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What are good reasons to have baby number 5?
10 replies to this topic
Posted 26 November 2012 - 01:12 PM
DH and I agreed that 4 kids would be our thing. 1 and 2 came along in good time, number 3 came along a bit sooner than anticipated, so we left a bit bigger gap for number 4. All through that pregnancy, I said I was fine with being done. I don't know now whether I was talking myself into it, or whether it really felt that way at the time.
Anyway, I'm sure many of you have felt that feeling when you hold you're baby in those first moments and think "Oh! I can't not ever do this again!". DH was pretty keen to stick to the plan of 4, but in the early days, he did entertain the idea of #5, with this slowly changing as #4 got bigger. In the lead up to DS2 turning 2, DH was adamant no more, and every time I teasingly bought it up, I was shot down in flames.
I have said all along, that I will probably feel clucky forever, no matter how many children we have, but that I would love one more. And have also said, that I respect DH's choice not to have one. So imagine my surprise when he sat me down over the weekend and asked me to think long and hard on why I want another and then we can discuss it further!
The only thing is, I cannot come up with any really good logical reasons to have another child, it's really only what my heart wants, there's many more reasons NOT to have another.
I realise that we still probably won't end up having #5, but it has meant to the world to me that DH wants to at least have a proper discussion about it. He even said that it does't sit right with him that he gets the final say in the matter just because he doesn't have the same burning desire to have another that I do.
Anyway, what has your baby/child #5 brought to your family that's made it all worthwhile?
Posted 27 November 2012 - 08:08 AM
I will preface this by saying I did always want five, we did decide at one stage to stop at 4 but then after long deliberation we had our fifth child.
He is an utter and complete delight. The older kids adore him. I always thought I would always want another 'baby' but I have zero desire to have more children. He's nearly four now and every day I look at him and know he was meant to be here
Posted 27 November 2012 - 12:27 PM
When we decided to have #5 there were more cons than pros when we really thought about it!! So no, sorry I can't help you find a "logical" reason for doing it!
I can say, at the risk of sounding very cliched, that I don't believe we regret the children we do have, but could easily regret those we don't!
We've just had #6, he's almost 9 weeks now.
And that is it for us!!
Sorry, I've been absolutely no help at all have I ?!
Posted 28 November 2012 - 07:37 PM
Im sorry no sound logical reason from me but......
Having 5 is so much fun (also a lot of work )
DH and I never thought we would have this many but each one has just brought so much joy! They are great mates and I hope they remain close into adulthood.
I grew up 1 of 2, I was always envious of my friends that came from large families. Never did I think I would have my own!
Our kids are great sharers (most of the time lol), and stick up for each other all the time. They have to help out with chores around the house (even the two year old has to put his plates up and dirty clothes in the laundry). Of course they have their moments, tantrums, fights, meltdowns at the shops arghh but I wouldnt change it for the world.
Sorry, not much help either. I too feel I will be eternally clucky. Im hoping it will fade with time
Good luck with whatever you both decide
ETA, forgot about the concerts! 4 kids can put on a great concert lol, when the baby gets bigger can't wait to see what he adds to the mix! 5 kids, it will be an extravaganza!!!
Edited by *yassie*, 28 November 2012 - 07:40 PM.
Posted 01 December 2012 - 12:57 PM
Because both me and DH wanted too and we could afford to sustain another child, above I guess the normal expectations of what a child needs, without issue.
I don't feel the need to justify it, as long it is our wish and that child and our current children are not going to be negatively impacted to a point where their standard of living is compromised, that is enough reason for me.
Posted 04 April 2013 - 01:52 PM
just reading through old posts and seeing as I am in the same boat, I wondered what you ended up deciding re having #5?
We also have four - two of each and always said four was our number.
However I have been thinking off and on about #5 since we had our fourth four years ago.
She has started Kinder (here in Tas) this year and it is even more in my mind now that I am missing her and those days of babies and toddlers.
Anyway it is a huge decision to make and one that I go around in circles on every day lately. (DH is no help as he would happily have another.)
Tricky with a small house and me a sahm for the past 10 years. (I am meant to be going back to work next year to earn the money for our much needed house extension, so a baby would throw a spanner in the works there.)
Anyway would love to hear what you decided...
Posted 10 April 2013 - 07:19 PM
The only reason I can think of is because you want to.... That's our reason
Posted 11 April 2013 - 05:12 PM
I don't have five but I don't think there is any logical reason for even having one child.
Follow your heart. If you have more love to give then just keep giving.
Posted 11 April 2013 - 06:27 PM
I'll get back to you in November when D? is born.
Basically it came down to us both wanting just one more.
So we are...
Posted 01 May 2013 - 10:25 PM
Woo Hoo thats really great. Well done and congratulations. My number 5 is such a delight that I am contemplating number 6... turning 40 in a week, so I have a small window of opportunity... might see what happens over the next few months, what will be will be......
Glad you made the decision, you will not look back.
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