Jump to content

I want to buy my 5 and 4 year old a cell phone


  • Please log in to reply
37 replies to this topic

#1 blackbird

Posted 12 December 2012 - 08:30 PM

My two boys will be with their dad for 2 weeks over xmas and I am very worried about this as they have never been away from me for so long so I am thinking of getting them a cheap phone that they can call me on if they want to as I know their dad wont offer this and rarely has ever let me talk to them through his phone.

Do you think this is a good idea?

Do you know what phone might be suitable?

#2 Monroe

Posted 12 December 2012 - 08:33 PM

My first reaction was no way! But after reading your story, yes I would get them a cheap phone for them to use.
I personally would go to Optus and see their prepaid mobiles, they have Nokias with a keypad for around $70. Get them $30 credit which has a lot of calls included & they should be set.
I'm almost 100% sure you'd be able to put credit on it online if you needed to.

#3 *Lib*

Posted 12 December 2012 - 08:36 PM

$29 prepaid at bigw.

#4 wildflowers

Posted 12 December 2012 - 08:43 PM

You can get cheap prepaid phones.  I think you would need to try and set some rules thatnthey can ring you each night.  My brother gave my niece a phone cause he is separated and she rings him at any time during the day or night which I think is crazy cause I know she would miss him but it isnt an emergency to ring at 11pm.

#5 bakesgirls

Posted 12 December 2012 - 08:51 PM

Can I ask what you are worried about? I know 2 weeks is a long time if you haven't had to do it before, but what do you think is going to happen? Could you discuss calling them with your ex before they go?

I just think 4 and 5 is very young, and can imagine the phone getting lost or broken which means you would be unable to call them on it anyway.

Edited by bakesgirls, 12 December 2012 - 08:52 PM.


#6 libbylu

Posted 12 December 2012 - 08:54 PM

Why can't you tell your ex that you will call at say 7pm each night and expect to be able to talk to them then.
That's what my friend does when his son is at his ex's place.
I don't think that's unreasonable.
Who knows what a five year old would do with a mobile. accidentally call a random number while in his pocket and run the credit down in one go, probably.  I think it's too young to use it responsibly.

#7 Feral Madam Mim

Posted 12 December 2012 - 09:03 PM

I wouldn't bother, if he wont let them call you with his phone he will probably just take the mobile off them. I would just tell him that you will be calling at x time each day to say goodnight.

#8 blackbird

Posted 12 December 2012 - 09:47 PM

QUOTE (Cadie @ 12/12/2012, 10:10 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I think if I was your ex i'd feel offended. I think its rude and disrespectful. tbh. Its the kids dad. Let him have the kids in peace without them having to be checked in on every day.

Thats coming from someone who doesnt know your personal situation though.

I think a better approach may be to organise to have them call you or vice versa every 3 or so days. Otherwise it may come across as you trying to pry the kids for information on your ex and what everyone has been up to. Its sounds intrusive.

Again this is coming from someone who has seen what its like on the other side. My scenario may have nothing to do with the situation you are in.

original.gif



Personally I don't give a rats what he is doing or anyone else he knows for that matter, what I care about is the kids not feeling I have abandoned them, I have had a big struggle just getting them to happily go to his house for the two nights every fortnight that he has them, this arrangement is only recent of the last few month, directly before that he did not see them or talk to them for about 6-8 weeks (I have it written some where). I am actually a little happier that I suspect his female friend is more serious than he has said, she is a nurse and by having another person around he might be more tolerant of them and they might have more fun, but this last weekend was the 1st that my youngest didn't have an argument about not wanting to go, my oldest is autistic and his dad has very little respect or patience for his 'quirks'. I'm just worried as this is a man who pinned up a 3 year old against a wall and bellowed at him because his little brother cried and daddy assumed it was because of the oldest, hitting said 3 year old so hard I had to comfort screaming child with an ice pack and the neighbor called because she could hear it all and was worried, he wasn't purposefully abusive, he just was too rough and didn't think 1st, I'm pretty confident he isn't quite that bad now but smack 1st is still his policy for everything. Sorry, that wasn't meant to be a vent. I just thought it might make the kids feel more secure if they know they can call, their dad liked the idea when I suggest he call the kids on their own phone but nothing ever come of it.

#9 mumofsky

Posted 12 December 2012 - 09:50 PM

Stay strong OP. And if a phone makes you feel safer, get them one. It's hard being a separated parent when your ex is a crap parent.

#10 watching the clock

Posted 12 December 2012 - 10:01 PM

Have a look if you can get them a Firefly phone it's specially made for kids



http://www.smh.com.au/digital-life/iphone/...00102-lmj1.html

Edited by sweetcookies, 12 December 2012 - 10:17 PM.


#11 *LucyE*

Posted 12 December 2012 - 10:02 PM

If I were to do it, I'd look for a phone that I could 'lock' which would limit the amount of dial-able numbers. I'd set all my contact numbers and maybe one other person. Put them on an easy speed dial and just teach the kids to do that rather than memorizing numbers or functions. It also eliminates accidental dialing of random numbers.



#12 libbylu

Posted 12 December 2012 - 10:04 PM

QUOTE (Cadie @ 12/12/2012, 10:10 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I think if I was your ex i'd feel offended. I think its rude and disrespectful. tbh. Its the kids dad. Let him have the kids in peace without them having to be checked in on every day.


What's wrong with speaking to your kids every day?
We are not separated, but when I went to Bali for 10 days last year I called DH each evening briefly and spoke to DS when he felt like it otherwise I sent him kisses thru daddy - he was 5, and I think it's nice when your kids are that young to be in touch daily.
My friend separated from his wife 6 months ago and he calls his 2 year old son every night during the week at the exact same time - he sees him each weekend.  
Probably not necessary as they get older, but when they are little I imagine it would be comforting for the child.

#13 belbelchic

Posted 12 December 2012 - 10:04 PM

is this violence occuring on a regular basis, i would be reporting him.

you cant do that to a child seriously thats terrible, first its a slip up, then whats the next excuse,?

#14 laridae

Posted 12 December 2012 - 10:10 PM

I've seen (in the past) mobile phones for kids that only let them dial 4 preset numbers.  That might be an option OP.  And then just get a prepaid sim.

#15 HarperLeeAndMe

Posted 12 December 2012 - 10:22 PM

I really feel unless you are a separated parent you really don't get it!  I would definately get the phone.  



#16 blackbird

Posted 12 December 2012 - 10:24 PM

Thanks for that info, I will look into more tomorrow but it bed time for me now original.gif

And as for the aggressive behavior, since the separation any time 'he' spends with the boys he does seem to make more of an effort to control himself, that and his mother only see's them when he has them so they spend at least one of the two days supervised as such and I think that has helped too, he isn't around them having to deal with them 24/7 so its doesn't seem so bad for him now I guess, I think they will be ok but 2 weeks sounds like such a long time, I will miss them and I have mixed feelings, is it good thing s a bad thing that he wants them this long.. ah having a mummy moment

#17 Queen Yoda

Posted 13 December 2012 - 03:42 AM

QUOTE (mad madam mim @ 12/12/2012, 09:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I wouldn't bother, if he wont let them call you with his phone he will probably just take the mobile off them. I would just tell him that you will be calling at x time each day to say goodnight.

I had the same thought.  Are the kids old enough to keep track of their mobile phone itself?  If not, your ex will be the one with phone responsibility.  And if he's not into spontaneous "let's call Mummy and keep her sane" now, then I suspect that won't change.  Maybe I'm a cynic.

QUOTE (*LucyE* @ 12/12/2012, 10:02 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
If I were to do it, I'd look for a phone that I could 'lock' which would limit the amount of dial-able numbers. I'd set all my contact numbers and maybe one other person. Put them on an easy speed dial and just teach the kids to do that rather than memorizing numbers or functions. It also eliminates accidental dialing of random numbers.

If you are going to do it, this sounds great.  No way would I give my 5yo an unlimited unlocked mobile phone.  Her "exploration" might cost me a fortune!

OP, given your story, I can definitely see your reasoning behind doing this and I'd probably do the same. And I think this would work well if your kids were older (say 9 and 7). But there is no way a 3yo is going to keep track of their mobile so that they can simply call you whenever they want.  For that matterm I have doubts about a 5yo as well.  You'd have to rely on your ex to keep on top of this, make sure they do ring regularly and ensure the phone(s) aren't lost.  If you think he would do this, go for it.  If you have doubts, I'd be trying to think of other strategies that are less onerous.

#18 epl0822

Posted 13 December 2012 - 07:28 AM

It sounds like you're set on buying a cellphone. Why are you looking for affirmation from other people on this?

#19 babychacha

Posted 13 December 2012 - 07:45 AM

QUOTE (epl0822 @ 13/12/2012, 08:28 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It sounds like you're set on buying a cellphone. Why are you looking for affirmation from other people on this?


SERIOUSLY? What is the point of your post?  To be nasty?  Congrats.


OP - hopefully you can get to the stage with our ex, where he will have no problem with your boys calling and vice versa.

For the recored, my XH skypes almost every night and when he takes my DS, I ring every day.



#20 I'msoMerry

Posted 13 December 2012 - 07:47 AM

I just wanted to give you a bit of support from another mum that hates being separated from my kids.
There are all types of parents and some wont understand how you feel.
I couldnt imagine being away from my kids for that length of time at that age.
My youngest that still goes every 2nd weekend is 15 and has been going for over ten years. The eldest doesnt go any more. I still miss him terribly when he goes.
Some parents enjoy the break from their kids but I never have.
Do what you have to do. It is going to be very hard for you and them.

#21 FeralRebelWClaws

Posted 13 December 2012 - 08:10 AM

If you feel that they can look after it and use it without help then you should do it.

I think it's sad their Dad wouldn't let them ring you or you ring them sad.gif

We call DSDs are least twice a week when they are at their Mums, it's always certain days around the same time. Their Mum will text DF to let him know if they happen to be out and we arrange a new time. When we have DSDs they will call their Mum a couple of times a week.

#22 mumto3princesses

Posted 13 December 2012 - 08:12 AM

I would just do a cheap prepaid phone. Something really basic so it wont matter if it gets lost and prepaid so there is no chance of them going on the internet or anything and costing a fortune or draining the credit. Try and teach them to go into the phonebook and ring that way rather than ring your number. I would see what prepaid options there are with whoever you are with because sometimes you can get free calls or something.

We don't have a home phone and just have a spare mobile that we leave at home just in case. Sometimes my DD#2 & DD#3 sneak the phone to ring daddy to find out when he will be home or ring me if they are home with daddy. But because they don't actually know anyones phone number they can only ring the numbers in the phonebook.

#23 Lightning_bug

Posted 13 December 2012 - 08:30 AM

OP, I don't think what you're wanting is too unreasonable however I don't know that a 5 and 4 year old would be capable of maintaining a phone.

Calling and using, sure.  But remembering to charge and maintain probably not.

Just tell your ex you'll call at a certain time to talk to the kids.  Do try an perhaps make it not EVERY night. Say every night the first three days, then every second or so on.  To build the kid's confidence.

If he gives you guff... send the cops around to do a safety check.

Edited by Lightning_bug, 13 December 2012 - 08:35 AM.


#24 MadamDivine

Posted 13 December 2012 - 08:36 AM

My kids have a mobile phone for when they go to their dads.

He complains he is always broke and his phone bill is too high to ring me so I brought the phone. Problem solved. I pay for all credit and they can ring me when ever they please. I dont ring them when they are only there for two nights but I will ring them when they are there for a week.

Something his mother gets all picky and tells them they can not use the phone to ring me in her time, this will be addressed at mediation and with my lawyers. I would never ever restrict the kids from having contact with them so I expect the same in return. My kids are young and the phone lets them know they are free to contact either parent at any time. They rarely use it.. LOL more so the first weekend they had it as it was a novelty but its there.

#25 WaitForIt

Posted 13 December 2012 - 09:43 AM

I can't believe anyone has issues with a parent wanting to speak to their kids every day... Or, for that matter, kids wanting to speak to their parents.





1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Tell us what you think

to WIN 1 of 2 $500 Coles/Myer gift cards

Dealing with a toddler's morning tantrums

Your schedule is not important to your two-year-old, and you cannot convince her otherwise. So what can you do?

Child in suitcase 'could have died eight years ago'

A child whose remains were dumped in a suitcase in the South Australian bush is believed to have been a girl aged between two-and-a-half to four.

MP breastfeeds baby during parliamentary session

An Argentinian mum and politician has caused a stir on social media after being filmed breastfeeding her baby.

My baby's first seizure

It was 1am on a cold winter's night when I woke suddenly to the screams of my 12-month-old son. Our lives were about to change forever.

Portable pools 'more dangerous than permanent ones'

Inflatable and portable children's pools may be required to be sold with compulsory fencing to prevent backyard drownings, with some experts even floating the idea of a ban.

Heartbreaking moment mum kisses her one-week-old goodbye

At 11.07am on April 2 this year, Sarah Marriott welcomed baby Sebastian into the world.

The amazing Tee Pee bed and kid-friendly Frankie Bunk bed

These kids' beds definitely fit the brief of providing personality and personal space for little people who are moving up in the world.

The funny things kids say when you're pregnant

Since becoming noticeably pregnant, my son has taken more of an interest in the sibling he'll soon have.

The real problem with having one child

In this age of political correctness, it seems the one subject still subject to discrimination is that of the Only Child.

Six-week-old baby found dead, believed stabbed

A neighbour heard a child screaming before a baby was found dead, believed to have been stabbed, in a house in Newcastle.

The fire hazard in more than 70,000 Australian homes

So far, 206 Samsung washing machines have caught fire and some have exploded. But many remain in people's homes.

How having a baby can bring on OCD

We all know that having a baby can turn your life upside down - and it can also bring a raft of new anxieties and worries.

IVF gender selection being considered for Australian parents

Couples using IVF may be able to choose the gender of their babies and women could be financially compensated for donating their eggs.

The best age to get married (according to the latest study)

Not too young, and not too old. That's reportedly the best age to get married. Not everyone agrees.

Yes, you can get pregnant before your period returns post-baby

After giving birth, the last thing you want to think about is contraception. But you can get pregnant before your period comes back.

Fellow diner rewards mum after toddler's tantrum

Parents of toddlers everywhere know the feeling. After working up the courage to take your child out for lunch or dinner in public you are rewarded with a mid-meal meltdown. 

IKEA begins massive safety campaign after two toddler deaths

Two children were killed when pieces from their Malm furniture line tipped over.

Beaneasy: sweet nursery furniture with a twist

If you're looking to introduce an organic element into your baby's nursery but want to step away from natural timber, we have the perfect alternative.

A dad's guide to hyperemesis

I am in no way qualified to advise women on how to cope with hyperemesis, but I've learnt some lessons that might be worth sharing with other partners.

Woman adopts best friend's four daughters after cancer tragedy

Best friends share everything - and for these two life-long friends, that includes family.

Baby Leo's mum excluded from $500K trust 'for her own protection'

Samuel Forrest didn't want his wife as a trustee of their baby Leo's half million dollar trust for her own "protection", it has emerged.

Confirmed: men gain weight when they become dads

Men who become fathers experience weight gain and an increase in body mass index, a measurement of body fat based on height and weight, according to a new, large-scale study

Carer investigated over washing machine photo posted 'for a laugh'

She said the photo of a boy with Down syndrome in a washing machine was taken just for fun, but no one else was laughing.

Mum's premature labour nightmare after high tea salmonella outbreak

An opulent high tea at a luxury Melbourne hotel has left 44 people with salmonella poisoning - including a pregnant woman, who went into early labour.

The day my son started a fire

Would you know what to do in a fire emergency? How safe is your home and family?

Prince George celebrates second birthday

Prince George's second birthday has been marked by the release of an official picture showing the toddler smiling as he is held by his proud beaming father.

Which beauty treatments are safe in pregnancy?

Is it safe to use fake tan, hair dye and nail varnish during pregnancy?

The five ways I know my 'baby' is no longer a baby

The truth is, I can no longer deny that my walking, babbling, somewhat-independent little miss is no longer a bona fide 'baby'.

Review: Cybex Platinum PRIAM pram

I'm not usually one who believes in love at first sight but that's exactly what happened when I first saw the Cybex PRIAM.

Get your FREE Baby & Toddler Show ticket!

Get your free ticket to the Sydney Essential Baby & Toddler Show for September 25-27 - register online now.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Tell us what you think

to WIN 1 of 2 $500 Coles/Myer gift cards

Why I'm choosing to be a single mother right from the start

I believe that you get out of families what you put into them, and I will give mine my all.

Mother and baby units are a necessity for mental health, not a luxury

I have had two postnatal psychotic episodes. The first when my eldest child was six weeks old, and another after my second child was born.

30 French baby names

French names are always in fashion, but a few have risen in popularity in recent years.

New mum's Spanish maternity nightmare

A British woman who gave birth in Spain has told of her ordeal after spending weeks trying to convince medics the baby girl was hers.

Preparing Rover to be a good dog with baby

Some friends of ours say that it's dangerous to have a dog around a newborn and that we should start looking for a new home for him. Is it?

Company offers to ship working mums' breast milk home

First Apple and Facebook announced they would pay $20,000 towards the cost of their female employees freezing their eggs, now IBM in the US has come up with an innovative new policy aimed at retaining female employees.

Prince William speaks of his pride at wife Kate and 'little joy of heaven' Charlotte

The Duke of Cambridge opened up about family life and his plans for the future in an interview to mark his first day as an air ambulance pilot.

'Glowing' eye saves baby Mason's life

A simple photo taken in front of an evening fire gave new mother Sarah Bowers the power to save her baby's life. 

Parenting and decision overload

Of all the advice people told me before having a baby, no one warned me about the amount of decisions involved.

Proof that toddlers can't be left unsupervised - ever

Parents of toddlers all know the moment when realise your child is being suspiciously quiet. It can only mean one thing - trouble!

Meet Jeremy Ryan, The Voice contestant with seven kids

If you have trouble recalling the ages of Jeremy Ryan's seven children on The Voice, you're not alone. So does he.

Baby's adorable reaction to wearing glasses for the first time

Getting glasses can be a formative moment in a person's life.

Police officer buys supplies for family after mum of six caught shoplifting

When a mum of six was caught shoplifting nappies, clothes and shoes for her kids, the last thing she expected was for a stranger to pay for her haul.

Why pregnant women on antidepressants shouldn’t panic about birth defect claims

The risk of having uncontrolled depression is far greater than the small increased risk of birth defects that may be associated with specific antidepressants.

Arrests made over children's birthday party brawl

Police have raided properties and arrested a number of people over a brawl at a child's birthday party at a play centre in Sydney's west.

Family shares awesome drone baby announcement

Looking for a creative way to share some big news? Look to the skies, like this family did.

Young warrior Owen defies doctors' predictions

Little Owen DiCandilo's name means "young warrior", and it's a description that perfectly fits the inspiring 18-month-old

Advice for dads: when to approach your wife for sex

The exhaustion that comes with caring for young children often means romance between parents becomes a thing of the past.

I might be fat, but I don't need saving

I've been fat for pretty much most of life, besides a few crazy moments of being less-fat, but for the most part I've existed on this earth with a little more meat on my bones than desirable.

The rookie mistakes we make as parents

Since the dawn of civilisation, generation after generation of new parents have had to rely on instinct, trial and error - and sometimes get it wrong.

 

FREE TICKET

See Pinky McKay live in Sydney

Get your free ticket to The Essential Baby & Toddler Show and save $20 - register online now!

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.