Jump to content

Facebook photos showing unsafe cots/bassinets


  • Please log in to reply
67 replies to this topic

#1 umop-apisdn

Posted 06 December 2012 - 09:55 PM

I came across some photos on an acquaintance's facebook page of their very young baby, sleeping in a cot and bassinet that is setup against what the recommendations are for safe sleeping. The baby is sleeping on a sheepskin rug in a bassinet and the cot has a plush play mat on the mattress and soft toys near the baby.

I'm not friends with this person, so I can't exactly let them know, but it does worry me  sad.gif . If I knew this person I would definitely try to approach them about it to find if they know what the recommendations are for cots and bassinets, but because I don't have anything to do with this person, that isn't an option.

So if you saw facebook photos of unsafe cots and bassinets, would you talk to the parent about it? Or would you keep your opinions to yourself?

#2 Rainbow Brite

Posted 06 December 2012 - 09:56 PM

It really is none of your business sad.gif

Like you said you don't know them.

#3 Unatheowl

Posted 06 December 2012 - 09:57 PM

Keep my opinions to myself.  You have absolutely no idea what the circumstances of the photo were.

#4 Feral_Pooks

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:02 PM

Sometimes people pose babies on these sorts of things for the look of it, rather than actually sleeping them in that environment. I took some photos of DS sleeping with some plush toys that people gave as presents, as a thank you. I would never have let him sleep with them normally and moved them as soon as the photo was taken. Do you think that is possible in this case? Sheesh, I posted some on FB too. I also had photos of him sleeping in his carseat and swing and got a few comments from people about that which really rubbed me the wrong way because he had reflux and just didn't otherwise sleep for a while there.

#5 LenaK

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:03 PM

QUOTE (Unatheowl @ 06/12/2012, 10:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Keep my opinions to myself.  You have absolutely no idea what the circumstances of the photo were.



This

#6 Dylan's Mummy

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:17 PM

Is the person on your friend list or your friend's friend (you know how anything our friends "like" come up)? If it's a friend of a friend you could let your friend know that it isn't safe. If it's someone on your friend list you could just send them a message and perhaps include a link to the SIDS website with the correct guidelines.

#7 Unatheowl

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:17 PM

QUOTE (Madame Catty @ 06/12/2012, 11:07 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Why "this"?

I'm sure the OP wasn't going to send the woman an abusive message accusing her of child abuse.  I would want to know if I was doing something that could endanger my child's life.  I know someone who did sleep their baby on a sheep skin and only stopped when the MCHN said it was dangerous.  Not everyone knows the guidelines.


Was this post really necessary?  You're entitled to your opinion as are others here. Are you gĂ´ing to take issue with everyone who doesn't agree with you?

#8 steffijade81

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:29 PM

I agree its none of your business really. You don't know the reasons behind the way people choose to sleep their babies a certain way and I think you would offend anyone by saying so. I know of babies that have only been able to sleep in prams, rockers, swings, carseats even one on a baby beanbag and never in a bassinet cot. I know the guidelines are there for safe sleeping but they are just that guidelines. It is up to the parent how to raise their child. I understand your worry but think it's one of those things you just keep to yourself. Obviously different if you see a child is being abused or mistreated but this is hardly the case.

#9 epl0822

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:31 PM

My friend had a cot set up with soft toys and bumper and duvet for her newborn. I recently attended a parenting course which included SIDS info so I simply shared this with her. She said she thought it was fine and wanted to leave the cot the way it was so I repected that. Her DS is a toddler and completely fine, obviously did not have SIDS or any other health problems.

Your Facebook friends didn't display a picture of themselves dangling their newborn on the 12th floor balcony. It is a bassinet! Their set up may have a higher likelihood of SIDS but it doesn't exactly pose a huge danger. If you were close enough to say something, you could possibly tell them in a very polite and friendly way. But if you are simply Facebook buddies, it does not justify you interfering. One of my friends had a photo of her baby sucking a dummy and somebody posted a long comment about the dangers of dummies. Honestly, that person came off sounding like a judgmental busybody.

#10 Starletta

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:32 PM

MC you have the cranks tonight!

FWIW OP I would say something to the mutual friend first, to see if they felt up to mentioning it. Otherwise I'd end up doing it. But I'm so freakin paranoid about SIDS that most other mothers think I'm nuts anyway.

#11 Kitty Fantastico

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:37 PM

Are you sure the baby was asleep? I put photos up when DS was a tiny baby, in his cot with stuffed toys, but I didn't actually sleep him in there. It was more to show how tiny he was in his big cot.

A few days ago I saw photos of a toddler sitting on his father's lap in the car, holding onto the wheel, neither of them wearing seatbelts. I think the car was stationary, at least I assume it was. A photo doesn't necessariliy show the whole story. I'd stay out of it personally, but if you're really worried, you could mention it to your common friend and see if they think there's reason to be worried.

#12 Guest_Sunnycat_*

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:39 PM

I don't think there is anything wrong with gently saying something. I'm actually surprised how many of my friends aren't aware of SIDS risks and other modern day no-nos.

#13 Born Slippy

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:49 PM

QUOTE (Sunnycat @ 06/12/2012, 11:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I don't think there is anything wrong with gently saying something. I'm actually surprised how many of my friends aren't aware of SIDS risks and other modern day no-nos.


This. And it really surprises me how this happens, given how much information I received via antenatal classes (and the associated pamphlets and booklets), in my postnatal stay (and the associated pamphlets and booklets), in our home visits from the MCHN who checked DD's sleeping arrangements for SIDS safety and our later MCHN appointments (and the associated pamphlets and booklets, again). SIDS information was also available in any parenting book I read.

Perhaps my experience isn't typical though?

#14 FeralLIfeHacker

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:59 PM

QUOTE (Sunnycat @ 06/12/2012, 11:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I don't think there is anything wrong with gently saying something. I'm actually surprised how many of my friends aren't aware of SIDS risks and other modern day no-nos.


This. I think as long as it comes from a good place ie - just trying to get awareness out there rather than "I am so much better than you at parenting" then I don't think there is anything wrong with pointing it out.
I guess if you did though you would be opening yourself up to someone thinking you were being a bit nosey but if it educated someone else reading then that's a good thing.

#15 FeralPerthFembo

Posted 06 December 2012 - 11:04 PM

I have been in this situation a few times and no I don't say anything. It's not my business what risks they are comfortable taking with their own child.

SIDS awareness is constantly pushed on parents these days. You are giving pamphlets all through pregnancy, its at the antenatal classes, the midwives go over it with you several times. I dont believe any of the people on my fb list are not aware of the recommendations.

If they choose not to follow it, I don't think a message from a friend telling them they are doing the "wrong" thing is going to change their mind.

#16 erindiv

Posted 06 December 2012 - 11:08 PM

It really is none of your business and as PP have said, it might have been a 'posed' photo. I have seen people jokingly post pictures of babies holding coke cans and the like, doesn't mean they were having a swig..

#17 feralangel

Posted 06 December 2012 - 11:22 PM

QUOTE (Starletta @ 06/12/2012, 11:32 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
But I'm so freakin paranoid about SIDS that most other mothers think I'm nuts anyway.


Nothing wrong with being freakin paranoid about SIDS.  My sister died of SIDS - she was exactly 3 months old.

OP, if you are that concerned, send the person a PM and preface it with, "I know it's none of my business.  . . " "I don't wish to be offensive . . " "please don't take this the wrong way..." or something similar.



#18 Feral_Pooks

Posted 07 December 2012 - 08:19 AM

Would you comment on a photo of co-sleeping? That's against SIDS guidelines too.

#19 ubermum

Posted 07 December 2012 - 08:41 AM

Team Madam Catty.

I would have to gently say something. If I didn't and something went wrong, I couldn't forgive myself.

#20 la di dah

Posted 07 December 2012 - 08:44 AM

If there was a die-cast toy truck or wood blocks or giant flower hat Anne Geddes-style in the crib I'd assume that was posed and not worry about it.

A sheepskin, well, I don't know what they're for, actually* but I'd think it wasn't outside the realm of possibility the baby really does sleep on it sometimes. So I might send an apologetic PM that I just saw a thing on that...

But I wouldn't post anything on the picture itself, I can't imagine anyone would appreciate that.

*Not a thing where I'm from, but crib bumpers are and they're just as bad.

#21 Carmen02

Posted 07 December 2012 - 08:48 AM

to be honest i wouldnt say anything, its none of my business and would just assume it was a posing picture anyway! SIDS recommdations where shoved in front of my face for all 3 of my childrens birth its not hard to pay attention to it.

#22 WithSprinkles

Posted 07 December 2012 - 08:49 AM

To be honest, I think most parents are aware of the SIDS guidelines. Those who don't follow them generally choose to do so (and thus will most likely get annoyed by any perceived preaching). Also agree with PPs suggestion that maybe the photo has just been "set up".

If it is really playing on your mind, you would have to tread very delicately...maybe you could comment something along the lines of:

How cute!! He looks so content. My DD/nephew/child/whatever has a teddy just like that..but I'm way too paranoid about SIDS to let her sleep with it.

After all if it is someone you don't really know, you never have to see them again if they get offended.


#23 MrsLexiK

Posted 07 December 2012 - 09:00 AM

I wouldn't say anything as I would think it was just done for photos.

#24 PrincessPeach

Posted 07 December 2012 - 09:02 AM

BIL & SIL when they set up the cost for their firstborn had a heap of teddies & plus blankets in there.

They were using the cot as storage space really, becasue he slept in the bassinet & i know for a fact once he did go into the cot the teddies & quilts found new homes.

#25 Walkers

Posted 07 December 2012 - 09:12 AM

QUOTE (VanillaIcecream @ 07/12/2012, 09:49 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
To be honest, I think most parents are aware of the SIDS guidelines. Those who don't follow them generally choose to do so (and thus will most likely get annoyed by any perceived preaching). Also agree with PPs suggestion that maybe the photo has just been "set up".

I find it hard to believe parents would be clueless about SIDS guidelines.
Isn't it routine now for the baby's sleep area to be checked during one of the early home visits by Maternal & Child Health?




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Natural pain relief in the early stages of labour

While managing labour pains on your own can be daunting, there are a number of natural pain relief options to help you cope until you are admitted to hospital.

Chinese woman gives birth to quintuplets

After six years of trying for a baby, a couple’s dreams have come true many times over after the mum gave birth to quintuplets this week.

Five-year-old shoots nine-month-old brother dead

A nine-month-old baby boy died on Monday after he was shot in the head by his five-year-old brother in their grandfather's home.

'Is that baby yours?'

She is my daughter. I gave birth to her. I nurse her. But she doesn't have any of my genes.

Episiotomy in childbirth: not just 'a little snip'

Episiotomies have a place in maternity care – and can occasionally save lives – but should not be performed routinely.

Toddler aggression not caused by language delays after all: study

The logic was that children who don’t have the language to fully express themselves will lash out when they’re misunderstood. Not anymore.

Why we chose to adopt a child with Down sydrome

Everyone in foster care (and really in life) has something that makes them more vulnerable. We just know what our son's is.

Object of desire

Curvy mums make clever babies

Scientists appear to have discovered why women have evolved to have more curves than men – shapely thighs and bottoms lead to healthier babies.

'We'll make sure they know how much she loved them'

A first-time mum will never get to hold her four newborns, dying shortly after giving birth to the quadruplets.

The baby names NZ knocked back in 2014

A New Zealander has tried to name their baby Senior Constable but didn't get away with it - and numbering children is also a no-no.

How can you go into labour without knowing you're pregnant?

For most of us, the idea that a woman could carry a child to full-term without knowing she is pregnant is mind-boggling.

Will you get to the hospital in time?

Worrying your baby will be delivered by the roadside is a common concern for many mothers-to-be. So how likely are you to be caught short?

Video: Funny 'Lips Are Moving' parody just for mums

Meghan Trainor's song 'Lips Are Moving' was already a hit, but now it's been turned into a hilarious parody that is set to be very popular with frustrated mums everywhere.

Out with the clutter

Decluttering by the numbers: take the 30-day challenge

Forget the 5:2 diet - Twitter's 30-day declutter challenge will have your house back in shape in no time (well, a month).

Parents, don't be too hard on yourselves

We need to stop damning parents of today, and embrace their appetite for knowledge instead.

Is my baby normal?

There are chubby Buddha babies and there are thin, smaller babies. Neither are right or wrong, they are all 'normal'.

When an older sibling starts school

When one child goes to ‘big school’ and leaves the other behind, it can cause deep upset. Here's how to make the transition easier.

Stray cat saves abandoned baby

They say dogs are man's best friend, but one cat has proven felines can be just as devoted to their human companions.

How strangers are helping a mum's wish come true after her death

A mum of five, Liz Marquez wanted to breastfeed her premmie son for a year. So when she passed away suddenly, her friends - and strangers - stepped in to help.

Win an Octonauts prize pack

To celebrate the launch of Octonauts Live! Operation Reef Shield, a spectacular underwater adventure live on stage, we are giving away an amazing Octonauts prize pack to one lucky fan.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Stars help save choking babies

It's an important lesson to learn, but one that busy new mums and dads might overlook until it's too late.

New Girl star Zooey Deschanel pregnant

Actress Zooey Deschanel is expecting her first child with her producer boyfriend Jacob Pechenik.

16 times 'dad reflexes' saved the day

Of course, in some cases they may be the ones who actually got their child into a precarious position in the first place, but we'll ignore that for now.

Couple's 'non-traditional' pregnancy announcement goes viral

Knowing you are not the father of your pregnant wife's baby would usually indicate a rocky relationship ahead for traditional parents.

The trials and tribulations of identical triplet newborns

Pip Donnelly is still playing spot the difference with her newborn identical triplets, Isabelle, Georgina and Frankie.

Win an Octonauts prize pack

To celebrate the launch of Octonauts Live! Operation Reef Shield, a spectacular underwater adventure live on stage, we are giving away an amazing Octonauts prize pack to one lucky fan.

Earthquake baby thriving five years on

Jenny Alexis is lucky to be alive after spending four days buried in the rubble of the 2010 Haitian earthquake, but now she's a thriving five year old.

Please don't say I'm lucky because I was adopted

On the one hand I was having a regular life with friends and sports and sleepovers and school. But I was also always wondering: Did my mother love me? What was wrong with me?

An open letter to non-parents who offer advice on child-rearing

Kitty, when you’re the parent of my child you’re welcome to wade in with an opinion – but until then, I’d prefer you to have a supportive ear and a glass of wine ready.

Couple arrested over baby gun video

A US couple faces charges after investigators say they found mobile phone videos showing the woman's 12-month-old daughter putting a handgun in her mouth.

NSW Health dumps 10-year limit on frozen embryos

A 10-year time limit on storing frozen embryos that were created with donor sperm has been dropped by the NSW government.

How my happy-go-lucky husband became a monster

Sharan Nicholson-Rogers watched her husband change from a happy-go-lucky police officer into an unpredictable man prone to violent and emotional outbursts.

Dads-to-be experience hormonal changes, too

Dads-to-be experience hormonal changes in line with their pregnant partners, a new study shows.

'They were just doing their job': mum of toddler killed in police chase gone wrong

"They were just doing their job. I feel so sorry for them. It is all just too sad."

Miscarriages to be formally recognised by NSW government

Women who miscarry will be able to obtain an optional "recognition of loss" certificate as a formal recognition of their often heartbreaking loss.

Cafe cubby house 'too noisy' for neighbours

Teenage parties, domestic disputes, or raucous late night pubs are the things that usually come to mind when you think neighbourhood noise complaints.

Dad films baby playing with snake

Most parents would not consider a snake an appropriate playmate for their baby, but a US dad who filmed his daughter playing with a python has defended himself against criticism.

Clever breastfeeding products

Check out this range of products designed to help make your breastfeeding journey more enjoyable, manageable and convenient.

Win with The Boxtrolls

To celebrate the release of The Boxtrolls on 3D Blu-ray, DVD & Digital with UltraViolet, we're giving you the chance to win a Boxtroll stationary package and DVD.

 

School Term 1

Get after-school care sorted

Wait lists too long at OSHC? Use www.findababysitter.com.au to meet local nannies now.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.