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Anyone else finding their child frustrating?

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#1 misse10

Posted 07 December 2012 - 03:03 PM

Let me start by saying i love by gorgeous son to pieces...but i am finding him a little frustrating right now.
He's nearly 7 months and doesn't sit or crawl (which i'm not worried about!!) but consequently he seems to need my complete attention & entertainment 100% of the time.

ok, i realise i'll probably need to watch him constantly when he can crawl too, but he's so frustrated with throwing his toys away and then not being able to reach them...or rolling onto his tummy and then not being able to go anywhere...that he whinges all the time. If I pick him up he's happy for a minute and then he wriggles/squirms trying to get away again. unless i'm actually singing songs or playing with the toys he's not happy for long.

i can't find any time to wrap the christmas presents, put up the childproofing stuff or cook. he does have good day sleeps but there's a limit to how much you can get done then (especially as i'm trying to do some work from home too).

Is this just what being a mum is & i should just deal with it? Or does the needing me all the time thing ever pass? Or at least the whinging?!

Edited by misse10, 07 December 2012 - 03:07 PM.

#2 axiomae

Posted 07 December 2012 - 09:09 PM

My LO is almost 6 months and every now and then she has a really grizzly few days where she just needs constant attention, and then it passes again and she's happy on her own to play for a while again. I'm thinking it could be teething or something, just needs extra cuddles sometimes.

Do you have a jolly jumper or jumperoo? They are godsends! My DD will happily play in both for a long tim - I'm sure she'd stay in the jumperoo all day if I'd let her! Gives me time to wash up, get things done etc

You could also try wearing your LO in a carrier of some sort while you get on with things, always helps and bubs love it.

#3 Feral-as-Meggs

Posted 08 December 2012 - 06:45 PM

Is he too old for one of those mats with the arches over, with dangling toys?   We had one which played a tune and spun around, with a dangling mirror.

#4 Fright bat

Posted 08 December 2012 - 06:49 PM

Classic seven month old behaviour. "I want to move but can't".

On baby number 2 now - I just leave him to whine. This too will pass OP.

Wrap your presents. Give him some paper to scrunch while you do it. And block out the whining as much as you can!

#5 Princess.cranky.pants

Posted 08 December 2012 - 07:00 PM

Around 7 months DD3 started getting really difficult. Sorry to say this but she is still really hard work at 2.3 years! She is my most challenging child.

Anything non toy related was good for entertaining my kids. Plastic lids, spoons, pegs and an ice cream container, bottle with rice in it, board books.

#6 Just Another Cat

Posted 08 December 2012 - 07:07 PM

My DS is doing the same. DD did it too at this age.

I think they are just so frustrated. They're smart enough to know what they want, but physically unable to do it.

It does pass. Once they're mobile a whole new world opens up.

#7 Kay1

Posted 08 December 2012 - 07:12 PM

Its a tricky stage. I always found having some nice upbeat music on helped a little. Worth a try.

#8 Zahhy

Posted 08 December 2012 - 07:12 PM

Yep, I generally hate the time 3-7months, they know there's fun stuff happening around them, but they're not yet able to join in. Frustrating for them and for you.

#9 Miss Kiwi

Posted 08 December 2012 - 07:18 PM

He sounds frustrated to me as well. I would invest in an activity walker, I found it a godsend with our DS when he was going through that stage! He LOVED his walker so much, would happily sit in it and play with all of the various activities on it and then worked out how to walk around in it.
Worth every single cent!!!

#10 Babetty

Posted 08 December 2012 - 07:26 PM

Yes, I remember that stage with DS. Wanting to move but getting frustrated.

DO as much stuff as you can next to him - eg wrap presents on the floor next to him, put a play mat by your feet in the kitchen - and give him a running commentary of everything you're doing. It helped for my DS.

And don't worry about letting him whinge or grizzle for a bit - the frustration of trying to get to an out-of-reach toy is what gets them moving!

#11 harryhoo

Posted 08 December 2012 - 07:29 PM

My DS has just gone through this... he can crawl now so can get to whatever it is he is after. But used to just roll onto his tummy and get stuck or sit and grizzle at stuff.

Can you put him in his high chair in the kitchen while you wash up/cook etc? Either with dinner/lunch (if he's happy to munch on finger food or a rusk) or some toys clipped on to the tray?

Am sure he will be over it as soon as life becomes a little less frustrating!

#12 Phoenix Blue

Posted 08 December 2012 - 08:43 PM

My DD is the same age and also going through the same frustrations. She is not sitting or crawling yet either but has just learnt to roll. I remember my DS1 going through this stage so am well prepared! wink.gif

All the PP suggestions are great.  I have a variety of 'stations' that I rotate her through. Mat on the floor with toys, high chair, activity seat thingy, jolly jumper. I take her with me to hang out the washing, or even go to the toilet. Change of scenery and all that original.gif

It is painful, but it is short lived.  In a couple of weeks or so, they'll be crawling or wriggling everywhere and it's a whole new set of problems!

#13 WinterIsComing

Posted 08 December 2012 - 09:05 PM

QUOTE (MsN @ 08/12/2012, 07:49 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Classic seven month old behaviour. "I want to move but can't".

On baby number 2 now - I just leave him to whine. This too will pass OP.

Wrap your presents. Give him some paper to scrunch while you do it. And block out the whining as much as you can!

It's hardly whining, the baby is trying to involve the mother/caregiver in achieving their objectives - move me closer to the toy, flip me back onto my back/tummy etc!

Ignoring the baby is not the best advice. If they are learning how to get where they need with the help of others, it needs to be encouraged.

OP, my son was horrendously demanding after he learnt to roll over, until crawling. As soon as he was able to move independently, a lot of frustration disappeared. He is walking now and I am finding him a breeze! He is too focussed on hi physicality.

#14 kay11

Posted 08 December 2012 - 09:17 PM

QUOTE (misse10 @ 07/12/2012, 04:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Is this just what being a mum is & i should just deal with it? Or does the needing me all the time thing ever pass? Or at least the whinging?!

It was for me. It really did my head in. My first didn't get going at all until she walked at 12 months - it was 5 months of whingeing and helping her get around and keeping her amused.

Luckily for my second it was only a few weeks before he took off.

#15 Fright bat

Posted 08 December 2012 - 09:41 PM

QUOTE (WinterIsComing @ 08/12/2012, 10:05 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
It's hardly whining, the baby is trying to involve the mother/caregiver in achieving their objectives - move me closer to the toy, flip me back onto my back/tummy etc!

Ignoring the baby is not the best advice. If they are learning how to get where they need with the help of others, it needs to be encouraged.

There is quite a lot of evidence that babies who learn to achieve physical milestones without being positioned by others actually move better and are safer than kids who are helped all the time. Babies need room and space to work out how their bodies work. Getting frustrated is a normal part of this process. They don't need you to roll them over, they don't need artificial sitting aids, they don't need you movjng their feet to show them how to walk, they don't need you showing them YOUR way of managing steps and stairs etc. They just need a parent or carer nearby to 'spot' and provide verbal encouragement.

If you react every time your baby whines in frustration, you are teaching them that they can't solve their own problem, that they need your distraction, and that they need you to 'save' them. I'm not suggesting ignoring a distressed child, but I personally think that giving even 7 month olds space to work out their world is important. The reward is the amazing look of pride they get when they finally achieve what they've been trying so hard to do. You'd be surprised how quickly babies and children learn to work through their frustrations and achieve their objectives all by themselves.

So I think it's pretty crappy advice to always respond to whining by moving a toy closer or rolling them over yourself.

Edited by MsN, 08 December 2012 - 09:48 PM.

#16 MeN3Ps!

Posted 09 December 2012 - 05:13 PM

Hey OP,

OMG I could have written this word for word! This is what my DS is like. He is now 9 months old.

My DD, his twin sister is fine and will happily play and amuse herself, but the boy needs 100% of my attention and I cannot find the time to cook or do anything. He whinges ALL THE DAMN DAY!

Help! When do they grow out of this?? I feel your pain OP, I really do!

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