Jump to content

Loving mum too much?
Help needed.


  • Please log in to reply
7 replies to this topic

#1 Feral Nelly

Posted 12 November 2012 - 10:07 AM

My little girl is 23 months old now.


She has always had a very strong bond with her Dad and I (never liked going to other people for cuddles etc) - but has been particularly attached to me.



Her behaviour has become even more challenging lately, especially when she is tired and/or upset.



She will push her Dad away and scream 'No, Mama'. He is not 'allowed' to change her nappy, play with her, feed her or interact with her if I am around. This is despite the fact that he has been her primary carer this year. He was a fulltime SAHP for the first 6 months and now works 2 days a week and is at home 3 days.



She goes to childcare 2 days a week and until about 6 weeks ago, she was doing really well. Happy to be dropped off and really enjoying herself.



Since the school holidays, she has become really unsettled and gets very upset when she is dropped off.



It seems like the more time she spends with me around, the more she rejects her Dad. They get along fine Tues-Fri but by Sunday evening (after two days with Mum at home) she is feral again and won't let Dad do anything. This was even more exaggerated after the school holidays when I was home everyday for two weeks. She wouldn't let me out of her sight by the end of the holidays.



I guess this is part vent, part WTHDYTIGOWH (what the heck do you think is going on with her) and part WWYD.



Does anyone else have a mumophile toddler? Will she get over this stage or am I doomed to have my daughter stuck like a limpet to me forever?

Edited by Plappermaul, 12 November 2012 - 10:09 AM.


#2 Feral like a Lemon

Posted 12 November 2012 - 10:18 AM

QUOTE
This is despite the fact that he has been her primary carer this year.


DD is much the same with her dad and I am the primary carer. My non-scientific, totally unprofessional opinion is children (especially only children) want the parent who is perceived at the least accessible.

If say "Come we need to go to town" it's met with "I don't like shopping, it's boring, I'm not moving for any amount of bribery." If DH says "I'm quickly popping up to town." DDs immediate response is "Wait for me Daddy! I want to come too! I love shopping with you Daddy." lol.

She and I get along great, have a ball of fun all day but the moment DH walks through the door I'm persona non grata.

#3 lozoodle

Posted 12 November 2012 - 10:21 AM

I think its just a toddler thing. Both of mine have gone through phases of only wanting me, and other times only wanting DP.

It seems fairly common and normal from what other parents have said to me as well original.gif

#4 mummy2amelia

Posted 12 November 2012 - 10:30 AM

Age quirk.  

My DD went from me to DH and back again as to who was the favourite.  
DS is
QUOTE
stuck like a limpet to me


I call him my shadow.

Edited by mummy2amelia, 12 November 2012 - 10:30 AM.


#5 Princess.cranky.pants

Posted 12 November 2012 - 10:37 AM

Separation Anxiety peeks in toddlers about 18-24 months. Sounds your DD is going though it.

My 26 month old has been going though separation anxiety for awhile but is just starting to get a bit better. For a time though it was all about me. S

I find she will let DH do things like change her nappy if I am not in the room.

Crying at drop off is normal too. She just wants you. Like most things it dose pass.

#6 Natttmumm

Posted 12 November 2012 - 11:39 AM

DD1 was like that although DH wasn't at home with her as he worked full time. She just didnt want him at all. She still favours me but is ok with him now. This took until 4 yrs old
DD2 will go to the opposite person so if I'm trying to dress her she wants dad advice versa.



#7 Escapin

Posted 12 November 2012 - 11:44 AM

My DD (19mo) wakes up from every sleep and overnight and her first word is 'Daddy?'. She only learnt to say Mummy yesterday!!! I try not to take all this personally wink.gif

And yes, I'm a SAHM at the moment and DH works long hours during the week.

#8 Feral Nelly

Posted 13 November 2012 - 04:33 PM

Thanks for the reassurance - not nice that other people are also going through it but good to know we're not alone!




1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

Recall: Another cot deemed unsafe

Parents are being warned to check their baby's cot is not one of those which have been recalled in recent weeks due to safety concerns.

The truth about breastfeeding and weightloss

Celebrities often state that their post-baby weight loss is down to breastfeeding, and breastfeeding alone. But that's not the reality for all women.

10 weird things little kids do

Most kids have their own personal brand of oddity. It's usually nothing to worry about, but every now and again you might find yourself scratching your head and asking, ?Really? Is that really a thing??

The app that helps detect signs of autism

Parents can assess their children's progress at critical developmental stages, thanks to this new app.

Long battle to learn the truth about Ariana's birth

Cerise and Tim Lawn spent two years fighting to find out how a healthy pregnancy turned into a nightmare birth, and why their daughter now suffers from disabilities she shouldn't have.

Christina Aguilera announces daughter's name

Christina Aguilera and her fiance, Matt Rutler, have welcomed their daughter into the world.

Couple caught in surrogacy crackdown

An Australian couple caught up in Thailand's surrogacy crackdown have said many parents are distraught and facing dire financial difficulties as are they are unable to bring their surrogate-born babies home.

'Tired' mum dies of undiagnosed diabetes

New mum Nicky Rigby thought her exhaustion was due to the demands of looking after her baby. But the 26-year-old was seriously ill with diabetes, and died due to her condition not being diagnosed.

5 co-sleeping myths busted

In case you are co-sleeping with your baby, and all the ?helpful? advice from others is sending you down the slippery slope of self-doubt, let?s bust a few myths on the topic.

When pregnancy takes you down memory lane

One mum-to-be discovers pregnancy hormones can give rise to some surprising emotions.

What?s your love language?

The secret to making your partner feel special is to know which language of love they favour ? and it?s the same for your kids, too.

Returning to exercise after a caesarean

I had my daughter four months ago via caesarean, and I want to get back into exercise. What are some good first steps I can take?

20 signs of a great relationship

The secret to a perfect relationship is admitting you are wrong after an argument, five kisses a day and sex twice a week, a new survey suggests.

Video: emotional 60-second Robin Williams tribute

Take a minute to remember some of the greatest films of your childhood ... and have a few tissues close at hand.

The realities of escaping domestic violence

?Why doesn?t she just leave?? is the common question people ask when trying to understand domestic violence. For many, leaving the relationship is far from straightforward.

Win back some precious time and get FREE coupons

Membership to eBay's Bubs? Corner is free and includes a $10 coupon to spend on nappies each month - a win for multitasking mums!

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Win back some precious time and get FREE coupons

Membership to eBay's Bubs? Corner is free and includes a $10 coupon to spend on nappies each month - a win for multitasking mums!

Do you suffer from Precious Firstborn Syndrome?

Testing ?no more tears? shampoo in your own eyes, warming cucumber sticks so they're not cold straight from the fridge, waking a sleeping baby to check they?re still breathing: these are all symptoms of Precious Firstborn Syndrome.

Ezra's tragic death not in vain, mum says

Little Ezra was a "Harry Houdini" who loved trying to escape the family home. Now, after his tragic death, his parents are doing what they can to help others.

7 mistakes old hands make with new babies

As I sat across the table from my friend ? me, a seasoned mother of three; her, a brand new mum ? I thought of all the mistakes an old-hand parent can make when visiting a newborn baby.

Video: When adults act like children

Ever wondered what would happen if adults were allowed to act like children? This dad's hilarious video clip will give you an idea of what life would be like.

Mums hit hardest as flu cases skyrocket

The number of confirmed cases of influenza in Australia has doubled the number for the same time last year - and women are 25 per cent more likely to get it.

The mum who had four babies in nine months

Feeling exhausted due to the demands of caring for a baby? Imagine the life of this mum, who gave birth to three boys and one girl in just nine months.

Everything baby at Big W

Lowest prices on everything baby, only at Big W. Sale starts August 4 and ends August 20 2014.

Smiggle is painting the town red!

We have 3 Red Smiggle prize packs to give away! Enter by posting a photo of something red to your Instagram.

Mum gives birth at school

Whether they're out of favour traditional names, or the parents were a little creative, here are the least popular names of 2013.

Personalised baby gifts

We've scoured the internet to find gorgeous personalised keepsakes and nursery decor to record baby name and dates. They make great gifts for christenings, name days and birthdays! (All prices in AU.)

 

Mind, body, beauty, life

Making time for me

We look at your wellbeing, covering health, relationships, beauty and fashion, mind and body.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.