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Managing Christmas present expectations

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#1 Molondy

Posted 19 November 2012 - 07:17 PM

I encouraged the kids to do their letters to Santa on the weekend. My son wants a Woody doll and a Mr Potato Head. My daughter (6) wants an ipod touch and hair bands.

I had already planned to get the Woody doll but I'm not getting my daughter an ipod touch. I think she is to young, she already has plenty of screen time and it will only cause fights between her and her brother.

I broke the news to her today and further dampened her expectations why I told her that No, she wouldn't "just" be getting a DS instead (same reasons as above although she's probably not too young for a DS).

Anyway she is very very upset and I am dreading Christmas morning with our entire family which includes 6 kids ranging in age from 3 - 7 with Grace chucking a tantrum because she isn't getting a bloody ipod. Not to mention the pain I feel when my suck ass presents fail to measure up.

Edited by Molondy, 19 November 2012 - 07:21 PM.

#2 girltribe4

Posted 19 November 2012 - 07:22 PM

I have no answers because I am dealing with a '' Even Santa will not bring a $400+ lego thingy'' '' No the Elves can't just make it ''

#3 amaza

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:04 PM

I'm dealing with a $400 'electric go kart' myself. When I said it cost too much he said 'oh but Santa makes his toys.' I told him that the parts still cost lots of money and it's not fair for all the other children if Santa spent so much money on just him. Then I worked hard to excite him about other toys.

He seems to have accepted it so far (he is 6 too).

#4 Penguin78

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:09 PM

Its a good lesson for her to learn.. dont let it get to you OP... Christmas isnt about the presents, and she will get that one day...


#5 FeralProudSwahili

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:16 PM

She's 6, she'll get over it.

#6 Ianthe

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:23 PM

This might sound weird but I have never asked my kids to do letters to Santa. Santa just brings little things here so I didn't want them to get their hearts set on something and be disappointed on Christmas Day. I could always assess what they would enjoy based on their current interests.

#7 EssentialBludger

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:23 PM

This is the reason Santa doesn't bring flashy things in this house. ph34r.gif

Santa fills the stocking here with little bits and bobs. hair ties, bubbles, textas, stationary, lollies, drink bottles etc.

My kids have never asked for anything extravaggant from Santa. They ask me and I tell them yes/no depending on if I can afford it or not.

#8 mummanazz

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:26 PM

I think you are doing the right thing if it makes you feel any better, OP  original.gif

#9 Just a marshmallow

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:30 PM

I also agree you are doing the right thing.

I have told my daughters that while Santa brings the presents, Mum and Dad get the right to veto.  If we don't want Santa to bring an iPod, he will respect that.

They have accepted it so far. (Phew)

#10 Fr0g

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:31 PM

Yeah, tell your DD that Santa isn't bringing my 11 year old a much coveted X-Box, either, if it makes her feel better.

(In fact, he persists in nagging, Santa may bring him a lump of coal, rolled in glitter if he's feeling charitable :/ )

They'll survive.

Edited by FrogIsAFrogIsAFrog, 19 November 2012 - 08:32 PM.

#11 Funwith3

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:34 PM

QUOTE (Swahili @ 19/11/2012, 09:16 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
She's 6, she'll get over it.

Not necessarily.
My 7 year old DD wrote her Santa letter on the weekend too. She asked for a DS. She's been putting a DS on her Santa and birthday list ever since DS's came out. Well, at least since she was 4 anyway. She definitely hasn't gotten over it.

She's not getting it because same as you OP, I think she gets plenty of screen time with television, iPod, computer and iPad. And it will cause fights.

OP, would it be a compromise to get her just the iPod shuffle? Not really a screen on it, they just play music. You could even load it up with just kids music.

Edited by Funwith3, 19 November 2012 - 08:36 PM.

#12 Princess.cranky.pants

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:39 PM

Santa tries to bring what you realy want in our house. But I tell the kids he knows what is best for you and it might not be the thing you have asked for.

I wouldn't worry about. She will most likely be over it soon enough and forget about it on the bid day with all the excitement.

#13 Chief Pancake Make

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:41 PM

Last year my nephew was very unimpressed with the books i gave him  "thats not a toy".  This year we asked SIL what he wanted and were told a very specific skylander toy.  Then we heard he threw a tantrum becuase he wanted the toy now not at christmas.  We went to 7 shops and no one has it so we got him a skylander accessory  - I am sure there will be a tantrum at christmas when it is not what he wanted.  If I was his mother I would take it away and he wouldn't get anything, but I cant see that happening.

#14 MsNorbury

Posted 19 November 2012 - 08:53 PM

Last year my nephew was very unimpressed with the books i gave him "thats not a toy".

I felt like this as I was always the aunt who got my niece books, one year I tried to be the cool aunty and got toys/dvds and she did chuck a tanty because she wanted books, like I always get her rolleyes.gif

Back to what I know, she is getting a pile of books this year.

DD requested a mermaid tail from santa one year which he delivered, but it wasn't up to scratch (it didn't actually turn her into a real mermaid). She has since come to the conclusion that the nice surprises santa picks are usually better than whet she asks for.

Edited by juliettesmum, 19 November 2012 - 09:13 PM.

#15 Molondy

Posted 19 November 2012 - 09:02 PM

She's 6, she'll get over it.

Yes well thanks - I am aware she will get over it but I'm not actually worried about her I'm worried about me having to deal with her attitude (not surprisingly her attitude is something of an issue with us at the moment).

Thanks to everyone who helped me realise I am not alone!
OP, would it be a compromise to get her just the iPod shuffle?

That's a nice idea but I doubt it would cut it - its all about the screen time and, of course, what "all" her friends (that is one) have....

I just have to suck it up on the day and hope she is distracted by the clothes, books, stationery set, towel (another specific request) and build a  bear voucher!!!

#16 Flaxen

Posted 19 November 2012 - 09:04 PM

Long time ago now  tongue.gif , but mum had me write a letter to santa about all the good deeds i had, or hadnt done. I now see it as a way of recognising the good, and owning up to the bad, and is the way i will do it for my DD. It was never a letter for specific items i wanted, but i was able to give hints on what type of things interested me. (ponies, the colour green, colouring in ect)

Edited by Flaxen, 19 November 2012 - 09:07 PM.

#17 lafonda

Posted 19 November 2012 - 09:10 PM

I got DS to do his letter too, he would like a wrestler and a title belt, both of which I can do.

#18 jayskette

Posted 19 November 2012 - 09:16 PM

biggrin.gif The problem was that you said YOU won't give her the ipod instead of Santa

#19 julz78

Posted 19 November 2012 - 09:16 PM

6 yr old DS has baby brother on top of his list  ohmy.gif

#20 *Lib*

Posted 19 November 2012 - 09:21 PM

I got my dd to do a list for santa....she then emailed it to my parents and put a $ sign beside the things she really wants.

She's had a DS and a dsi. Now she wants the DS3D. I told her no way in hell.

#21 OneProudMum

Posted 19 November 2012 - 09:23 PM

Seriously my DS is 8 and he has no issues with what other kids have and whether he measures up.

#22 DragonflyGal

Posted 19 November 2012 - 09:23 PM

My 3.5 year old wants a rocket ship. Not a toy one, a "real one, a really real rocket ship".

#23 Shellby

Posted 19 November 2012 - 09:26 PM

If she is having attitude problem then not getting it for her is most likely a better gift anyway - it is an important lesson to learn you don't always get what you ask for. All I can suggest is not bringing the subject up and work on it on the day, if she has a melt down because she didn't get what she wanted then you can punish her then - she may surprise you and just be happy with what she gets.

Guess I am lucky, my boys really are happy with whatever they get, we never focus on gifts for Christmas, might ask what they will like but they don't expect it. This year it's Lego, so will be one big set each and some little sets.

#24 libbylu

Posted 19 November 2012 - 09:33 PM

Santa only brings small presents in our house too.
The bigger presents come from Mum and Dad, and sometimes grandparents.
DS doesn't write a letter to santa but he keeps a present wishlist which he adds to everytime he sees something he wants.  This helps manage the fuss at the shops when buying gifts for other kids or when he's been at a friends house and seen other cool toys he doesn't have.  In response to the 'I wanna xyz" whinge, I just say "add it to your list".
Before Christmas I let him know that he will only be getting a few things from the list, and then we get what seems reasonable/possible.

#25 Broxie

Posted 19 November 2012 - 09:34 PM

So I'm the only one that would get her the iPod then?

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