Midwife begs people to stop having sex at Christmas

September; nine months after Christmas parties and celebrations.
September; nine months after Christmas parties and celebrations. Photo: Shutterstock

London midwife Mhairi Maharry is exhausted, and so are her fellow midwives, as they have their heads down to work through their busiest time of year: September.

Mhairi recently wrote on Twitter, "How is it only the 5th of September? I can't take 25 more days of this. If you know or love a midwife, PLEASE STOP SHAGGING AT CHRISTMAS."

As someone who has given birth to three September babies, I feel like I need to step up and take some responsibility for Mhairi's exhaustion. I remember my obstetrician telling me September is her busiest month because everyone gets super-relaxed (which I read to mean slightly squiffy) over the summer holidays.

At least, that's how I did it. My mother likes to tell people she's never buying me champagne for Christmas again.

Although as a 43-year-old single mum of three, I don't think there's enough champagne in the world to make that happen.

My September triumvirate was entirely unintentional but it has its advantages. Yes, one month of my year is now filled with birthday parties and SO MUCH CAKE, but once they're done, I don't have to think about birthdays again for another year.

But I've never stopped to spare a thought for the poor midwives.

It seems Mhairi struck a chord with her post. It's been liked over 16,000 times and attracted hundreds of comments.

Eliza Doodle replied, "I'm so sorry, my first child was a September baby. The midwife on the ward was nearing a breakdown. I can't apologise enough."

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Coxy said, "Haha oh this had me howling, sorry!! If it helps, currently 38+6 and the pelvic pain is ALL THE PAYBACK."

Vicki Thornley, a paediatric doctor agreed with Mhairi, simply replying, "Hear, hear."

It seems Mhairi's feelings are entirely justified, with a spike in the birth rate in September – with the 26th being the most popular date (my eldest, sorry!).

So if you want to help Mhairi and her mates out, maybe stick to cuddling this Christmas.