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Rewarding hard work..


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#1 3'sACharm

Posted 10 December 2012 - 04:18 PM

So DS got his report card back today and i'm thrilled with it and would like to reward him for all the hard work he did throughout the year but can't think of anything...what would you reward a 6 year old??

#2 twinboys

Posted 10 December 2012 - 04:25 PM

Isn't your praise enough of a reward for a 6 year old?

Or you could buy him a book of his choice to keep the reading up.

#3 kidwrangler

Posted 10 December 2012 - 04:32 PM

Reward him with your attention - he can choose his favourite meal for dinner / choose somewhere for you to go out to eat together, play a favourite game, make a special cake together, go somewhere fun together (bowling, movie, museum) etc.

#4 applepie83

Posted 10 December 2012 - 05:50 PM

QUOTE (twinboys @ 10/12/2012, 05:25 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Isn't your praise enough of a reward for a 6 year old?

Or you could buy him a book of his choice to keep the reading up.



Absolutely - agree with this.

#5 KnightsofNi

Posted 10 December 2012 - 05:54 PM

I wanted to reward my 4.5 year old DD for some good behaviour recently. I took her out to lunch, just her and I. She loved her special time with me.

#6 sueb31

Posted 10 December 2012 - 06:00 PM

I'd get a nice looking notebook for him to write in - and write in the front "to my son...We are very proud of you. Love Mum and Dad" December 2012.

I have a little notebook like this from when I was in Grade One and it is precious!! (probably because of the foreword from Dad).

Sue

#7 3'sACharm

Posted 10 December 2012 - 06:33 PM

QUOTE (twinboys @ 10/12/2012, 05:25 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Isn't your praise enough of a reward for a 6 year old?

Or you could buy him a book of his choice to keep the reading up.



QUOTE (kidwrangler @ 10/12/2012, 05:32 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Reward him with your attention - he can choose his favourite meal for dinner / choose somewhere for you to go out to eat together, play a favourite game, make a special cake together, go somewhere fun together (bowling, movie, museum) etc.



QUOTE (Time-to-Shine @ 10/12/2012, 06:54 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I wanted to reward my 4.5 year old DD for some good behaviour recently. I took her out to lunch, just her and I. She loved her special time with me.



QUOTE (sueb31 @ 10/12/2012, 07:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I'd get a nice looking notebook for him to write in - and write in the front "to my son...We are very proud of you. Love Mum and Dad" December 2012.

I have a little notebook like this from when I was in Grade One and it is precious!! (probably because of the foreword from Dad).

Sue


All great suggestions and exactly what I was looking for...might take him to a book store and let him choose something...I know he loves books...maybe even a trip to the local library..thanks all original.gif


#8 Lyra

Posted 10 December 2012 - 07:15 PM

I don't believe in rewarding kids. There has been a lot of research that shows it can be negative in the long run.

#9 Therese

Posted 10 December 2012 - 07:17 PM

We always have a celebratory dinner after report time original.gif We just get takeaway (it isn't particularly fancy wink.gif)

I do like the idea of a book or notebook though original.gif

#10 Harmonica

Posted 10 December 2012 - 07:17 PM

I have sometimes done a date night with my children - to celebrate and reflect on the year that was! Sometimes it has included movies, other times just a restaurant of their choice.

#11 Milly Molly Mandy

Posted 10 December 2012 - 07:29 PM

Last year both my boys went really well, we took them out to dinner at a fancy restaurant where we got a seafood platter to share.. They both got dressed up and it was really special. I think the best part was that we left their little brother who was not quite 2 at the time with nanna so we could have a peaceful meal. They both realised how special the night was and were both impeccably behaved too. I think we will do the same this year regardless of results (not that we are expecting and scary surprises)

#12 Cherish

Posted 10 December 2012 - 08:00 PM

Lyra- could you elaborate plz?

#13 Lyra

Posted 10 December 2012 - 08:53 PM

QUOTE (Cherish @ 10/12/2012, 09:00 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Lyra- could you elaborate plz?



I could but I am about to go bed LOL  The upshot is that if you reward a child for doing something then they see that activity as not being 'worthy' ie I need to be bribed to do it. There was some research where they rewarded kids who read books. At first those kids continued to read but then sharply declined which was in contrast with the kids who weren't rewarded. There was also another study done where kids were told 'well done' or 'you are clever' etc and those kids didn't do as well as kids who were given constructive feedback such as 'the way you solved that problem was interesting'

I got most of this stuff from Punished by Rewards by Alfie Kohn and an article I read but can't find now that I need it!

In response to what I say at report time: I point out to my daughter where she should be on the graph and where she is. Usually she is a little ahead and I will tell her that it's because she concentrated in class, stayed on task etc etc. I have always told her that being smart is not enough, you have to work hard too




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