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#1 travelmum

Posted 04 December 2012 - 07:52 PM

Hi all,

Just wondering what other people's reactions would be. I picked up my 11 month old from daycare and noticed in the book that no bottles had registered as being given to my DS today. I asked the room leader about this and she said that if any bottle had been given it would of been written down. I had dropped him off at 9 and was picking him up at 3.

This was his 3 time there. I had written a routine down as requested which stated that he would have a nap not long after getting there and then when he wakes from his nap he has a bottle and then up for about 2-2.5 hrs then another nap and another bottle and so on. I noticed in the book that he didnt nap until 12.45pm and that was for 3 hours and yet he didnt have any bottles.

Would you be concerned about this. Should i bring this up?

Thanks in advance

#2 ChunkyChook

Posted 04 December 2012 - 07:57 PM

I wouldn't imagine they had time to give him a bottle after his nap if you were supposed to pick him up at 3 but he didn't wake until 45 minutes after you got there. Or did they need to wake him when you got there?

#3 Banana Pancakes

Posted 04 December 2012 - 07:58 PM

I would definitely ask  original.gif  Just keep it friendly and remind them that he really does need his bottles after each nap.

#4 eachschoolholidays

Posted 04 December 2012 - 07:59 PM

I would probably ask about it tomorrow.  I would say he was given at least one bottle and it just wasn't written down.

The timings your give don't add up for me - are you sure you have all your information correct?  You say you picked him up at 3, but also say he didn't wake until 3.45??

#5 travelmum

Posted 04 December 2012 - 08:16 PM

Whoops I meant to say I picked him up at 5 not 3.

So he was there from 9-5pm

#6 Wigglemama

Posted 04 December 2012 - 08:17 PM

The only real issue here is that they didn't get him to sleep at he times you requested. You specified that he has bottles after a nap and according to your times, he woke after you arrived to pick him up.

Maybe they tried to get him down but couldn't. When babies start day care, it can be a bit unsettling, so chances are his pattern is a bit out...or perhaps he is starting to drop down to one sleep a day?

#7 *Finn*

Posted 04 December 2012 - 08:26 PM

We need more info. Has he just started at this childcare centre?

If he is just starting to get use to the centre I wouldn't be worried about the no bottle at all. Routines will always be a little out of whack till he is comfortable.

If he was 5 or 6 months old I would be concerned he did not have any milk but at 11 months I wouldn't be so worried.

#8 pundelina

Posted 04 December 2012 - 08:31 PM

QUOTE (travelmum @ 04/12/2012, 09:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Whoops I meant to say I picked him up at 5 not 3.

So he was there from 9-5pm

I really hope they gave him a bottle in those 8 hours and just didn't record it. I'd be having STRONG words with the centre. As for sleeps, you can't force a child to sleep, just offer the opportunity so I'd be less concerned about that and waaaay more concerned about fluid/food intake.

#9 Bek&H

Posted 04 December 2012 - 08:34 PM

I am a room leader of a nursery room.

What did they tell you about his day? did they try to get him to sleep at the time you suggested? Did they give you much information on how his day went?

In our room we have the bottles in the fridge in trays that have time slots (eg 9-10am), we have a whiteboard with the childrens names, then what time they have their bottle, sleep etc.......theres no way you couldn't know that a child was due for or hasn't had a bottle/nap?

Does the room leader know that you want to keep him in his routine? They may be keeping him up with the other older children in the room who are on one sleep who all go down after lunch.

#10 hollysmama

Posted 04 December 2012 - 08:41 PM

I too would be more concerned about him not having a bottle over his sleeping routine. I would say something, but like PP said, be friendly.

#11 ~~HappyMummy~~

Posted 04 December 2012 - 08:55 PM

I agree with some of the PPs - I think you're right to be concerned both about the sleeping and bottles so I'd have a friendly chat with the leader next time you drop him off.  What's the point in asking you for his routine if they don't even loosely follow it?

#12 lozoodle

Posted 05 December 2012 - 05:43 AM

At 11 months i wouldnt be worried, he would have had plenty to eat imsure and at that age it was really only a bottle on waking and after dinner anyway.

Also, daycare routine is a different world to your own. You can give your preferences but in reality they probably will just end up slotting in with the normal routine (unless they are a young baby of course).

#13 travelmum

Posted 05 December 2012 - 08:30 AM

Well we had an awful night with his sleeping and now he wont go down for his morning nap.

He only goes to daycare once a week so it won't be until next weeek that I am there. I already questioned the room leader when picking him up asking whether he had any bottles.

He went to sleep school a while back and they said he should only be awake for about 2.5-3 hours before he has a nap.....Yesterday he was awake for almost 6 hours and then only had 1 nap for the whole day.

Now I am getting the whole mother's guilt for sending him there in the first place

#14 Carmen02

Posted 05 December 2012 - 08:45 AM

dont feel guilty! to be honest i wouldnt be to worried about the no bottles his 11mths old my 3 only had 3 bottles at that age but you have your routine which they should stick to! I would be questioning it for sure even more and saying your not happy, my oldest went to daycare at that age and i found out she just wouldnt let anyone give her a bottle or she wouldnt hold it herself so she had no bottles then.

#15 mandala

Posted 05 December 2012 - 10:17 AM

Please don't feel guilty.

The daycare staff have mostly been pretty good about trying to do what I ask, but there have been times where it just hasn't worked out. Since I'm not in the room, I don't know what's been going on, but I try not to second guess their choices. If they have done something I would prefer they didn't, I ask them how he seemed to be about it and to go back to what I prefer. I've never had any problems when I've asked for them to do it my way. I've also rung up during the day to ask how he's going, whether he's slept, and how much of his EBM he's had. That's a good way to make sure they're doing what you want.

Some days DS has only had one nap, or only had two catnaps, and has been awake for far longer than I would have liked. However, I know that he's always having so much fun playing with the other kids that it would probably be very difficult for him to settle.  When he was on two daytime feeds, he would often just be having his last one when I went to pick him up at 5pm, because he'd slept through until just before lunch. It wasn't the way I would have done it, but it was okay. He certainly hadn't starved!

If it's just been your first day, give him a chance to settle in. It can be overwhelming and exciting and hard for them to sleep. DS was a bad sleeper for a long while, and we'd just been to sleep school before I started him one day a week in daycare. We found that the first day after a daycare day he was either too wired to sleep, or so exhausted he'd sleep longer. It took him a while to get used to both sleeping at daycare and to calm down for the next day. Now he's in two days a week, I've spaced them so he can catch up on missed sleep the next day.

Also, by 11 months, awake time is extending from 3 to 4 hours. So it's not quite as dire original.gif

So, lots of rambling there - but don't feel guilty, just ask for what you want, and I hope you get a better night tonight.

#16 Natttmumm

Posted 05 December 2012 - 10:26 AM

When DD1 first started daycare in a centre that was what kept happening to us. Turned out that my "routine" 2 sleeps and bottles didnt suit their "routine" which was one sleep and milk from a cup at 12 months. So they just nodded politely but never followed my instructions or bothered to explain why. After finding out DD1 fell asleep in the highchair and had been given the wrong food (she has an intolerance to cows milk so I packed her food). I pulled her out - she was there 2 weeks all up.

I moved her to a family daycare and never looked back.

I refuse to put my kids in a daycare centre under the age of 3 - just my opinion (no need to flame) from what I have seen. I love family daycare for that age group.

#17 Mummy Em

Posted 05 December 2012 - 10:42 AM

I'd give the centre co-ordinator a ring and ask her/him to follow it up and let you know what happened. They might have attempted to follow your routine but he was unsettled and not interested, or there may have been a communication breakdown where the info wasn't passed on to the worker caring for him, or perhaps they can't accommodate his routine in the room, in which case you need to be told this so you can decide whether to keep him there or move him.

#18 Tesseract

Posted 05 December 2012 - 10:44 AM

I wouldn't worry about an 11 month old having only one nap and/or no bottles. At daycare (particularly when they first start) he may have wanted to fall into the routine with the older children, may have been too excited to sleep etc. They also feed them so frequently that I wouldn't worry about him being hungry.

It's possible the written routine didn't get given to the room and you may need to tell them in person.

Also he is older now than when he went to sleep school, at some point he will drop his second nap and be up for longer won't he?

But those are specific issues.

What I WOULD be worried about is that you asked a pointed question to the room leader and this did not open a conversation about what was going on with your DS that day, in particular since he's just started. There are a million valid reasons why he didn't sleep/have bottles the way you said (they might have tried to get him down but he didn't, he might have wanted afternoon tea with the other kids instead etc etc) but this needs to be a conversation they have with you. But it also comes down to you, you need to ask. Daycare workers are doing a million things, looking after 4 babies at once (I get flustered looking after one!), if you don't specifically get their attention about something then it's likely their attention will be elsewhere.

Some parents don't want to know when their kid eats/sleeps/poops, others do. You need to ask specific questions and raise your concerns with the room leader. You asked her if he'd had any bottles, she answered that question by saying it was written in the book. Did you follow up with "there's nothing written here, why didn't he have a bottle when he woke from his nap? And also why was his nap so late?" If you asked that question and didn't get an adequate answer, then yes I'd be upset. But if you just left it then there was no opportunity for them to talk things through with you.

Spend a bit of time in the room, get to know the workers, talk with them. If you then feel good about the center, stay there and work it out. If you spend time with them and it feels 'off' or 'wrong' or 'not nice' then trust your instinct and pull him out.

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