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Questions about girls chats?

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#1 butterfli

Posted 02 October 2012 - 01:42 PM

My DD is 8, and she knows the basics about how babies get made. Dad has a seed and Mum has an egg and together they make a baby. She doesnt know how they get together, or anything about periods. My huge question is how do I start that conversation???? I want her to know about periods well before she starts getting it, and I know I'm running out of time!How do I start that conversation?????? When do I need to have the in detail dicussion with her about how babies are made? Even though I'm not looking forward to these in depth chats, I want to have them before other chn at school tell her!!!!!!!

Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated!

#2 Carmen02

Posted 02 October 2012 - 01:44 PM

to start the chat about peroids with DD we started looking in a book together and had chats about it after. DD doesnt want to know the in depths about how babies are made lol I tried telling her she said no no no

#3 =R2=

Posted 02 October 2012 - 02:35 PM

DD1 (8) asked me about sex when she was 6 so I took that opportunity to sit her down and explained what sex was (the technical aspect) as well as puberty. I got her a book as well which is very age appropriate and she's free to read and look at it whenever she likes. Now and again she asks me a question or two about something one of her friends has mentioned.

What I struggle with initiating (and it might not be the right time yet) is the conversation about relationships, falling in love, peer pressure, how to recognise healthy friendships, losing your virginity and having good influences in your life etc etc.

#4 butterfli

Posted 02 October 2012 - 03:33 PM

My DD & I already talk about peer pressure(about anything), friendships(some of her friends she lets walk all over her), personal saftey, we talk about her body and what to do in certain situations, so I know that she will feel comfortable talking to me about anything(hopefully). I suppose thats good even if Im unsure how to actually get started on the in depth birds n bees chat, lol!

#5 cward

Posted 02 October 2012 - 10:40 PM

Both my girls (nearly 6 and nearly 10) both know about periods.  They are always coming into the bathroom when I am on the toilet and have seen tampons etc in the cupboard so I have explained about what happens each month although they are not that keen to know!

#6 my serenity

Posted 02 October 2012 - 10:49 PM

My dd 6 knOws the ins and outs if she sees something asks a question I explain it as it is :)Don't make up words or issues say as is original.gif

#7 CallMeFeral

Posted 02 October 2012 - 11:13 PM

My 2.5 and 3.5 year olds know about periods because they don't let me close the bathroom door laughing2.gif As a result they even know about menstrual cups... and DS had a big tanty the other night because he'd wanted to see the cup before I put it back in and I hadn't shown him, and refused to take it out again just for his inspection  ohmy.gif
This time around DD was asking why there was blood so I told her a little bit about my body making a home for a baby, and if no baby is there, it comes out. DS was very upset because I had to explain that he would NOT get a period when he grew up  rolleyes.gif

Can you let your DD just notice a bit more about your normal activities around period time - leave the pads or whatever out, see if she asks?
I have a copy of 'where do I come from' and 'what's happening to me' all ready for my kids to read at some stage - BUT I'm tempted to leave it for when they can read, because I'm still a bit too embarrassed to volunteer to read it myself! But maybe something like that? That was where I got pretty much all my sex education... laughing2.gif

#8 Julie3Girls

Posted 03 October 2012 - 08:25 AM

I agree with just making things a bit more visible to her. If you are grocery shopping with her, stop at the tampons/pads, and grab some for yourself, and just casually say "we'll have to have a chat about periods soon, now you are getting older". Or if you are unpacking groceries, give them to her and ask them to put them in your bathroom, or whatever. This will probably lead to questions. It keeps it casual, rather some big secret thing.

Giving her a couple of books, so she can read at her pace is great too, just make sure you follow up with it later, seeing if she has any questions. I find my DD is more likely to sit and chat about in bed at night, so after I gave her the books, I'd just casually ask if she had questions. Once I did this this the first time, and gave her nice simply answers, she then went on to ask other questions on other nights.

Main thing for me was to keep it simple and straightforward. She didn't need a really detailed answer to begin with. As she got older, she'd ask more detailed questions, and get more info that way. It's a gradual thing, not just a lump of information dumped on her.

#9 librablonde

Posted 03 October 2012 - 08:45 AM

My DD8 has the books "Where Did I Come From?" and the sequel "What's Happening To Me?"  Both are very good at explaining all the technical and emotional aspects of sex, conception, birth and puberty.  She reads them in bed with her beloved chapter books about ponies and magical kittens...LOL original.gif

#10 butterfli

Posted 03 October 2012 - 09:12 PM

My DD has already noticed pads & tampons in the groceries, whenever she asks what thet are I just say "they're for Mummy, we'll talk about them a bit more when you get older"  and I've already brought some books for us to look at together.

I'm just really unsure about what to say and when! I dont want to stuff up the talking with her about this,because I know how important it is to have someone that you feel comfortable talking about body changes!!!

Fingers crossed I get it right!  unsure.gif

#11 Rainbow Lemur

Posted 26 November 2012 - 06:07 AM

I don't think it needs to be a bug production. If she is already asking questions then just give age appropriate factual answers. If you are relaxed about it then likely so will she.

If some of her friend's bodies are maturing you could talk about the changes she would be observing and how periods are part of that.

#12 idignantlyright

Posted 26 November 2012 - 06:23 AM

I had the talk with eldest DD and then it sort of got a bit shorter with each one after her, because they had older sisters to talk to.
DD13 got a call from her friend on friday afternoon asking what she should say to her mum, because she just got her period for the first time and didn't want all the lectures or talks. DD's words of wisdom were "Mum, it's that time of the month and I need some pads. No I don't need to talk, will tell you when I do."
No doubt they will have a girly chat today at school.

#13 jkate_

Posted 26 November 2012 - 10:24 AM

QUOTE (idignantlyright @ 26/11/2012, 04:23 AM) <{POST_SNAPBACK}>
DD13 got a call from her friend on friday afternoon asking what she should say to her mum, because she just got her period for the first time and didn't want all the lectures or talks. DD's words of wisdom were "Mum, it's that time of the month and I need some pads. No I don't need to talk, will tell you when I do."
No doubt they will have a girly chat today at school.

I like this original.gif  Reminds me a bit of my younger sister "Mum, I got my period, where are the pads you had".

#14 sophiasmum

Posted 26 November 2012 - 11:56 AM

Great recommendations for those 2 books, I've ordered them now to give for christmas or her birthday next year original.gif

#15 greatwon2

Posted 26 November 2012 - 12:11 PM

We got our kids the what's happening to my body books, both the girl and boy ones and let them read thru at their own pace and ask questions if they had any , altho for my 12 year old son it was a case of already knowing most of the details so he more skimmed thru it lol . We go camping and i found that the sex/puberty talking was really quite easy for everyone in a tent in the dark, i think not having to sit there making eye contact made it much less confronting for my son ...can't say that it would be ideal for everyone however. I'm a believer of it's never too early to honestly answer questions if their asking - afterall reproduction and the ways in which our bodies change over time are both a natural thing and not something to be ashamed or embarrassed over or to be made taboo, but that's just my personal take on it

#16 RedMummy

Posted 26 November 2012 - 12:21 PM

There is also a really good old youtube clip made by Disney back in the 1940's. Youtube Disney menstruation and it will pop up, it isnt up to date but the diagram is factual and explains it really well and age appropriately.

My daughter is 4 and has already asked how babies are made, I just gave her the age appropriate facts and she seemed pretty content with it for now original.gif

#17 seayork2002

Posted 26 November 2012 - 01:11 PM

I can't suggest how to have the talk but I personally prefer conversations that occur naturally as then it seems more normal rather than making a big deal of it, I am sorry I have not worded it how it is in my head:)

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