Jump to content

Long School Bus trip for an 11 yr old
Freaking out


  • Please log in to reply
10 replies to this topic

#1 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:08 PM

Hi,
We've just learned that our year 5 boy has been accepted to an independent school next year (Yr.6- he will have just turned 11) and this school is approx. 20 kms , or a 45-55mins STA school bus trip away.
Up until now he has been attending a local school that is literally around the corner and he currently rides to and from school. I admit that I assumed I would have to arrange  before and after school care for my younger child (who also attends local school) for at least a term so that I could drive DS1 to his new school, while he settles in.
DH has just said , no , apart from maybe the first week, he can catch the bus, it will be good for him. Besides that, the before and after school care will add to the financial stress that the new school's fees will place on us.
I am more than mildly freaking out.
We had planned for him to start in Yr.7 but with a long wait-list and no guarantee of a place we felt we needed to grab this opportunity for DS.
I should also add that after many years of back and forth between specialists (and their different opinions about DS1) he was diagnosed with PDD NOS last year. He is very high functioning and has been widely considered 'borderline'.
So am I being overly anxious? I see tons of kids getting on and off buses but now that mine will be one of them he seems too young.
He will of course be given a pre-paid phone so that he can communicate with us.
Can anyone out their share their stories w/ me . Preferably ones that will put my mind at ease.
Thanks.

Edited by no spring chicken, 09 December 2012 - 01:41 PM.


#2 liveworkplay

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:31 PM

I caught two public buses (interchanging in the CBD) to school for 6 years starting at 11. This was pre mobile phone days and I never ever had a negative experience.

#3 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:46 PM

Perhaps I should move this topic to the' kids w/ special needs' section?
Not sure how I do that.

#4 HarperLeeAndMe

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:54 PM

There are a few kids with asd of various ages on our school bus, haven't heard of any problems.  You could ask your son to sit up front near the driver if you are concerned.

#5 MrsShine

Posted 09 December 2012 - 02:47 PM

Hi there,

My nephew is 10 yrs old and low on the autism spectrum and gets the bus to & from school each day which takes an hr each way. He LOVES it! My sister and her ex had been nervous too, (he started last year at this new school) but if anything he's become a lot more confident because of it.

Is this a school bus or public bus though?

My nephews bus is a private school bus, all the kids have their own seat where they sit each day so there is no stress about where to sit, who to sit next to etc. it also helped him make new friends which he'd had trouble with in the past.

#6 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 02:59 PM

QUOTE (MrsShine @ 09/12/2012, 03:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi there,

My nephew is 10 yrs old and low on the autism spectrum and gets the bus to & from school each day which takes an hr each way. He LOVES it! My sister and her ex had been nervous too, (he started last year at this new school) but if anything he's become a lot more confident because of it.

Is this a school bus or public bus though?

My nephews bus is a private school bus, all the kids have their own seat where they sit each day so there is no stress about where to sit, who to sit next to etc. it also helped him make new friends which he'd had trouble with in the past.

It's a public school bus to a private school. I'd feel better if it was the school's own bus. He won't know anyone at the school barring a teacher who is a neighbour of ours.
I am a nervous Nellie who has a talent for catastrophising. It hasn't helped that there has been fresh media attention on the Daniel Morcombe tragedy. I cry every time I read something about that darling boy. I then imagine my boy missing his bus and standing alone at a bus stop. I don't think that wouldn't have crossed the mind of any parent though. mellow.gif

#7 i-candi

Posted 09 December 2012 - 08:27 PM

Here is my year 7 experience of 2012 (I know your DS is only 11 though).

DS went to our local school which is a two minute drive - three in traffic.

For high school we chose an all boys Catholic school that was just over a 45 min drive there and just over an hour on way home.

There were 4 boys from the local primary that went there, the other 3 boys were sports orientated (high school was well known for its sports programs) and DS couldn't kick a ball so DS didn't know these boys as they were in lower school groups and DS had nothing in common with the other boys.

We wanted the Catholic all boys ethos and they do academics well so really DS knew no one when he started.

The school didn't really turn out for DS (DS couldn't cope with the rough boys attitudes) so next year he is going to a local Anglican school.

However apart from issues with the boys from his primary school trying to make DS watch porn !!!!!! Yep teased him because DS didn't want to look at porn  sad.gif   The school quickly jumped on these boys and it was all sorted the bus trip was ok. As it turned out another boy from the Catholic primary in town was in all the same classes as DS so they struck up a friendship.

DS came to love catching the bus because they would all get together on their iPhones and play games against each other. Having a nerd of a dad helped and DS had a great internet/phone connection so he would host servers so he ended up being popular.

There were two regrets DS had leaving his old school, one was missing his teachers and the other missing his bus driver!!!

I got his bus driver a movie gift certificate on his last bus drive just as a thank you for looking after DS. Year 7 boys are made to sit at the front of the bus in the first term for supervision (though the porn issue was first time  unsure.gif  ).

High school (or changing school) is a big thing and the distances are draining, DS would often fall asleep in the morning and afternoon bus trips. One day the boys didn't wake him in the morning to see if he would wake. Lucky for DS the girl school catches the bus and a girl from his primary woke him up!

If I was you I would make your DS catch the bus from day two. The dynamics of the bus will be forming in those early days and your DS needs to be a part of it. I know it's hard, it was hard for me letting go of DS as DS has anxiety and depression so it was a big thing letting him go. I worked at his primary so it was harder for me letting go than for him experiencing the new 'normal'. I made DS catch the bus on day two and I'm so glad I did. Same thing will happen next year at his new school, DH will take DS to school on day one and he will catch the bus in the afternoon and then after that it will always be the bus.

The only thing you need to worry about is ,if it is anything like us, his bus in the morning is the only one to go to school so if you miss it you don't go to school or a parent is late for work. Only happened once because DS got off the bus to get a book from me (I was in the car behind the bus as I went home to get the book he didn't need for school but wanted to read on the bus), DS didn't tell the bus driver to wait or even ask him if he could just get the book. The bus driver drove off and due to living semi rural, and there are about 3 busses leaving town at once you can't actually overtake to get to the next bus stop. Lucky DH had the day off so he took DS to school that day.

Don't let a bus trip turn you off a school, it is really character building. I know I loved the freedom of bussing and training to school. I got to walk through the city to change and I felt so 'old' original.gif although that was a lifetime ago and things have changed.

#8 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 08:37 PM

QUOTE (i-candi @ 09/12/2012, 09:27 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Here is my year 7 experience of 2012 (I know your DS is only 11 though).

DS went to our local school which is a two minute drive - three in traffic.

For high school we chose an all boys Catholic school that was just over a 45 min drive there and just over an hour on way home.

There were 4 boys from the local primary that went there, the other 3 boys were sports orientated (high school was well known for its sports programs) and DS couldn't kick a ball so DS didn't know these boys as they were in lower school groups and DS had nothing in common with the other boys.

We wanted the Catholic all boys ethos and they do academics well so really DS knew no one when he started.

The school didn't really turn out for DS (DS couldn't cope with the rough boys attitudes) so next year he is going to a local Anglican school.

However apart from issues with the boys from his primary school trying to make DS watch porn !!!!!! Yep teased him because DS didn't want to look at porn  sad.gif   The school quickly jumped on these boys and it was all sorted the bus trip was ok. As it turned out another boy from the Catholic primary in town was in all the same classes as DS so they struck up a friendship.

DS came to love catching the bus because they would all get together on their iPhones and play games against each other. Having a nerd of a dad helped and DS had a great internet/phone connection so he would host servers so he ended up being popular.

There were two regrets DS had leaving his old school, one was missing his teachers and the other missing his bus driver!!!

I got his bus driver a movie gift certificate on his last bus drive just as a thank you for looking after DS. Year 7 boys are made to sit at the front of the bus in the first term for supervision (though the porn issue was first time  unsure.gif  ).

High school (or changing school) is a big thing and the distances are draining, DS would often fall asleep in the morning and afternoon bus trips. One day the boys didn't wake him in the morning to see if he would wake. Lucky for DS the girl school catches the bus and a girl from his primary woke him up!

If I was you I would make your DS catch the bus from day two. The dynamics of the bus will be forming in those early days and your DS needs to be a part of it. I know it's hard, it was hard for me letting go of DS as DS has anxiety and depression so it was a big thing letting him go. I worked at his primary so it was harder for me letting go than for him experiencing the new 'normal'. I made DS catch the bus on day two and I'm so glad I did. Same thing will happen next year at his new school, DH will take DS to school on day one and he will catch the bus in the afternoon and then after that it will always be the bus.

The only thing you need to worry about is ,if it is anything like us, his bus in the morning is the only one to go to school so if you miss it you don't go to school or a parent is late for work. Only happened once because DS got off the bus to get a book from me (I was in the car behind the bus as I went home to get the book he didn't need for school but wanted to read on the bus), DS didn't tell the bus driver to wait or even ask him if he could just get the book. The bus driver drove off and due to living semi rural, and there are about 3 busses leaving town at once you can't actually overtake to get to the next bus stop. Lucky DH had the day off so he took DS to school that day.

Don't let a bus trip turn you off a school, it is really character building. I know I loved the freedom of bussing and training to school. I got to walk through the city to change and I felt so 'old' original.gif although that was a lifetime ago and things have changed.


Thank you so much for your reply!
A little bit of the 'worry cloud' blew over.  
I've got a few more weeks to fret on it though!
At least his transition to year 7 will be easier.

#9 capper

Posted 10 December 2012 - 08:50 PM

Hi, my son is now 10 and in year 5.  He catches the bus with a.change of bus in the Sydney CBD.  It takes him about 45 minutes.  The kids at his school are very mobile.  They all catch public busses from about year 5.  The school is in the city and we live in the suburbs.  And yes.  A phone, always charged is necessary.  I usually get texts when leaving school, changing busses and when 5 minutes from home.  

And, they do love catching the bus together.  It is a great social outing.  ( my son is hearing impaired, so I worry about him not hearing cars)

#10 no spring chicken

Posted 10 December 2012 - 09:29 PM

QUOTE (capper @ 10/12/2012, 09:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi, my son is now 10 and in year 5.  He catches the bus with a.change of bus in the Sydney CBD.  It takes him about 45 minutes.  The kids at his school are very mobile.  They all catch public busses from about year 5.  The school is in the city and we live in the suburbs.  And yes.  A phone, always charged is necessary.  I usually get texts when leaving school, changing busses and when 5 minutes from home.  

And, they do love catching the bus together.  It is a great social outing.  ( my son is hearing impaired, so I worry about him not hearing cars)


Thank you. My son also has unilateral hearing loss (wears an aid) so I too worry about his directional hearing and crossing roads etc.
My husband assures me that the bus travel will become a highlight of his day.
I hope this turns out to be true. I guess time will tell.

#11 capper

Posted 11 December 2012 - 06:46 AM

Snap. Unilateral lOSS right ear. Uses a hearing aid and fm at school. It is stressful, but they do it. Maybe just start off with lots of txts. It helps to reassure the parent they are ok.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

How a baby can survive alone for days on end

The baby found abandoned in a Sydney drain may have been alone for up to six days without being fed, leaving many asking how he could have survived.

When it begins to look a lot like Christmas

A child's excitement at Christmas time is a beautiful thing, but one dad ponders whether his toddler daughter is getting into the festive mood a bit too soon.

Hospital lets dads the experience some of the pain of childbirth

A new experience is radically altering men's views of childbirth.

Italian doctors questioned over formula bribes

Italian police have placed 12 doctors under house arrest on suspicion of promoting baby milk formula over breastfeeding.

Heartwarming prank gives single mum the house she was hired to clean

Cara Simmons arrived at work to clean a large and beautiful house in time for a party planned for that evening. It was soon hers.

Those special moments of sibling bonding

Every now and then your child does or says something that is truly memorable.

Why we should stop telling new parents to 'enjoy every moment'

A few weeks ago, some dear friends of mine had their first baby. As the proud dad texted me a picture I had to fight the natural instinct to say “Enjoy every moment!”

Baby monitor footage posted online

Footage of Australian babies and children sleeping in their bedrooms are among the images on a Russian site showing live feeds from thousands of homes and businesses around the world.

Did this new dad really hit on his wife's midwife?

Was there really a man who was actually there by his wife’s side as she laboured and gave birth to his child, all while he was making what he perceived to be meaningful eye contact with a midwife?

Keep calm and ignore the Tantrum Trolls

Tantrum Trolls are a small but growing species of predatory bottom-feeders who delight in picking on parents at their most vulnerable.

It's okay to never 'get over' the death of a loved one

The death of children, siblings, and parents has long term impacts on the rest of our lives.

What Mark Latham needs to know about depression and motherhood

In a bizarre bid for relevancy, Former Opposition leader Mark Latham has deduced that because one female journalist had this week light-heartedly thanked antidepressants and caffeine for getting her through a medical degree while raising two small children, that ergo, all 'inner-city feminists' are selfish harridans who despise their offspring.

'We're just trying to keep our child alive': life with FPIES

We have a beautiful seven-month-old son, and his allergy rules our life.

Transgender dad breastfeeds his babies

A transgender man who breastfed his first baby - despite having his breasts removed as part of his transformation from female to male - has now had a second child.

Couple face $1 million medical bill and bankruptcy after babymoon birth

A Canadian couple were slammed with a million dollar medical bill after their daughter was prematurely during their babymoon.

Win one of 5 Little Tikes Cozy Coupe Sport

Australia?s No 1 selling car is now available in a Sports model and we have 5 to give away to some lucky Essential Baby families.

Cigarettes, junk food dominate supermarket sales growth

One in every five dollars spent at supermarkets goes on cigarettes or junk food, according to industry data.

Teacher under fire for breastfeeding in class

There is no doubt mums have a right to continue breastfeeding after they have returned to work, but one teacher in the US has taken it to the extreme.

Video: Baby sniffs beardless dad to make sure it's him

She looks him up and down and then touches his chin, but baby Lindsey still isn't sure this clean-shaven man is her dad.

The tragedy of losing a favourite teddy bear

We were green and uninitiated, perhaps a little naïve when it came to the favourite toy responsibility.

It's possible to workout while pregnant

Medical experts say intense fitness routines can be done safely during pregnancy - if the mums-to-be follow some guidelines.

Baby for Asher Keddie and Vincent Fantauzzo

Fans followed every step of her on-screen pregnancy in Offspring, now Asher Keddie is going to be a mum in real life too.

What parents really want for their kids

Are our hopes, dreams and expectations for our children what they really need?

'I had a feeling something was seriously wrong': the fight for Kaden's diagnosis

Before even giving birth, Katie Myers' maternal instincts warned her something was wrong with her baby.

Win a family pass to Disney Live!

We have 4 family passes to give away to see Disney Live! presents Three Classic Fairy Tales, touring Australia this December/January.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Win one of 5 Little Tikes Cozy Coupe Sport

Australia?s No 1 selling car is now available in a Sports model and we have 5 to give away to some lucky Essential Baby families.

Join PADDINGTON on the red carpet!

To celebrate the release of PADDINGTON, we are giving five lucky winners the chance to win a family pass to the exclusive Australian Premiere in Sydney on December 7!

When your pregnancy causes a relationship rift

Some dads-to-be don't miss a beat when their partner is pregnant; others struggle with a range of issues and can become withdrawn, right when their support is needed most.

Couple uses group photo trick to announce pregnancy to loved ones

Katharine and Kris Camilli devised a clever trick to immortalise their family and friends' reactions to their exciting pregnancy news.

Why Tracey Spicer has given up make-up

"After 30 years on television, I had become what I despised: a painted doll who spent an hour a day and close to $200 a week putting on a mask."

Knowing you are one of the lucky ones

I am secure, confident and strong, but the responsibility of protecting my children can almost bring me undone.

Why I am so emotional now I have kids?

There are so many ways in which parenthood changes us as women, but one of the most noticeable, for me, has been the changing state of my emotions.

Baby survives despite sharing womb with 'foreign body'

Baby Maia was conceived against the odds, only to find she was sharing a womb with an ominous "foreign body".

Video: Baby shows dog how to jump - or vice versa

They say dog is man's best friend, but this playful pooch seems to have chosen a jumping baby as her number one buddy.

10 ways to soothe a crying baby

New paernts can get frustrated when their newborn gets fussy and can't settle down. When you're feeling overwhelmed, try some of these simple tips to help soothe your baby.

20 baby names that are becoming more popular every year

The data-lovers at nameberry.com have been at it again – this time, they’ve discovered the names that are continually rising up the ranks, ready to take out some top spots in the next few years.

10 great meals to make for new parents

Ideally, you want to give food that isn’t expensive to make, isn't too difficult to create, and freezes well; stews, bakes, soups and pasta sauces are perfect.

'It's not you, it's me': Boston bombing survivor mum to have leg amputated

Rebekah DiMartino is going through a break-up. She even wrote a farewell love letter. But it's not to her husband.

What it's like to go through early menopause

In a cruel twist, Carla had been breastfeeding and perimenopausal at the same time. But she's far from the only one to go through menopause early.

Weird pregnancy products

Some pregnancy products come to market and are just awesome. Others just leave you scratching your head.

Restaurant served alcohol to two-year-old

Busy restaurants can be forgiven for getting food and drink orders mixed up from time to time, but not when the confusion leads to a two-year-old being served an alcoholic cocktail instead of the child-friendly beverage they ordered.

Julia Morris tells of miscarriage on a flight

Julia Morris has spoken about the devastation of suffering a miscarriage while on an international flight.

Woman's survival after birth 'a story of two miracles'

A US mother is home and tending to her new baby less than a month after surviving without a pulse for 45 minutes.

Best maternity swimwear and beach cover-ups

Thinking about a tropical babymoon but have nothing to wear? Here are some great swimwear and beach cover-up options for mums-to-be.

Duchess's letter to grieving mum

The Duchess of Cambridge has written to a grieving mum on a "very difficult" day.

 

How many weeks til Christmas?

On your To-Do list

Get the "Santa" shopping done without the kids in tow.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.