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Are women better liars than men * sort of fluff*


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#1 Becky Thatcher

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:01 PM

Just because I love to be flamed, biggrin.gif

Last night I was watching "Would I Lie to You?" a British comedy quiz show, very good too, (and I realise I have a nerd crush on David Mitchell.)
The women contestants seem to be much better liars than men.

WDYT?

This is fluff, I don't care for surveys etc, just what is your general observation?


BTW, I am VERY good at that show from an audience point of view. I am in a job where I get lied to all the time. I am also very good at picking up Trolls on EB, hehe

EFS

Edited by LindsayMK, 16 December 2012 - 06:05 PM.


#2 ~Supernova~

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:04 PM

Hmm I don't think it's a gender thing. I'm an excellent liar (probably shouldn't admit to that LOL). DH is pretty convincing, but there are ALWAYS tell tale signs...if you know what to look for.

I think *some* women are more naive, as opposed to men being better liars.

#3 vanessa71

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:11 PM

I also don't think it's a gender thing, it's more of a personality thing. Some people are just very good at lying, they are believble because they believe in the lie.

George Costanza once said, 'it's not a lie, if you believe it', I think he's right.  wink.gif

#4 Chief Pancake Make

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:12 PM

DH is a terrible liar.  It has taken 3 years to teach him how to keep a surprise a secret.  He wasn't even able to take me out to dinner without accidentally telling me where it was.   I swore him to secrecy about the sex of our DD during the pregnancy.  We had a friend staying who at the end of the visit said to me - you realise he called the baby "her" at least 3 times every day.

#5 ubermum

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:18 PM

I don't think there is any gender basis to that skill. It is a learned behaviour and something you get better at with practise. People with a good memory and some knowledge of how to control their own body language are the better liars.

#6 LynnyP

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:27 PM

No.  I don't think so at all.  I base this on con artists, politicians, marketers, business people, etc.  Lying is not gender specific.


#7 andyk

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:29 PM

I thought I was pretty good at lying until I met my ex. He could have been the world champion of lying because he could spin you such a story with so many elements of truth thrown in that it was shocking to find out they were lies.

So no, for me so far males have been the best liars, but I also agree that I don't think it's gender specific.

Edited by andyk, 16 December 2012 - 06:31 PM.


#8 FrogIsAFrogIsAFrog

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:38 PM

QUOTE
I am in a job where I get lied to all the time.


So am I. IME, it's more about the frequency and depth of the lies. I find females lying more than males, but males owning up quickly when challenged. Females will string out bs until the cows come home. So I guess, for me, neither are better or worse at 'getting away with it' but the boys will certainly front up sooner, lol!

(I work with particular groups of adolescents, so my experience is a little biased!)

#9 Great Dame

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:42 PM

IME, women have more experience in it.  They tend to lie about the small stuff - "you're hair looks great!" "NOOOO you're bum doesn't look big!"  "I'd LOVE to help you move/look after your kids/give you money" - where men tend to be honest about that sort of crap.

So yes, I do think they are better liars due to regular practise.

#10 TenOfSwords

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:44 PM

I don't believe any gender is better at it than the other. I think it also depends on how big the lie is, and how frequent the lies are.

#11 TenOfSwords

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:46 PM

QUOTE (Madame Catty @ 16/12/2012, 04:42 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
IME, women have more experience in it.  They tend to lie about the small stuff - "you're hair looks great!" "NOOOO you're bum doesn't look big!"  "I'd LOVE to help you move/look after your kids/give you money" - where men tend to be honest about that sort of crap.

So yes, I do think they are better liars due to regular practise.

I was going to say similar. Women seem to lie about the small things that men couldn't give a rats bum about. Men seem to do it to hide things that they have done wrong.

#12 agnodice

Posted 16 December 2012 - 06:55 PM

I think men are far worse.

Women lie about little things, but the men I know who lie, lie about the big things.

So men not only don't have the grace to be polite about little things that make the world a slightlier happier place ("don't worry, your hair looks FABULOUS, and no you don't look like you've been up all night with the baby!), they also lie smoothly about the big important stuff ("no I did not have sexual relations with that woman").

#13 ♥~Bodhichitta~♥

Posted 16 December 2012 - 07:00 PM

QUOTE (RunawayPrincess @ 16/12/2012, 06:46 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I was going to say similar. Women seem to lie about the small things that men couldn't give a rats bum about. Men seem to do it to hide things that they have done wrong.


I would have to agree with this.

I heard once that the best lies are based on the truth, and I think that's very accurate!  The few times I have told white lies in the past  ph34r.gif

#14 Frazzled Cat

Posted 16 December 2012 - 07:16 PM

I am a FAR better liar than my husband.  Always have been.

I used to be terrible in my teens, but have conquered the tendency to flush/go white while telling a whopper.  Makes it MUCH easier.

#15 llg

Posted 16 December 2012 - 07:35 PM

This thread seems to have been re-awakened so I will continue it by giving my opinion.

I think overall girls/women are better liars than men because they have to teach themselves to be from an early age.. no  stay with me on this.


In many families girls are treated differently than boys and from my observations even in today's enlightened times girls are given a lot less freedom than boys.   Thus to get that freedom they need to learn to lie.    A boy goes out with an older girl i.e 12 with a 15 year old and for many families that is fine, but if a girl does it... No way .. So she lies.

Girls are also taught to be always nice and not brash.   Don't want the girl to blow her own trumpet while boys can beat their chests about how well they are.    So not only to girls learn to lie they also learn to get their own back in a sneaky underhanded way.   If Johnny is rotten to Tommy Tommy will just yell at him.  If Cindy is rotten to Alice,  Alice is not allowed to yell so Alice gets Cindy back by being sneaky,.


Boys don't need to lie to be able to run their lives normally.  Girls do.

#16 choccy2

Posted 16 December 2012 - 07:39 PM

Don't know but my ex was an very convincing liar and kept it up for a long time - I think he even managed to convince himself most of the time.  lol



#17 BetteBoop

Posted 16 December 2012 - 08:12 PM

I've read that women are better at reading non verbals than men. Maybe they're better at lying because they know the non verbals of lying and how to avoid them.

DH is a shocking liar. DD who is 5, can spot when he's fibbing. She says "you've got tricking eyes daddy".

I'm a far better liar than he is. Most people can't tell when I'm lying.

I don't like about the little things. If someone's hair looks awful, I won't say anything unless asked. And then if asked, I'm honest but diplomatic. I would say "you know, I probably liked it better before".

But I think there's some truth to the idea that women are better liars. Apparently they're less likely to be caught out at cheating too.

#18 No girls here

Posted 16 December 2012 - 08:25 PM

I would have thought it's more personality.  DH is a much better liar than I am.  I don't have a poker face at all, I show my emotions really clearly.  I only have boys but DS1 can't lie (his personality is much more like mine) and DS2 does not look guilty at all.

#19 IsolaBella

Posted 16 December 2012 - 08:32 PM

I don't bother telling lies as I am terrible at it. My folks and DHcan spot an untruth from me a mile off.


#20 Jane Jetson

Posted 16 December 2012 - 08:42 PM

I wouldn't have thought so, but if they are, it'll be out of socialisation, not hardwired to the double-X chromosome.

#21 PatG

Posted 17 December 2012 - 08:24 AM

Maybe it depends on how you come across to others?  Are women more likely to be viewed as sweet and innocent and therefore viewed as less likely to lie and therefore "better" liars?

Perhaps women are better at lying to men, and men better at lying to women?

#22 countrymel

Posted 17 December 2012 - 08:42 AM

I think as PP said that females are better at reading non verbal communication.

I also think that when men are telling a lie they can become quite aggressive in defending it - so while they think they are 'getting away with it' what has really happened is that people have just taken a step back - they now either continue to know the man is a liar or they just think he is a rude, nasty, a-hole!

I too have to deal with lies in my field of work - I was surprised the other day when another student took me quietly aside to 'tell me' that her fellow had been spinning me a line.... my level of 'smile nod and mentally mark as bullplop' is obviously so honed now that I looked like a genuine sucker lapping it all up...  she had been concerned that I had been believing him...

I don't have the energy or the care level to point out peoples obvious lying anymore.

#23 Cherubs

Posted 17 December 2012 - 09:12 AM

Dh and I were just having a laugh at this, we have a very honest relationship because we both suck at lying LOL, Dh adds far too many details and I feel so guilty I tell the truth in 2secs flat.  I remember I broke something of mum's, I told dad not to tell her until I replaced it, threatening to never speak to him again if he told as she drove into the driveway, she walked in, instead of saying hello, I said 'Oh mum I broke your ...... I am so sorry I will replace it tomorrow.' with dad phml in the back ground, turns out if was so old she didn't care LOL.

I am also very good at picking lies in others, I can not stand to be lied too, and call them on it. I am not judgy either so unless they have done something unforgivable, I don't care anyway!

#24 pencil

Posted 17 December 2012 - 10:42 AM

I think women are often more patient than men, and you need to be patient to lie successfully. There's no point telling a lie and then desperately asking the person if they believe you! You need to wait and hope the lie holds.




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