Jump to content

How to make it up to my child
After losing it this morning


  • Please log in to reply
12 replies to this topic

#1 scjoh

Posted 11 December 2012 - 12:30 PM

Hi everyone

I am finding the end of year really stressful emotionally and financially. I have barely been getting any sleep and am feeling on edge. This morning my child broke something very important and I lost the plot. I screamed so loudly and said some very horrible things. I feel so terrible. Once I calmed down I apologised and gave my LO a big hug and cuddle.  I still feel so bad that I did that and I want to know how I can put things right

TIA

#2 Libster

Posted 11 December 2012 - 12:34 PM

I think the fact that you apologised and gave her a hug would be enough, we all lose our cool sometimes.

#3 Therese

Posted 11 December 2012 - 12:35 PM

I think that acknowledging that you were wrong to yell like that and that you are sorry is the most important way of making it right.

Be gentle to yourself too, this time of year is really tough on lots of people.

#4 rainycat

Posted 11 December 2012 - 12:36 PM

Don't hang it on yourself.  
You are human, i think many of us have cracked and had a yell at least once.
You apologised so move forward and try not to let the guilt take over.

#5 babatjie

Posted 11 December 2012 - 12:37 PM

I would just say sorry, explain sometimes adults are really worried about other things and then they get upset easily. Say sorry and that you love them. Just let them be until they feel happy to come back to you. Don't force your affection on them. Kids forgive and forget.

#6 boopyscreet

Posted 11 December 2012 - 12:41 PM

I saw a counsellor earlier in the year (diagnosed with PND) after yelling at DD1 a lot. The counsellor told me that the important thing when you lose the plot with kids is the repair. So as long as you spend more time on the kisses and cuddles and tell them you are sorry then the yelling is not the thing that they will remember.

Hope that helps. xx

#7 premmie

Posted 11 December 2012 - 12:42 PM

I could have written your post today. Ds ripped up my 30th birthday card from Dh, hand made with photos of the family inside. I told him three times to be gentle....and then totally lost the plot. We have apologies and big kisses and cuddles. Not much more we cand o really, still I feel terrible because heis in daycare today and really it should have been put in a place he could reach...

#8 tle

Posted 11 December 2012 - 12:46 PM

I agree with others. It's important for kids to see adults make mistakes too so that they can learn how to react themselves when they do the same thing. They need to know it's OK not to be perfect and you'll love them anyway - just like they will still love you even though you made a mistake.

#9 crankybee

Posted 11 December 2012 - 01:31 PM

I always say sorry when it's my fault. And I acknowledge what I'm sorry for - I'm sorry I yelled at you, I'm sorry I was so angry. I really think it is so important and that's all they want, a cuddle and an apology.

#10 JJ

Posted 11 December 2012 - 01:54 PM

QUOTE (boopyscreet @ 11/12/2012, 11:41 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I saw a counsellor earlier in the year (diagnosed with PND) after yelling at DD1 a lot. The counsellor told me that the important thing when you lose the plot with kids is the repair. So as long as you spend more time on the kisses and cuddles and tell them you are sorry then the yelling is not the thing that they will remember.


This - and also, once apologies have been made, move on. Tomorrow is a new day - don't keep talking about it. I'm not suggesting that you would, but I've found with my kids that it's important not to keep reminding them of the incident, even though you may still feel guilty for a while.

#11 d&s

Posted 11 December 2012 - 03:32 PM

I lost it last week and apologised with a hug but Miss 5 said she would have been put in the naughty spot so why wasn't I. I took it as a very fair point that we all follow the same rules in the house and (gratefully) went and sat in the naughty spot. Unfortunately not the same rules apply and I didn't get 30+ minutes of peace and quiet...

#12 peking homunculus

Posted 11 December 2012 - 03:36 PM

Not sure how old your child is but the book Harriet Harris by Mem Fox is perfect for this situation.

#13 epl0822

Posted 11 December 2012 - 04:00 PM

My dad lost his temper in a bad way a few times when I was growing up. It was not a frequent occurrence but it did hurt me a lot when it happened. But as I grew older and understood why (incredibly stressful job, scars from his own childhood etc) I came to forgive and empathise. My dad is not a perfect man but this is one flaw and he has so many wonderful qualities about him that make him a brilliant father. As an adult I can honestly say his losing his temper a few times during my childhood has no bearing on my relationship with him. I hope you are kind to yourself and realise you will make mistakes - but thankfully children are resilient and tend to bounce back from the occasional error, even grave ones, of a loving parent. You apologised and that's a wonderful example to your child of how you can admit and take ownership of your mistake. That is what your kids will remember of you later on.




0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Exclusive Black Friday Sale!

Get over 40% off selected products, including prams, baby carriers, cloth nappies, sleeping bags and much more! 24 hours only, on May 6 - register now for your special code.

Kelly Clarkson shares first photos of son

Kelly Clarkson has shown off the first photos of her son, Remington Alexander Blackstock.

5 childbirth myths that need to be busted

Birth is an unpredictable, mysterious process that intrigues us all, and there is a lot of misinformation out there.

Mum of three fatally shot by toddler while driving

A US mother has been shot by her toddler while driving on a highway in Wisconsin.

All you need is one minute to work out

The seven-minute-work out is old news. Research shows the effectiveness of going hell-for-leather for just one minute.

Pregnant women needed to join diabetes study

Pregnant woman in country Australia will help Adelaide researchers figure out why cases of type 1 diabetes have doubled over the past two decades.

Just announced: the Mountain Buggy Unirider

It's the perfect solution to combat those toddler meltdowns when they no longer want to be in a pram but can't walk long distances.

Authorities euthanise dog that fatally bit a newborn baby

A pit bull mix that fatally bit a 3-day-old infant last week has been euthanised, authorities said.

The push for Medicare to fund lactation consultants

While meeting with a lactation consultant can make an enormous difference to a new mother, it's not a service that is available through the public health system.

Why it's perfectly natural to dislike other people's children

Members of a popular forum are fiercely debating whether it is acceptable to dislike a friend's child.

Woman gives birth on plane, names baby after airline

A pregnant woman who unexpectedly gave birth on a flight has named her new baby after the airline, Jetstar.

Heartwarming photos show the joy of adoption after foster care

Children living in foster care can feel like their future is less than clear. But that uncertainty disappears the day they are adopted by their "forever family" 

'Oh my god, it's a baby!' Mum shocked to give birth

When the cramps started to kick in, Klara Dollan just assumed a painful period was starting.

Mum's Facebook plea: 'Help me find my daughter's father'

Kerryn has a unusual present planned for daughter Imi's 13th birthday celebrations - she hopes to be able to be able to give the soon-to-be the teenager her first ever photo of her dad.

Is it possible for your house to be too clean?

Our houses are cleaner than ever before. But how clean is too clean? Could a sterile home be putting your family's health at risk?

Millions of Monkeys: puzzles that grow with your toddler

Here's a puzzle that grows with them; the Puzzle Grow Pack by Millions of Monkeys.

Baby names from Britpop

If you grew up in the 90s you might want to look to the genre of Britpop music for baby name inspiration.

What to eat and drink when you have gastro

When you catch a bug that causes acute infectious gastroenteritis (gastro), your stomach and intestinal tract become inflamed, causing diarrhoea, nausea, vomiting, abdominal cramping and pain. The last thing you probably feel like doing is eating.

'To this day, I owe her my life'

Would I have survived if I hadn't crossed that street?

Why baby Sonny needs you to vaccinate your children

Caitlin is a firm believer in the importance of immunisation to protect children from harmful and deadly diseases.

Five-year-old's photo captures beauty of motherhood

There is no make-up or special outfits and hairdos, but the five-year-old boy who took this picture captured the essence of motherhood as well as any professional photographer.

Babies know whether you are naughty or nice

Studies have shown that infants in the first months of life try to avoid dealing with social wrongdoers - for example, sharing less with them and helping them less - and they expect others to, too.

 
Advertisement
 

Top 5 Articles

Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

The babies who are one in 70 million

Bethani Webb was excited to find out she was pregnant, but the first time mum did not realise she was carrying four babies not one.

Exclusive Black Friday Sale!

Get over 40% off selected products, including prams, baby carriers, cloth nappies, sleeping bags and much more! 24 hours only, on May 6 - register now for your special code.

Cafe offers breastfeeding mums a free cup of tea

A Sydney cafe is offering breastfeeding mums free cups of tea in a bid to show support for the right of women to nurse their babies wherever they choose.

To snip or not to snip? When the decision is not clear cut

Jamie Oliver, who considered a vasectomy, is to be a father again. A fellow dad reflects on his own decision 11 years ago

Doctors stunned by rare twins born almost six weeks apart

To everyone's surprise, Kristen Miller "kept doing better each day", keeping her second baby safe.

Baby book ideas for modern parents

Before my son was born I was given a lovely baby book full of blank pages waiting to be filled with weights and heights and first words.

The adorable smile of a baby seeing his mum clearly for the first time

There is no doubt seeing their child smile for the first time is an unforgettable moment for parents everywhere.

Mum tells how toddler 'nearly hung himself' in cot mishap

When Alison Johnson put her 18-month-old Caleb down for a nap, she had no reason to believe her son was in any danger.

Babies are still switched at birth? Yes, it can happen

All my panic and tears aside, my biggest question looking back is about the kind of security measures used in the maternity ward.

Doctors slammed for taking selfie with newborn

Everyone who visits a mum in hospital in the days following childbirth wants to get a photo with the new baby.

ergoPouch Twosie Sleepsuit for winter breastfeeding

Finally, there's a way to keep warm while breastfeeding through winter.

Health check: How long does sex 'normally' last?

What to do with this information? My advice would be to try not to think about it during the throes of passion.

When breastfeeding sucks: fixing common problems

From niplash to tight boobs, biting to milk supply issues, Pinky McKay looks at common breastfeeding issues and how to solve them.

10 things I've learnt in my first six months with twins

Six months on we're all still alive, and the more we get to know each other the easier the days become.

Mum's loving kiss leaves baby fighting for life

Kirsty Carrington thought nothing of giving her newborn son a kiss, little did she know it would leave the baby fighting for life.

When doing chores is your new 'me time'

After children, 'me time' looks a little different.

Get going: 14 travel strollers for families on the move

A stroller can make or break travelling with a baby or toddler. Here are 15 great single travel stroller options.

10 ways toddlers are terrific

It always pays to remind yourself of how terrific toddlers can be - they're little like this for such a short time

 

ENTER NOW

Do your kids love bananas?

This is the comp for you! We have $800 worth of Myer gift cards and boxes of Australian Bananas to be won. Entry is simple: just post a pic of your little one enjoying a banana in the comments of the FB post to enter.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.