Jump to content

Facebook photos showing unsafe cots/bassinets


  • Please log in to reply
79 replies to this topic

#1 Sail to the Moon

Posted 06 December 2012 - 09:55 PM

I came across some photos on an acquaintance's facebook page of their very young baby, sleeping in a cot and bassinet that is setup against what the recommendations are for safe sleeping. The baby is sleeping on a sheepskin rug in a bassinet and the cot has a plush play mat on the mattress and soft toys near the baby.

I'm not friends with this person, so I can't exactly let them know, but it does worry me  sad.gif . If I knew this person I would definitely try to approach them about it to find if they know what the recommendations are for cots and bassinets, but because I don't have anything to do with this person, that isn't an option.

So if you saw facebook photos of unsafe cots and bassinets, would you talk to the parent about it? Or would you keep your opinions to yourself?

#2 Rainbow Brite

Posted 06 December 2012 - 09:56 PM

It really is none of your business sad.gif

Like you said you don't know them.

#3 Unatheowl

Posted 06 December 2012 - 09:57 PM

Keep my opinions to myself.  You have absolutely no idea what the circumstances of the photo were.

#4 Feral_Pooks

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:02 PM

Sometimes people pose babies on these sorts of things for the look of it, rather than actually sleeping them in that environment. I took some photos of DS sleeping with some plush toys that people gave as presents, as a thank you. I would never have let him sleep with them normally and moved them as soon as the photo was taken. Do you think that is possible in this case? Sheesh, I posted some on FB too. I also had photos of him sleeping in his carseat and swing and got a few comments from people about that which really rubbed me the wrong way because he had reflux and just didn't otherwise sleep for a while there.

#5 LenaK

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:03 PM

QUOTE (Unatheowl @ 06/12/2012, 10:57 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Keep my opinions to myself.  You have absolutely no idea what the circumstances of the photo were.



This

#6 Cat People

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:05 PM

I would PM them saying something like "I'm sure you know this but being a big worry wart, I just thought I'd mention... blah"

#7 Cat People

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:07 PM

QUOTE (LenaK @ 06/12/2012, 10:03 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
This



Why "this"?

I'm sure the OP wasn't going to send the woman an abusive message accusing her of child abuse.  I would want to know if I was doing something that could endanger my child's life.  I know someone who did sleep their baby on a sheep skin and only stopped when the MCHN said it was dangerous.  Not everyone knows the guidelines.


#8 Dylan's Mummy

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:17 PM

Is the person on your friend list or your friend's friend (you know how anything our friends "like" come up)? If it's a friend of a friend you could let your friend know that it isn't safe. If it's someone on your friend list you could just send them a message and perhaps include a link to the SIDS website with the correct guidelines.

#9 Unatheowl

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:17 PM

QUOTE (Madame Catty @ 06/12/2012, 11:07 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Why "this"?

I'm sure the OP wasn't going to send the woman an abusive message accusing her of child abuse.  I would want to know if I was doing something that could endanger my child's life.  I know someone who did sleep their baby on a sheep skin and only stopped when the MCHN said it was dangerous.  Not everyone knows the guidelines.


Was this post really necessary?  You're entitled to your opinion as are others here. Are you gôing to take issue with everyone who doesn't agree with you?

#10 Cat People

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:27 PM

QUOTE (Unatheowl @ 06/12/2012, 10:17 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Was this post really necessary?  You're entitled to your opinion as are others here. Are you gôing to take issue with everyone who doesn't agree with you?



Was my post to you?  No.  

I'm curious why someone wouldn't say anything.  I purposefully did not ask you because you have stinky attitude towards me and I knew you would take it personally.

#11 steffijade81

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:29 PM

I agree its none of your business really. You don't know the reasons behind the way people choose to sleep their babies a certain way and I think you would offend anyone by saying so. I know of babies that have only been able to sleep in prams, rockers, swings, carseats even one on a baby beanbag and never in a bassinet cot. I know the guidelines are there for safe sleeping but they are just that guidelines. It is up to the parent how to raise their child. I understand your worry but think it's one of those things you just keep to yourself. Obviously different if you see a child is being abused or mistreated but this is hardly the case.

#12 epl0822

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:31 PM

My friend had a cot set up with soft toys and bumper and duvet for her newborn. I recently attended a parenting course which included SIDS info so I simply shared this with her. She said she thought it was fine and wanted to leave the cot the way it was so I repected that. Her DS is a toddler and completely fine, obviously did not have SIDS or any other health problems.

Your Facebook friends didn't display a picture of themselves dangling their newborn on the 12th floor balcony. It is a bassinet! Their set up may have a higher likelihood of SIDS but it doesn't exactly pose a huge danger. If you were close enough to say something, you could possibly tell them in a very polite and friendly way. But if you are simply Facebook buddies, it does not justify you interfering. One of my friends had a photo of her baby sucking a dummy and somebody posted a long comment about the dangers of dummies. Honestly, that person came off sounding like a judgmental busybody.

#13 Starletta

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:32 PM

MC you have the cranks tonight!

FWIW OP I would say something to the mutual friend first, to see if they felt up to mentioning it. Otherwise I'd end up doing it. But I'm so freakin paranoid about SIDS that most other mothers think I'm nuts anyway.

#14 Kitty Fantastico

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:37 PM

Are you sure the baby was asleep? I put photos up when DS was a tiny baby, in his cot with stuffed toys, but I didn't actually sleep him in there. It was more to show how tiny he was in his big cot.

A few days ago I saw photos of a toddler sitting on his father's lap in the car, holding onto the wheel, neither of them wearing seatbelts. I think the car was stationary, at least I assume it was. A photo doesn't necessariliy show the whole story. I'd stay out of it personally, but if you're really worried, you could mention it to your common friend and see if they think there's reason to be worried.

#15 Guest_Sunnycat_*

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:39 PM

I don't think there is anything wrong with gently saying something. I'm actually surprised how many of my friends aren't aware of SIDS risks and other modern day no-nos.

#16 Born Slippy

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:49 PM

QUOTE (Sunnycat @ 06/12/2012, 11:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I don't think there is anything wrong with gently saying something. I'm actually surprised how many of my friends aren't aware of SIDS risks and other modern day no-nos.


This. And it really surprises me how this happens, given how much information I received via antenatal classes (and the associated pamphlets and booklets), in my postnatal stay (and the associated pamphlets and booklets), in our home visits from the MCHN who checked DD's sleeping arrangements for SIDS safety and our later MCHN appointments (and the associated pamphlets and booklets, again). SIDS information was also available in any parenting book I read.

Perhaps my experience isn't typical though?

#17 FeralLIfeHacker

Posted 06 December 2012 - 10:59 PM

QUOTE (Sunnycat @ 06/12/2012, 11:39 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I don't think there is anything wrong with gently saying something. I'm actually surprised how many of my friends aren't aware of SIDS risks and other modern day no-nos.


This. I think as long as it comes from a good place ie - just trying to get awareness out there rather than "I am so much better than you at parenting" then I don't think there is anything wrong with pointing it out.
I guess if you did though you would be opening yourself up to someone thinking you were being a bit nosey but if it educated someone else reading then that's a good thing.

#18 FeralPerthFembo

Posted 06 December 2012 - 11:04 PM

I have been in this situation a few times and no I don't say anything. It's not my business what risks they are comfortable taking with their own child.

SIDS awareness is constantly pushed on parents these days. You are giving pamphlets all through pregnancy, its at the antenatal classes, the midwives go over it with you several times. I dont believe any of the people on my fb list are not aware of the recommendations.

If they choose not to follow it, I don't think a message from a friend telling them they are doing the "wrong" thing is going to change their mind.

#19 erindiv

Posted 06 December 2012 - 11:08 PM

It really is none of your business and as PP have said, it might have been a 'posed' photo. I have seen people jokingly post pictures of babies holding coke cans and the like, doesn't mean they were having a swig..

#20 feralangel

Posted 06 December 2012 - 11:22 PM

QUOTE (Starletta @ 06/12/2012, 11:32 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
But I'm so freakin paranoid about SIDS that most other mothers think I'm nuts anyway.


Nothing wrong with being freakin paranoid about SIDS.  My sister died of SIDS - she was exactly 3 months old.

OP, if you are that concerned, send the person a PM and preface it with, "I know it's none of my business.  . . " "I don't wish to be offensive . . " "please don't take this the wrong way..." or something similar.



#21 Cat People

Posted 07 December 2012 - 07:57 AM

I'm really surprised at the people who say it's not your business.  Taken to the extreme, everyone was "minding their own business" when they saw Daniel Morcombe being kidnapped.

Isn't child safety everyone's business?

It surprises me too that people don't know the guidelines, but for whatever reason, some don't (like in my example).

I would rather risk offending someone than saying nothing and something dreadful happens.  I know the chance is very slim but why take a chance at all?  Saying something at least clears up any misunderstanding.

And would people really get offended at a gently worded private message?

#22 Feral_Pooks

Posted 07 December 2012 - 08:19 AM

Would you comment on a photo of co-sleeping? That's against SIDS guidelines too.

#23 Cat People

Posted 07 December 2012 - 08:35 AM

QUOTE (Pooks_ @ 07/12/2012, 08:19 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Would you comment on a photo of co-sleeping? That's against SIDS guidelines too.




There is research and respected health professionals who believe the opposite.  Some cultures it is the norm and SIDS is rare yadda yadda.  

I don't know of any research, or any health professionals who say it's ok to have baby sleep on sheep skin, with soft toys.  Do you?


#24 ubermum

Posted 07 December 2012 - 08:41 AM

Team Madam Catty.

I would have to gently say something. If I didn't and something went wrong, I couldn't forgive myself.

#25 Cat People

Posted 07 December 2012 - 08:42 AM

This is what SIDS have to say on bed sharing -


QUOTE
Special note about bed-sharing
Many parents bring baby into bed to feed, cuddle and
settle their baby. In cultures across the world, including
Australia, many parents choose to share a bed with
their baby.
Sharing a sleep surface with a baby increases the risk
of SUDI in some circumstances.
Babies who are most at risk of sleeping accidents whilst
sharing a sleep surface are babies less than three
months of age, and babies born preterm or small for
gestational age (low birth weight).
Sharing a sleep surface with a baby must be
avoided in the following circumstances where:
• baby shares the sleep surface with a smoker
• care-giver is under the influence of alcohol or
drugs that cause sedation
• baby is premature, small when born, or less than
3 months of age
• care-giver is overly tired
• there is adult bedding, doonas or pillows that may
cover the infant
• baby could be trapped between the wall and bed,
fall out of bed or could be rolled on
• baby is sharing bed with other children or pets
• baby is placed to sleep on a sofa, beanbag,
waterbed or sagging mattressImportant considerations when choosing to share
a sleep surface with a baby:
1. Babies are at greatest risk if they sleep on their
tummies or sides and if their faces become covered.
Taking measures to prevent these situations will
reduce the risk of SUDI
2. Make sure the mattress is firm and the bedding
cannot cover the baby’s face
3. Make sure soft items such as pillows, doonas,
lambswool and soft toys are not in the baby’s
sleep environment
4. Ensure baby is not wrapped if bedsharing
5. Place baby at the side of one care-giver and not
between two care-givers as this increases the
likelihood of the baby’s head becoming covered
or baby slipping underneath adult bedding
6. Ensure the baby is not close to the edge of the
bed to prevent falling
7. Do not place pillows at the side of the baby to prevent
rolling off; a safer alternative is to place the adult
mattress on the floor. Pushing the bed against the
wall can be hazardous; babies have died when they
became trapped between the bed and the wall
8. As an alternative to bedding, a safe sleeping bag may
be used without bedding so that the baby does not
share the adult bedding


Not against the guidelines, just done with precaution.  If I saw a mum in bed with a young baby, smoking and the bed full of doonas and pillows, yes I would say something.

Again I ask, would someone really get offended by a gently worded message?  Like in pp's examples?




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Win $1000 with Sea-Band

Three lucky fans can win a Sea-Band prize pack valued at over $1000 each, which includes two Sea-Bands plus a $1000 Eftpos gift card!

Misery loves Facebook

Facebook users are often criticised for only showing the positive, fun parts of their lives. But what about when it swings the other way, when someone uses it for the purposes of ranting about their children all the time, never posting anything positive?

Toddler's adorable impersonation of pregnant mum

Little Ellis has noticed his mum is walking differently lately, and his impersonation of her is hilarious.

'Forgotten baby syndrome' can happen to any one of us

When my third child was two months old, I strapped her into her car seat, then promptly forgot all about her. But she survived, unharmed, because it was winter, and I was lucky.

Join the Real Mums Test Drive Team

Five mums or mums-to-be will join the EB Test Drive Team and discover great items at an exclusive Big W event. (Sydney only.)

Ten things I've learned about motherhood

Never take a good night's sleep for granted. There is no logic like toddler logic. Standing on Lego hurts every time. These are the truths of parenthood.

Parenting past the toddler years: what's next?

Your baby has grown into a toddler, and now your toddler is fast approaching the preschooler stage. What can you expect as a parent?

Tips on what to pack in your hospital bag

Before giving birth I read countless lists, ended up overpacking just a little, and now know what I'll actually want to pack next time.

New app keeps tabs on your kids at childcare

Popular new technology lets parents know what their children are up to at childcare - but not everyone is a fan.

21 things I love about newborns

There?s an irresistible magic about newborns. Of course they're not all smiles and rainbows, but they are undeniably cute and remarkable in so, so many ways.

Kid-friendly hairdressers: who says haircuts can?t be fun?

I?ve found some salons who boast setups ideal for children ? you name it, they?ve thought of it. All are designed to make haircuts fun rather than stressful.

Labour pain relief may reduce risk of postnatal depression: study

Postnatal depression is a complex condition, but researchers say pain relief during labour may help some women.

Why we need better support for men after miscarriage

In a recent study, 85 per cent of men admitted feeling sadness after their partner miscarried, but almost half said they didn't share their feelings at all. What can be done to help them?

Mum in business: Kristy Chong

Kristy Chong is the managing director of Australian-made Modibodi underwear and a mum to Lucas, 6, Jason, 4, and Isaac, 6 months. She shares her advice for other mums thinking about starting their own businesses.

From toddler to preschooler: a developmental roadmap

So your toddler is growing up and will soon be entering the preschooler years. Here are a few ways to frame their development that will help you understand what?s going in those beautiful, funny, clever little heads of theirs.

Mum sacrifices an eye for her unborn baby

Motherhood is full of sacrifices, but this woman has made a life-altering one - and her baby hasn't even been born.

A grandparent by any other name

A growing number of grandparents are shunning tradition and going against conventional names - but a grandparent by any other name still gives the same awesome cuddles and kisses.

Photographer captures the beauty of adoption

The love of a family is usually tough to capture on camera. This is an exception.

When labour just doesn't happen

After three healthy kids, I can?t help feeling I?ve been a little ripped off. I missed out on something I had always wanted to experience, and now I?ll never get the chance.

Be careful what you say, your baby is listening

The importance of speaking to your baby even if they are not old enough to answer back has been highlighted by new research.

Share the little things that make you smile

We're giving away a Mountain Buggy nano, the ultimate travel stroller - and here are some of the great entries so far.

Win a Mountain Buggy nano

We?re giving away the new Mountain Buggy Nano - the lightweight travel buggy! So show us the little things that make you smile for your chance to win.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Win a Mountain Buggy nano

We?re giving away the new Mountain Buggy Nano - the lightweight travel buggy! So show us the little things that make you smile for your chance to win.

Be careful what you say, your baby is listening

The importance of speaking to your baby even if they are not old enough to answer back has been highlighted by new research.

Win $1000 with Sea-Band

Three lucky fans can win a Sea-Band prize pack valued at over $1000 each, which includes two Sea-Bands plus a $1000 Eftpos gift card!

The beautiful moment a baby was born at the side of a road

It's not where she expected to give birth, but mum Corrine Cinatl is delighted that her daughter's roadside arrival was captured in a series of beautiful photos.

Doctor sings first Happy Birthday to newborns

His job is to deliver babies, but this US obstetrician also has a unique way of celebrating the miracle of life.

Join the Real Mums Test Drive Team

Five mums or mums-to-be will join the EB Test Drive Team and discover great items at an exclusive Big W event. (Sydney only.)

The Nappy Collective starts new drive

It's that time of year when the dedicated volunteers at The Nappy Collective do their bit to help out mums and children in need - and they need your help.

Baby shower cake wrecks

From misshapen cake babies to questionable text, from odd colour choices to internal organ recreation, these are the baby shower cakes that taste forgot.

Photographer captures the beauty of adoption

The love of a family is usually tough to capture on camera. This is an exception.

Pregnancy progression photo ideas

Want to record your pregnancy as your belly grows? Here are some creative, fun ideas for photo shoots along the way.

The myths and facts about "normal" breastfeeding

When it comes to successful breastfeeding, there is a wide variety to what is "normal", according to new research.

Tin can craft and DIY ideas

Got a few old formula, Milo or coffee cans around the house? Use these fantastic upcycling ideas to create items for around the house and yard.

Dads meet their newborn for the first time

Emotional photos of two fathers meeting their newborn son have resonated with viewers worldwide, attracting thousands of Facebook likes and shares.

Skin safety isn't just a summer worry

Lax about the slip slop slap with your kids as weather turns cooler? Here's a reminder as to why we have to remain vigilant for our children?s future health.

Personalised baby gifts

We've scoured the internet to find gorgeous personalised keepsakes and nursery decor to record baby name and dates. They make great gifts for christenings, name days and birthdays! (All prices in AU.)

Creative sleeping baby photoshoots

See how some parents and photographers have captured sleeping babies in unusual positions and using different props.

DIY kitchen and food hacks

DIY your way to a better kitchen and make cooking easier with our clever hacks. (Some content reproduced with permission from mashable.com.)

Winter warmers for babies and toddlers

Your baby or toddler will be nice and snug in these beautiful and fun winter pieces. Most are hand-made or knitted, and they're all designed to keep your little one toastie - and adorable!

 

Mind, body, beauty, life

Making time for me

We look at your wellbeing, covering health, relationships, beauty and fashion, mind and body.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.