Jump to content

Long School Bus trip for an 11 yr old
Freaking out


  • Please log in to reply
10 replies to this topic

#1 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:08 PM

Hi,
We've just learned that our year 5 boy has been accepted to an independent school next year (Yr.6- he will have just turned 11) and this school is approx. 20 kms , or a 45-55mins STA school bus trip away.
Up until now he has been attending a local school that is literally around the corner and he currently rides to and from school. I admit that I assumed I would have to arrange  before and after school care for my younger child (who also attends local school) for at least a term so that I could drive DS1 to his new school, while he settles in.
DH has just said , no , apart from maybe the first week, he can catch the bus, it will be good for him. Besides that, the before and after school care will add to the financial stress that the new school's fees will place on us.
I am more than mildly freaking out.
We had planned for him to start in Yr.7 but with a long wait-list and no guarantee of a place we felt we needed to grab this opportunity for DS.
I should also add that after many years of back and forth between specialists (and their different opinions about DS1) he was diagnosed with PDD NOS last year. He is very high functioning and has been widely considered 'borderline'.
So am I being overly anxious? I see tons of kids getting on and off buses but now that mine will be one of them he seems too young.
He will of course be given a pre-paid phone so that he can communicate with us.
Can anyone out their share their stories w/ me . Preferably ones that will put my mind at ease.
Thanks.

Edited by no spring chicken, 09 December 2012 - 01:41 PM.


#2 liveworkplay

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:31 PM

I caught two public buses (interchanging in the CBD) to school for 6 years starting at 11. This was pre mobile phone days and I never ever had a negative experience.

#3 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:46 PM

Perhaps I should move this topic to the' kids w/ special needs' section?
Not sure how I do that.

#4 HarperLeeAndMe

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:54 PM

There are a few kids with asd of various ages on our school bus, haven't heard of any problems.  You could ask your son to sit up front near the driver if you are concerned.

#5 MrsShine

Posted 09 December 2012 - 02:47 PM

Hi there,

My nephew is 10 yrs old and low on the autism spectrum and gets the bus to & from school each day which takes an hr each way. He LOVES it! My sister and her ex had been nervous too, (he started last year at this new school) but if anything he's become a lot more confident because of it.

Is this a school bus or public bus though?

My nephews bus is a private school bus, all the kids have their own seat where they sit each day so there is no stress about where to sit, who to sit next to etc. it also helped him make new friends which he'd had trouble with in the past.

#6 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 02:59 PM

QUOTE (MrsShine @ 09/12/2012, 03:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi there,

My nephew is 10 yrs old and low on the autism spectrum and gets the bus to & from school each day which takes an hr each way. He LOVES it! My sister and her ex had been nervous too, (he started last year at this new school) but if anything he's become a lot more confident because of it.

Is this a school bus or public bus though?

My nephews bus is a private school bus, all the kids have their own seat where they sit each day so there is no stress about where to sit, who to sit next to etc. it also helped him make new friends which he'd had trouble with in the past.

It's a public school bus to a private school. I'd feel better if it was the school's own bus. He won't know anyone at the school barring a teacher who is a neighbour of ours.
I am a nervous Nellie who has a talent for catastrophising. It hasn't helped that there has been fresh media attention on the Daniel Morcombe tragedy. I cry every time I read something about that darling boy. I then imagine my boy missing his bus and standing alone at a bus stop. I don't think that wouldn't have crossed the mind of any parent though. mellow.gif

#7 i-candi

Posted 09 December 2012 - 08:27 PM

Here is my year 7 experience of 2012 (I know your DS is only 11 though).

DS went to our local school which is a two minute drive - three in traffic.

For high school we chose an all boys Catholic school that was just over a 45 min drive there and just over an hour on way home.

There were 4 boys from the local primary that went there, the other 3 boys were sports orientated (high school was well known for its sports programs) and DS couldn't kick a ball so DS didn't know these boys as they were in lower school groups and DS had nothing in common with the other boys.

We wanted the Catholic all boys ethos and they do academics well so really DS knew no one when he started.

The school didn't really turn out for DS (DS couldn't cope with the rough boys attitudes) so next year he is going to a local Anglican school.

However apart from issues with the boys from his primary school trying to make DS watch porn !!!!!! Yep teased him because DS didn't want to look at porn  sad.gif   The school quickly jumped on these boys and it was all sorted the bus trip was ok. As it turned out another boy from the Catholic primary in town was in all the same classes as DS so they struck up a friendship.

DS came to love catching the bus because they would all get together on their iPhones and play games against each other. Having a nerd of a dad helped and DS had a great internet/phone connection so he would host servers so he ended up being popular.

There were two regrets DS had leaving his old school, one was missing his teachers and the other missing his bus driver!!!

I got his bus driver a movie gift certificate on his last bus drive just as a thank you for looking after DS. Year 7 boys are made to sit at the front of the bus in the first term for supervision (though the porn issue was first time  unsure.gif  ).

High school (or changing school) is a big thing and the distances are draining, DS would often fall asleep in the morning and afternoon bus trips. One day the boys didn't wake him in the morning to see if he would wake. Lucky for DS the girl school catches the bus and a girl from his primary woke him up!

If I was you I would make your DS catch the bus from day two. The dynamics of the bus will be forming in those early days and your DS needs to be a part of it. I know it's hard, it was hard for me letting go of DS as DS has anxiety and depression so it was a big thing letting him go. I worked at his primary so it was harder for me letting go than for him experiencing the new 'normal'. I made DS catch the bus on day two and I'm so glad I did. Same thing will happen next year at his new school, DH will take DS to school on day one and he will catch the bus in the afternoon and then after that it will always be the bus.

The only thing you need to worry about is ,if it is anything like us, his bus in the morning is the only one to go to school so if you miss it you don't go to school or a parent is late for work. Only happened once because DS got off the bus to get a book from me (I was in the car behind the bus as I went home to get the book he didn't need for school but wanted to read on the bus), DS didn't tell the bus driver to wait or even ask him if he could just get the book. The bus driver drove off and due to living semi rural, and there are about 3 busses leaving town at once you can't actually overtake to get to the next bus stop. Lucky DH had the day off so he took DS to school that day.

Don't let a bus trip turn you off a school, it is really character building. I know I loved the freedom of bussing and training to school. I got to walk through the city to change and I felt so 'old' original.gif although that was a lifetime ago and things have changed.

#8 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 08:37 PM

QUOTE (i-candi @ 09/12/2012, 09:27 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Here is my year 7 experience of 2012 (I know your DS is only 11 though).

DS went to our local school which is a two minute drive - three in traffic.

For high school we chose an all boys Catholic school that was just over a 45 min drive there and just over an hour on way home.

There were 4 boys from the local primary that went there, the other 3 boys were sports orientated (high school was well known for its sports programs) and DS couldn't kick a ball so DS didn't know these boys as they were in lower school groups and DS had nothing in common with the other boys.

We wanted the Catholic all boys ethos and they do academics well so really DS knew no one when he started.

The school didn't really turn out for DS (DS couldn't cope with the rough boys attitudes) so next year he is going to a local Anglican school.

However apart from issues with the boys from his primary school trying to make DS watch porn !!!!!! Yep teased him because DS didn't want to look at porn  sad.gif   The school quickly jumped on these boys and it was all sorted the bus trip was ok. As it turned out another boy from the Catholic primary in town was in all the same classes as DS so they struck up a friendship.

DS came to love catching the bus because they would all get together on their iPhones and play games against each other. Having a nerd of a dad helped and DS had a great internet/phone connection so he would host servers so he ended up being popular.

There were two regrets DS had leaving his old school, one was missing his teachers and the other missing his bus driver!!!

I got his bus driver a movie gift certificate on his last bus drive just as a thank you for looking after DS. Year 7 boys are made to sit at the front of the bus in the first term for supervision (though the porn issue was first time  unsure.gif  ).

High school (or changing school) is a big thing and the distances are draining, DS would often fall asleep in the morning and afternoon bus trips. One day the boys didn't wake him in the morning to see if he would wake. Lucky for DS the girl school catches the bus and a girl from his primary woke him up!

If I was you I would make your DS catch the bus from day two. The dynamics of the bus will be forming in those early days and your DS needs to be a part of it. I know it's hard, it was hard for me letting go of DS as DS has anxiety and depression so it was a big thing letting him go. I worked at his primary so it was harder for me letting go than for him experiencing the new 'normal'. I made DS catch the bus on day two and I'm so glad I did. Same thing will happen next year at his new school, DH will take DS to school on day one and he will catch the bus in the afternoon and then after that it will always be the bus.

The only thing you need to worry about is ,if it is anything like us, his bus in the morning is the only one to go to school so if you miss it you don't go to school or a parent is late for work. Only happened once because DS got off the bus to get a book from me (I was in the car behind the bus as I went home to get the book he didn't need for school but wanted to read on the bus), DS didn't tell the bus driver to wait or even ask him if he could just get the book. The bus driver drove off and due to living semi rural, and there are about 3 busses leaving town at once you can't actually overtake to get to the next bus stop. Lucky DH had the day off so he took DS to school that day.

Don't let a bus trip turn you off a school, it is really character building. I know I loved the freedom of bussing and training to school. I got to walk through the city to change and I felt so 'old' original.gif although that was a lifetime ago and things have changed.


Thank you so much for your reply!
A little bit of the 'worry cloud' blew over.  
I've got a few more weeks to fret on it though!
At least his transition to year 7 will be easier.

#9 capper

Posted 10 December 2012 - 08:50 PM

Hi, my son is now 10 and in year 5.  He catches the bus with a.change of bus in the Sydney CBD.  It takes him about 45 minutes.  The kids at his school are very mobile.  They all catch public busses from about year 5.  The school is in the city and we live in the suburbs.  And yes.  A phone, always charged is necessary.  I usually get texts when leaving school, changing busses and when 5 minutes from home.  

And, they do love catching the bus together.  It is a great social outing.  ( my son is hearing impaired, so I worry about him not hearing cars)

#10 no spring chicken

Posted 10 December 2012 - 09:29 PM

QUOTE (capper @ 10/12/2012, 09:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi, my son is now 10 and in year 5.  He catches the bus with a.change of bus in the Sydney CBD.  It takes him about 45 minutes.  The kids at his school are very mobile.  They all catch public busses from about year 5.  The school is in the city and we live in the suburbs.  And yes.  A phone, always charged is necessary.  I usually get texts when leaving school, changing busses and when 5 minutes from home.  

And, they do love catching the bus together.  It is a great social outing.  ( my son is hearing impaired, so I worry about him not hearing cars)


Thank you. My son also has unilateral hearing loss (wears an aid) so I too worry about his directional hearing and crossing roads etc.
My husband assures me that the bus travel will become a highlight of his day.
I hope this turns out to be true. I guess time will tell.

#11 capper

Posted 11 December 2012 - 06:46 AM

Snap. Unilateral lOSS right ear. Uses a hearing aid and fm at school. It is stressful, but they do it. Maybe just start off with lots of txts. It helps to reassure the parent they are ok.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Wet wipes linked to rise in allergic reactions

The government has issued a health warning after a rise in allergic skin reactions has been linked to a preservative found in some wet wipes.

Gay couple in their 80s first to wed in Dallas after Supreme Court ruling

Love may have won, but it came with quite the wait.

William Tyrrell's family marks birthday with cake and renewed appeal

The family of missing boy William Tyrrell will mark his fourth birthday on Friday making a cake to share with friends and family as NSW police renewed their public appeal for information on his disappearance.

What all parents should know about safe babywearing

A picture of Ryan Reynolds always gets the girls talking, and a recently shared photo has done exactly that - but this time, it's for all the wrong reasons.

Baby's head shape reveals potentially fatal condition

Thinking her baby just had an unusually shaped head, a mother was shocked to discover it was instead linked to a dangerous condition.

'Help - my toddler hits me!'

My toddler has started hitting when he gets frustrated, is feeling ignored, or just thinks it might be fun.

Why IVF success rates may not be what you think

Transparency, accountability and responsibilityare essential measures to protect IVF vulnerable patients.

On the 10th anniversary of my son's death

This day marks a significant day. Today marks 10 years since I lost my son Kai.

Owning a pair of nail scissors does not make me a hairdresser

It's been a whole year since sleeping in until 10am. A whole year since having a peaceful shower.

WIN A $500 VISA DEBIT CARD

Are you a parent, or are you planning to be? Tell us what you think and you'll go in the draw to win a $500 gift card!

Sexy time

Why you should get excited about scheduling sex

Unfortunately, the belief that sex should always be spontaneous is a myth. It just isn't.

Orphaned baby daughter Ayla wakes from coma

Former All Black Jerry Collins' critically injured orphaned daughter has awoken from her coma and is able to bottle-feed.

Dad takes miraculous catch while feeding baby

One American father has taken multitasking to a new level at a Cubs-Dodgers baseball game at Wrigley Field.

'Samuel is our firstborn, and he will never be forgotten'

Having lost their firstborn at one day old, the Carrolls were overjoyed to welcome their daughter Isobel into the world a year later.

The top 6 misleading parenting terms

From 'morning sickness' to 'the terrible twos', there are many parenting terms that are misleading.

When 'good' nannies go bad

While most nannies take pride in their work, there can be some who have a hidden side.

Woman hospitalised for skinny jeans injury

Beware: skinny jeans might be bad for your health.

Gauze seeding: the bacteria-breeding birth trend

A number of women having caesarean deliveries are now taking steps to give their baby a better 'microbiome' start in life.

Jimmy Fallon writes new children's book for dads

Jimmy Fallon, host of NBC's The Tonight Show, recently wrote a children's book about every father's secret wish for their baby's first word to be "dada" - not "mama".

28 names for babies born in winter

Looking for some baby name inspiration for a bub born during the colder months? Here are 28 options from around the world to consider.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

27 funny ultrasound pictures

Ultrasounds give you a look at your growing baby ... and sometimes what appears to their womb-buddy, or your bub in an amusing position.

The horrible act that sparked a brawl at child's birthday party

The uncle of the seven-year-old girl at the centre of the brawl at child's birthday party in Sydney's west has described the events leading up to the alarming show of violence.

Babies 'benefit from iPads at a young age': study

More often than not, you'll read that screen time for children should be kept to a minimum - but some scientists are now challenging this way of thinking.

Do mums really just obsessively talk about their children?

Natalie Reilly describes three main types of conversations mothers have. And, surprise, they're not all about kids.

Why some dogs might attack babies or young kids

A baby's smell, the noises it makes and even its gaze can contribute to the potential for a dog attack.

Mum demands refund for 'beargina' christening cake

It was meant to be a tasteful cake to help celebrate a three-year-old's christening.

5 things no one warns you about after giving birth

How many times have you been warned about all the sleepless nights you have to 'look forward to' when you become a parent?

Police officer sang nursery rhyme as heartbreaking photo was taken

A police officer arrived at a devastating scene on Thursday: a car crash resulting in all passengers being thrown from the vehicle.

Don't worry, working mums: Just leave Dad in charge at home

Want to open the boardroom doors for women? Encourage - heck, praise - dads who stay home with their children.

Hilaria Baldwin shares post-baby selfie

Just two days after giving birth, actor Alec Balwin's wife posted a post-baby picture on social media.

'Help - my child won't ever do what I ask!'

Compliance is part of the parent-child relationship, but so is resistance. It's all natural.

Postnatal depression support gets $23 million boost in NSW

The Baird government will include $22.8 million in Tuesday's NSW budget to expand a program designed to help parents at risk of postnatal depression (PND).

'I'm just as tired, scared and stressed as you': stay-at-home dad's plea

I'm really lucky to have two great kids, but I found it really tough with so much being aimed at the mothers and not the fathers.

6 tips for transitioning back to work after baby

Mums returning to work - and yes, dads too - aren't the same as when they left. But that doesn't mean they're not as good as they once were.

Couple reveals pregnancy with epic Britney Spears parody

How do you create an original pregnancy announcement and gender reveal? You turn to Britney Spears.

The truth about birthing a big baby

When told that they are having a 'big baby', many women have a lot of fears. But those fears are often unfounded.

Eight months pregnant and addicted to eating soap

This bizarre snack takes the cake (of soap) when it comes to weird pregnancy cravings.

Can you spot the drowning child?

Can you spot him in the video? The child who loses his rubber ring, panics, and then almost drowns? It isn't easy.

Noodles, peanuts, wee wees and lady bits

Yes, I know it's silly. I know all the advice from experts is to use the right terminology from the moment your child can talk. But I just can't.

Mum's brave battle for unborn triplets amid cancer diagnosis

Bree O'Malley has a cancer diagnosis, a rare blood condition, kidney and liver failure and other complications. And she is pregnant with triplets.

 

Win $500

WIN A $500 VISA DEBIT CARD

Are you are parent or planning to be? We want to know what you think - let us know and you'll be in the draw to win a $500 gift card.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.