Jump to content

Temperamental nearly 4 year old


  • Please log in to reply
12 replies to this topic

#1 SashaN

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:13 PM

Hi girls my DS is 4 in two weeks his always been a bit temperamental compared to other children I see and not so temperamental as others but the last month his began to get this aggressive streak and now gets quite aggressive when playing with his father and it turns into unacceptable behaviour.

He can  be happy one minute then the next have a meltdown.

I have heard and read about boys getting like this around 4 due to maybe a testosterone surge so not sure if this is true or this is why.

He also is so naughty and so defiant with discipline he does not respond to time out (never worked for him) and to put him in his bedroom he will try and kick the door we are in a semi so have adjoining walls to next door and they have a young bub so i am concious of him making too much noise so i have to open it so this does not work.

I m also worried that this means his going to be temperamental all his life my husband and i are very or were usually calm people and hate conflict.

Has anyone else had a DS/DD around this age act like this and grow out of it to be calmer once they reached 5 or started school?

Sasha

#2 Missy Shelby

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:18 PM

I will be stalking for replies wink.gif I am in the same boat as you atm op!!

#3 spando

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:22 PM

I'm stalking as well

#4 imamumto3

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:24 PM

sounds like my dd.  she has improved in the last week.  we have been doing the fed up diet, although not strictly, I think it has helped

#5 Angelina Ballerina

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:25 PM

I think my 3.5 DS is going through this too. I had wondered if it was a developmental stage.

#6 Missy Shelby

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:28 PM

Nice to know that we are not the only parents dealing with this!!

#7 wallofdodo

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:39 PM

4 in Jan, while not exactly the same,  we have got a lot of yelling, and kicking when things don't go his way. Aggressive, but not physically like you described with playing.

he has been this way for a few months now, and I feel we are getting a handle on it. Lots of talk about being frustrated and angry. And how there are better ways to deal with these emotions.

Actually the turn around was when a friend's son piffed a trainat his head. He got really upset and asked why he did it. I explained that friend was just a bit angry and frustrated, and how he was feeling,  is how I feel when he kicks or yells at me.

So I don't think it is an indication of personality but just a stage that needs more management, and maybe a two year old to throw trains!! Haha. Hope I don't eat my words!

#8 my serenity

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:46 PM

I call 4 in boys the dark side (10 isn't  pleasant either) and have told many s friend this it passes just be consistent in punishments.  some days/weeks worse than others .

#9 Hootabelles

Posted 14 November 2012 - 09:13 PM

Same here with my DD who is 4 in a month.  She has always been a bit more of a 'challenging' child.
We are also in an old Victorian so I am surprised that Docs haven't turned up yet (yet being the operative word wink.gif )

I have changed myself a bit as I started to lose it with her.  Now I count to 10 and go to her and give her a big cuddle  (try anyway)_ and get her to count with me.  Sometimes she hits out at me, other times she slumps in my arms defeated & crying out how tired she is.
I just feel consoled in knowing she isn't the only one.  I am probably at the lowest point I have ever been with her.  I'm on executive b for the stress and don't go anywhere without my Rescue remedy for me either!
We had a park play with kinder kids today and she had a total meltdown kicking and screaming.  SHe hit out at me and I picked her up and took her away.  The anger in me was beyond anything I have felt and was in tears.  I sat her down and held her in my arms. When she calmed down we talked and I waited a few minutes to go back and she was fine.
It's like she hits this crescendo where you cannot go near her and then if you can catch it the right time (along with a few hits along the way sadly) then I find I can get her to calm...but it is the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with.  It is disheartening and sometimes I wonder what I have done wrong.
Ok...I have just hijacked so sorry.  I think I am just letting out some pent up feelings....
Hope it gets better for you OP..I wish I knew the answer to this behavior but know you are not alone and it is definitely not only boys!!

#10 SashaN

Posted 15 November 2012 - 06:05 AM

Hi girls thanks for all your posts its good to see we are not the only one going through this trying stage and also its not just boys as well.

I hope we all find this stage ends quickly and does not go on for too long.

Bubba08 hang in there i have had days where i have had tears or felt like tears then days that are wonderful they seem to go up and down and yes i agree to when tired and hungry it escalates.

As Angelina Balerina said prob a developmental stage.

hugs to all

Sasha

#11 Mum2TwoDSs

Posted 15 November 2012 - 06:23 AM

QUOTE (SashaN @ 14/11/2012, 09:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi girls my DS is 4 in two weeks his always been a bit temperamental compared to other children I see and not so temperamental as others but the last month his began to get this aggressive streak and now gets quite aggressive when playing with his father and it turns into unacceptable behaviour.

He can  be happy one minute then the next have a meltdown.

Has anyone else had a DS/DD around this age act like this and grow out of it to be calmer once they reached 5 or started school?



My DS is 7 but I don't recall him being anything as described. He did have two kinder mates who behaved like that.  one kicked furniture and his mum didn't know what to do. Another always like to play the bad person eg Decepticon instead of an autobot. Both boys are Ben 10 fans.

#12 SashaN

Posted 15 November 2012 - 08:43 PM

Hi Mum2TwoDss he doesnt kick furniture normally or destructive it was only when i put him in his room and closed the door normally he is not violent like that at all so this is why i am hoping its a stage that he will come out of quickly he also doesnt like being the bad guy in role playing if thats what your saying i dont think that has ever come about at all.

His more into Curious George, Team Umizooms etc.

Daycare say his one of the more responsible and sensible children there...

Hmmm will just have to ride this one out.

Sasha

#13 rogue-shadow

Posted 15 November 2012 - 10:14 PM

Glad to know it's not only my just turned 4 yr old. He's been a nightmare for the last few months. Doing my head in.




0 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 0 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Vote in our Parents' Choice Awards

Vote now and you could win a a share of $2500 worth of prizes including a Redsbaby Jive, an ErgoBaby 360, and $1500 cash.

'I will defend my son's right to wear a tutu'

Three-year-old boy Roo likes to wear tutus and, until now, it hasn't been a problem.

Chinese sign up toddlers for chief executive classes

CHILDREN as young as three are being enrolled in "chief executive courses" in China as pushy parents become obsessed with giving their offspring an advantage over their young peers.

Free ticket offer

Pinky Mckay joins us again at the Essential Baby & Toddler Show presented by Blackmores with her expert baby settling advice. Register now for your free ticket.

The 'best little baby' and the police officer who rescued him

"And just in my head, I'm a father myself, and I couldn't sit there and let him ... I couldn't let him sit in that."

Olympian sells medal to pay for child's cancer treatment

An Olympian has sold his medal to help fund cancer treatment for a 3-year-old boy.

Family of mum who took her own life speak out about PND

From the outside it looked like Allison Goldstein was blissfully happy. She had a new baby, a loving husband, and was part of a close knit-family.

For the festival lover in all of us

Pre-book & Save 50%. Get your tickets now for Kidtopia Festival. 7-9 October 2016 Parramatta Park, Sydney.

BuggyCart solves the dilemma of shopping with a pram

Ducking to the shops for some groceries is a whole other ballgame once you have a baby.

Viral photo shows powerful moment before second baby's arrival

While our second baby was very much wanted, I wondered if I could love another baby as much as I loved my first.

What does a baby with whooping cough sound like? Sometimes like this

It's a heartbreaking video that's difficult to watch, but that's just what Sydney mum of two Sandra wants people to do.

Cheers! Why we're all happy to be bad mothers now

A new generation of mums is resisting the pressure to be "perfect" - and revelling in their naughty side?

Dealing with mealtime fussiness: mums share their tips

It can be frustrating, worrying, and turn into a battle of wills - but it doesn't have to be like that

Why having a puppy is like parenting a child

Despite being a dog owner and a parent, I've never been able to relate to the idea that the two have many similarities – until now.

Baby Joey is sleeping star in adorable photos

When photographer mum Laura Izumikawa puts her baby daughter down to sleep, the last thing on her mind is rest.

The necessity of 'Do not disturb' signs for napping babies

Needless to say, the last thing any mum wants is for someone to loudly knock on the door and wake their sleeping cherub.

Mum's brutal truth about c-section: 'This is not the easy way out'

A new mum has shared photos of her caesarean section scar to prove she did not "take the easy way out" when giving birth to her son.

Twins give birth in same hospital just hours apart

Leanne went into labour on July 28, and remarkably, her twin sister Natalie soon followed.

Goki Ride-On cars for toddlers

Toddlers just love to ride on anything with wheels but will often reject the pram once they can walk.

Letting your health slide as you look after the kids? Here's how to get out of the trap

It's time to start prioritising our own health, as well as the health of our children, to avoid longer lasting health challenges.

How to child-proof every room in your house

A guide to making your home a safer place for little ones.

Portable pool safety reminder after toddler's death

The drowning of a Hobart toddler has prompted a coroner to remind the community that even inflatable and portable pools must be fenced.

I have a clingy toddler - help!

"Nothing stops the clinginess - he cries when I put him down, no matter how long I hold him."

Woman sues after botched termination leads to motherhood

A 23-year-old mother is suing her GP and the public health system for thousands of dollars to support her son after her termination went wrong.

 
Advertisement
 

Top 5 Articles

Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Vote in our Parents' Choice Awards - and WIN!

Vote now and you could win a a share of $2500 worth of prizes including a Redsbaby Jive, an ErgoBaby 360, and $1500 cash.

For the festival lover in all of us

Pre-book & Save 50%. Get your tickets now for Kidtopia Festival. 7-9 October 2016 Parramatta Park, Sydney.

 

SYDNEY SHOW - 23-25 Sept

Essential Baby & Toddler Show - Sydney

The Essential Baby & Toddler Show, presented by Blackmores, will be held in Sydney on 23-25 September. Register for your free ticket now to save $20!

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.