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Sleep advice - 3 year old

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#1 *mylittleprince*

Posted 26 November 2012 - 03:22 PM

I'm hoping someone will have tips or advice on my sleep situation.

DS is 3 years and 3 months old.

He has had the same bedtime routine from 15 months. Dinner, bath, prayers, stories and sleep done by DH. I do it maybe once ever 2 weeks or so.

He goes down at 7:30pm and used to sleep until between 6 - 7am.

We used to put him into bed and he would fall asleep within 10 minutes. Now he is up sometimes till 8:30/9:30 which is far too late!

He is now sleeping 2 - 3 hours in the day and I'm not sure how to lessen his day sleep to increase his night sleep. He definately still needs a day sleep as by 12 he is very grumpy and whingy. I also have newborn twins so need him to have a rest so I can settle them too.

Should I wake him after 1 hour of day sleep?

#2 tick

Posted 26 November 2012 - 03:34 PM

I'd definitely be waking him after an hour or so of napping, and looking forward would be aiming to drop it all together if you want your evenings back!

He's ready for a nap at midday because he's up so late the night before IMO, one way or another you'll probably have a grumpy, tired kid while he gets used to something new but it'll be better in the long run.

My DD dropped her day nap just after she turned two and it was a difficult time for a few weeks but once she settled into an earlier bedtime and all of that, I really started to prefer it.  Asleep by 6:30 pm was just awesome!

#3 *Lena*

Posted 26 November 2012 - 03:34 PM

I would try waking him after 1.5  hours and pushing his bedtime back till 8pm. Although in saying that my children have never went to bed before 8.30 and I know majority of people put their children to bed much earlier then me. At your sons age my first son started having rest every 2nd day but I understand you wanting your rest time with twins. On the day he didn't have a sleep he had to lay in his bed and read a book or some time I would put a movie on for him and he wasn't to come out until the movie was over.

That is just my opinion though, You know your son the best.

Edited by *Lena*, 26 November 2012 - 03:35 PM.

#4 KBM

Posted 26 November 2012 - 03:38 PM

Youve hit that horrible stage of needing a day sleep but then not going to bed until midnight!  I remember when my first child was driving me nuts with it, DH was working away and I was getting really upset and frustrated that DD wouldnt go to bed /sleep at 8 pm.  That was MY time, I needed to have my dinner and my relax time but there she was, calling for me from her room for hours on end (it felt like!).

DH rang me one night and asked why I was so upset, he just said simply 'if she wont go to sleep, let her stay up'.  So I did, I stopped fighting it and let her stay up that night and crash when she needed to.  DH rang back at about 10pm and she was still awake, just.  But I realised that if your not tired, your not tired.

So you need to weigh it up, is DS's sleep during the day more valuable to you, or the time in the evening with him in bed more valuable?  Eventually he will need to drop the day sleep but this will happen in time and yes, you will have a tired, horrible, cranky monster on your hands for a few weeks until he gets more used to it but he will, its just part of getting older and needing less sleep.

My youngest is 2y7 mo and he usually has a day sleep of 2 hours, then bed by 8-8.30.  But some days he doesnt have his day sleep (I dont make him, if hes happy playing then I let him) and then he'll be in bed by (at the latest) 7pm.

You can try waking him after only an hour, might work for you but my kids hated it, made them more cranky than they were before their sleep.  What I would do is try to delay his nap till slightly later in the day, start slowly 15 mins here and there.  This will encourage him to learn how to be awake and happy for longer periods of time, with the end goal being no sleep at all (and a nice early bedtime!, except in my house, that always means a nice early morning too at 5.30!).

Good luck, its hard with young ones to contend with too.

#5 BearBait

Posted 26 November 2012 - 03:45 PM

Same problem here with DD2.5yo. Have a 4m old as well, seems that behaviour, sleep everything has become a struggle since new baby arrived.

#6 ~ppp~

Posted 26 November 2012 - 03:50 PM

wevhad the opposite problem with waking early (4:30am) due to too long a day sleep (2yr old doing 3.5hr day nap, simetimes 4hrs). we started waking him at 2.5hrs and he was cranky in the avos for a few days, but soon sleeping in till 6am each morning.

if you look at their total required sleep at that age its 13hrs (or maybe less at 2.5yrs, i looked into it fir a 2yr old).  so if they are having a long day nap then the night time sleep has to shorten one way or the other.

for us it was a no brainer - id far rather a cranky kid in the avo thsn be up at 4:30am, so we chose to shorten his day nap. as a PP saud you need to choose which time you woud rather him be sleeping.

and the first few days will be v cranky afternoons so mayb start on a weekend so u have hubby to help

i still have to wake my son everyday but he is always upnon the dot of 6am.

#7 EBeditor

Posted 26 November 2012 - 03:51 PM

I would drop his day sleep to an hour or so. Maybe do it gradually - wake him up 15 mins earlier each day for a few days.

I have a DD about the same age and she can be up to 9pm if she even has a 30 min  nap.

#8 winkywonkeydonkey

Posted 26 November 2012 - 04:03 PM

Yep his day sleep is way too long . I remember having to make sure my ds was awake by 1pm or he would be awake until 10pm .

Just let him sleep for an hour and then keep him busy in the afternoon to wear him out. Usually takes a few weeks to get used to the smaller day sleep .

#9 Natttmumm

Posted 27 November 2012 - 10:25 AM

We have had the same problem with DD2 for a while now. She needs a day sleep by 12 (hysterical). But then she stays up until around 8:30pm which is late for us as her sister goes to sleep by 7pm (no day sleep). We have managed to solve the battles though and find a way we can all be happy!

We now put her to bed at 7pm and let her play in her room quietly - she has toys in there and drawing things. We used to get annoyed and keep saying "go to sleep" etc which ended in meltdowns and us yelling at her. We just leave her to it now. She knows she cant come out unless she needs the toilet (her door is open). Some nights she is awake until 9pm but she is in her room playing so i still get my down time in a way. As a general rule I put her down for a day nap at 12 and I sort of wake her around 2ish if she is still asleep. My biggest issue is daycare days where I know she sleeps later like 1:30 to 3:30 - 4pm and those are my hardest nights. I have tried to change this with the daycare but Im sure it still happens as those nigths are our worst.

Could you try to change the rules - stay in your room but you can play until you are tired. If it gets to 9pm and shes still playing I do go in a tuck her inand tell her she has to go to sleep - most days shes out by about 8:30 and up at 6:15am- I can live with that

Other alternative is to cut the sleep - but it hasnt worked for us as it backfires and she falls asleep on the lounge at 4pm and had a meltdown when I wake her up that goes on for ages

#10 *mylittleprince*

Posted 28 November 2012 - 07:29 AM

Thanks everyone for the advice. He only slept 20 minutes yesterday as he fell asleep in the car on the way home and then woke up when we got home. He was fine the whole afternoon - no tantrums or grumpiness and went down great last night. We also left him in his room instead of going in a million times to say go to sleep. We were busy putting the twins down which is maybe a good thing. He slept well, didn't wake up and come to us (which he sometimes does), slept till 6am and woke up happy.

So we'll definately stick to the 1 hour day sleep and letting him sleep at night in his own time.

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