Jump to content

No-cry = lots of crying?
Am I doing it wrong?


9 replies to this topic

#1 WaitForIt

Posted 23 November 2012 - 08:59 PM

I read no-cry sleep solution, and I thought I understood what was needed but with so many interruptions I'm wondering if I missed something...

Because I'm getting lots of crying. I want to stop feeding my dd to sleep as it means I'm the only one who can put her down. I'm going back to work soon plus I'm sick of feeling guilty on the incredibly rare occasion I go out.

So last night and tonight I decided to change the end of the routine so she is fed until just about asleep, then put in the bassinet and rocked. Both nights, she cried a lot! I picked her up, I cuddled, I offered the boob again (but only until settled) and each time as soon as I put her down, full blown screaming crying.

I guess I should expect this as this is what happens the few times Dh has put her to sleep.

Last night, she did eventually calm down and as i sat next to her and wolfed down my dinner she actually self settled. Tonight, she went straight to screaming, knew what was coming, and never quieted when in the bassinet until eventually, with her still screaming on my shoulder, I noticed she was looking incredibly tired so put her down and with a little rocking she was asleep.

Surely this isn't how no-cry is supposed to go!

Edited by WaitForIt, 23 November 2012 - 09:03 PM.


#2 2 Gorgeous Girls

Posted 23 November 2012 - 09:04 PM

I tried the no cry sleep solution a few different times with my youngest. It made her cry more than ever, clearly I was doing something wrong...

I gave up, eventually she started going to sleep by herself and from about 19 months she's been a champion sleeper.

I realise that is completely unhelpful to you right now though!

#3 mysonsmum

Posted 23 November 2012 - 09:04 PM

How old is ur bub? Have u tried the sleep stores articles? I got some great info on there to slowly & gently wean my son from needing to be feed to sleep when he was 4-5months old & it worked beautifully. (sorry I don't know what the no-cry sleep solution is)

#4 tick

Posted 23 November 2012 - 09:05 PM

Your little girl was born on the same day as mine!

But the no-cry sleep solution is actually missing a word.  It should read: The No Cry Alone Sleep Solution.

Crying is ok, it will happen while she gets used to it.  If you're not leaving her alone then it's not controlled crying or anything and it won't do her any harm.  Hug her, love her, let her cry in your arms or with your arms on her at least, she'll get used to the change eventually!

Here's a nice article about crying that I found really helpful when my first was younger.... http://www.janetlansbury.com/2011/09/7-rea...-babies-crying/ and this one is nice too http://www.peaceful-parent.com/article_childrens_cries.php

Edited by tick, 23 November 2012 - 09:43 PM.


#5 a letter to Elise.

Posted 23 November 2012 - 09:17 PM

We used some of the techniques, but we never quite managed no crying at all. The most successful bit for us was the Pantley dance. I also placed DS in his cot, and sort of hugged him while he was in it, before slowly withdrawing my arms.

The techniques in the book did help, but it took a while, and there was still some crying. I was okay with a bit of crying, as I figure there is a big difference between crying in the loving arms of a parent, versus alone in their bedroom.

#6 Cranky Kitten

Posted 23 November 2012 - 09:22 PM

Yep, there's a word missing. There is a bit of crying as they get used to the changes, but they're not crying in a dark room by themselves. And it's not a quick route - changes like these take time.

We're getting there, DS doesn't feed to sleep any more but is content to be cuddled to sleep in our arms. We're moving towards being able to put him down after his lullaby while he's still awake but he's a bit of a way off yet.

#7 SnazzyFeral

Posted 23 November 2012 - 09:27 PM

I think the book takes 10 weeks? anyway it is a while. But there is also a difference between a baby crying because they are upset about the change and crying because they need comfort. Trust yourself. In my MG we think that if we can ignore the cry then the bub is ok but if the cry is upsetting us they need to be picked up.

#8 WaitForIt

Posted 24 November 2012 - 07:22 PM

Well tonight went a lot smoother! I decided the rocking wasn't working. Her bassinet is pretty solid and doesn't rock very well. So instead, I put my hand on her chest and tapped underneath it below her head. I started this as soon as I put her down and until she went asleep.

Her bedtime was an hour earlier than usual as today was a bit of a mess and affected her naps. She woke up after about 15mins, I tried the tap thing to get her back to sleep but she started to cry so I gave her a feed and started all over again.

So not 100% no tears but close to it! Such a relief! I hope this works again tomorrow.

Edited by WaitForIt, 24 November 2012 - 07:22 PM.


#9 SplashingRainbows

Posted 24 November 2012 - 07:37 PM

No advice just wanted to say well done on the progress.  

Sounds like you may have discovered a nice cue for your daughter.

Don't worry too much if there's a bit of going backwards - progress is progress, you're both learning!

#10 ShamelesslyPooks

Posted 24 November 2012 - 09:23 PM

Yep I agree with PPs, just persist. We have a thing where if we are making a change, we try it for 10 mins, next night 20, next night 30, til DS goes 'oh, now I get it'. Also remember some babies find it harder to get to sleep than others. Sometimes the crying is a bit of stress release (not shrieking, of course, but a bit of a cry), DS has recently started doing a funny kind of laugh as he winds down to sleep but will still cry a little. Sometimes *just* as I think hmm, this is about to escalate, he crashes to sleep. So don't feel that there needs to be no crying.



Reply to this topic



  


0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

We can reduce gender inequality in housework – here’s how

Women shoulder the time-intensive and routine tasks - and they're also more likely to do the least enjoyable tasks like scrubbing the toilets versus washing the car.

Is it okay to reward children with food?

Does giving children food as a reward turn them into emotional eaters?

Exhausted mums share their 'sleepy selfies'

Two photos of mums have shown the world the physical impact of exhaustion in all its frazzled glory.

How to tell a million people: 'We're Having a Baby!'

Pregnancy announcement videos have become so popular they're becoming businesses all their own, with YouTube compilations, Pinterest pages and morning television segments.

The new family holiday: the maternitymoon

It's an idea that makes some people feel excited, while others shudder at the increased difficulty.

Mum's instinct busts hospital protocol

A terrifying car crash that left Danni Bett lying in hospital in a neck-brace wasn't enough to stop her from breastfeeding.

Mum shares pic of Gordon Ramsay's baby doppelganger

A Welsh couple have realised their newborn has a striking resemblance to a certain celebrity chef.

Photographer's charming photos of son's adventures with his toy truck

An adorable toddler and his toy truck in a photo series that'll melt your heart.

Do you hide your emotions from your kids?

I want my children to grow up and know it's okay to feel strong emotion and to display it. Vulnerability and imperfection do not equal weakness.

My in-laws snubbed our wedding

For your own husband's parents not to come to your wedding is an utter embarrassment.

Teenage boy has foetus removed from stomach

A teenage boy has undergone surgery to remove a foetus, complete with hair, legs, hands and genitals, removed from his stomach.

Your one-year-old is more creative than you might think

Even one-year-olds can be very exploratory, experimental and creative.

Researchers claim controlled crying 'does no harm'

The short and long term consequences of controlled crying are under the spotlight with new Australian research suggesting no harm results from the practice.

The pain of teething

If the tooth fairy takes teeth away, it must be something like a goblin who brings them in the first place.

Henry, 3, had a tummy ache. Within hours he was dead

Three-year-old Henry died in February this year, just a few hours after falling ill.

Husband shot obstetrician who saw wife naked

A Saudi man has been arrested after shooting the male obstetrician who delievered his baby because he was unhappy the doctor had seen his wife naked.

This 6-month-old just became 'the youngest water-skier'

First, baby Zyla tried her trick on cushy, beige carpet.

The bedtime bottle: will it really make your baby sleep?

How often have you been told "Just give your breastfed baby a bottle of formula at bedtime to make him sleep"? But does it work?

Why new mum Anne Hathaway cried at the gym

She might be a Hollywood superstar, but the gorgeous Anne Hathaway feels just as self-conscious as other new mums trying to get back in shape after having a baby.

An intimate story of infertility, told from a man's perspective

In a moving 3000-word Facebook post, Dan Majesky has shared a painful journey of infertility, with a big surprise at the end.

Does this photo offend you?

Facebook has come under fire after banning an ad featuring Tess Holliday, a plus-sized model, wearing a bikini.

Baby boy's birth filled with joy and sadness

It was a moment filled with joy but tinged with sadness. 

 
Advertisement
 

Top 5 Articles

Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

The babies who are one in 70 million

Bethani Webb was excited to find out she was pregnant, but the first time mum did not realise she was carrying four babies not one.

Cafe offers breastfeeding mums a free cup of tea

A Sydney cafe is offering breastfeeding mums free cups of tea in a bid to show support for the right of women to nurse their babies wherever they choose.

To snip or not to snip? When the decision is not clear cut

Jamie Oliver, who considered a vasectomy, is to be a father again. A fellow dad reflects on his own decision 11 years ago

Doctors stunned by rare twins born almost six weeks apart

To everyone's surprise, Kristen Miller "kept doing better each day", keeping her second baby safe.

Baby book ideas for modern parents

Before my son was born I was given a lovely baby book full of blank pages waiting to be filled with weights and heights and first words.

The adorable smile of a baby seeing his mum clearly for the first time

There is no doubt seeing their child smile for the first time is an unforgettable moment for parents everywhere.

Mum tells how toddler 'nearly hung himself' in cot mishap

When Alison Johnson put her 18-month-old Caleb down for a nap, she had no reason to believe her son was in any danger.

Babies are still switched at birth? Yes, it can happen

All my panic and tears aside, my biggest question looking back is about the kind of security measures used in the maternity ward.

Doctors slammed for taking selfie with newborn

Everyone who visits a mum in hospital in the days following childbirth wants to get a photo with the new baby.

ergoPouch Twosie Sleepsuit for winter breastfeeding

Finally, there's a way to keep warm while breastfeeding through winter.

Health check: How long does sex 'normally' last?

What to do with this information? My advice would be to try not to think about it during the throes of passion.

When breastfeeding sucks: fixing common problems

From niplash to tight boobs, biting to milk supply issues, Pinky McKay looks at common breastfeeding issues and how to solve them.

10 things I've learnt in my first six months with twins

Six months on we're all still alive, and the more we get to know each other the easier the days become.

Mum's loving kiss leaves baby fighting for life

Kirsty Carrington thought nothing of giving her newborn son a kiss, little did she know it would leave the baby fighting for life.

When doing chores is your new 'me time'

After children, 'me time' looks a little different.

Get going: 14 travel strollers for families on the move

A stroller can make or break travelling with a baby or toddler. Here are 15 great single travel stroller options.

10 ways toddlers are terrific

It always pays to remind yourself of how terrific toddlers can be - they're little like this for such a short time

 

Vintage Toys

The toys of your childhood

Take a trip down memory lane with these vinage and retro toys that you may have had in your childhood or your parent's childhood.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.