Jump to content

How do ppl cope with TTC?


  • Please log in to reply
16 replies to this topic

#1 Silverchick

Posted 06 November 2012 - 03:34 PM

Im aware some ppl are infertile for what feels like a life time. What sort of stuff do you put in place to stop you from going a little batty? Iv even gone as far as seeing hypnotherapist! Not even to conceive, just to try and stop neurotically obsessing and feeling so emotional.

#2 Otis the Pug

Posted 06 November 2012 - 04:37 PM

I believe in positive thought and distraction. My favourite is "it will happen some day." Another is "I'm not alone in this journey, 1 out of 6 have problems conceiving."

Don't look at: baby catalogues, baby websites, related photos on facebook and ignore other peoples posts about their pregnancy. Basically: don't stress, don't think about ttc (much) and keep away from things which remind you about how hard it is.

#3 CountryFeral

Posted 06 November 2012 - 04:47 PM

I don't know Silverchick.... I think I have actually gone a little batty!
I know I've let the rest of my life fall into ruin and it isn't good.

It's been so long now I just have to roll with it - there is no other choice.

I know the amount of time I waste on EB isn't healthy that's for sure... but there is a part of me that thinks - if I give away EB I've given up for good.

I use this as my outlet - I can't talk to anyone IRL (well except DP - I realised on the weekend his way of coping is to blame our FS - or "That Bullsh*tting Quack" as he referred to him!)... it has been so bloody long now they all just assume we gave up long ago.

#4 BJBubbles

Posted 06 November 2012 - 05:35 PM

Honestly, like countrymel, after long enough you give in and embrace the crazy!  I also probably spend too much time on EB... But I'm not overly game to venture into the general too often, so torture myself more in the TTC/Pregnancy forums.  I'm a sucker for punishment...

We then tried to keep our lie outside of TTC busy and fun and eventful...

We started a business - importing and selling wine - so obviously had to do a lot of research and tasting for that ph34r.gif

We also spent a LOT, and I mean stupid ridiculous amounts of money, on holidays.  We took 2 trips to Europe (3 weeks and 5 weeks) within 10 months  blush.gif   Plus a bunch of other trips within Australia.  We used travelling as our form of therapy. In hind-sigh, a psychiatrist would have been a lot cheaper, but nowhere near as fun!

Spent more money on doctors and alternative medicines - was willing to give anything a try!

And just kept telling myself, it HAS to happen... eventually...  because I was unwilling to accept or even consider the alternative.



#5 Bwok~Bwok

Posted 06 November 2012 - 07:36 PM

It's a hard one to answer as everyone is different and at different stages of TTC...

For me - distractions weren't enough! The only way I stopped myself from going 'batty' (I've been there quite a few times over the years) was Acceptance! Accepting each hurdle that is thrown at you. eg Accepting TTC naturally takes time, Accepting there are still problems (had problems TTC with XH), Accepting TTC naturally isn't going to happen for me, currently trying to accept my BFP from IVF is ending in Chemical Pg etc. Without it, I couldn't/can't move forward! But it's an awfully bitter pill to swallow.



#6 Mrsjessiccas

Posted 22 November 2012 - 01:53 PM

Lol. I agree with BJBUBBLES- embrace the crazy!


#7 Jenferal

Posted 22 November 2012 - 02:03 PM

Chocolate original.gif
online computer games for mindless distraction.
shopping for me
lots of books
oh I found male friends(I had 2 to talk to) were REALLY good to talk to because they liked the science stuff and weren't emotionally involved which I think women tend to be. They didn't have kids and can't have kids so they don't care as much if I couldn't. Or maybe it was just my male friends.
More chocolate.
And Bwok-Bwok makes a good point of acceptance. Though that takes time.

#8 Satay Chicken

Posted 22 November 2012 - 02:15 PM

I went batty a number of times, like seriously batty - but those were lows my rock bottom and I knew I had to just get back on the bandwagon and keep going.

Probably my biggest sanity saver was my Friday afternoon p*ss-ups with DH, we would head down the pub, sit in our favourite spot and get blotto!!  Those times ended up being some of the best we've ever had..

Oh, and three trips to Vegas helped....

Edited by Satay chicken, 22 November 2012 - 02:17 PM.


#9 Guest_- Poppy -_*

Posted 22 November 2012 - 02:26 PM

I drank.

Not good advice obviously but the baby I am pregnant with now was actually concieved on a drunken night when DH and I actually decided we would take a break because I was going batty.



#10 la di dah

Posted 22 November 2012 - 02:32 PM

I have an obscene post-count.

I also plan in absolute blood-curdling detail baby names, nurseries, planning how to make my cats adjust to babies, etc.

#11 PrincessPeach

Posted 22 November 2012 - 02:36 PM

Distraction techniques are working for me at the moment.

Mind you I've only been trying for 6 months & so far I've managed to have a function to look forward to around the same time AF has been due. Means i can have that glass of bubble's or the cheese & not give two thoughts to it.

#12 Satay Chicken

Posted 22 November 2012 - 02:40 PM

QUOTE (la di dah @ 22/11/2012, 03:32 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I have an obscene post-count.

I also plan in absolute blood-curdling detail baby names, nurseries, planning how to make my cats adjust to babies, etc.


roll2.gif

Making sure the feline adjusts ok to baby is of upmost importance....

#13 la di dah

Posted 22 November 2012 - 02:43 PM

QUOTE (Satay chicken @ 22/11/2012, 03:40 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
roll2.gif

Making sure the feline adjusts ok to baby is of upmost importance....

We're pretty sure that the stupider, squishier cat will be fine in 3 days because she'll forget we ever didn't have a baby. If it makes any scary noises she'll just hide from it.

The other cat may be less impressed but then again if the baby upchucks milk he'll think we got him a food dispenser and that he would forgive.  biggrin.gif

I think that's actually less sad than the nursery colour scheme debate. And the storyboard collages I've made. unsure.gif blush.gif

#14 WibbleWobble

Posted 22 November 2012 - 02:44 PM

QUOTE (- Poppy - @ 22/11/2012, 03:26 PM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
I drank.

Not good advice obviously but the my first baby I am pregnant with now was actually concieved on after a drunken night when DH and I actually decided we would take a break because I was going batty.


This.

The first year I totally focused on TTC until it became way to consuming. After that I decided to find some other projects, so I started a new job and some study so that I had other things that took my focus off TTC.

#15 kentieness

Posted 22 November 2012 - 03:01 PM

I'm still trying to figure it out. I struggle with it every day and am constantly thinking about TTC/pregnancy/babies, which I then tell myself off for because I seem to have convinced myself that the more I think about it, the less likely it is to happen!

I wish I could just switch my brain off and stop thinking about it all. A friend at work (who knows I've been TTC for nearly 2 years) was telling me she tried for 1 month and it didn't happen so she decided to wait until the end of the year, but then "bam!" she was pregnant. Therefore I need to just stop thinking about it and it will happen! Duh! Such helpful advice!

Basically I just whinge and cry to my husband a lot.

#16 MrsRadiant

Posted 22 November 2012 - 03:07 PM

I have been doing a fair bit of baking and keeping my eyes on recipe mags instead of baby mags/books.
Also seem to be a bit obsessive about keeping our house clean when im home, so my mind is occupied.

#17 Three Of Hearts

Posted 22 November 2012 - 03:25 PM

Time and focus.

I've found with time I tended to stop focusing on the TTC part and more on the others.  The longer it took the more I started to refocus on other things that I'd pushed aside whilst going TTC crazy.  After time you tend to stop the 'oh I shouldn't think about that holiday to *insert place* because I would be 8 months pregnant by then' etc etc and you go back to 'Yep I'm going to book that holiday and if I'm pg well I'll deal with it then'.  Well that's what I've found anyway!

Now after finding out that we were never going to conceive naturally I think I am the calmest I've been in a long time.

ETA - How long have you been TTC OP?

Edited by Allie_D, 22 November 2012 - 03:26 PM.



1 user(s) are reading this topic

0 members, 1 guests, 0 anonymous users

 

A mum's tragic battle against inflammatory breast cancer

At just 37 years of age, with two young sons, Vicki was diagnosed with inflammatory breast cancer. Now her family wants all women to know the symptoms.

The business of babies around the world

Pregnancy and birth is an intriguing process no matter where you are in the world. One soon-to-be father gleans wisdom from a new guide.

Finding a positive path through IVF

It’s not surprising that IVF is often seen as a negative journey towards the ultimate positive, but having a glass-half-full approach can make a big difference to the experience.

Giving strangers the gift of parenthood

A mum explains why she and her husband are choosing to gift their leftover embryos to help strangers achieve their dream of parenthood.

Does morning sickness get better or worse with each child?

Just as every baby is unique, so is every pregnancy. And that means morning sickness can vary a lot, too.

What's so wrong with looking 'mumsy', anyway?

Why is it that the word ‘mumsy’ has connotations of such a negative nature – but seems to be the only other option apart from ‘yummy’?

Trying to speed up the inevitable

As the waiting game of late pregnancy continues, this mum considers a few things that might hurry things up a little.

One month later: where is William Tyrell?

It has been a little over a month since William Tyrell disappeared from his grandmother's home, 33 long sleepless nights for his family as they mourn the absence of their cheeky young boy.

Winter's child less likely to be moody: study

Babies born in the summer are much more likely to suffer from mood swings when they grow up, while those born in the winter are less likely to become irritable adults, scientists claim.

Single mum of two creates award-winning baby app

Suddenly single with a baby and an 11-year-old son, Tara O?Connell developed an app to improve the lives of mothers who were similarly overwhelmed.

Food for thought: looking after yourself as a new mum

As soon as your baby enters the world, everything else takes a back seat - even the necessities of daily life such as eating are severely compromised, right when you need energy the most.

'Grabbable guts' campaign aims to cut toxic fat

The Live Lighter campaign will take people inside the human body to show the internal dangers of being overweight.

The best and worst month of my life

A new mum's first month of motherhood didn't pan out as expected when she lost a family member weeks after her baby's birth.

Facebook and Apple offer to pay female staff to freeze their eggs

Facebook and Apple are hoping to provide women with the freedom to build their careers without the added pressure of having children at or by a certain age.

How a pregnancy contract could work for you and your partner

The idea of making a 'pregnancy contract' with your partner may sound a bit silly at first, but it can help make the transition to parenthood a lot smoother.

Finding a mum-friendly personal trainer

Burping babies vs burpees – yes, new mums and personal trainers live in different worlds. But they can work together - once you find the right match for you and your lifestyle.

Alleged baby snatch incident a ?misunderstanding?, say police

Police say that an incident in which a man pulled on a woman?s pram while walking a popular Sydney route late last month was a misunderstanding.

Ebola killed my aunt and is shutting down my country

Three weeks ago, my auntie, a midwife, developed a fever. Sitting here in Sydney basked in Australian sunshine, that shouldn't be big news.

The night my ovary burst

One mum shares her frightening experience and vows to never take her health for granted again.

Download now: Essential Kids Activity Finder app

Got bored kids? Quickly find the best activities for kids wherever you are in Australia with the Essential Kids app.

 
Advertisement
 
Advertisement
 
 
 

What's hot on EB

Win 1 of 5 Canon Powershot D30 cameras

Capture life more easily with the Canon Powershot D30. Shockproof, waterproof and dustproof, you can take it almost anywhere and shoot beautiful images, time after time. Enter now!

16 parenting truths you won't find in the baby books

I am five years into this parenting gig and I’ve learnt that sleepless nights and changing dirty nappies are child’s play.

Best and worst potty party cakes

It's nice to celebrate a child making the shift from nappies to 'big kid' undies, but do we really need a semi-realistic used toilet cake to do it? Here are some of the best and worst cakes parents have used at 'potty parties' around the world.

7 tips for a financially festive Christmas

Plan ahead - and do it now - to ensure festive season expenses don't break the bank.

'Go the F*** to Sleep' author's new book for frustrated parents

A sequel is coming soon to the 2011 hit book 'Go the F*** to Sleep' - and this time, it's about mealtimes.

Great birthday party buys from Etsy

Handmade crafts to decorate and personalise your child's next birthday - from banners to cake decorations, we've got gorgeous party finds from Etsy.

Creative storage ideas for the kids' rooms

Creative and practical storage ideas for the kids' toys and books can also add some stylish decor to your home. Visit babyology.com.au for more stylish modern finds for hip kids & parents.

The 'yucky' illness that took over my life

I have a chronic illness nobody likes to discuss, as it involves toilet talk. But it needs to be talked about.

To the mum in the doctor's waiting room

Maybe the mum I saw in that waiting room, seemingly disconnected from her baby, doesn’t have the support she needs.

10 space-saving nursery ideas

Starting a family doesn't always mean moving into a bigger house - not yet, anyway.

 

What's in a name?

Baby Names

Looking for a classic name, or an unusual name? Our Baby Name Finder is for you, search or browse to refine your shortlist.

 
Advertisement
 
 
Essential Baby and Essential Kids is the place to find parenting information and parenting support relating to conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids, maternity, family budgeting, family travel, nutrition and wellbeing, family entertainment, kids entertainment, tips for the family home, child-friendly recipes and parenting. Try our pregnancy due date calculator to determine your due date, or our ovulation calculator to predict ovulation and your fertile period. Our pregnancy week by week guide shows your baby's stages of development. Access our very active mum's discussion groups in the Essential Baby forums or the Essential Kids forums to talk to mums about conception, pregnancy, birth, babies, toddlers, kids and parenting lifestyle. Essential Baby also offers a baby names database of more than 22,000 baby names, popular baby names, boys' names, girls' names and baby names advice in our baby names forum. Essential Kids features a range of free printable worksheets for kids from preschool years through to primary school years. For the latest baby clothes, maternity clothes, maternity accessories, toddler products, kids toys and kids clothing, breastfeeding and other parenting resources, check out Essential Baby and Essential Kids.