Jump to content

Temperamental nearly 4 year old


  • Please log in to reply
12 replies to this topic

#1 SashaN

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:13 PM

Hi girls my DS is 4 in two weeks his always been a bit temperamental compared to other children I see and not so temperamental as others but the last month his began to get this aggressive streak and now gets quite aggressive when playing with his father and it turns into unacceptable behaviour.

He can  be happy one minute then the next have a meltdown.

I have heard and read about boys getting like this around 4 due to maybe a testosterone surge so not sure if this is true or this is why.

He also is so naughty and so defiant with discipline he does not respond to time out (never worked for him) and to put him in his bedroom he will try and kick the door we are in a semi so have adjoining walls to next door and they have a young bub so i am concious of him making too much noise so i have to open it so this does not work.

I m also worried that this means his going to be temperamental all his life my husband and i are very or were usually calm people and hate conflict.

Has anyone else had a DS/DD around this age act like this and grow out of it to be calmer once they reached 5 or started school?

Sasha

#2 Missy Shelby

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:18 PM

I will be stalking for replies wink.gif I am in the same boat as you atm op!!

#3 spando

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:22 PM

I'm stalking as well

#4 imamumto3

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:24 PM

sounds like my dd.  she has improved in the last week.  we have been doing the fed up diet, although not strictly, I think it has helped

#5 Angelina Ballerina

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:25 PM

I think my 3.5 DS is going through this too. I had wondered if it was a developmental stage.

#6 Missy Shelby

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:28 PM

Nice to know that we are not the only parents dealing with this!!

#7 wallofdodo

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:39 PM

4 in Jan, while not exactly the same,  we have got a lot of yelling, and kicking when things don't go his way. Aggressive, but not physically like you described with playing.

he has been this way for a few months now, and I feel we are getting a handle on it. Lots of talk about being frustrated and angry. And how there are better ways to deal with these emotions.

Actually the turn around was when a friend's son piffed a trainat his head. He got really upset and asked why he did it. I explained that friend was just a bit angry and frustrated, and how he was feeling,  is how I feel when he kicks or yells at me.

So I don't think it is an indication of personality but just a stage that needs more management, and maybe a two year old to throw trains!! Haha. Hope I don't eat my words!

#8 my serenity

Posted 14 November 2012 - 08:46 PM

I call 4 in boys the dark side (10 isn't  pleasant either) and have told many s friend this it passes just be consistent in punishments.  some days/weeks worse than others .

#9 Hootabelles

Posted 14 November 2012 - 09:13 PM

Same here with my DD who is 4 in a month.  She has always been a bit more of a 'challenging' child.
We are also in an old Victorian so I am surprised that Docs haven't turned up yet (yet being the operative word wink.gif )

I have changed myself a bit as I started to lose it with her.  Now I count to 10 and go to her and give her a big cuddle  (try anyway)_ and get her to count with me.  Sometimes she hits out at me, other times she slumps in my arms defeated & crying out how tired she is.
I just feel consoled in knowing she isn't the only one.  I am probably at the lowest point I have ever been with her.  I'm on executive b for the stress and don't go anywhere without my Rescue remedy for me either!
We had a park play with kinder kids today and she had a total meltdown kicking and screaming.  SHe hit out at me and I picked her up and took her away.  The anger in me was beyond anything I have felt and was in tears.  I sat her down and held her in my arms. When she calmed down we talked and I waited a few minutes to go back and she was fine.
It's like she hits this crescendo where you cannot go near her and then if you can catch it the right time (along with a few hits along the way sadly) then I find I can get her to calm...but it is the hardest thing I have ever had to deal with.  It is disheartening and sometimes I wonder what I have done wrong.
Ok...I have just hijacked so sorry.  I think I am just letting out some pent up feelings....
Hope it gets better for you OP..I wish I knew the answer to this behavior but know you are not alone and it is definitely not only boys!!

#10 SashaN

Posted 15 November 2012 - 06:05 AM

Hi girls thanks for all your posts its good to see we are not the only one going through this trying stage and also its not just boys as well.

I hope we all find this stage ends quickly and does not go on for too long.

Bubba08 hang in there i have had days where i have had tears or felt like tears then days that are wonderful they seem to go up and down and yes i agree to when tired and hungry it escalates.

As Angelina Balerina said prob a developmental stage.

hugs to all

Sasha

#11 Mum2TwoDSs

Posted 15 November 2012 - 06:23 AM

QUOTE (SashaN @ 14/11/2012, 09:13 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
Hi girls my DS is 4 in two weeks his always been a bit temperamental compared to other children I see and not so temperamental as others but the last month his began to get this aggressive streak and now gets quite aggressive when playing with his father and it turns into unacceptable behaviour.

He can  be happy one minute then the next have a meltdown.

Has anyone else had a DS/DD around this age act like this and grow out of it to be calmer once they reached 5 or started school?



My DS is 7 but I don't recall him being anything as described. He did have two kinder mates who behaved like that.  one kicked furniture and his mum didn't know what to do. Another always like to play the bad person eg Decepticon instead of an autobot. Both boys are Ben 10 fans.

#12 SashaN

Posted 15 November 2012 - 08:43 PM

Hi Mum2TwoDss he doesnt kick furniture normally or destructive it was only when i put him in his room and closed the door normally he is not violent like that at all so this is why i am hoping its a stage that he will come out of quickly he also doesnt like being the bad guy in role playing if thats what your saying i dont think that has ever come about at all.

His more into Curious George, Team Umizooms etc.

Daycare say his one of the more responsible and sensible children there...

Hmmm will just have to ride this one out.

Sasha

#13 rogue-shadow

Posted 15 November 2012 - 10:14 PM

Glad to know it's not only my just turned 4 yr old. He's been a nightmare for the last few months. Doing my head in.




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

A mum's tragic battle against inflammatory breast cancer

At just 37 years of age, with two young sons, Vicki was diagnosed with inflammatory breast cancer. Now her family wants all women to know the symptoms.

The business of babies around the world

Pregnancy and birth is an intriguing process no matter where you are in the world. One soon-to-be father gleans wisdom from a new guide.

Finding a positive path through IVF

It’s not surprising that IVF is often seen as a negative journey towards the ultimate positive, but having a glass-half-full approach can make a big difference to the experience.

Giving strangers the gift of parenthood

A mum explains why she and her husband are choosing to gift their leftover embryos to help strangers achieve their dream of parenthood.

Does morning sickness get better or worse with each child?

Just as every baby is unique, so is every pregnancy. And that means morning sickness can vary a lot, too.

What's so wrong with looking 'mumsy', anyway?

Why is it that the word ‘mumsy’ has connotations of such a negative nature – but seems to be the only other option apart from ‘yummy’?

Trying to speed up the inevitable

As the waiting game of late pregnancy continues, this mum considers a few things that might hurry things up a little.

One month later: where is William Tyrell?

It has been a little over a month since William Tyrell disappeared from his grandmother's home, 33 long sleepless nights for his family as they mourn the absence of their cheeky young boy.

Winter's child less likely to be moody: study

Babies born in the summer are much more likely to suffer from mood swings when they grow up, while those born in the winter are less likely to become irritable adults, scientists claim.

Single mum of two creates award-winning baby app

Suddenly single with a baby and an 11-year-old son, Tara O?Connell developed an app to improve the lives of mothers who were similarly overwhelmed.

Food for thought: looking after yourself as a new mum

As soon as your baby enters the world, everything else takes a back seat - even the necessities of daily life such as eating are severely compromised, right when you need energy the most.

'Grabbable guts' campaign aims to cut toxic fat

The Live Lighter campaign will take people inside the human body to show the internal dangers of being overweight.

The best and worst month of my life

A new mum's first month of motherhood didn't pan out as expected when she lost a family member weeks after her baby's birth.

Facebook and Apple offer to pay female staff to freeze their eggs

Facebook and Apple are hoping to provide women with the freedom to build their careers without the added pressure of having children at or by a certain age.

How a pregnancy contract could work for you and your partner

The idea of making a 'pregnancy contract' with your partner may sound a bit silly at first, but it can help make the transition to parenthood a lot smoother.

Finding a mum-friendly personal trainer

Burping babies vs burpees – yes, new mums and personal trainers live in different worlds. But they can work together - once you find the right match for you and your lifestyle.

Alleged baby snatch incident a ?misunderstanding?, say police

Police say that an incident in which a man pulled on a woman?s pram while walking a popular Sydney route late last month was a misunderstanding.

Ebola killed my aunt and is shutting down my country

Three weeks ago, my auntie, a midwife, developed a fever. Sitting here in Sydney basked in Australian sunshine, that shouldn't be big news.

The night my ovary burst

One mum shares her frightening experience and vows to never take her health for granted again.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Win 1 of 5 Canon Powershot D30 cameras

Capture life more easily with the Canon Powershot D30. Shockproof, waterproof and dustproof, you can take it almost anywhere and shoot beautiful images, time after time. Enter now!

16 parenting truths you won't find in the baby books

I am five years into this parenting gig and I’ve learnt that sleepless nights and changing dirty nappies are child’s play.

Best and worst potty party cakes

It's nice to celebrate a child making the shift from nappies to 'big kid' undies, but do we really need a semi-realistic used toilet cake to do it? Here are some of the best and worst cakes parents have used at 'potty parties' around the world.

7 tips for a financially festive Christmas

Plan ahead - and do it now - to ensure festive season expenses don't break the bank.

'Go the F*** to Sleep' author's new book for frustrated parents

A sequel is coming soon to the 2011 hit book 'Go the F*** to Sleep' - and this time, it's about mealtimes.

Great birthday party buys from Etsy

Handmade crafts to decorate and personalise your child's next birthday - from banners to cake decorations, we've got gorgeous party finds from Etsy.

Creative storage ideas for the kids' rooms

Creative and practical storage ideas for the kids' toys and books can also add some stylish decor to your home. Visit babyology.com.au for more stylish modern finds for hip kids & parents.

The mum who never met her baby

There was one more thing Kymberlie Shepherd wanted to experience in life - motherhood. But a rare illness took her first.

To the mum in the doctor's waiting room

Maybe the mum I saw in that waiting room, seemingly disconnected from her baby, doesn’t have the support she needs.

10 space-saving nursery ideas

Starting a family doesn't always mean moving into a bigger house - not yet, anyway.

 

What's in a name?

Baby Names

Looking for a classic name, or an unusual name? Our Baby Name Finder is for you, search or browse to refine your shortlist.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.