Jump to content

Adopted a rescue dog
Question about children!


  • Please log in to reply
6 replies to this topic

#1 amberlee

Posted 26 November 2012 - 04:00 PM

On Friday we bought Stanley the 2 year old (?) maltese x poodle (?) from the shelter. Our main criteria were great with children (aged 4 and 22 months) and not yappy.

Well we haven't heard a woof out of him and he is so calm and gentle, and settled in really well. He plays really well with the children and even when the youngest one fell/stepped on him he just moved away calmly. Perfect I thought!

He wasn't interested in any new toys we got him, but he really took to one my mum bought him yesterday. The neice and nephew were also playing with him- grabbing the toy and throwing it. I could see he was getting sick of the throwing and just wanted to sit and chew it so I asked the kids to leave him alone. My neice went up to take it again and he growled. Into the toy, not really at her.  

Then this morning I was lying on the ground reading to 4 year old and he had his head resting on me. When my 22 month old walked over carrying a book he growled at her.

Now I'm worried that maybe he's not so trustworthy ? I haven't taken my eyes off him now when around the children. Or maybe he is just settling in, trying to find his 'place' in the family hierarchy and I should give him a chance to settle more?  Or is this 'normal' dog behaviour that even a non-agressive dog might demonstrate?

I'm aware of making sure he know's his 'place' in the family eg. not allowed up on beds and chairs, feeding him after we've been fed and making him sit while my 4 year old puts his food in the bowl etc.

Any tips / ideas etc?  Thanks!

Edited by amberlee, 26 November 2012 - 04:01 PM.


#2 morgansacre

Posted 26 November 2012 - 04:10 PM

Spikey is the one you want to read this and answer.

But it sounds to me that as you have only had him for the weekend, he is still trying to find his place in the family. If my dogs do something I don't approve of, like the growling, I use my growling voice and say a short sharp NO! He will learn this is unacceptable. Don't shout at him, as he won't understand what you want, but the growling voice is a warning they have gone to far.

It is going to take time and patience from all of you to sort this out. But he will get it.

Good luck.

Lynn

Edited by morgansacre, 26 November 2012 - 04:11 PM.


#3 FiveAus

Posted 26 November 2012 - 04:14 PM

The growl is a warning. Don't stop him from growling, or he might very well escalate to biting without warning. At least he's letting you know he's not happy about something. Contact the place you got him from and ask their advice.

#4 Feral*Spikey*

Posted 26 November 2012 - 08:25 PM

The first thing that I would say is that NO dog is 100% trustworthy around children.

Children don't understand dog cues - such as growling and signals to be left alone - which is why so many end up being bitten by the family pet (I'm thinking of my sister here many years ago, I was telling her not to blow in the dog's ear because he didn't like it, but she kept doing it - 6yo's are not the brightest, and three stitches later...). Your niece was given lots of clues no doubt, but ignored them and so was given the 'more serious' version of a warning. Be firm with the child, and provide the dog a place to escape from the tots. Crate training is likely to be a godsend in your family situation, please do it - it will also give your dog a place to hide from the kids when he's had enough fun and games.

So supervise all interactions and tell the children what the dog is doing to tell them they're being annoying. Education is important.

Next thing - by allowing the dog to be on you, you've given him a 'promotion' in the pecking order, so to speak. Without having been there, its hard to say, but there is a chance he thinks that he's higher that your 22 month old. This happens frequently, mostly because 22mo toddlers are not exactly together in the communication and mobility stakes. They are not 'in charge' of anything, so dogs can mistake that for being like a 'puppy', which is a reasonable (if incorrect) assumption. The dog might think he's 'alpha' to any puppy-thing.

What to do - dog on the floor at all times. Dogs do not sit on laps, nor are they invited for cuddles or to rest their body on you. Make sure your dog sees you carrying your toddler, and sees you rewarding the toddler BEFORE he gets anything. If you are on the floor, the dog can be beside you, but not on you (I say this, although my DH allows our youngest Elkhound to lounge all over him - but she doesn't do it to anyone else, its their 'thing').

Also teach the toddler to be in charge of handing our some sort of regular treat. My DD started giving our dogs their evening treat around that age, with my hands-on assistance (my big dog wouldn't take them from her otherwise).

Finally, he may be slightly 'possessive' of his things, including food and treats. This can be a problem if you don't address it, because there will come a time when he has something in his mouth that he cannot have, and you want him to hand it over without a fuss.

Usually, for toys and objects we use the 'give' command, and reward/swap a treat for the object. I'd suggest that you, and the kids play this training game. You should start until he gets the hang, then let the kids have a go at offer/swap, until he is happy to relinquish whatever it is he has in his mouth. Eventually, he'll work out that bringing things to you and dropping them might also be reward-worthy. wink.gif

#5 Feral*Spikey*

Posted 26 November 2012 - 08:27 PM

Oh, and get off to obedience training. It will make a world of difference, and really get him to understand his place in the world (plus it will reinforce the habit of doing what he's told - poodle's are too clever by half, and this can be a problem if they get bored).

#6 FiveAus

Posted 27 November 2012 - 05:11 AM

To the OP, learn to recognise the dogs "aversion" signals.......signs that the dog isn't comfortable with what's happening to him, or the environment he is in....and act quickly to change things (ie, remove the dog) before the growling starts.

They are easy to recognise.......yawning, and lip licking. As soon as he starts doing either of those things, it's a sign that he's unhappy. Change things for him. Pop him in a covered crate, or take him to a quiet room. And always be very aware of what's going on between him and the children.

#7 amberlee

Posted 27 November 2012 - 06:47 AM

Thank you so much for all the replies and advice. I know it is so true about getting the pecking order right and that is what we have to work on.  I learnt the hard way with my last dog- a pomeranian I allowed to be a princess but really she was a monster. Fortunately for most of her life we were child-free so it was only us that had to deal with her obnoxiousness!

So I am not going too stuff it up this time!




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

How to talk about your pregnancy at work

The workplace isn't always a friendly place for pregnant women. Yet working women inclined to conceal a pregnancy from prying coworkers may be better off opening up and carrying on, according to a new study.

Tell us your story to win!

To celebrate Mother's Day this year we are giving you the chance to win one of five great prizes simply by telling us your story.

Where to get help to help your baby sleep

There is so much pressure about having a baby who sleeps 'all night' , it's no wonder you worry about your baby if she wakes in the night.

Vintage baby names having a comeback

What makes some names have comebacks while others silently fade into oblivion? A few factors come into play.

When your partner doesn't want you to breastfeed

Dads can have many reasons for not wanting their partners to breastfeed their baby, but both parents should learn more about it before making a final decision.

Model mum Sarah Stage shares post-baby selfie

Most new mums would recoil at the thought, but Sarah Stage has shared a post-pregnancy selfie just four days after giving birth.

I'll admit it: I have last child parenting fatigue

If you're a new mum and feeling ignored by the older mum/the old hand/the has-been, please know, it's not you, it's me. Blame the last child parenting fatigue.

Exhaustion is not the same as tiredness

Having a new baby isn't tiring - it can be downright exhausting.

Five posterior babies, four home births

I was on a high. I'd done it all by myself with no help from anyone.

Mum's list of birthday gift demands goes viral

We're big fans of kids' birthday parties - but this is one bash we're glad we didn't get an invite to.

Kate Middleton to receive 'loyalty discount' for second birth

Everybody loves a bargain - including the Duchess of Cambridge.

Fish & chip shop owner's sad note goes viral

A lengthy note put on the window of a fish & chip shop has gone viral due to the writer's serious doubts about the romance of travel.

Pregnant women need good nutrition advice, not judgment

Pregnant women are under pressure to do all the "right things" to have a healthy child. It results in women feeling judged about their decisions.

When your child wants you to have another baby

Giving your child a sibling when you don't want to have another baby can be a complex issue.

William Tyrrell's mum speaks out: 'We hope he is still alive'

The mother of missing toddler William Tyrrell says she has a vision that somebody "picked him up and moved him on ... that's the only way ... to explain for him not to be there".

Family comes first for 23-year-old Tommy Connolly

Most 23-year-old blokes spend their hard earned cash on fun times with mates or romantic dinners with their girlfriend, but not Tommy Connolly.

Newborn all-girl quintuplets 'doing great'

The first all-female quintuplets born in the United States were delivered last week, at 28 weeks and two days.

Model mum's big baby silences critics

He may be less than a week old, but baby James Hunter has already helped his model mum silence her critics.

Jammy, Hula Hoop, Rage: Reddit reveals most unusual baby names

A recent Reddit thread has revealed some of the more creative names in the world.

Woman awakens from coma, learns she gave birth

A US woman awakened this week from a four-month-long coma that doctors had feared would be permanent and learned that she had given birth to a baby boy, according to her family.

'Give us a break': mum sent shocking letter over Facebook baby pics

Posting a lot of baby photos doesn't make you a bad person. It may make your Facebook feed a little irritating, but it doesn't make you a bad person.

In defense of the dads who do so much

It's time to shift the focus off what dads aren’t doing and shine it on what they are.

The modern cloth nappies too cute to cover up

If you're only just joining the modern cloth nappy movement, or would like to spruce up your collection, we have to introduce you to Designer Bums.

How breastfeeding can affect your libido

When you’ve just had a baby, having sex isn’t usually top priority. In fact, for a lot of women it rates about as appealing as changing another dirty nappy.

Should pregnant women be allowed to use 'parent and child' car parking spots?

Is it acceptable to use these car parking spots when pregnant? How many of us would admit to doing it?

Healthy baby from sperm taken 48 hours after a man died

Fertility doctors have described their "most extraordinary case" - creating a healthy baby from sperm taken 48 hours after a man had died.

Sign up to our 30 days of #PlayIQ challenge

Sign up to receive 30 amazing tips and ideas for play with baby during the month of April and submit a picture or tip on our social wall for a chance to win an amazing Fisher-Price prize pack.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Last chance to win a year's supply of toys

You have less than a week left to win your child one of five Fisher-Price toy packs valued at over $600 each - hurry, enter today!

Childcare is a big problem, but there's more to it

Let’s keep talking about these issues and not allow them to be put into a neat little box that’s labelled ‘Fix childcare and everything is solved’.

Pink's awesome response to body-shaming trolls

When trolls felt the need to comment on 35-year-old singer-songwriter Pink's weight, her answer was an awesome ode to body love.

Fertility clinic offers egg donors $5000

A national chain of fertility clinics is offering egg donors a $5000 payment to cover their expenses, a first for Australia which is raising concerns the money could act as an inducement.

Baby boy abandoned in India amid fresh surrogacy concerns

Australian officials could do nothing to stop an Australian couple from abandoning their baby son, born through surrogacy in India, after they decided they did not want to bring him to Australia.

Herd immunity and community responsibility: how free-riders can make kids suffer

Individual choice works for haircuts and handbags, but not for preventing infectious diseases that kill kids.

Photographer captures 'unexpected beauty' of birth

If there is one thing Leilani Rogers knows about childbirth, it is that no two deliveries are ever the same.

Expectations vs the reality of making a toddler's clothes

Note to self: less sewing, more life. Not the party dress, but the party. The toddler, as usual, has it all figured out.

Mum meets 'dead' daughter 49 years after birth

In 1965, Zella Jackson-Price was told her premature baby girl had died shortly after birth.

How pregnancy probiotics can help you and your baby

New research suggests that taking specific pregnancy probiotics could be the answer to a range of common pregnancy side effects.

53 creative pregnancy announcements

Announcing that you're expecting can be a time to express your creativity, sense of humour and imagination. Check out how other parents and parents-to-be have broken the news to friends and family.

IKEA hacks for the nursery and kids' rooms

Are you one of those that know the whole IKEA catalogue by heart? Love their stuff but want to personalise it? Here's some inspiration to help you realise the potential of IKEA furniture and fittings.

36 baby names inspired by food and drinks

A French court may have ruled out Nutella as a baby name, but that doesn't have to stop you from taking inspiration from the supermarket (or bottle shop). See what parents in the US have chosen for their delicious little ones.

 

ENTER NOW!

Win a year's worth of toys

Last week to submit a picture of your baby at play for your chance to win. Visit the Play Wall to view our recent entries.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.