Jump to content

Long School Bus trip for an 11 yr old
Freaking out


  • Please log in to reply
10 replies to this topic

#1 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:08 PM

Hi,
We've just learned that our year 5 boy has been accepted to an independent school next year (Yr.6- he will have just turned 11) and this school is approx. 20 kms , or a 45-55mins STA school bus trip away.
Up until now he has been attending a local school that is literally around the corner and he currently rides to and from school. I admit that I assumed I would have to arrange  before and after school care for my younger child (who also attends local school) for at least a term so that I could drive DS1 to his new school, while he settles in.
DH has just said , no , apart from maybe the first week, he can catch the bus, it will be good for him. Besides that, the before and after school care will add to the financial stress that the new school's fees will place on us.
I am more than mildly freaking out.
We had planned for him to start in Yr.7 but with a long wait-list and no guarantee of a place we felt we needed to grab this opportunity for DS.
I should also add that after many years of back and forth between specialists (and their different opinions about DS1) he was diagnosed with PDD NOS last year. He is very high functioning and has been widely considered 'borderline'.
So am I being overly anxious? I see tons of kids getting on and off buses but now that mine will be one of them he seems too young.
He will of course be given a pre-paid phone so that he can communicate with us.
Can anyone out their share their stories w/ me . Preferably ones that will put my mind at ease.
Thanks.

Edited by no spring chicken, 09 December 2012 - 01:41 PM.


#2 liveworkplay

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:31 PM

I caught two public buses (interchanging in the CBD) to school for 6 years starting at 11. This was pre mobile phone days and I never ever had a negative experience.

#3 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:46 PM

Perhaps I should move this topic to the' kids w/ special needs' section?
Not sure how I do that.

#4 HarperLeeAndMe

Posted 09 December 2012 - 01:54 PM

There are a few kids with asd of various ages on our school bus, haven't heard of any problems.  You could ask your son to sit up front near the driver if you are concerned.

#5 MrsShine

Posted 09 December 2012 - 02:47 PM

Hi there,

My nephew is 10 yrs old and low on the autism spectrum and gets the bus to & from school each day which takes an hr each way. He LOVES it! My sister and her ex had been nervous too, (he started last year at this new school) but if anything he's become a lot more confident because of it.

Is this a school bus or public bus though?

My nephews bus is a private school bus, all the kids have their own seat where they sit each day so there is no stress about where to sit, who to sit next to etc. it also helped him make new friends which he'd had trouble with in the past.

#6 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 02:59 PM

QUOTE (MrsShine @ 09/12/2012, 03:47 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi there,

My nephew is 10 yrs old and low on the autism spectrum and gets the bus to & from school each day which takes an hr each way. He LOVES it! My sister and her ex had been nervous too, (he started last year at this new school) but if anything he's become a lot more confident because of it.

Is this a school bus or public bus though?

My nephews bus is a private school bus, all the kids have their own seat where they sit each day so there is no stress about where to sit, who to sit next to etc. it also helped him make new friends which he'd had trouble with in the past.

It's a public school bus to a private school. I'd feel better if it was the school's own bus. He won't know anyone at the school barring a teacher who is a neighbour of ours.
I am a nervous Nellie who has a talent for catastrophising. It hasn't helped that there has been fresh media attention on the Daniel Morcombe tragedy. I cry every time I read something about that darling boy. I then imagine my boy missing his bus and standing alone at a bus stop. I don't think that wouldn't have crossed the mind of any parent though. mellow.gif

#7 i-candi

Posted 09 December 2012 - 08:27 PM

Here is my year 7 experience of 2012 (I know your DS is only 11 though).

DS went to our local school which is a two minute drive - three in traffic.

For high school we chose an all boys Catholic school that was just over a 45 min drive there and just over an hour on way home.

There were 4 boys from the local primary that went there, the other 3 boys were sports orientated (high school was well known for its sports programs) and DS couldn't kick a ball so DS didn't know these boys as they were in lower school groups and DS had nothing in common with the other boys.

We wanted the Catholic all boys ethos and they do academics well so really DS knew no one when he started.

The school didn't really turn out for DS (DS couldn't cope with the rough boys attitudes) so next year he is going to a local Anglican school.

However apart from issues with the boys from his primary school trying to make DS watch porn !!!!!! Yep teased him because DS didn't want to look at porn  sad.gif   The school quickly jumped on these boys and it was all sorted the bus trip was ok. As it turned out another boy from the Catholic primary in town was in all the same classes as DS so they struck up a friendship.

DS came to love catching the bus because they would all get together on their iPhones and play games against each other. Having a nerd of a dad helped and DS had a great internet/phone connection so he would host servers so he ended up being popular.

There were two regrets DS had leaving his old school, one was missing his teachers and the other missing his bus driver!!!

I got his bus driver a movie gift certificate on his last bus drive just as a thank you for looking after DS. Year 7 boys are made to sit at the front of the bus in the first term for supervision (though the porn issue was first time  unsure.gif  ).

High school (or changing school) is a big thing and the distances are draining, DS would often fall asleep in the morning and afternoon bus trips. One day the boys didn't wake him in the morning to see if he would wake. Lucky for DS the girl school catches the bus and a girl from his primary woke him up!

If I was you I would make your DS catch the bus from day two. The dynamics of the bus will be forming in those early days and your DS needs to be a part of it. I know it's hard, it was hard for me letting go of DS as DS has anxiety and depression so it was a big thing letting him go. I worked at his primary so it was harder for me letting go than for him experiencing the new 'normal'. I made DS catch the bus on day two and I'm so glad I did. Same thing will happen next year at his new school, DH will take DS to school on day one and he will catch the bus in the afternoon and then after that it will always be the bus.

The only thing you need to worry about is ,if it is anything like us, his bus in the morning is the only one to go to school so if you miss it you don't go to school or a parent is late for work. Only happened once because DS got off the bus to get a book from me (I was in the car behind the bus as I went home to get the book he didn't need for school but wanted to read on the bus), DS didn't tell the bus driver to wait or even ask him if he could just get the book. The bus driver drove off and due to living semi rural, and there are about 3 busses leaving town at once you can't actually overtake to get to the next bus stop. Lucky DH had the day off so he took DS to school that day.

Don't let a bus trip turn you off a school, it is really character building. I know I loved the freedom of bussing and training to school. I got to walk through the city to change and I felt so 'old' original.gif although that was a lifetime ago and things have changed.

#8 no spring chicken

Posted 09 December 2012 - 08:37 PM

QUOTE (i-candi @ 09/12/2012, 09:27 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Here is my year 7 experience of 2012 (I know your DS is only 11 though).

DS went to our local school which is a two minute drive - three in traffic.

For high school we chose an all boys Catholic school that was just over a 45 min drive there and just over an hour on way home.

There were 4 boys from the local primary that went there, the other 3 boys were sports orientated (high school was well known for its sports programs) and DS couldn't kick a ball so DS didn't know these boys as they were in lower school groups and DS had nothing in common with the other boys.

We wanted the Catholic all boys ethos and they do academics well so really DS knew no one when he started.

The school didn't really turn out for DS (DS couldn't cope with the rough boys attitudes) so next year he is going to a local Anglican school.

However apart from issues with the boys from his primary school trying to make DS watch porn !!!!!! Yep teased him because DS didn't want to look at porn  sad.gif   The school quickly jumped on these boys and it was all sorted the bus trip was ok. As it turned out another boy from the Catholic primary in town was in all the same classes as DS so they struck up a friendship.

DS came to love catching the bus because they would all get together on their iPhones and play games against each other. Having a nerd of a dad helped and DS had a great internet/phone connection so he would host servers so he ended up being popular.

There were two regrets DS had leaving his old school, one was missing his teachers and the other missing his bus driver!!!

I got his bus driver a movie gift certificate on his last bus drive just as a thank you for looking after DS. Year 7 boys are made to sit at the front of the bus in the first term for supervision (though the porn issue was first time  unsure.gif  ).

High school (or changing school) is a big thing and the distances are draining, DS would often fall asleep in the morning and afternoon bus trips. One day the boys didn't wake him in the morning to see if he would wake. Lucky for DS the girl school catches the bus and a girl from his primary woke him up!

If I was you I would make your DS catch the bus from day two. The dynamics of the bus will be forming in those early days and your DS needs to be a part of it. I know it's hard, it was hard for me letting go of DS as DS has anxiety and depression so it was a big thing letting him go. I worked at his primary so it was harder for me letting go than for him experiencing the new 'normal'. I made DS catch the bus on day two and I'm so glad I did. Same thing will happen next year at his new school, DH will take DS to school on day one and he will catch the bus in the afternoon and then after that it will always be the bus.

The only thing you need to worry about is ,if it is anything like us, his bus in the morning is the only one to go to school so if you miss it you don't go to school or a parent is late for work. Only happened once because DS got off the bus to get a book from me (I was in the car behind the bus as I went home to get the book he didn't need for school but wanted to read on the bus), DS didn't tell the bus driver to wait or even ask him if he could just get the book. The bus driver drove off and due to living semi rural, and there are about 3 busses leaving town at once you can't actually overtake to get to the next bus stop. Lucky DH had the day off so he took DS to school that day.

Don't let a bus trip turn you off a school, it is really character building. I know I loved the freedom of bussing and training to school. I got to walk through the city to change and I felt so 'old' original.gif although that was a lifetime ago and things have changed.


Thank you so much for your reply!
A little bit of the 'worry cloud' blew over.  
I've got a few more weeks to fret on it though!
At least his transition to year 7 will be easier.

#9 capper

Posted 10 December 2012 - 08:50 PM

Hi, my son is now 10 and in year 5.  He catches the bus with a.change of bus in the Sydney CBD.  It takes him about 45 minutes.  The kids at his school are very mobile.  They all catch public busses from about year 5.  The school is in the city and we live in the suburbs.  And yes.  A phone, always charged is necessary.  I usually get texts when leaving school, changing busses and when 5 minutes from home.  

And, they do love catching the bus together.  It is a great social outing.  ( my son is hearing impaired, so I worry about him not hearing cars)

#10 no spring chicken

Posted 10 December 2012 - 09:29 PM

QUOTE (capper @ 10/12/2012, 09:50 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi, my son is now 10 and in year 5.  He catches the bus with a.change of bus in the Sydney CBD.  It takes him about 45 minutes.  The kids at his school are very mobile.  They all catch public busses from about year 5.  The school is in the city and we live in the suburbs.  And yes.  A phone, always charged is necessary.  I usually get texts when leaving school, changing busses and when 5 minutes from home.  

And, they do love catching the bus together.  It is a great social outing.  ( my son is hearing impaired, so I worry about him not hearing cars)


Thank you. My son also has unilateral hearing loss (wears an aid) so I too worry about his directional hearing and crossing roads etc.
My husband assures me that the bus travel will become a highlight of his day.
I hope this turns out to be true. I guess time will tell.

#11 capper

Posted 11 December 2012 - 06:46 AM

Snap. Unilateral lOSS right ear. Uses a hearing aid and fm at school. It is stressful, but they do it. Maybe just start off with lots of txts. It helps to reassure the parent they are ok.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Clever panda fakes pregnancy

News that a giant panda was pregnant prompted much excitement, but it appears there were never any cubs on the way.

'I survived placenta percreta'

When writing her birth plan, Simone Pavil included an item most women wouldn?t even think about: what should happen if she was put on life support. The mum had the potentially fatal condition placenta accreta.

Managing personal space as a mum

In the midst of the early parenting years, our bodies and minds can seemingly be overtaken by our offspring. How can we balance our need for personal space with the needs of our children?

'If love could have saved you, you'd have never left'

The words "spontaneous abortion" on the hospital paperwork really got to me. My baby died; I didn't spontaneously decide to abort him.

15 classic Aussie ads

Watch some of the classic Australian ads of the 80s, 90s and 00s, and remember the catchphrases and jingles we all used to know so well ...

For and against

Should Blue Ivy have been at the VMAs?

Many were quick to condemn Beyonce and Jay Z after appearing on stage at the MTV Video Music Awards with their two-year-old daughter, but others thought it was a sweet family moment. What do you think?

Toddler attacked at gym creche

Two-year-old girl Eva Ness was left with a black eye and bite marks on her face and body after an altercation with an older child at a health club's child-minding facilities. Now her parents are calling for the centre to be closed.

Pregnancy a tricky matter of timing for FIFO couples

Manipulating rosters, coordinating 'conjugal' visits, working on site with your partner; getting pregnant can prove stressful for FIFO workers.

WIN a $100 RedBalloon for Dad

Enter now for your chance to win 1 of 5 $100 RedBalloon experience vouchers. Helping you make Dad's Day EXTRA HAPPY.

Carseats have twice as many germs as a toilet

Most parents know their child's carseat is not always squeaky clean, but they might not realise just how dirty it really is.

Doctors remove foetus from 'medical marvel' after 36 years

Doctors in India have removed the skeleton of a foetus that had been inside a woman for 36 years.

Nine months in six seconds: new parents' Vine clip a hit

We?ve seen some memorable time-lapse pregnancy and birth announcement videos before. Now one new couple has taken it to the extreme, capturing it all in just a six-second Vine video.

Sonia Kruger speaks of baby joy

Celebrity mum-to-be Sonia Kruger has spoken candidly about using donor eggs and IVF to fall pregnant at age 48.

Dressing to not impress: life through the eyes of a three-year-old

When it comes to getting dressed, my three-year-old has only one criterion: ?I don?t want to look beautiful.? And now I've worked out why.

Special nappies made with love for angel babies

Angel Baby Nappies make and provide tiny bereavement cloth nappies for pre-term stillborn babies and premature babies who pass away in the NICU.

Inside the brain of a tantruming toddler

What's going on in your child's mind in the lead-up to a tantrum? And what?s the best way to respond?

5 secrets to a long-lasting relationship

When it comes to keeping your relationship strong, it?s what you do - and not what you want - that really matters.

When 'furbabies' meet real babies

I am obsessed with my dogs, and can't imagine loving them any less once my baby arrives. But that doesn't stop everyone from telling me I will.

The least popular baby names of 2013

Looking for a baby name that?s nowhere near the top 10 ? or even the top 1000? Try the bottom five.

'I was so sleep deprived I crashed my car'

There are no laws regulating driving while tired, but statistics show that driver fatigue is one of the top three contributors to the road toll.

Win back some precious time and get FREE coupons

Membership to eBay's Bubs? Corner is free and includes a $10 coupon to spend on nappies each month - a win for multitasking mums!

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

WIN a $100 RedBalloon for Dad

Enter now for your chance to win 1 of 5 $100 RedBalloon experience vouchers. Helping you make Dad's Day EXTRA HAPPY.

Win back some precious time and get FREE coupons

Membership to eBay's Bubs? Corner is free and includes a $10 coupon to spend on nappies each month - a win for multitasking mums!

Do you suffer from Precious Firstborn Syndrome?

Testing ?no more tears? shampoo in your own eyes, warming cucumber sticks so they're not cold straight from the fridge, waking a sleeping baby to check they?re still breathing: these are all symptoms of Precious Firstborn Syndrome.

Ezra's tragic death not in vain, mum says

Little Ezra was a "Harry Houdini" who loved trying to escape the family home. Now, after his tragic death, his parents are doing what they can to help others.

7 mistakes old hands make with new babies

As I sat across the table from my friend ? me, a seasoned mother of three; her, a brand new mum ? I thought of all the mistakes an old-hand parent can make when visiting a newborn baby.

Video: When adults act like children

Ever wondered what would happen if adults were allowed to act like children? This dad's hilarious video clip will give you an idea of what life would be like.

Mums hit hardest as flu cases skyrocket

The number of confirmed cases of influenza in Australia has doubled the number for the same time last year - and women are 25 per cent more likely to get it.

The mum who had four babies in nine months

Feeling exhausted due to the demands of caring for a baby? Imagine the life of this mum, who gave birth to three boys and one girl in just nine months.

Everything baby at Big W

Lowest prices on everything baby, only at Big W. Sale starts August 4 and ends August 20 2014.

Going viral

Weirdest pregnancy products

From pee stick keepers to stylish sick bags, there are some very strange inventions out there for pregnant women.

Personalised baby gifts

We've scoured the internet to find gorgeous personalised keepsakes and nursery decor to record baby name and dates. They make great gifts for christenings, name days and birthdays! (All prices in AU.)

 

Mind, body, beauty, life

Making time for me

We look at your wellbeing, covering health, relationships, beauty and fashion, mind and body.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.