappies, clothes and shoes for her kids, the last thing she expected was for a stranger to pay for her haul.

Why pregnant women on antidepressants shouldn’t panic about birth defect claims

The risk of having uncontrolled depression is far greater than the small increased risk of birth defects that may be associated with specific antidepressants.

Arrests made over children's birthday party brawl

Police have raided properties and arrested a number of people over a brawl at a child's birthday party at a play centre in Sydney's west.

Family shares awesome drone baby announcement

Looking for a creative way to share some big news? Look to the skies, like this family did.

Young warrior Owen defies doctors' predictions

Little Owen DiCandilo's name means "young warrior", and it's a description that perfectly fits the inspiring 18-month-old

Advice for dads: when to approach your wife for sex

The exhaustion that comes with caring for young children often means romance between parents becomes a thing of the past.

I might be fat, but I don't need saving

I've been fat for pretty much most of life, besides a few crazy moments of being less-fat, but for the most part I've existed on this earth with a little more meat on my bones than desirable.

The rookie mistakes we make as parents

Since the dawn of civilisation, generation after generation of new parents have had to rely on instinct, trial and error - and sometimes get it wrong.

 

FREE TICKET

See Pinky McKay live in Sydney

Get your free ticket to The Essential Baby & Toddler Show and save $20 - register online now!

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.