Jump to content

Loving mum too much?
Help needed.


  • Please log in to reply
7 replies to this topic

#1 Feral Nelly

Posted 12 November 2012 - 10:07 AM

My little girl is 23 months old now.


She has always had a very strong bond with her Dad and I (never liked going to other people for cuddles etc) - but has been particularly attached to me.



Her behaviour has become even more challenging lately, especially when she is tired and/or upset.



She will push her Dad away and scream 'No, Mama'. He is not 'allowed' to change her nappy, play with her, feed her or interact with her if I am around. This is despite the fact that he has been her primary carer this year. He was a fulltime SAHP for the first 6 months and now works 2 days a week and is at home 3 days.



She goes to childcare 2 days a week and until about 6 weeks ago, she was doing really well. Happy to be dropped off and really enjoying herself.



Since the school holidays, she has become really unsettled and gets very upset when she is dropped off.



It seems like the more time she spends with me around, the more she rejects her Dad. They get along fine Tues-Fri but by Sunday evening (after two days with Mum at home) she is feral again and won't let Dad do anything. This was even more exaggerated after the school holidays when I was home everyday for two weeks. She wouldn't let me out of her sight by the end of the holidays.



I guess this is part vent, part WTHDYTIGOWH (what the heck do you think is going on with her) and part WWYD.



Does anyone else have a mumophile toddler? Will she get over this stage or am I doomed to have my daughter stuck like a limpet to me forever?

Edited by Plappermaul, 12 November 2012 - 10:09 AM.


#2 Sweet like a lemon

Posted 12 November 2012 - 10:18 AM

QUOTE
This is despite the fact that he has been her primary carer this year.


DD is much the same with her dad and I am the primary carer. My non-scientific, totally unprofessional opinion is children (especially only children) want the parent who is perceived at the least accessible.

If say "Come we need to go to town" it's met with "I don't like shopping, it's boring, I'm not moving for any amount of bribery." If DH says "I'm quickly popping up to town." DDs immediate response is "Wait for me Daddy! I want to come too! I love shopping with you Daddy." lol.

She and I get along great, have a ball of fun all day but the moment DH walks through the door I'm persona non grata.

#3 lozoodle

Posted 12 November 2012 - 10:21 AM

I think its just a toddler thing. Both of mine have gone through phases of only wanting me, and other times only wanting DP.

It seems fairly common and normal from what other parents have said to me as well original.gif

#4 mummy2amelia

Posted 12 November 2012 - 10:30 AM

Age quirk.  

My DD went from me to DH and back again as to who was the favourite.  
DS is
QUOTE
stuck like a limpet to me


I call him my shadow.

Edited by mummy2amelia, 12 November 2012 - 10:30 AM.


#5 Princess.cranky.pants

Posted 12 November 2012 - 10:37 AM

Separation Anxiety peeks in toddlers about 18-24 months. Sounds your DD is going though it.

My 26 month old has been going though separation anxiety for awhile but is just starting to get a bit better. For a time though it was all about me. S

I find she will let DH do things like change her nappy if I am not in the room.

Crying at drop off is normal too. She just wants you. Like most things it dose pass.

#6 Natttmumm

Posted 12 November 2012 - 11:39 AM

DD1 was like that although DH wasn't at home with her as he worked full time. She just didnt want him at all. She still favours me but is ok with him now. This took until 4 yrs old
DD2 will go to the opposite person so if I'm trying to dress her she wants dad advice versa.



#7 Escapin

Posted 12 November 2012 - 11:44 AM

My DD (19mo) wakes up from every sleep and overnight and her first word is 'Daddy?'. She only learnt to say Mummy yesterday!!! I try not to take all this personally wink.gif

And yes, I'm a SAHM at the moment and DH works long hours during the week.

#8 Feral Nelly

Posted 13 November 2012 - 04:33 PM

Thanks for the reassurance - not nice that other people are also going through it but good to know we're not alone!




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

A mum's tragic battle against inflammatory breast cancer

At just 37 years of age, with two young sons, Vicki was diagnosed with inflammatory breast cancer. Now her family wants all women to know the symptoms.

The business of babies around the world

Pregnancy and birth is an intriguing process no matter where you are in the world. One soon-to-be father gleans wisdom from a new guide.

Finding a positive path through IVF

It’s not surprising that IVF is often seen as a negative journey towards the ultimate positive, but having a glass-half-full approach can make a big difference to the experience.

Giving strangers the gift of parenthood

A mum explains why she and her husband are choosing to gift their leftover embryos to help strangers achieve their dream of parenthood.

Does morning sickness get better or worse with each child?

Just as every baby is unique, so is every pregnancy. And that means morning sickness can vary a lot, too.

What's so wrong with looking 'mumsy', anyway?

Why is it that the word ‘mumsy’ has connotations of such a negative nature – but seems to be the only other option apart from ‘yummy’?

Trying to speed up the inevitable

As the waiting game of late pregnancy continues, this mum considers a few things that might hurry things up a little.

One month later: where is William Tyrell?

It has been a little over a month since William Tyrell disappeared from his grandmother's home, 33 long sleepless nights for his family as they mourn the absence of their cheeky young boy.

Winter's child less likely to be moody: study

Babies born in the summer are much more likely to suffer from mood swings when they grow up, while those born in the winter are less likely to become irritable adults, scientists claim.

Single mum of two creates award-winning baby app

Suddenly single with a baby and an 11-year-old son, Tara O?Connell developed an app to improve the lives of mothers who were similarly overwhelmed.

Food for thought: looking after yourself as a new mum

As soon as your baby enters the world, everything else takes a back seat - even the necessities of daily life such as eating are severely compromised, right when you need energy the most.

'Grabbable guts' campaign aims to cut toxic fat

The Live Lighter campaign will take people inside the human body to show the internal dangers of being overweight.

The best and worst month of my life

A new mum's first month of motherhood didn't pan out as expected when she lost a family member weeks after her baby's birth.

Facebook and Apple offer to pay female staff to freeze their eggs

Facebook and Apple are hoping to provide women with the freedom to build their careers without the added pressure of having children at or by a certain age.

How a pregnancy contract could work for you and your partner

The idea of making a 'pregnancy contract' with your partner may sound a bit silly at first, but it can help make the transition to parenthood a lot smoother.

Finding a mum-friendly personal trainer

Burping babies vs burpees – yes, new mums and personal trainers live in different worlds. But they can work together - once you find the right match for you and your lifestyle.

Alleged baby snatch incident a ?misunderstanding?, say police

Police say that an incident in which a man pulled on a woman?s pram while walking a popular Sydney route late last month was a misunderstanding.

Ebola killed my aunt and is shutting down my country

Three weeks ago, my auntie, a midwife, developed a fever. Sitting here in Sydney basked in Australian sunshine, that shouldn't be big news.

The night my ovary burst

One mum shares her frightening experience and vows to never take her health for granted again.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Win 1 of 5 Canon Powershot D30 cameras

Capture life more easily with the Canon Powershot D30. Shockproof, waterproof and dustproof, you can take it almost anywhere and shoot beautiful images, time after time. Enter now!

16 parenting truths you won't find in the baby books

I am five years into this parenting gig and I’ve learnt that sleepless nights and changing dirty nappies are child’s play.

Best and worst potty party cakes

It's nice to celebrate a child making the shift from nappies to 'big kid' undies, but do we really need a semi-realistic used toilet cake to do it? Here are some of the best and worst cakes parents have used at 'potty parties' around the world.

7 tips for a financially festive Christmas

Plan ahead - and do it now - to ensure festive season expenses don't break the bank.

'Go the F*** to Sleep' author's new book for frustrated parents

A sequel is coming soon to the 2011 hit book 'Go the F*** to Sleep' - and this time, it's about mealtimes.

Great birthday party buys from Etsy

Handmade crafts to decorate and personalise your child's next birthday - from banners to cake decorations, we've got gorgeous party finds from Etsy.

Creative storage ideas for the kids' rooms

Creative and practical storage ideas for the kids' toys and books can also add some stylish decor to your home. Visit babyology.com.au for more stylish modern finds for hip kids & parents.

New mum Megan goes topless

Megan Gale has posed topless for magazine's 'sexiest people' issue, five months after welcoming her son.

To the mum in the doctor's waiting room

Maybe the mum I saw in that waiting room, seemingly disconnected from her baby, doesn’t have the support she needs.

10 space-saving nursery ideas

Starting a family doesn't always mean moving into a bigger house - not yet, anyway.

 

What's in a name?

Baby Names

Looking for a classic name, or an unusual name? Our Baby Name Finder is for you, search or browse to refine your shortlist.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.