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Being intimate after baby
Pain after tearing.


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#1 axiomae

Posted 11 December 2012 - 07:51 AM

DD is almost 6 months old. During that time, DP and I have been intimate once. And it hurt! I had a second degree tear, which doesn't give me any pain normally, but I swear that's all I could feel. I expected it to be a bit uncomfortable, but I didn't expect the pain to be so concentrated on the site of the tear, because it healed quite well considering.

Just wondering how long it was before sex was pleasurable again for you if you tore? I'm hesitant to try again but I know that's probably the best thing to do, because I miss being intimate, am missing the closeness to DP when everything has been all baby for so long. Any advice?

#2 Jenferal

Posted 11 December 2012 - 07:58 AM

Are you breastfeeding? that can lower your natural lubrication, which will increase uncomfortable friction.
I think you can get estrogen cream (or use lube) which can help.
It took months for me to relax and be comfortable enough for sex.
How long ago did you try? If it was a few months you might be ok now.

#3 Katie_bella

Posted 11 December 2012 - 08:07 AM

It does take a while, I think we first tried at about 8 weeks, then not again until about 16 weeks!

As PP said, lube will be your best friend for a while, especially if you are BF'ing. Make sure you use lots of foreplay, try different positions, especially ones that you can control speed and depth rather than him, and take it slow. (I found "missionary" quite uncomfortable for a while, it felt like he was pushing down and along where the scar was.....ouch cry1.gif )

It does get better.....

#4 José

Posted 11 December 2012 - 08:14 AM

I had stitches so have some scarring. My obs said sex is going to be uncomfortable for a while. He sais use plenty of lubricant. Did u have stitches? My obs also recommended I massage the area. He said if I do this everyday for a few weeks it may soften

#5 axiomae

Posted 11 December 2012 - 05:10 PM

Thanks - I did have stitches, so its a bit messy down there :/  I guess we'll definitely have to experiment a bit more!

#6 WinterIsComing

Posted 11 December 2012 - 05:17 PM

Can still hurt after ceasar, it's to do with the lack of lubrication but most importantly, the lack of desire. My GP told me it's mostly a psychological issue, preoccupation with the child leaves very little space for erotic thoughts towards you partner, lower desire/libido results in less cushioning of the vagina, and so it hurts. She recommended a regular babysitter!  biggrin.gif




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