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Life sucks some times

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#1 soontob6

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:57 PM

My family is usually healthy, mum and dad aren't on bp tabs or have anything really wrong with them, for god's sake, dad has never spent a night in hospital, or even had a cannula.
a couple of weeks ago, I was diagnosed with Graves Disease.  yes, I was stressed about it as it doesn't take much for me to stress over health issues..even though I've never had any real health issues but you know how it is once you've had kids, you think about not being there for them etc.
On Thursday, my dad went to the dr with funny chest pains that spread across his shoulders and down his back a little,  they weren't sore to touch so he wasn't sure what was going on and his father died of a heart attack when dad was little.  When he went to the dr, they did tests and nothing showed up with his heart, they did a blood test though.
That afternoon, dad rang for the results and was told that they were not concerned at all about his heart but something was weird about his blood cells and to come back the next morning.  We were a little worried but thought it might show ross river fever or some other infection.
We weren't really expected the shock,, I can't even write this without crying, I am so angry and scared and think it's bullsh*t...he was diagnosed with chronic myeola (sp) luekemia.  the dr had rang the specialist while mum and dad were in his office and the specialist was the one to diagnose it.  He also said that they've found it early, it has affected his white blood cells (75000) but nothing else, and the dr felt for his spleen and it isn't enlarged either.  The specialist also said that the prognosis is good and dad has to see him next Thursday.
I'm trying to be strong for him, but it breaks my heart when I look at him, knowing that he will be scared and worried.  He is the strong one in our family and is always there to make us feel better about everything.  Like I said, he has never been sick and looking at him now it's so hard to believe because he looks just like he always does, he hasn't really had any other symptoms and we still don't know what those funny pains were but they're gone now.  Like dad said, if he hadn't bothered to go to the dr, he would think he was fine now because the pains gone away.
I don't really know what I'm asking for here, I don't really have a question, more to get it out I guess because I just can't stop thinking about it.  He is the best dad, and definietly the best grandad to his 6 grandkids (he's 54), 4 are mine and especially my oldest daughter just has this special bond to him, she's always been grandads girl.  We aren't going to tell the kids anything unless we absolutly have to.  Our hope is that when he gets back from the specialist on Thursday, he will have positive news and just has to have some medication and should fix him up.
Please noone respond who has anything negative to say, but people who have been through this and has ended well, feel free.

#2 Poss and Soss

Posted 09 December 2012 - 02:31 PM

I know it's hard just now, but be grateful they caught it so early.  Best wishes to you and yours.

#3 beccajayne

Posted 09 December 2012 - 02:47 PM

So similar to what I went through last year with my dad.
First, they've caught it early so that makes all the difference.

My dad was fairly healthy, had a heart attack about 5 years ago and came through that well. He was on lots of medication and as time went on they needed to change it.
He started feeling unwell and it was put down to his medication. After another week my dad was no better so they finally took blood.
Results came back as leukemia ,(can't remember exactly but was in the blood), 6 weeks before my wedding  sad.gif  We found out later that even though it was caught early, he could have bled to death from a tiny cut!

That first week was torture, seeing my strong healthy dad so sick. He couldn't breathe without the oxygen mask and was so pale, deathly pale.

My dad is now much better, still takes chemo drugs on and off monthly. Will for a very long time.
He was in hospital for 6 months but was strong enough to walk me down the aisle, even though I wanted to cancel. The hospital staff allowed him to have 2 days out just to be at my wedding. He was very stubborn and should not really have been there.

I hope it is as simple as you think but I do believe it will be a long process and it's far from easy seeing your dad like that.
Be strong and be there for your dad. Try not to worry, hard I know, they caught it early so the chances are soooo high that he will come through this.
Thinking of you

#4 soontob6

Posted 09 December 2012 - 04:38 PM

Thankyou for the replies,  I'm in tears for you beccajayne, I hope your dad finally gets the all clear.  It only just hit me today that even if whatever treatment he has gets him better, he will actually only be in remission, and it could happen again.  I go from being sad, to scared to just that p*ssed off I want to punch someone.  Why the hell couldn't this happen to some low life druggo, not my dad who is the healthiest out of the whole family, and who is loved by so many, he's the kind of guy that everyone just likes.  There are alot of upset people atm.  I hope that gives him some peace that so many people are thinking of him.  Tho I said to mum, no matter how much we are there for him, he is going to still feel abit alone as none of us have it too iykwim?  My good friends uncle I found out had the hairy cell leukemia about 10 years ago, beat it and has been fine for 8 yrs or so, so when dad gets back from the specialist on Thursday, he's going to call him and have a good chat, I think that will be really good for him

#5 Feral Grey Mare

Posted 09 December 2012 - 04:52 PM

Thank goodness your Dad is one of those men who will actually go to the Dr when something is not right. So many men just keep putting it off until things are way out of hand.

#6 Fright bat

Posted 09 December 2012 - 05:02 PM

QUOTE (soontob6 @ 09/12/2012, 05:38 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I go from being sad, to scared to just that p*ssed off I want to punch someone.

Why the hell couldn't this happen to some low life druggo, not my dad who is the healthiest out of the whole family, and who is loved by so many, he's the kind of guy that everyone just likes.

I think you need to go seek some professional support. It's quite normal to be upset an angry, but neither of the above sentiments are particularly healthy.

Even 'low life druggos' have parents, siblings, children etc who love them.

#7 snuffles

Posted 15 December 2012 - 03:08 PM

Thinking of you x

I was diagnosed with Graves disease about 5 years ago, feel free to PM me if you want to chat about it.

I hope your dad is ok, or ok as possible.

#8 *melrose*

Posted 20 December 2012 - 10:42 AM

sorry op big hugs!

#9 Natttmumm

Posted 20 December 2012 - 10:56 AM

So sorry to hear op my heart goes out to You and your family.
I hope you and your dad recover quickly. The mind is so powerful so as best you can stay positive

#10 roses99

Posted 20 December 2012 - 11:02 AM

I'm sorry, OP. It really does suck.

I think it's totally normal to feel shock and anger; in a way you're going through a grieving period. You're grieving the life you had before the diagnosis and now you feel like this dark shadow hangs over you all. If you find that these feelings don't subside, then make sure you do get some help.

At some point you'll hopefully be able to accept that bad things just do happen to good people. They happen all the time, without rhyme or reason. Perfectly healthy and well-loved little kids get sick all the time too. Once you can move past that, you can gear up to help your dad fight.

A friend of mine had an awful year, during which her husband (and father of their two kids) was diagnosed with an extremely aggressive and serious cancer. After months and months of multiple surgeries, chemo, radiation and experimental drug treatments, he is in remission.

My friend knows her husband's cancer could come back, she knows they could lose him yet. However, she flatly refuses to give in to the fear and she is absolutely determined to live in the here and now and to cherish every moment.

Hopefully you can get to that point too. And I do hope it all goes well - it really is horrible news to get right before Christmas.

#11 AMPSyd

Posted 20 December 2012 - 11:04 AM

OP, just be positive. It was caught early so that is a positive.

My MIL is going through chemo at the moment. Chemo is horrid, she has lost all her hair and feels very, very crappy about 5 days after each treatment - them she feels better and is good for about 2 weeks, then she gets the next treatment. But she is positive and life just goes on as normal when she starts to feel better. If your Dad is otherwise healthy he should handle the chemo (that is if he has to have chemo).

Not all cancer is a life sentence. People do get better (and obviously some don't).

#12 password123

Posted 20 December 2012 - 11:05 AM

QUOTE (MsN @ 09/12/2012, 06:02 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I think you need to go seek some professional support. It's quite normal to be upset an angry, but neither of the above sentiments are particularly healthy.

Even 'low life druggos' have parents, siblings, children etc who love them.

Whatever. It is something I would expect someone in this situation to say.
Good luck OP.

#13 Bwok~Bwok

Posted 20 December 2012 - 11:21 AM

I think you need to go seek some professional support. It's quite normal to be upset an angry, but neither of the above sentiments are particularly healthy.

Even 'low life druggos' have parents, siblings, children etc who love them.

Oh dear god, give her a break she's only just found out and she'll be having a lot of thoughts flying through her head.

#14 soontob6

Posted 30 December 2012 - 10:51 AM

Thanks for all your replies.
We've had good news, dad had another blood test and bone marrow  biopsy and has been diagnosed with chronic myeola sp leukemia and in very early stages, it hasn't affected his blasts just the white blood cells.
The specialist has told him he'll go on these tabs, maybe forever, maybe not, and he'll live a normal life just like he would have if he hadn't been diagnose.
You wouldn't believe the relief!  The dr also said the only people he hasn't seen these tabs work on are the people who don't take them.
Roses99, I hope your friends dh stays in remission, but it does show that even in really scary cases like his, it's amazing what treatment can do to put him in remission, that's a really good sign original.gif

#15 soontob6

Posted 31 December 2012 - 10:26 AM

QUOTE (snuffles @ 15/12/2012, 03:08 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Thinking of you x

I was diagnosed with Graves disease about 5 years ago, feel free to PM me if you want to chat about it.

I hope your dad is ok, or ok as possible.

snuffles I just tried to send you a long drawn out msg and the fing thing wouldn't send and deteled my msg!  can you try to send me one and I'll try to reply?

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